“Honey, this is Dean. Dean, this is my husband Rick,” she said kind of awkwardly given the possible situation.
Dean was, by my first impression, a good-looking average guy. Not a gym rat, not overly dressed, not terribly young. Honestly, he had a very kind face. Certainly not the type to go accosting women in their places of business, at least, outwardly. He had light-colored eyes, the kind that doesn’t really have a defined shade, if I had to call them something, I suppose hazel would describe them best. Medium length, wavy, brownish, auburn colored hair, little bits of grey, here and there. He seemed, based on appearances, pretty normal. I don’t know what I was expecting and I wasn’t sure if I was relieved or disappointed.
Dean extended his hand, “Hi Rick, it’s really nice to meet you.”
I just looked at him unflinchingly and said, “Is it really? If the circumstances reversed, I’d be a little nervous, if I were you. I might have come here just to hospitalize you. So, just how much do you like your teeth?”
“Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t know,” Dean replied, startled, and began to try and defend himself but I cut him off.
“What you ‘didn’t know,’ I began, “Was that your behavior with my wife would involve being confronted,” I said sternly. “You, my friend, got very, very lucky. You are here tonight at the request and generosity of my wife. It is she that makes all the decisions in this circumstance, so if I were you, I’d be on my very best most respectful behavior and tread very lightly. There are no guarantees. Do we understand each other?” I said forcefully. I could feel the tension and you squeezed my hand.
“This is off to a wonderful start,” she said sarcastically. In your head thoughts raced:
( Run! Just Run! This was an awful idea! It’s gonna get ugly and it’s gonna get ugly soon. I need a drink, man do I need a drink. This is so embarrassing. I’m probably red! My ears are red, I can feel them! Okay, okay, just calm down and act like this is any other dinner…)
“Uh, yes, that’s pretty clear,” Dean responded after having his place defined.
“Good, then why don’t we pretend like we’re all old friends, have a nice evening, and see where it takes us,” I suggested seating you in the booth between Dean and myself.
“I need a drink,” Dean said sounding a bit relieved and rattled. I noticed the waitress heading over to our booth. Dean ordered a bourbon, I ordered my wife a Long Island Ice Tea, thinking that might be helpful in this particular situation and I ordered three shots of tequila.
“Oh Honey, I don’t want any tequila,” she said responding to my order.
“They’re all for me,” I clarified. “I think I may need them,” To which everyone laughed. “Well, if you think that’s funny then you’re going to love this. Since this is your party, Dean, you get to pay the bar bill.”
“Okay, okay, that’s fair,” he responded.
(Long Island Iced Tea!? That’s my drink of death! I can’t drink those things, I don’t know what might happen! Good Grief, what might happen? I have no idea what might happen! And Rick seated me between them? This is uncomfortable! What did I get myself into?)
Small talk ensued, that seemed both necessary and meaningless, but after an hour. It had seemed to defuse the situation to a tolerable level.
Instead of ordering dinner, we had them serve a bunch of finger food which was largely untouched. Instead, drinks were anxiously consumed. As the tequila hit my brain, I began to be a bit less confrontational and was able to relax somewhat.
My hand unconsciously rubbed her thigh, like I always do, as we talked about former vacations, aches and pains, and normal life.
( Oh my gosh, Rick is rubbing my thigh! Just relax, just relax, that’s normal, just drink your drink of death and relax. Act like you’re paying attention. This is fine, no big deal, nothing to see here. Everything is just fine. )
I continued rubbing her leg under the table and I had managed to gather the bottom of your skirt. I slid it up to her mid-thigh, exposing the silky skin to my warm fingertips. I could tell from the positioning of his upper arm that his hand was resting on her opposite thigh and as far as I could tell, she had made no attempt to remove it. Pretty brazen, I thought, but I suppose the liquid courage was working on him too.
(OH CRAP OH CRAP OH CRAP! Dean’s hand is on my thigh! I don’t know what to do! Do I move it? Leave it there? I don’t want to make a scene! Oh my GOSH! There’s going to be trouble! BIG BIG TROUBLE! I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE! ABORT! ABORT! The bathroom, yeah, that's it. Go to the bathroom! )
She suddenly went about as stiff as a board, abruptly announcing that she had to go to the restroom, and hastily, off she went. I didn’t think much of it at the time.
“So, how long have you two been together?” Dean asked casually.
I just looked at him flatly in complete silence until I said, “Long enough to establish an understanding of trust that most couples couldn’t comprehend.”
My phone buzzed, it was a text from the bathroom.
