Quote by Guest
I have masturbated to wake myself up, I have masturbated to release some tension, I have masturbated to kill some time, I have masturbated to wallow in my fantasies, I have masturbated to experiment with many different things, I have masturbated to arouse my boyfriend...

So sure, I have masturbated to fall asleep too. Is there a single occasion that isn't appropriate to masturbate? Okay, while the parents are visiting or while doing the groceries might be two obvious exceptions.

Quote by simplyjohn
Two major events occurred for me yesterday. This award and something very unpleasant which has now been resolved and I am home as of 30 minutes ago.

The timing of the award could not have been better since it very much lifted my spirits and helped me endure the other event I mention and so a huge thank you to Nicola for the award and as I say the timing.

A big thank you also to everyone who has very kindly posted their good wishes.

Now... I have never driven a left-hand vehicle, it would take me ages to drink a full pint of any liquid since I am a 'small build' and have a very small abdominal capacity, and lastly I spilt beer on my last keyboard… nothing else.

Thank you to everyone once again.

John.

Quote by Beffer
None of this will matter 300 years from now.

Quote by _chica_
how to start...

being that it is the Project Semi Colon, I hope this does not give some here a license to mock and ridicule others... or use this against them in any shape way or form.

It is 3 am... Sleep eludes me... my head hurts ... my tears are flowing...

I am depressed, stressed, and with no end in site...
I moved back to TX... I take care of my ill aunt.. along side dealing with my son's autism...
All this after dealing with cancer... and other health issues that I care not to share...

I suffer PTSD... but to many I am the pillar of strength and when I show a little weakness...
they return with you can handle it.... you are strong... yaddy yadda...
I am so sick of being the one most around me turn to... I am tired of crying in the pillow...
I want to scream... but I am drowning in this ...

No Im not suicidal... been there... but I realize others truly need me (my son)
but I feel tired of being the strength or light ...
Funny when I feel like this I tend to punish myself even more... be i by separating myself from others... or by allowing myself to be torn down to the point of not wanting to get out of bed.
to look at the clock and wait to the last minute to do things for others and just forget about me...

Therapy... yes I have taken it...
Drugs... I taken them by the dozen...

Do I talk to those around me about this...NO
and here... at first it was ok to talk to some... but they only use things like this against you in this site... many do... and that drives me to leave time and time again... so now it is hard to really trust anyone...

so why am I writing... because I have nothing else to loose here...
truly I dont and it is a way for me to vent with out my family or close ones really knowing any of it...
So they can continue thinking what they always thought of me...

all done...

Quote by AmeliaLeigh
Happiness is ...
Surviving depression
Conquering Anxiety
Loving and being loved unconditionally
Being a mother and wife
Happiness is whatever makes you the happiest

Quote by AmeliaLeigh
I am hoping the Red Sox win again tonight!! Last night was freaking AWESOME!!

Quote by kiera
I am wondering why I am awake this early on a Sunday

Quote by kiera
Hey everyone, how are you all?

I had a bit of a rough week.

I got pulled aside by Giorgia's teacher last week, just to give me a heads up that the class had been asked to write about a memory for their school play, which is tomorrow. She said Giorgia was writing about her dad. Giorgia's a bit like me when it comes to talking, she can write it, she's always been a good writer, she's not much of a talker though. I asked her what exactly it was she was writing about, and she said the day you told me he died and his funeral. On Thursday I asked her teacher if I could see it. To say it was heartbreaking to read would be an understatement. It's so well written but to hear it all in her own words, how shocked she was when I told her, how she felt when she saw his coffin pull up at the funeral. How she broke down at the end (and she did, she did not cry once at the funeral until the end) and how it felt to say her final goodbye to her dad before I picked her up and took her outside. It was just so fucking good, her writing is amazing, and yet devastating at the same time I couldn't stop crying.

It's had me questioning some things. Should I have prepared them better? Would it have been less of a shock, because she was completely shocked, had not seen it coming and yet, at the time I thought I was preparing them for what was to come? Should I have told them before he died that he was going to, that it was only a machine keeping him alive? At the time I felt giving them one set of awful news was better than them living like I was daily for a month waiting for the phone call to say he was gone. Or worse, that they would ask to see him. They had been given permission, but I could barely handle seeing him strapped up in ICU to all those machines. I didn't want that to be their last memory of him. Their last memory isn't great tbh, but at least it's not a scary one like that. I know I can't change it, but I have been upset and questioning myself. She has to read it out in her assembly tomorrow, that's going to be hard because I will cry my eyes out again and people will think it's ok to come and invade my personal space again. I don't fucking like strangers coming up and thinking it's ok to touch me, I know it's just a hug, but I don't like it.

I've been upset and on edge since. I had a family party in Oxford on Saturday. I haven't seen these people in a really long time. They have kids the same age as mine, and my Uncle came over from Spain for it so I said I would go. I manage pretty well these days, and anytime I get anxious if I have to be around a lot of people I just remind myself mentally of the hundreds of times I've done it since Paul died and been fine. I was so anxious about going on Saturday and got myself really upset; I didn't want to go, a big shout out to Rach and LYFBUZ for being online to talk to me and calm me down because I don't think I could have left if they hadn't. That would have been a shame, and I would have been so ashamed of myself. We ended up having such a great time, the kids had a fantastic time with their cousins, and it was so good to see my own again. I was worrying over nothing, I knew that, but sometimes it doesn't mean shit. But anyway, I prevailed again but I haven't been that anxious in a really long time, and I think it's all connected to me feeling low about what Giorgia wrote.

I still don't feel like myself; I had to speak to her teacher again yesterday to discuss the assembly tomorrow. I'm going to have to sit there and listen to her read it out to the entire school and some parents. She puts me to shame, you know? She is so brave to write about something so personal, let alone be willing to get up and share it to the entire school to help raise awareness. Because there isn't enough awareness. That school could not have been more ill-prepared for what happened to us, and they made everything so much worse because of it. Tomorrow is going to be really hard emotionally, I just feel down atm. But also so very very proud of her. I'm making Paul's parents come with me so at least I won't be completely alone listening to that, and I have read it which helps. I can't imagine my reaction if I'd gone to this assembly not knowing what she was going to say, I was devastated enough reading it in private.

Anyway, hopefully, I will feel better after this is over. Just to let you all know too, this piece of writing rocked, it's so good. She got a ton of house points and recognition for it. She's the only child who's been asked to read their entire piece out tomorrow, the others only get to read a small part. I am as always incredibly proud of her.

I think that's enough for now. Sorry, it's so long.

Love to you all xo

Quote by Kavyansh01
My beautiful 42 year old daughter had a large growth surgically removed from her anus ten days ago, and has learnt today that she has stage 2 anal squamous cell carcinoma. She will he sent for CT, PET and MRI scans to determine whether it has spread to her lymph nodes, hopefully fairly soon, and after that will start a combined course of chemotherapy and radiotherapy. We are fortunate that we live in Manchester with one of the two specialist cancer treatment hospitals in the UK, and that under the NHS the treatment will be free.

As a family we are still in a state of shock, but we are very close and will give her all the love and support she needs over the next few weeks and months.

I think that a large bottle of your best malt whisky is what I need at the moment, thank you barman, and of course, your prayers.

Quote by NOLAHotGal


It's not a dream.

Brandie

Quote by Beffer



Hey! If I ever get Emma Watson, she's MINE, buster!

Quote by GraceW


Kissing your fanny until your mood changes