This isn't a confession as such and it's not a diary entry as I have never kept a diary in my life; it is just the sordid story of how my life changed in a week.
It started with me doing something that I hadn't done in a long time. Perhaps because it had been so long since the last time that I was out of practice. It was something that I avoided doing as much as possible. I didn't enjoy doing it because it filled me with dreaded anxiety and it was generally a rather depressing exercise. What is this incredibly difficult and tedious task, you may well ask? Did she go bungee jumping? Sky diving? MMA fighting? Well, no, nothing that extreme but it sometimes felt like it to me. I went clothes shopping. Worse still, I went clothes shopping during a time when I was feeling quite confident. Sundays find me relaxed and combined with the good weather tends to have me feeling good about life and therefore a bit more confident.
Monday morning comes around, however, and I am not the same person I was on Sunday afternoon. I looked at the clothes I had purchased yesterday and laid out to wear today and wondered if I was perhaps mildly deranged yesterday. Did I drink alcohol at lunchtime? No, I don't think I did. What the hell was I thinking? I mean, don't get me wrong, it was a very cute skirt and blouse combo and, when matched with a jacket I already had, it was a very nice outfit. But and I do mean a large, all capital letters “BUT” here, that skirt was way shorter than any other skirt I had ever bought before.
This might sound ridiculous, but I usually used the “freckle” rule when buying skirts. Thanks to my Dutch heritage, I am fairly tall for a woman at six feet, two inches, and I have quite long legs. This was something I got teased about a lot as a kid so I had made a habit of trying to disguise my long legs with long skirts and dresses. Just over halfway down my thigh, closer to the knee than my butt, I have a freckle. I have never bought a skirt that didn't fall past the freckle, usually a long way past it. This skirt was above it. It felt way way way above it but in reality, it was about two inches above it. It wasn't obscenely short by anyone's standard but it was a lot shorter than any I had ever worn before and short enough to gain attention from those who liked to look. The thought of this gave me a small thrill but also terrified me.
I eyed the skirt suspiciously as though it had dared to shrink overnight but then, after a lot of self-goading, I told myself to get over it and just put the damn thing on. I pulled it up and slid the zipper up after tucking in my blouse, then turned to look in the mirror. To my surprise I discovered that it looked good, I mean really good, perhaps a little too good if you catch my meaning. I was impressed with the way it hugged my thighs and accentuated my butt. I liked the way I looked in it and although it was quite a professional-looking skirt it was somewhat sexier than I usually wear.
It was at that moment that I thought of Stefan. He was, undoubtedly, a good-looking man. He always wore the nicest tailor-made suits and he had a very nice figure. Such a great squeezable ass. I blushed as I thought about getting a nice firm handful of his ass and perhaps a handful of something else might make a nice change too.
“For fuck’s sake, Samantha, has it really been that long? Are you that incapable of getting through the day without thinking about cock?”
I blushed even further, realising that I was talking out loud to myself and thinking far too much about cock. It wasn't something that I would normally obsess over but just lately there had felt like a distinct lack of it in my life. I hadn't even bothered trimming lately and to say it was a bit of a wild jungle down there was gross understatement. God help me if some random situation occurred, like I was hit by a bus and carted off in an ambulance, or even more terrifying, I found myself in bed with a man. I laughed at the ridiculousness of that thought but still vowed to tidy up a bit tonight. Perhaps a little attention and self-appreciation might help take my mind off the dry spell I had run up against.
My phone alarm started beeping and I realised I had dawdled and day-dreamed a little too long and now had to hurry to catch my train on time. I no longer had time to change my skirt now and the decision had been made for me. I threw my jacket on, picked up my bag and ran down the stairs. I grabbed a breakfast bar and my keys as I ran through the kitchen then I was out the front door. It was only two blocks to the train station and then down a huge flight of stairs to the subway. It would generally only take me ten minutes to get there and that would see me getting there just before the train arrived providing nothing goes wrong between here and there.
