There are a lot of interesting things to see when browsing the internet for sex toys. Most of what I saw resembled familiar human genitals, but some items were built for King Kong, while others appeared to be stolen off the set of a sci-fi movie. In addition to a variety of gizmos from the friendly to the frightening, there were instructions, recommendations, warnings and customer testimonials to provide more confusion than clarity.

I was eager for a second opinion by the time Izzy knocked on my apartment door. Upon entry, she asked, “Looking at porn again?”

“Well, sort of.”

She perked up, “I wanna see,” and looked at the computer monitor. “What the hell is that thing?”

She pointed at a contraption that looked like a dildo attached to the drive shaft of a sports car. I hoped she didn’t expect me to buy one. I wanted something to facilitate sexual pleasure without eliminating my role entirely. I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve seen a lot of those today.”

“Well, don’t let ‘em in the house.”

She reassured me that it wasn’t going to invade my position in the bedroom, so I offered, “I thought we could get something a little more subtle to enhance my sexual performance. What do you think?”

She was quick to agree, which I tried not to take as an insult. After a minute of scrolling, pointing, shaking her head, and scowling, she said, “Some of this stuff ain’t cheap.”

“I’m not concerned about money. I want you to be happy.”

She smiled at my consideration. “Okay, but we’re not going to learn anything this way. We need to see these things in the real world so we know exactly what we’re getting.”

I stared at her.

“You’re okay with that, aren’t you?” she prompted.

“I don’t know. What would this involve?”

She explained it to me. “There’s a sex shop just a few doors down from where I work. We need to go there and check some stuff out for ourselves.”

“I don’t know if I can trust the people there.”

“Trust ‘em to do what? They won’t bite.”

I looked suspicious.

“Or if they do bite, you’ll like it.” She grabbed my hand, “C’mon.”

A casual stroll to the sex shop was a chance to get out in the pleasant summer weather. Our neighborhood exuded an “Old town, New energy” vibe, where abandoned warehouses converted to modern dwellings attracted young couples and college residents.

Perky patrons sat outside the coffee shop, sipping and laughing under a canopy. Most of them recognized Izzy as we walked by and smiled like they knew a secret. Peep, surrounded by a gaggle of groupies, didn’t miss a beat. He flashed a one-finger wave and a coy smile, watched us curiously for a moment, then continued flattering his admirers.

I reluctantly opened the door to Erotic Commodities. The name wasn’t promising, but it wasn’t the dank dungeon I expected, nor was I surrounded by drooling, grunting perverts prepared to attack. The shop looked more like a bookstore, but displayed mannequins wearing leather harnesses, VHS and DVD videos for those who hadn’t discovered the internet, and a wide variety of sex devices.

Izzy picked up some alarmingly large items, but ultimately preferred more average specimens. I was at ease with dildos and butt plugs, but multi-function devices perplexed me. You’d think with a name like Rocket, I’d be comfortable with buttons and switches, but I didn’t want a porn android taking over the bedroom.

The young, attractive shopkeepers conducted themselves like professionals, offering friendly advice about lubrication and smiling like they might join us as we left the store. One way Erotic Commodities were guaranteed to take your money was through sexual exposure by a beautiful, physically fit sales staff. I imagined they took long lunch breaks.

§

Some of our new toys required two hours of charging, which is an eternity when you’re boiling over with lust. We found a movie to fill the void and tried to sit patiently. Izzy didn’t protest when I yawned and stretched my arm around her shoulders, slipping my hand down her shirt. She turned to me and planted her hand on the desperate bulge in my pants.

We maintained control through the opening credits before completely losing the plot. We had achieved maximum “fuck me!” status when the movie reached a dramatic scene. I asked Izzy, “Can we turn this off? We watched none of it so far; I see no reason to watch none of the rest of it.”

She agreed. Straining to grab the remote, I bumped it off the coffee table, out of reach. Izzy shrugged, and we commenced making out and stripping on the couch until my phone alarm rang. I quickly jumped up, grabbed the remote from the floor to silence the TV, and led Izzy to the bedroom by the hand.

We stood beside the bed, and I took off Izzy's bra, moved behind her, and cupped my hands around her breasts. I licked her shoulders and pressed her panties down her thighs. As they fell free and landed on the floor, she crawled into bed and lay on her side, propped by her elbow, and watched while I rapidly removed the rest of my clothes.

