I pace in front of the hotel room door, repeatedly checking my appearance in the mirror on the wall. I drove for several hours to meet David here, while he’s in this city for a few days on customer calls. Insecurities now fill my head. Will he find me attractive? Will he love ‘in-person’ me as much as ‘online me?’ We believe we are in love, but can you really love someone you haven’t met in person?

Knock. Knock.

Oh, God! I inhale a deep breath and slowly open the door. Frozen in my spot, I take in the sight of him - the man I love. My, oh my, I find him so attractive. I didn't realize how much taller a six-foot-two man would be than my much shorter self. His presence is towering. Thank goodness, his face breaks into a huge smile which immediately warms me and I exhale my held breath. Stepping forward, he pulls me into his chest, enveloping me with his loving arms, squeezing out all my insecurities. I hug him tightly, afraid if I let go he will disappear. His hand lifts my chin to face him and we stare into each other's eyes for the first time.

“Hey, baby. I’m so happy to finally meet you.”

I let out an embarrassing, nervous squeal. “Forgive me. I’m very, very nervous,” I finally respond, trembling.

“Don’t be. I’ve got you,” he says hugging me tighter.

“How do you feel? Seeing me in person? Any different, David?” I ask, hoping his answer is what I want.

“You feel like I knew you would, Cassie. I feel our connection even stronger in person and know my love for you is real.”

“I love you, David,” I whisper. Thankfully, after an anxious first few minutes, I now feel comfortable in his presence - like I have known him forever.

“I love you too, Cassie.”

Then, he kisses me – the moment I have dreamed about for the last few months. It is such a soft kiss at first, pulling back to check my response. I pull his head back down, wanting more. I knew he would be a great kisser – knew it! Our tongues invade each other's mouths and our kiss grows more passionate. My hands caress his broad back and I can't help but playfully slide a hand down to squeeze one of his firm butt cheeks.

"Hey now," he says, chuckling.

Then, I feel a hard spank on my bottom. "Ouch!" I yelp, giggling.

"Turnabout is fair play and I have wanted to spank your ass for the longest time, Cassie."

We spend the next moments exploring each other with our hands. Mine across his broad shoulders and chest. His from my neck, across my shoulders, and down my arms, leaving a trail of goosebumps. We interlock our fingers and gaze upon each other, settling into this new in-person existence.

I look upon his face again and pull his head down for another delicious kiss. My moans start as passion overtakes us. Months of longing come pouring out. I feel him harden as I press against him. His hands roam to what I know is one of his favorite body parts - my nipples. With his thumbs, he caresses them to stiff peaks. I can't take it and gasp, lifting my leg to try to grind against his cock.

"Damn, you’re so hot. I’ve wanted to touch your nipples for so long," he whispers.

His fingers unbutton my blouse and slide it off my shoulders. A moment later, my bra hits the floor. I have no patience and tug on his neck, bowing his head to taste me.

"Oh, God!" I squeal as his tongue hits a nipple.

His hips push forward grinding his hard cock into my sensitive spot underneath my leggings. My leg curls around him pulling him tighter to me. As one hand pinches one nipple, his warm mouth works the other. Warmth rushes from my nipple to my pussy. It happens so quickly - I cum.

"Ahhhh!" I shriek, legs wobbling, collapsing into his arms. "David! Fuck! Fuck! Oh God, sorry, baby. Sorry. Sorry." I bury my head against his chest, embarrassed. One minute of him teasing my nipples and my pussy exploded out of nowhere.

He quietly curses, holding me up as my body still spasms. Oh my, my panties are soaked and wetting my leggings.

Lifting my chin, he says, "Do not be sorry. Ever. I am so fucking turned on that I made you cum like that, Cassie. Such a turn-on."

He hugs me tighter and I reach down and tuck at my wet leggings sticking to my crotch. His hand follows mine and I blush as he touches my wetness.

"Oh, baby," he says. "So fucking hot, you are. I am so happy I made you cum like that, but..."

"But, what?" I ask, worrying a little.

"I didn't give you permission, yet,” he says, mischievous on his face.

I smile, blushing. He continues, "So, I’m going to have to punish you, baby."

His words wet my already wet panties some more. Does he mean what I think he means? He doesn't leave me to wonder too long.

Leading me by the hand, we finally exit the hallway by the door and head towards the bed. He sits down on the edge of the bed, spreading his legs, maneuvering me to stand between them. Leaning forward, he rubs his face in between my naked breasts as I caress the back of his head.

"Bend over, baby," he says, looking up to my eyes.

I take one last look at his face, before submitting to him, bending over his leg, stretching my upper body out on the bed. His hands tug my leggings and panties down and over my feet, leaving my naked ass across his lap. He sits motionless and quiet for a few moments. I sense his anticipation over what’s about to happen. It dawns on me - this will be a first for both of us. One hand strokes my back, while the other traces light circles on my ass cheeks. I feel his hand lift off my bottom, and hold my breath.