Thankfully it was a smooth trip, being early in the morning, and I made it onto the platform as I heard the train rumbling around the bend coming into the station. It was kind of nice to pretty much walk straight onto the train without waiting but it did leave me feeling rushed and when you start the day rushing around you feel like you never catch up.
I looked around the mostly empty carriage and chose a seat. One advantage of being near the end of the line when you get on the train is that you almost always get a seat straight away. I wasn't obsessed with getting a seat on my own because usually by the next station, or maybe the one after the carriage was pretty full anyway. Because I didn't catch the first or last train of the day either it was usually an express train, meaning that it stopped at fewer stations. It made it a much quicker, smoother trip into town. If I needed to get into town half an hour earlier than usual it meant I had to start out over an hour earlier. It was always busy on the first and last train of the day too.
Other routes around the city were far more populated and the trains ran twenty-four hours a day there, but I lived in an area that wasn't massively populated and then it was mostly office workers of some description like myself that caught the trains. People with real money drove their BMWs and Mercedes into town and parked in their private parking spaces; while those who worked in industry or construction usually drove because the trains were rarely going where they needed to go and they couldn't carry all their tools.
I sat down and dug around in my bag for my book. After finding it I placed my bag between my feet and leaned back into the seat. It wasn't long before I was lost in my story. This was an unusual choice of book for me. I read a lot of different styles of books, usually fantasy fiction but rarely anything very erotic. It's not that I have a problem with erotica, it's just not usually my go-to genre. This book was a recommendation from a friend. It was primarily a sci-fi story but there happened to be quite a bit of erotica in this one. I was enjoying the story and the sexual escapades in it were as hot as they were unexpected. Several times I had found myself squirming in my seat as my pussy reminded me of its existence and the fact that it had been quite some time since it had seen any action.
I was in the middle of a very erotic scene where the main protagonist had his cock buried deep inside the pussy of his counterpart and was railing her enthusiastically. It was incredibly vivid and detailed and I was getting very turned on. I lowered the book to take a small break because I could feel my face becoming flushed and I was fighting the desire to reach down and give myself a little rub. As I lowered the book a little, I looked across at the seat opposite me. A man was sitting there in his suit, and his face looked as flushed as mine felt. He was alternating between licking his lips and gently biting his bottom lip and his eyes seemed to be glued to my lap.
What the fuck? He's looking up my skirt! I thought as I was about to sit upright and cover myself up, but then something stopped me. It was the strangest thing, normally I would be mortified, but instead of indignation or anger, a shiver ran through my whole body. The moment I realised that my short skirt had betrayed me and that he was staring at my panty-clad pussy I had two thoughts run through my head.
“That dirty bastard is staring at my pussy!” This was said in my mind with disgust and anger.
Quickly followed by, “That dirty bastard is staring at my pussy.” This time it was said with a smirk and a shiver of excitement.
The two emotions were at war with each other for no more than a microsecond with a sound and shocking victory going to the slutty side of my personality that was all but dormant these days. It seemed to wake up with a snarl and a lot more strength than I would have believed. My nipples hardened almost immediately and the excited tingling I was feeling in my pussy seemed to go up a notch or three. I almost had to force myself to not respond in the way I normally would but once I mastered and overcame the impulse to slam my thighs together and I realised I was now deliberately showing this man my underwear, my excitement went through the roof.
I never would have believed that being an exhibitionist would turn me on quite so much. I mean, yeah, I knew it would probably be exciting but not something that people like me do, but this level of excitement was something else altogether. The thought that the only thing preventing him from having a perfect view of my undoubtedly wet pussy was a pair of thin, floral-patterned, cotton panties was incredible.
Keeping my book up but just low enough to appear as though I am engrossed in it and not watching this naughty pervert, I moved my legs just slightly further apart and tilted my hips a little further back. His eyes widened even further and I had to stifle a giggle. The very real struggle I was having at this point was to stifle the desire to give myself a little rub right in front of this stranger. How fun it would be to pull my panties to the side, spread my lips with my fingers and play with my clit right now. My little fantasy had me getting so hot and wet as this was going on. I seemed to lose all track of time as I watched this man watching me. The train began to slow down for another station and I glanced up at the platform sign and was shocked to see that we were only one station away from my destination.