( OH MY GOSH! I’m so nervous. My anxiety is through the roof and I think I’m getting tipsy. It’s not helping. )
“I’m very nervous,” she messaged, “I’m anxious and a little tipsy too.”
“I understand Honey,” I answered. “What would you like to do?”
( I don’t know! I don’t know! If something is going to happen, I wish it would. I can’t handle the waiting…and why isn’t he mad?? He seems perfectly calm, the jerk.)
“I don’t know, but I feel like I’m waiting for something to happen one way or the other and I’m not sure what that something is,” she replied.
“Well, just come back to the table, I’ll order you another drink and we’ll see how it goes.”
“Okay, I’m coming back now.”
She came walking across the dining room, looking irresistible wearing that sweet little tipsy grin she has and I got up to let her take the seat between us again.
We were all reasonably close together and we resumed talking. I figured it was now or never and I slipped my hand under her skirt and caressed her leg from her hip to her knee. Each time I stroked her thigh, I ventured a bit higher, creeping ever closer to what I supposed might be the shared quarry. Even though everyone seemed engaged in conversation, completely ignoring what was happening under the table, it was clear that that was where the attention was truly focused.
{Man, that drink is hitting me like a freight train, and here I have two men that want to meet me in the middle. Uh oh. Here we go again. Two thighs, two hands, two men. It’s a race. I sure am glad this tablecloth is long. Just be calm and drink your drink. No one’s looking. Oooh, but there’s definitely a race going on here. Rick is coming up on the right thigh, making a run for it. But Dean’s taken to the inside. He’s moving up fast. Rick is narrowing the gap but, Dean’s coming up fast on the inside, making a dash for the finish line…and…and…we have a winner! )
As Dean continued to speak, I glanced at her and her eyes were suddenly huge, like a deer in headlights. She sat motionless, almost ridged, her eyes transfixed on something undefined across the room.
( OH CRAP! CRAP! CRAP! CRAP! Rick doesn’t know the race is over, and Dean has his prize! It’s ME! HE’S IN THE WINNER'S CIRCLE! THERE’S GONNA BE TROUBLE! HONEY, THE RACE IS OVER! )
Dean was going on about the details of his broken marriage. Her face was so red that I was certain that even her scalp was crimson. The straw from her drink never left her lips. I figured it was because my roving fingers kept getting closer and closer to her sweet, pink hot box. It was only when I decided to clandestinely stroke that little kitten, that I discovered someone had beaten me to the party.
( OH MY GOSH! OH MY GOSH! THIS IS BAD, HERE IT COMES! THE EXPLOSION! I GOTTA GET OUT OF THE BLAST AREA! I’M GROUND ZERO! )
There was a sudden and instant chain of events. Dean moved his hand as though she had a mouse trap in her panties. My entire body flushed and my temperature must have risen by 100 degrees. She announced that she had to use the restroom again and frantically climbed over me as if escaping the Titanic. Hastily heading for the bathroom, she left Dean and me alone once again.
“Well, that was awkward,” he said.
“Yeah, but what did you expect? You don’t even know her. She’s not this kind of person. This isn’t something she’d even consider, yet, here we are.”
“I’m not that kind of person either,” he remarked.
“You mean the kind of person that confronts women, backs them into a corner, and grabs their crotches? That kind of person?” I said sarcastically.
“Okay, I deserved that,” he offered weakly. “I’ve never done anything like that before.”
“Well, you did it to her, TWICE!!”
“I swear, I just couldn’t help myself.”
“Evidently, you did help yourself,” I took a deep breath and said, “I do understand how someone could feel that way about her. She has an attractive quality she’s not even aware of. I’m not even sure she knows what she’s doing. I don’t know what I’m doing. I have no idea what’s going to happen, maybe nothing at all. I don’t know if anyone knows what's going on.“
“I just wanted to get to know her better. She’s so beautiful and so smart. Not to mention off-the-charts hot.“
“And by saying, 'get to know her better,' you mean sleep with her, ”I remarked stating the obvious. “Look,” I continued, “I get all that and every word is true. I understand how you can feel that way. But I know her, she is very subtle, very shy and when she wants to be, she’s a little temptress, a little closet vixen. She’s also a bit affectionate when she’s tipsy.”
Across the restaurant, she cautiously opened the bathroom door to see if she could hear sounds of commotion, however, everything sounded normal. No one was running in a panic. No sounds of breaking dinnerware and no sirens. That was good unless someone was already dead. But if someone was already dead there’d be screaming and sirens and all that.