Smack!

He hears me suck in my breath and clench my cheeks.

Smack!

"Baby," I whimper, overwhelmed by the position I am in, by the sensations, all of it.

His hand rubs my stinging ass before he spanks me again. Smack! Smack! Smack!

Oh my God, being in this vulnerable position drives me insane. I ache everywhere.

He continues spanking me, alternating ass rubs with spanks, drawing it out. The pain is definitely there, but such a good pain. Weird, I know. He pulls my hair back over my shoulder, so he can see my face – measure my responses.

“You okay, Cassie?”

“Yes. Incredible, David. It hurts, but…”

“I think I know.”

He spanks me some more, telling me he’s giving me what I need. I try to cover my ass at one point and he holds my hand against my lower back. Just a few more spanks and he stops, telling me what a good girl I am. Those words ignite so much inside me.

I raise myself off his lap and straddle him, rubbing my pussy against his hardness.

"Thank you," I whisper.

"I loved it. And love you," he responds, bowing his head to kiss me again.

“I love you too, David,” I say, in between his kisses.

I break our kiss, knowing what I want to do next. I want to give him what she wouldn't.

As I slide off his lap, onto my knees, he looks down at me. I know my blue eyes sparkle with desire as I look up at him. I unzip his pants and he raises from the bed to remove them along with his underwear. I stare at his fully erect cock and take him in hand. He loudly groans with my first touch.

“Cassie! I’m afraid I won’t last long.”

“It doesn’t matter, David. I just want to pleasure you.”

I explore his cock, touching, and then tasting every inch of him. I hope seeing my want for him turns him on the most - seeing me enjoying his cock, wanting to make him cum.

I know he's watching my mouth suck his fat cock. I use my lips and tongue to torture him. My lips stretch around his thickness, taking more and more of him in my mouth. His hips start bucking, shoving his dick down my throat. I try to hold eye contact with him as I work his cock. His scrunching face and moaning mouth tell me I’m doing a good job. I want him deeper and reach underneath him to grab his ass, helping him face-fuck me harder.

He doesn't last long before he suddenly pulls out and lifts me to his lap, commanding, "I need to be inside you now, Cassie!"

I straddle him, grinding my pussy back and forth against his cock, quickly losing control. Moaning. Aching. Needing.

He loudly groans as he leans me back, positioning his cock at my entrance.

"Do you know how many times I have dreamed of this moment? Do you?" he says, voice gruff and cracking a little.

He gently cups my face as he pushes his cock inside me.

"Oh, David, you feel good," I gasp, as he fills me completely.

We rock back and forth, connected, not wanting to pull out even for a second.

Then, I rise and slam back down on him, squeezing as my undulations begin. His hands cup my face, holding my gaze to him. We fuck hard, moaning in each other’s mouths as we kiss. My orgasm rises again as I increase my bobs.

“David, I’m cummi-“

My body explodes around him, soaking his lap. He lifts his hips and thrusts two more times, burying his cock so deeply within me, then growls out his own orgasm. His cock still inside me, we ease back into our original rocking motion, holding each other throughout our tremors. Heaven! I am in Heaven with him!

I finally rise off him and collapse face-down on the bed beside him. His body quickly covers mine, and I feel his softening cock nestling against the valley between my cheeks. His lips softly peck my cheeks while he whispers words of love and desire in my ears. Eventually, we move toward the top of the bed and slide underneath the covers, tangling our appendages together, whispering our feelings to each other. So intimate!

We lie like this for quite some time, relishing in our warm, entwined bodies, and sharing feelings about our lovemaking and each other. He presses his forehead to mine, studying my eyes, and hopefully what's behind them. Then, he kisses me. It's such a soft, unhurried kiss this time.

His hands caress my breasts in the most delightful way, while his mouth nibbles my ear, driving me crazy. This is a more sensual side he shows me now and I am loving the varying sides to his lovemaking.

And he whispers to me, asking what I want him to do to me. I feel secure revealing my desire to have him between my legs. His hands and mouth ignite a path from my neck to my pussy, stroking, kissing, nibbling. I try to grab his rigid cock and he bats my hand away, telling me I have to wait. Oh my goodness, my arousal reaches never-before-felt heights by his skilled hands and mouth.

I want this feeling to last forever and try to focus on every moment – where his hands are – where his mouth is. It's hard to stay focused when his touches send me spiraling into another realm of consciousness.

He separates my legs and settles between them, with his face disappearing from my sight. Bending my legs up to where my feet rest flat on the bed, my most private part opens for him. His first kiss between my legs makes me arch my back in ecstasy. His hands press on my tummy to settle me back down.

Inhaling deep enough for me to hear, he whispers, "You smell so good."

After planting a few kisses between my legs, he adds, "And you taste so good."

"David, that feels amazing to me," I respond, raising my head to watch him.