I picked up the Rocket Rider, an average-sized device chosen by Izzy for its name, and coated it with lube. I flipped a switch on the side, but it shot out of my hand, thumped against the headboard, and lay buzzing between the mattress and a pillow. I climbed into bed and winked at Izzy like nothing happened.

I grabbed the Rocket Rider again, and it jiggled my arm, shaking and snarling like an angry pit bull. I wiped the excess lube on the bed sheets and switched it to the lowest setting, but it escaped my grasp, this time landing on Izzy’s pillow next to her arm. Her eyes widened. "Damn, Rocket, try not to put an eye out before you have a chance to read the instructions."

I wasn’t convinced these toys were worth the trouble and wished I had bigger fingers instead. Izzy rolled onto her back, and I took the Majestic Masseuse, a large external massager, in my right hand and pressed the oscillating head to her clitoris. I rubbed oil between her thighs with my left hand and spread her labia with my fingers. I felt her clitoris vibrate as I pressed my tongue into her pussy.

I moistened her anus with my middle finger and eased it into her as a mix of oil and natural lubricants glazed my lips. Her body rocked the bed with increasing intensity. She rolled her head back, raising her breasts and lifting her body. She moaned in ecstasy, her legs shivering and squeezing me as she approached an intense orgasm. Her fingernails clawed my hair – her stomach trembled – her pussy pumped in my mouth. I put my arms around her and held her until her body relaxed.

Izzy whispered, “I want to feel you between my breasts.”

I straddled her as she rubbed oil over her chest. A smooth sensation shot through me as I settled my cock between her breasts, thrusting and growing stiffer with each stroke. She rubbed oil on the Rocket Rider – her stomach tensed, and eyes squeezed shut as she inserted it into her body. She lay her hand over my cock and pressed into her chest. I didn’t want to finish too quickly, so I lifted myself to my knees.

She sat up, stroked my cock as she moved closer, and slipped her lips around it. Her hand cupped my balls as her mouth sunk deeper, tongue slithering around my skin. She removed the Rocket Rider, and a buzz rushed through me as she held it under my cock. I ran my fingers through her hair and said, “I want to fuck you so hard.” Smiling at my uncharacteristic request, she set the Rocket Rider on the bed and lay on her back, arms to her sides.

I lubricated the Butt Bullet, and she lifted her legs over my shoulders. I twisted and pressed the plug, slowly penetrating her with a steady motion. Her breath increased – she groaned from the tight penetration – her anus tightened around it in pulsing waves until the base touched her body.

As I pressed my cock into her, the plug rolled against me through her delicate skin. The strong grip of double penetration and ecstasy on Izzy’s face brought new levels of fulfillment. She crossed her feet behind my head and pulled me closer. ­ Lubrication from her breasts rubbed between us as we rolled back and forth – our bodies stiffened – I whispered, “I want to cum on your body.”

I pulled out – Izzy held my cock, gasping as streams of semen shot across her body. My cock twitched in her hand – cum trickled down her arm as she rolled her thumb, coaxing the last few drops. When my knees stopped shaking, I settled beside her.

§

I lay gazing at the ceiling, recalling how we spent our day. “I enjoyed shopping with you earlier. It was an adventure.”

“I’m glad you’re open to new experiences.”

“I want to try something else. I want to give you a key to my apartment so you can stop by after late nights.”

Izzy looked uncertain. “Doesn’t that violate some kind of bro code?”

“I’m too old for frat boy rules. Besides, I used to live with a woman, so I know what to expect.”

“All women aren’t the same; you should realize that. And we see where it got you.”

“It brought you and me together. The rest is a mystery to unfold together.”

I was afraid I overplayed my position. I assured Izzy, “It’s up to you. I don’t want to take away your independence.”

Izzy shrugged. “What the hell. If we’re old enough to play with adult toys, we’re old enough to act like adults.”

I was shaken by her remark. “I wouldn’t go that far. I still want to have fun.”

Izzy bit her lip. “Trust me, we will.”

With that, I lay on my back, dreaming about the future. Izzy lay her head on my chest and squeezed her arms around me. I couldn’t have hoped for a more perfect evening together. The only distraction was the Rocket Rider still buzzing in the corner of the bed.