A cab drops Mark off at his apartment. The rain is finally ending, but Mark is still rather wet as he enters his apartment. He hurries to the bathroom and sheds his wet clothes. Drawing a hot bath, Mark grabs his phone in the futile hopes that Brian had called or texted. Nothing.
The tears start to fill Mark’s eyes again. ‘Why the hell am I so emotional?’ Mark chastises himself. He can’t help himself. Mark has never really cared about another person to any degree. Sure, his mates are his mates, but not someone in a romantic way.
Lying in the tub feeling the hot water float over him, Mark goes back to that first Monday with Brian.
oOo
All-day at work, Mark kept looking at his phone. He managed to get his work done, but he tried to think of something to text Brian about as he did. Something not to sound needy but get a response, and maybe an invitation to do something that night.
Everything he thought of sounded so lame and obvious. Then around three o’clock, his phone beeped. A message from Brian!
Brian: Hey buddy, I talked with Pathways, and if you are available, they have an opening tomorrow at four. Let me know.
Mark: That was fast. Umm, sure, sign me up.
Brian: Good. Afterward, would you like to go out to dinner with me?
Mark barely contained himself and tried to hold back a minute from answering immediately. Which lasted fifteen seconds. That sounds great. I would like that.
Brian: Then I will pick you up at about six tomorrow evening. I’ll call you this evening to tell you more about your session tomorrow.
Mark: I’ll look forward to it.
Mark’s heart was beating so fast. Brian did want to see him tomorrow night. But the session first. He wondered what it would be like. He cleared his desk and packed up his laptop. Mark figured he would get some of tomorrow’s tasks done tonight at home so he could be out of work by two-thirty tomorrow.
Brian and Mark did talk on the phone that night for a couple of hours. Luckily, Mark had just finished up what he wanted to get done for tomorrow. Brian explained a bit about what would happen in the counseling sessions. He admitted after a break-up, he had gone through counseling to help him deal with how it had ended.
Brian did not go into details then; it was a story to tell Mark down the road. He did ask Mark if he had ever watched any male-on-male porn or erotica. Brian was curious just how much Mark truly comprehended what was involved in such a relationship. Mark confessed he had not ever, really.
Brian told him to turn to a specific channel that did show gay movies and clips. Together they watched one movie unfold, Brian urging Mark to ask any questions and tell him what he thought. Mark did have many questions about how it felt: did it hurt, was it hard to do?
Watching the movie with Brian explaining things made Mark realize that being with another man was more than just the kissing and rubbing the two had done this weekend. Mark did, in theory, know what two guys did together but never really thought about technical aspects.
For Mark, just discovering his attraction to Brian was eye-opening in itself. Brian had figured this might be the case, which is why he emphasized them going slow and counseling for Mark. Brian wanted to be sure Mark was okay with what he had seen and asked him. In a small voice, Mark replied he was.
“Buddy, you don’t sound that sure of yourself right now. Would you like me to come over for a little while so we can talk about this more?” Brian asked. Mark was kicking himself for acting so wimpy but did want Brian there holding him as he sorted things out in his head.
“Would you, Brian?” Mark whispered into the phone. Brian told him to hold tight, and he would be there soon. While waiting, Mark noticed the time. It was after eleven o’clock. What type of shit would Brian think he was, wanting him to come to comfort him so late?
When Brian arrived, Mark was only wearing a pair of boxer shorts. Mark had not thought about putting more clothes on after hanging up with Brian. Mark had stripped down as he usually did when home from work and not going anywhere that evening. After he hand hung up the phone, his mind was whirling with everything he had seen in the movies. The movie was still playing, and Mark, like a deer in the headlights, just stared as a man mounted another and rammed his large cock into the waiting hole.
Twenty minutes later, Mark was pulled from his staring upon hearing his doorbell. Brian was standing there in just a pair of sweatpants and hoodie. Brian didn’t seem to mind Mark’s manner of dress at all. He pulled Mark into his arms, rubbing his back as he hugged him tightly.
“Buddy, are you alright thinking about the different ways we would be together? Maybe that movie was a bit much to understand. It is so different when there are mutual feelings of joy for both when in a good relationship. And don’t worry, we will not go any farther than you are ready to,” Brian comforted him.
“Thanks, Brian. I guess I haven’t thought of what it all meant. I am still trying to work out how attracted I am to you. Kissing you, what we did yesterday, and rubbing against you all were so new to experience. And I do want to do everything I saw. I just need some time to go to each level,” Mark told him in a soft voice.
Mark behaving this way and being shy now was new to him. Rather than being loud and boisterous how he usually was, now having these new feelings and longing for Brian made him softer and willing to show his naivety.