I was invigorated as I woke on Friday morning after, what I felt was, a successful session on the training pitch. It was a great feeling to start the day. It was tempered, slightly, by the looming horizon of a first date with a beautiful woman and the fear that I might make myself look like a complete fucking idiot.

So it was, in this twilight humour, that I set off for work, my stomach in a confused knot of triumph, on the one hand, and apprehension, on the other. It still couldn't prevent a smile crossing my face as I started the car for the trip to work.

I was working on a speculative retail storage park for a builder we had been involved with since Moses was a boy. It was a cookie cutter type site with every warehouse and office unit identical to the next, save for those that were larger. It was a handy number and we got a lot of price work, which meant we could earn some serious shekels. Everybody knew everybody and we usually had a good laugh at break times. This was in the days when the boss delivered wage packets to the site. Our boss, Dave Ruane, was no exception, except he'd wait until fifteen minutes before the whistle to drive in the gate. He got out of his car and strolled over to where we were packing the gear away. He was a good looking bastard, I think I even fancied him myself, and was very likeable.

"Caldwell, are you coming for a few pints?" he shouted across to me, as he distributed wage packets to the lads.

"I can't tonight, Dave," I said, trying to think of something that wasn't a date.

"I knew you wouldn't, I just didn't want to make you think I wasn't talking to you," he said with a smile.

"Thanks. I knew that."

"I was talking to a guy called Gary Penrose last night. He said he knows you."

"But do any of us really know any of the rest of us deep down, Dave?"

"Probably not, but why would we want to?"

"I know Gary Penrose. We played for Bohs together."

"Yes, he said that. He asked me to give you his number," he fished a card out of his jacket pocket and handed it to me, "he said to give him a call."

"Ok."

"By the way, there's a triple unit going up across the road. It's for a client, so it's a proper job, hallelujah. Will you do it on a price?"

"Sure, how much is the price?"

"Same as usual for a double unit and add fifty percent for the third section."

"So the spec unit is on price and the fit out is separate?"

"Yeah, I doubt we could make it all work on price, Derek," he said, and he was right.

"Ok, I'll do it if we get the next two smaller ones on price too. After all, Dave, Christmas is only around the corner."

"Well there's plenty of them to be done and it's handy for you out here."

"Great, when is it to start?"

"Two weeks or so,” he inclined his head, for me to follow him.

We walked over to his car as he handed me my pay packet.

“How’re things, Derek? You look a bit different today.”

“It’s probably this new soap I’m using.”

“Your demeanour is different. Are you holding on?”

“Yes. I’m good, nothing negative, Dave. Gary dragged me in to coaching his team,” I said, nervously.

“It’s about time you got involved somewhere. I’m happy for you, Derek. Just don’t get in too deep.”

"Unfortunately, Dave, there can't be any half measures."

"Yeah, and that's the problem for you, Derek. It's worse than alcohol."

"I know, but I think I can manage it. I was fine while I was involved, Dave. The trouble began when I had to stop."

"I suppose there was that, and I understand where you're coming from. Does Artie know?"

"Charlie told him. The kids are excited about it, they don't know about my past."

"You'll have to tell them, Derek, for fuck sake!"

"I'd imagine that the ex will have told them at this stage. She arrived over at training and told me I was reliving my youth, or something encouraging like that. I don't really listen to it any more."

"She's had a lot to deal with."

"Not really, Dave. She never had to live in the real world."

"I mean with you and the drink."

"I know, but it's not a cakewalk for me either. Here, while I have you. How about a bit of sponsorship for the Super Eights?"

"What do you need?"

"I'll let you know, I don't know what we have yet."

"Remind me, I'd be happy to. Do I get my name on the front of the gear?"

"No."

"It's always the same with you, isn't it?"

"That's the way it has to be, Dave. There can only be one leader.”

I got home from work early and fished Eva’s number out of my pocket. She answered on the third ring.

“Hey there, lovely lady.”

“Derek! I was just thinking about you.”