The train took off again and I stayed in my current position for as long as I possibly could until I had no choice but to move. I folded my book closed and sat upright, closing my legs in the process then reached forward for my bag. I placed my book in the bag and tried to collect my thoughts. It was like my brain had sort of short-circuited.
The train slowed right down as it approached my platform and I prepared to join the passengers as they stood up ready to get off. I glanced up and the man who had been so entranced by my crotch the whole way in was now standing in front of me with his own crotch only an arm’s length away from me. He was trying to be nonchalant but it was obvious to me at this height that his cock was rock hard and straining against the front of his suit pants. While I watched surreptitiously out of the corner of my eye, I saw his hand sneak out from under the coat he was carrying. He squeezed and pushed as he tried to wrestle his cock into a more comfortable and somewhat less obvious position.
I had to close my eyes and take a deep breath. I wanted nothing more than to reach out and squeeze that cock myself. He wasn't a man that I found particularly attractive but damn the situation was driving me wild. I stood up and for the first time, our eyes met. Normally I would have never held eye contact with a stranger on the train but this whole experience seemed to have changed something within me. I gave him a knowing smirk and winked at him. He blushed a deep crimson red but said nothing. The door slid open and I chuckled as I turned away from him. I walked off the train and across the platform displaying my best ass-swinging swagger that I could without looking like I had dislocated a hip or something. I could feel his eyes on my ass the whole way across the platform.
The two-block walk from the train station to work was one of the best I had ever had. I couldn't believe how confident I felt. I wasn't used to feeling desired like that and I discovered that I liked it a lot and wanted more.
My boyfriends in the past had been of a certain type. Almost to a man they were shy, lacking confidence, needy, and inexperienced with women. I couldn't have told you why I continuously went for this type, other than perhaps my own lack of confidence. I have no idea what it was about this type of man that I found alluring, maybe I felt that I could help them find some confidence, but it was also the reason I had been single for a long time now. I knew they were no good for me and as a result, I had all but given up on dating.
I arrived at my office building and rode the elevator up to the twentieth floor. It was a tall building almost entirely full of office spaces. The top floor was a restaurant that had a separate elevator, although for health and safety reasons you could get to and from the restaurant via the stairs but nobody ever did that. The people who worked in the offices of this building were not of the right wage bracket to be eating at this restaurant with its amazing views and menu, so the stairs had probably only ever been used a dozen times since the building was opened, sometime back in the nineties.
The ground floor had a large reception desk with people to guide visitors to the appropriate floors and offices as well as a café and public toilets. It had a large, plant-filled atrium and an open feeling. The fittings and architecture were all modern and beautiful but it was a facade. The majority of the building was purely about functionality. Peek behind and into any of the staff-only areas or the stairwell and it was all the dull, grey concrete and steel of practicality.
The office I worked in was essentially one-quarter of the twentieth floor. We shared the floor with three other businesses. The elevator runs up the centre of the building and when you exit the elevator, you step into a curved corridor that runs almost entirely around the elevator shaft.
Turn left and there is a door on the right to Finkal and Sons. Nobody seems to know what goes on in there because there is rarely anyone in the office, the door is always closed, and there is no other signage to suggest what kind of firm it is. There are rumours of course and I have heard everything from blood diamonds, mercenaries, and dark web specialists. I think it's most likely a tax dodge which is a far less romantic or exciting option but infinitely more believable.
Continue to the left and you come to the end of the corridor that is our front door. When the business is open, so is the door. That was Mario’s rule and Stefan hasn't changed that since taking over. Not that I minded either way. There was no passing traffic and if someone came to the door then it was for only one of two reasons. They either had an appointment and I knew they were coming, or they were lost, having gotten off the elevator on the wrong floor.