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Pelwrath
1 month ago
Straight Male, 64
0 miles · Spencerport

Forum

Advanced Wordsmith
That's a good poem, Fuzzy 1954. Below is my Bardic contribution.

HALLOWEEN NIGHT

Horror for scary hovel ready, now that the sun has set.

Hordes of tricksters descend, treats gladly accepted.

Lonely goblin with bag in hand; invites gleefully leering big wolves.

Lovely witch's broom doesn't work, dithers beside doorway, lonesome.

Overcast skies portent, up in the air; to insist unruly individuals plod sequentially onward.

Creatures wicked gasp at apples given out; growl awesome woe-some curses.

Even tempered souls who answer doors, applaud wonderful sights till the end.

Enduring legacy from centuries before continued; on moonlight evening.

Night-crawlers are gone and door side cauldrons empty; children share delights as grownups aver, Nevermore!
Advanced Wordsmith
How easy and useful would it be if there was am option for a half grade? Say you clicked any score under 5, then there'd be an option for a"+" or ".5" to click. I do like the "like" option. Could a score vote be tied to a comment? The score is listed in the comment you leave.
Advanced Wordsmith
Yes , writing about the sex and craeting a viable story. Also, there's burnout/frustration from reading stories as well. I also have a time discerning, for the story, when the 'rules' of some types of relationships/sex styles are glossed over vs. real life.
Advanced Wordsmith
Here are some examples of famous writers who weren't the best at writing. https://www.huffpost.com/entry/grammar-rules_n_4768485

Read, write, and learn. The more you do each, the better you'll become. If you want more feedback, ask for it but be prepared to accept what you'll be told. IMHO, any good critique will include good and bad comments and suggestions.
Advanced Wordsmith
Whispers in a Bolgia


Loving whispers beckon,
across time and space.
I see your and his apparitions,
atop the companionway.

Fresh from memories distant past
I’m tortured when I see your locket.
Searching for your warmth
in a frozen waste.

Captain Smith is held deeply by his lover.
Would holding you again stop
the ice pick
from playing on my heart?

One staircase left to climb,
as it always is.
The half frozen beast
never lets me ascend.

The judges cast their ballots
with our cheating hearts.
Advanced Wordsmith
Congrats on the EP! You’re one heck of a writer, I might get one in another three years. I both learn from and enjoy your stories.
Advanced Wordsmith
Here is the link for the first in the Flame of Vengeance: https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/-the-flame-of-vengeance-is-red-.aspx

The link for the beginning of my Desires Flame series and first erotic story I;ve written: https://www.lushstories.com/stories/novels/-orange-is-desires-flame-.aspx

one of my poems: https://www.lushstories.com/stories/erotic-poems/-your-ladys-dreams-.aspx

The begining of How Far Would I go for Love series: https://www.lushstories.com/stories/threesomes/-how-far-would-i-go-for-love-.aspx
Advanced Wordsmith
Read the first part and enjoyed it. Left a comment and looking forward for part 2 .
Advanced Wordsmith
I’ll add that in the newest story, I’m looking for suggestions in the comments about things the reader(s) would like to see. I’ve some general notes for it but nothing concrete. I may not use the entire idea but am looking forward to what the readers would be interested in.
Advanced Wordsmith
I'm interested in receiving critique's about my stories. Here is my most recent https://www.lushstories.com/stories/love-stories/-vince-and-abbys-first-threesome-that.aspx

You're more than welcome to post them here any suggestions that could help me might be able to help other writers on lush. I've been told by a MOd(Curvey) that my writing is really improving. Reading the stories of that were selected as RR's and those in the recent competition, multiple times.

As a reader, I do tend to over analyze a story and that might affect my writing, maybe that's my style. I stepped away from that with my "How far would I go for Love" series, the first is here https://www.lushstories.com/stories/threesomes/-how-far-would-i-go-for-love-.aspx Based on votes, comments and views it's my most successful story here, yet I don't see what makes it better than my other stories.

If anyone would like a critique from em, i's be happy to provide them.