“Nothing good, I hope.”

“Nothing but good. You know, it’s nice to have a gentleman to think about for once.”

“I know what you mean, Eva. I mean, when I say that, I mean about a woman. Shit!”

She laughed.

“Are you nervous? You sound nervous,” she said.

“No, I’m not nervous. I think catatonic would be a better description for it.”

“In truth, I haven’t been able to eat a thing all day. My stomach is in turmoil.”

“Hence my call.”

“You’re not cancelling on me, are you?”

“No. No way. I’ve simply been doing what I always do to mess things up.”

“What’s that?”

“Overthinking,” I said, disgusted with myself.

“I don’t understand, Derek.”

“Well, I just, bear with me for a second, ok? I was just thinking about tonight and I feel that I may have pressurised you into something that you were too nice to disagree with.”

“Go on,” she said quietly.

“So I’m giving you an alternative option, Eva. I can offer to take you out to Il Corvo for dinner. We can dress up and all that stuff and it will be a nice first date, so to speak. The original plan is still very much on the table, but I thought I’d give you the option, if you felt you’d like a second one.”

“I was looking forward to sitting in your music chair again, replete with your famous spaghetti Bolognese and a glass or two of wine.”

“I also got a Tiramisu from Il Forneo, made fresh every day.”

“Well that seals it for me, Derek. How can one compare, a meal at Il Corvo with a Tiramisu a la Forneo, at the home of an esteemed authority on Italian cuisine?”

“I’m sure I could find several ways, Eva, but I’m happy if you are. That’s all that concerns me this evening.”

“I’m happy with the original idea, I’ve been happy with it since I went to sleep last night.”

“Good, that’d be my choice too, Eva. Come when you’re ready. I can’t wait to see you.”

“I’ll be an hour or so.”

I hung up the phone as Billy walked up to the door. I opened it before he got a chance to knock.

“Come in, Billy, I’m just making some food.”

“What are we having?”

“Salmon Du Boir. It’s an old family recipe.”

“It looks like minced beef to me.”

“Doesn’t everything? What’s up?”

“I hear you put on a bit of a show last night.”

“No, not really. It’s called coaching by example.”

“Did it work?”

“You tell me. Three headed goals scored by eight year olds from play.”

“Yes, I was told that you had them purring.”

“I enjoyed it, I even got another new player. He plays for the school. Barry Clery, do you know him?”

“Yes, his mother is Eva? Nice looking girl, split up with her husband?”

“Yes.”

“Did you sign him? He’s a good little centre half.”

“She came around with his birth cert last night and I gave her the form to sign. It looks ok. So what do you need, Billy?”

“There’s a league meeting on Monday night about a small sided league they want to instigate for the little ones. It might be a good idea if you went to it.”

“Where is it?”

“The league offices in Capel Street.”

“Are you going?”

“No, I have a meeting.”

“Are you ok?”

“Yeah, just a bit shaky by times.”

“You can call here anytime. You know that, don’t you?”

“I do, yes. Thanks,” he said, “I could use a coffee.”

“You know where everything is.”

“Are you ever going to make me a miserable bleeding’ cup of coffee?”

“Shut up and make it if you want it. Do you think Paddy will come in with me? I don’t know the ropes in there.”

“Try and stop him, he’d do anything to get out of that house sometimes.”

“I’ll give him a bell and set it up.”

“Grand! I’d better make tracks before my little box of rattlesnakes sends out a search party for me. You’ll have to owe me that coffee.”

I called Paddy when Billy left. A female voice answered.

“Hi, I’m looking for Mr. B please.”

“He’s not here, can I tell him who called?”

“Are you Mrs. B?”

“No, I’m Margaret.”

“You’re one of the little Bs then?”

“Who’s this?”

“Derek Caldwell is my name, can you get him to give me a call please, Margaret?”

“Does he have your number?”

“I think I gave it to him alright.”

“Call it out and I’ll write it down, just in case.”