"Lie back and enjoy, baby."

I take a few deep breaths as he kisses my quivering pussy. He works his tongue inside causing me to cry out.

"Oh. Oh," I whimper.

I reach my hand down and pat his head. One of his hands unclasps my thigh to hold my hand, reassuring me with his squeezes.

As his tongue flicks and delves inside my pussy, my body jerks. Oh, God! He releases my hand and grabs my ass, pulling me hard against his mouth. Oh, God! He eats me with vigor and my climax is already building. Withdrawing his tongue from my pussy, he finds my sensitive clit.

"That... that feels incredible!" I moan, jerking with each lick. The tingling intensifies exponentially with each lick, craving his tongue's return.

His hands massage my bottom and separate my cheeks. One of his fingers strokes around my puckered asshole, which shocks me. We never talked about anal stimulation before.

"Honey! Honey!" I cry out as my hips buck up.

I wish I could see his face, hear what he's thinking as he pleasures me.

"David!" I cry, feeling a flood of sensations raging between my legs, racing towards my orgasm.

His tongue continues to flick and lick my hot spot, increasing his intensity, as his fingers slide in and out my pussy.

"Oh, God! Oh, God!" I scream as he finger-fucks me harder.

Then, my bucking stops as my body explodes. Waves of pleasure tumble from my tummy through my pussy. He swiftly moves up to hold me tightly against him as I ride out my orgasm. When he kisses me, I taste myself on his lips. Another very intimate moment!

Recovering from my orgasm, I notice his hardness pressing against my tummy. He is ready to fuck again.

"Take me, baby," I moan, rolling away from him onto my tummy. I push up on my knees and my eyes beckon him as I glance over my shoulder.

"Damn, you’re sexy," he says, moving behind me.

In the next moment, I feel his hard cock slide into my still-wet pussy. In and out. In and out. This is going to be a rough fuck, I can tell. He is very excited and needs to cum. I eagerly meet each of his thrusts, showing him how much I want to make him cum.

I hear his balls smacking me, mixing in with our grunts. God, his cock feels good. I squeeze my ass, tightening my pussy around him.

"Fuck, you feel good!" he yells. He feels my pussy-hugs.

Smack! Smack! Smack! He spanks my ass, eliciting squeals from me.

"David! Fuck me harder!"

"Like this, baby?" he says, thrusting deeper.

"Yes! Faster! David, faster!"

He fucks me so hard I grasp the sheets, trying to stop my forward movement. He's about to ram me into the headboard.

"I'm cumming," he growls.

I feel it. His warm seed squirting inside me. I can't help but grunt with him on his last few thrusts. Spent, he collapses on top of me, mashing us both into the mattress. His breath pants in my ear as his hands cover mine, squeezing them till my fingers turn white.

We get no sleep tonight, fully exploring each other. We try every position. No part of our bodies is left unexplored. Finally, we shower together, cleansing each other, snuggling under the warm water stream. I don't want these feelings to end. He says he doesn’t want them to end either. So, what now?

~~~

Tears wet my cheeks as I hit 'Save' and close my laptop. Maybe the scene I just described will be published someday and maybe it won’t. What happened with us, you ask? Well, neither of us could go through with it. As odd as this sounds, my love for him kept me from having probably the best sex of my life with him. I couldn’t make him a cheater. And he couldn't not do the right thing for his family and me.

He knew if we made love, our attachment to each other would grow exponentially. I wanted more than to be a man’s mistress or an online lover. I knew I deserved more. He wanted more for me too - things he knew he couldn’t give right now. Ultimately, he wasn’t ready to leave his current life yet.

We tried to pull back to friends, but it grew too painful for us both. We decided it would be best if we distanced ourselves from each other. To say this was hard is the understatement of my life. I tried not to message him, but checked my phone every few minutes the first week, hoping he would cave. We ended up checking in on each other about once a week for a while and gradually it extended to bi-monthly check-ins.

We both suffered the loss of each other, but eventually, found a place of happiness and gratitude for having met and fallen in love. I know he is there if I ever need him. He knows the same. We pray for each other's happiness and well-being. No regrets. I count myself lucky to be able to say I am in love with a great man and he returns my love.

I have wrecked my mind with thoughts of “what if.” My conclusion is there was no happy ending for us. If we were both in unhappy marriages, we would probably still be enjoying our cyber relationship. If we were both single, we would probably be dating in-person right now. But, it just doesn’t work when one is limited in what he can give and the other wants it all. Throw in a conscious on both sides and it really doesn’t end happily-ever-after.

So, after nursing my broken heart for a while, I decide to re-engage in dating sights, although, it’s different this time. These men had better understand the high standard set by David! I know what the real thing feels like now. Of course, there will not be another man like him, but I still have hope there are more men out there who will understand me, see my gifts, and love me. Until then, I will continue writing and making online friends but will keep some distance from now on. I know online love gets too tangled for me.