Thanks,

Pelwrath
Advanced Wordsmith
Comments are the best, be they good or bad. I learn from either and have even PM'd a member when I didn't understand their comment or was looking for more information. I always than each person who comments on my stories or poems.
Advanced Wordsmith
The longer a story is the fewer views it generally receives. Not to say I and others don’t read 9k+ stories, members do. There seems to be a drop in views the more chapters you have. It’s a tough balancing act. I look at a max of 3-4k words, a personal choice as I’m looking for feedback on my story.
Advanced Wordsmith
Was there just a winner, congrats to Browncoffee for that great story, or were there finalists, honorable mention stories?
Advanced Wordsmith
Quote by Stormdog


It's not easy putting stories out there that people seem to really enjoy - which is one reason it's so gratifying when readers vote and comment to let you know if they liked it, or what did or didn't work.

Good luck - and even though you've worked hard and put a lot of thought and effort in, try not to take it personally if you get a bad vote or critical review. No writer (or story) is going to appeal to everyone.


Stormdog,

Thanks for you comment. A bad vote won't bother me, I hope there's an explanatory comment. I can only control my writing. It's taken a bit for me to grasp(?) the relationship between views, votes, and comments. I was pleasantly stunned when I saw my average score for the Notorious competition. I never expected to receive such a good score and the comments also were supportive and very complimentary. If a reader doesn't want to leave one of my stories a bad comment or vote, I'm fine with a PM explaining what the did and or didn't like. It's the only way I'll improve.
For me erotica is using sex/romance to help advance the story line, develop the characters, and give the readers an enjoyable story. I think(hope) I've improved from the stories I first posted to the more recent.
Advanced Wordsmith
Thank you all for your input and suggestions. I've several stories up and I've tried to use these suggestions, hopefully with good effect. Improvement is a constant as a writer.
Advanced Wordsmith
Out of couriosity, how many of us have had stories and or books published? If so, in what genres?

I’ve been fortunate to have 1sci-fi short story and 3 flash stories published. Have a vampire book waiting for me to save enough for an edit and the draft of an erotic series that I’ve posted here.
Advanced Wordsmith
I'd read 3 or 4 before I decided to enter a story. About the same time Darkside suggested that I enter a story. I think I've read and commented on every story so far. Many have returned the favor and I've noticed that several of my other stories have had more views, votes and comments. I never new what the judging system was and I should've do my due diligence about that, so my bad. For me it's a respect thing. If a writer is willing to put their work out there, exposed to the winds and currents of others, that's a big thing. Then to write a full story in 1000 words is even tougher. I feel each participant deserves my vote and comment. A good writer is also a good reader.
Advanced Wordsmith
I've greatly enjoyed the stories in the competition so far, they're well written and pretty darn good. My question is that it seems weighted for those with large followings. Newer members don't seem to have the notariety to have the voters and comments. Now, I know my story isn't good enough for much but the experience has been a great learning one. Would it make sense to have all who enter comment/vote on all other entries?
Advanced Wordsmith
Thanks for posting this and, on another site, I’m participating in NaPWriMo.
Advanced Wordsmith
I tried as was suggested and all it shows is that I have 14 comments. There are 20 stories listed before mine and I've no idea any significance in that. I'd love to know how many votes i have, could that be related to membership status/level?
Advanced Wordsmith
Now that’s the first time I’ve seen a lady want to shot her pussy with lead, to get a vote.

That said, I’d like any who haven’t, which is a fair number, to comment and vote on my story. Theoretically if 85% of the members here voted for me, I might be able to win. Fortunately I’m only looking for comments that help me improve as a writer, failure only means I keep posting below average stories. My story is. Cover Your Bets. The pitch fork and burning torch meeting about my story, scheduled for 10pmEST, has been postponed to Tuesday night at the same time.
Advanced Wordsmith
Hammer Man



There was a young man with a hammer.

For whom all the ladies would clamour.

That not every bald head

is a nine-pin, they said

because all he could do was rammer.
Advanced Wordsmith
@SensuousCurves: If the pay attention to your desires and needs, haven't they then captured your attention?
Advanced Wordsmith
A Sophisticated Lady


Sophisticated Lady

DRINK TYPE: COCKTAIL
INGREDIENTS
1 1/2 oz. Knappogue Castle Whiskey
1/2 oz. Briottet Crème de Figue
2 drop(s) Dry Vermouth
INSTRUCTIONS
Shake with 4 ice cubes in a metal shaker until can is frosty and garnish with a small fresh fig.