I gave her the number, thanked her and hung up. I spent the next short while chopping tomatoes, onions and garlic while the meat browned off in the pan. I had just completed everything and placed the pot on to cook it through when Eva arrived at the door. I opened the door to her smiling face.

“Hi there, Eva. You look nice.”

“This old thing? No, I only wore this so that my neighbours wouldn’t be suspicious. I have a change of clothes in my bag, if you have somewhere I can change, Derek.”

I laughed.

“Yes, of course. You can use anywhere you wish, I’ll be in the kitchen arguing with my sauce.”

“Thanks, I’ll use the music room.”

She reached up and kissed me, blushed and disappeared through the door while I returned to the kitchen. I busied myself at the cooker, stirring the sauce and testing the seasoning and was fully focused on the food not sticking to the bottom of the pot. It had just hit its boiling point and I had reduced it to a gentle simmer when I remembered that I had a visitor. I went to see if she was alright. I didn't want her to feel that I was stalking her, so I simply stuck my head out of the kitchen door and called her.

"Eva? Are you okay? Do you need anything?"

"Sorry, Derek. Yes I'm good, thanks. I'll be just another few minutes."

I returned to my work and was just about finished when I got a tap on the shoulder. When I turned around, Eva was standing there, dressed in a black, square neck, ruched, midi dress with a split to mid-thigh. I was knocked out by her beauty. I could only stare with opened mouth at her. Not a hair out of place or a blemish on her skin, a sweet smile on her lips that she had applied a light pink colour to. I took her hand and kissed her palm,

"You look spectacular, Eva. You're putting me to shame."

"Thank you, Derek, I'm sorry about the delay. I brought two dresses because I wasn't sure which one would be better. I hope it's not over the top, I just wanted to make a good impression."

I pulled her to me and kissed her. She smiled a warm and happy smile.

"How long is dinner?" she asked with a curious smile.

"It's a sauce that needs as much time as you can give it, Eva. It can be ten minutes or ten hours. In Italy, they average somewhere between 2 and 4 hours to simmer a Ragu."

"Do you need to stand over it for all that time?"

"No, to be honest, I was doing it to keep occupied and help to quell my nerves."

"I knew you were nervous on the phone today," she whispered, and kissed me, "are you still nervous?"

"Even more so," I whispered into her mouth.

"Why?"

"Because I am outclassed."

"By a black dress?"

"Not just the dress, Eva. You are the complete package."

She hugged me tighter and we kissed again, deeper this time. I felt myself fall into her soul as our lips moved effortlessly together. Our mouths were hungry for each other, our lips wanted only to linger on each other's, our tongues slowly danced in each others mouths, taste each other's lips. Our breath synchronised to accommodate a longer and deeper connection, pulling us into our own orbit, away from where we stood, to a different plane. She left the kiss and switched the cooker off.

Wordlessly, she looked into my eyes, took my hand and led me upstairs to my bedroom. We kissed again, this time with more hunger, with greater need. Her fingers ran through my hair and mine explored her bare shoulders, left exposed by the design of her dress. The dress itself was soft and smooth and the zipper worked perfectly as I zipped it open to the sound of a melodic little sigh from her throat. Her lip movements increased in tempo as mine worked to keep up with her. I slipped her dress from her shoulders and held it as she stepped out of it.

Not wishing it to land in a heap on the floor, I folded it and placed it on a leather chair that I used for reading when I couldn't sleep at night. She was naked save for a small white lace thong which I only caught a brief glimpse of as she descended on me with her lips, lifting my shirt over my head and attempting to undo my belt and jeans in the same movement. I assisted her and soon I was naked, with this angel clinging to my naked skin, our lips hopelessly addicted to each other.

I slipped my hands under the waistband of her thong and it slid deliciously from her spectacularly constructed bum, down over her legs and onto the floor. As it travelled downwards, she demurely bent her legs at the knees and found a position on the side of the bed, taking my hand with her as she lay down fully while I scrambled to join her.