She suppressed a giggle, no doubt brought on by the Long Island Ice Teas and the absurdity of the situation thus far.
( If they want to play, then maybe I should give them something to think about. Gosh, I’m tipsy. I better sit down for a minute. Nothing on my phone, no message, that’s good. Oh…there’s an idea. No,…no….I can’t.
That’s too much…and what I’m doing isn’t too much? What the hell. I’ll show them who’s racing.)
The waitress came over to the table and Dean ordered another round of drinks.
“I’m not going to push this or pressure her, Dean,” I said choosing my words carefully. “This whole thing is for her and she sets the pace. If she says no, then it’s no. I don’t know if she really wants this or is just toying with this new form of attention. She may just simply be curious. And one other thing, if anything further does happen, it’s not for idle conversation outside of the three of us. I will not have her become the subject of water-cooler conversation or portrayed in even a slightly unfavorable or disrespectful way. You understand?” I stated in a very serious manner looking him directly in the eye. “There’s no bragging around the water cooler at work or you’ll find yourself telling your story from a hospital bed.”
“Oh yeah, yes, of course,” Dean stammered. “This is a private matter.”
“It’s also a rule,” I reminded. “And breaking the rules has very, very serious consequences. Long lasting consequences.”
I spotted her returning to the table with just the tiniest wobble in her walk, I figured the drink must have hit her when she stood up. I rose and allowed her to resume your position between her two suitors.
“Did you miss me?” she asked. Clearly, the drinks had loosened her up a bit.
“Always,” I remarked
“Absolutely,” was Dean's enthusiastic addition.
As she settled in and grabbed her drink, I replaced my hand right where it had been when she so abruptly vacated the booth.
“What did you talk about while I was gone?” she lightly inquired.
Dean said, in a very flirtatious manner, “Well, we had a bet.”
“A bet? Was it about me?” she said quizzically.
“Yes, I bet that you went to the ladies' room and that when you came back, you wouldn’t have any panties on,” Dean suggested.
“Oh, is that so?” she replied with smug curiosity. “And what does the winner get?”
“Well, if you indeed have no panties on, then I get to keep them and if you do still have them on, then he gets to take them off right here at the booth,” Dean added with a sly smile.
“Really?” she said settling back against the cushions to look at her phone and fool with something. “And am allowed no say in this?”
”Of course you do,” Dean responded. “It's up to you to settle the bet.”
My phone suddenly vibrated in my pocket and I heard Dean’s chime at basically the same time. I opened my phone expecting just another common business text. Instead, I was greeted with a very newly created image of your closely shaven, very damp, pink blossom. Glistening pink lips with just a drip of whiteish sugar drizzling downward from between the open folds, just perfect for licking or any number of other things. If there was any doubt as to whether Dean had received a similar text, his “Holy Crap” confirmed my suspicions.
I was quicker on the draw this time and my hand slid under her skirt coming to rest on your still panty cover little mound. Dean’s hand brushed by mine over her tummy and he gently tugged the strap that traversed her hip. He looked at me and admitted,
“I guess you win.”
“From the looks of my phone, I think we both did,” I said. “There has never, ever, been a better use for a cell phone…Ever,” I affirmed.
“I would absolutely agree with that,” Dean agreed, staring at his screen while fingering the waistband of her panties. My hand gently stroked her delicate panty-covered mound.
She, suppressed a tipsy little smile and simply sat back against the booth, kind of semi-aloof, sipping her drink, in an effort, I suppose, not to draw undue attention to our booth.
( This is just a bit interesting. I’m sitting here pleasantly tipsy, drinking my drink and I have not one, but TWO men competing to play Pet The Kitty…but the Kitty is getting hungry.)
“So, what about our bet?” Dean asked looking at her and smiling.
“I didn’t make any bet,” she replied, almost reaching the bottom of her second Long Island Ice Tea.
“No, I suppose you didn’t,” he said and I felt his hand squeeze your inner thigh and then he added, “But I’d really appreciate you honoring our wager.”
(Dean’s hand feels nice. I wonder how brave he is? I kind of like the race stuff. Maybe I can provide a bit more, incentive. )
She rolled her eyes, and after a pause added, “I can be good sport once in a while too,…on special occasions.”
And with that, she lifted her adorable little bottom off the bench seat just enough for both Dean and I to easily slide her little black lace panties down. They weren’t completely off, but further access had been granted. Both our hands stroked her uppermost inner thigh, separated only by her warm sugar bowl.