We locked each other into a sensual embrace using the touch and feel of our skin to heighten stimulation and eroticism. Her eyes shone in nervous anticipation.

“I want you, Eva. I’m nervous, excited but my need for you is huge. What do you enjoy, sexually?” I whispered.

“I’m more nervous, Derek. I’m not what you’d call experienced. It was pretty much wham, bam, go to sleep ma'am, with my ex.”

“I love giving and receiving oral, is that something you enjoy?”

“I’ve never had it, Derek.”

“Would you trust me enough to try it?”

“Yes, I would. If I’m doing something wrong please tell me.”

“Same here, if you’re not comfortable or I’m doing something you’re unsure about, just say stop.”

“I will.”

I leaned up on my elbow and kissed her, she held my face in her hands and returned the kiss. My hand went to explore her breasts, her nipples were hard and very extended. I dropped my lips to one and suckled on it gently, a sensual sigh emanating from within her.

My hand stroked the nipple of her other breast as my tongue massaged the top of the one between my lips and she clung on to the back of my head with her hands. I moved my hand to her stomach and stroked the sides of her hip, returning to the spot just above her neatly trimmed bush. It was soft and full, my fingers lingering there, wallowing in her femininity.

Further down, I found the softness of her inner thigh, slowly allowing my hand travel inside and around as it approached her vulva retreating immediately as her hips fell and rose in expectation and excruciating temptation. I then brought my hand back up her inner thing as far as it could travel without touching her vulva.

Rather than retreat, this time I allowed it move inside her thigh and around to her rear, gently touching her inner buttock, squeezing it softly and returning just below her vulva again. My thumb flicked outward and touched her as it passed. Dampness from her vulva became attached to my skin. Her hips rose at my touch, followed by a lascivious groan from deep in her throat.

I kissed down her lower stomach as her head arced back, in anticipation of something she couldn’t predict, on the pillow. I continued my kisses, accompanied by touches from my tongue, down to a soft place just inside her thigh, close to her vagina. I kissed her on the skin just to the left of her vulva, softly massaging the area with the flat surface of my tongue.

An agonised moan, “Oh my God, Derek,” escaped her lips as she arched her back, lifting her hips above me, in search of my touch. As her hips descended I reached out with my tongue and touched the soft pink flesh of her labia. She almost hissed at my touch.

I parted her legs to expose her flower-shaped vulva as it glistened in the evening light. I kissed inside her lips, just above her vagina, dipped the very tip of my tongue inside her and then let it slowly travel upwards to discover her aroused clitoris as it sought stimulation.

I didn’t disappoint, I enveloped it in a soft tongue, flicking it gently as her hip motions sped up a little. She was rotating her hips, all the while pulling my lips and tongue into her body, searching for the perfect connection, weight and strength of touch. I increased my tongue movements as her breath and a soft keening rose in volume.

As her hip movement became higher and more erotic, I placed one finger inside her and quickly found her G Spot, which I massaged in time to the movements of her hips and my tongue. Her back arched again, her hips crashed back on the bed and her eyes were tightly shut as a piercing scream left her mouth when the earthquake hit.

Her legs, knees, hips and stomach quivered as her orgasm coursed through her, my face was completely covered in her excreted fluid as I held my position, my tongue, finger and lips motionless as she journeyed out the other side, eventually settling back down and crying out for me to hold her.

I quickly moved to be with her, this wonderful, beautiful woman, this sensual, sexy, angel. Her lips attacked mine in a kiss of complete attachment. Unspoken promises made and accepted. Her eyes opened and I dried her tears, tears of ecstasy, tears of joy, tears of awakening and a looming understanding of what was gone and what was possible.

Our eyes locked. We needed the union of our bodies. She took my erect penis in her hand and brought me to the entrance of her vagina.

“I’m protected, Derek,” she whispered, “I need you so much right now.”

I entered her vagina, a gasp escaped her.

“Did I hurt you, Eva?” I asked.

“No. You couldn’t, Derek. Keep going. Please.”

I increased my depth and she groaned as I found her limit and mine, settling deeply inside her until she adjusted to my length. Then slowly we began to move against each other. Short gentle movements initially, becoming longer and less gentle as our arousal built and our need for release became overwhelming until, finally, I couldn’t contain myself as my climax exploded inside her, triggering her second orgasm. We held on to each other as the waves of ecstasy abated, before finally separating to escape to a cosy place in each other's arms as the darkness descended and we drifted into a beautiful postcoital bliss.

I woke in the pitch darkness, seeing nothing, as my eyes adjusted to a post sleep haze. Shortly after I noticed two pinpricks of light directly in front of me.

“Are you awake, Derek?” I heard Eva whisper.

“Eva,” I said, and touched the breast that rested against my chest.

She kissed me.

“I thought I was dreaming, but you’re really here.”

“Yes, I’m here with you,” she whispered.

“Are you awake long?”

“A few minutes, that’s all. I’m still a little high, I think.”

“I know what you mean. It’s almost like you’re standing outside yourself watching everything you’re doing.”

“Yes. Yes, that’s it. A bit removed.”

“You were amazing tonight.”

“Oh, Derek. I’m still reliving it.”

“I’m happy.”

“I came twice. I’ve never even come once.”

“I didn’t get to feed you though.”

“I haven’t even thought about it, to be honest. You, ehm, distracted me.”

“I beg your pardon, young lady, who switched my cooker off and dragged me to the bedroom?”

“You were nervous, I was simply helping to settle our nerves.”

“That’s true. Are you hungry?”

“Yes. I can eat.”

“I’ll heat the food up and we can eat.”

“Will you do something for me first?”

“Anything.”

“You said you like to give and receive oral.”

“Yes, I do.”

“You didn’t receive any and I’d like to reciprocate.”

“Would you now?”

“Yes, I would. But I don’t know how.”

“I think I find myself becoming aroused, if you’d care to check.”

She moved her hand to my hardening penis and gripped it softly in her fingers. She smiled.

“I think you’re correct. What do I do now?”

“Ok, you take the head into your mouth, that’s all it needs. You simply take it in and let it out again, use your tongue and lips only, and add a little suction from time to time.”

“Let me try it with your finger first,” she said.

I held up my finger to her.

“Is that the finger you had inside me?”

“Yes, use a different one instead.”

“No, that’s the one I want.”

She took my hand and enveloped my finger in her mouth, mimicking the act of fellatio, and doing a pretty good job of it.

“Something like that?”

“Yes, that was almost perfect, Eva.”

She smiled again, slid down under the covers and began to kiss between my legs, focusing on the area between my inner thigh and my scrotum.

“Jesus, Eva. Do that again.”

She then held the base of my penis and administered a perfect blow job, all the while stroking up and down on the shaft. I felt my climax building. I pulled her head up.

“What’s wrong, Derek?”

“I’m gonna come, Eva.”

“Great. I can’t wait to taste it.”

She resumed her task and a few minutes of blissful stimulation to the head of my penis by her beautiful talented lips and tongue brought me to a tingling, leg-thrashing climax which filled her mouth with my seed. She swallowed it quickly and then licked my penis clean before coming to me again and lying with her head on my chest as my heartbeat returned to normal once more.

“Now we can eat, Derek.”

“Typical,” I said, and we both laughed.

“Any idea what time it is?” she asked.

I peered at my watch in the darkness.

“9:45.”

“Amazing.”

“I’ll put the food on, Eva.”

“I’ll come with you, if you don’t mind.”

“I think you did already.”

She kissed me.

“Yes. I did.”

I got out of bed and held her hand as she joined me. I hunted around for something to wear but she pulled me away.

“Let’s not dress. It’ll spoil the mood.”

She didn’t want lights but we needed something to enable us to see. I had a few candles and tea lights in the kitchen so I lit a few and placed them around the place. I switched the cooker on as she went to put some music on. I smiled as she made herself at home. It warmed my heart.

The food was on to heat so I wandered into the living room to be with her. She had an album in her hand as she perused the cover. I slipped my arms around her from behind.

“Watcha doin'?” I asked.

“You have some great music here, Derek,” she said.

“I have, yet you’re looking at a compilation album.”

“Yes, that’s all I ever had. I never saw this one before.”

“What is it?”

“It’s just a white cover with an embossed heart. I don’t know what it is. There’s some tiny writing on the bottom that I can’t make out.”

“I’ve a few of those, Eva. We used to get stuff like that dropped into the club for the players all the time. I must have about twenty of them in the storage press under there. I doubt I’ve ever played most of them.”

“How do you know what’s on them?”

“I don’t. All I know is there’s a heart on that one so it must be love songs. See? It’s never even been out of the sleeve.”

“Let’s put it on. I love a mystery.”

“I’m enjoying stroking your stomach, Eva. You’re so soft and feminine.”

She spun in my arms and pulled me in for a kiss. It was as sensual and arousing a kiss as I’ve ever had. My penis began to stiffen again. I broke the kiss.

“Look what you did.”

“I’m sorry you must think I’m some kind of nympho.”

“I certainly don’t. We can do anything we want, Eva. But we need to eat first.”

I took the album from her and unsealed it. It was a plain black vinyl record with no markings save for a large A on one side and B on the other.

“I have a rule with these ones, Eva. Once it goes on, it stays on and plays right through. Deal?”

“Ooh I like that rule. Yes, yes put it on, please.”

I showed her how to work the sound system and she was wide eyed in wonder at how complicated or easy it could be. She put the needle on the record and waited with bated breath. She smiled when the first notes played.

“Don’t tell me. I know this one,” she said, as she pulled herself into me and took my arms around her stomach again.

“It’s an old one,” I whispered.

“I know I’ve heard it, tell me.”

“The Bee Gees before the squeaking. ‘Tis the Morning of my Life’,” I said.

“It’s beautiful.”

“So are you, Eva. Let’s eat.”

“Can we eat in here? With the music?”

“You like your music, don’t you?”

“I love it, Derek.”

“See that little switch on the wall beside the turntable?”

“Yes.”

“Switch it on.”

She looked at me, a curious, little-girl smile of innocence on her face.

“It won’t explode, will it?”

“You’ll find out soon enough. Switch it on.”

She turned it on and sent The Bee Gees all through the house.

“Wow! That’s amazing, Derek. Who did that for you?”

“I did it myself. I’m quite a capable electrician you know.”

I took her hand and brought her through the house into the dining room, her sense of wonder was such a turn on.

“I love this. It’s a house of music. A house of magic.”

She sat at the table and I served her food, she pulled her chair over beside mine and leaned into me as we ate.

“You are hungry, young lady.”

“I haven’t eaten a thing all day, Derek. Is there any more?”

“I only know how to make enough for a battalion of soldiers. There’s always more.”

I brought a serving bowl to the table, it was full of Spag Bol. She dug in.

“It’s really good. Can I have the recipe?”

“I’ll show you how to make it.”

She pricked her ears up.

“Is that The Smiths? On a love songs album?”

“Yes, ‘How Soon is Now?’ Why wouldn’t it be on there?”

“It’s The Smiths, Derek.”

“Don’t you like them?”

“I’m ambivalent towards them. Do you?”

“I’m a huge fan. Give them a chance, Eva, I have all of their albums.”

“You’re an intriguing man, Derek Caldwell. I look forward to getting to know your soul.”

“Tea, coffee, glass of wine?”

“Tea please, can we take it inside? I love that room.”

“Of course, you go make yourself comfortable and I’ll bring tea and tiramisu.”

I filled a tray with stuff and brought it in to her. She was lying back in the ‘listening’ seat with her eyes closed, lost in the music lost in herself.

“You look peaceful, Eva.”

“I could sit here forever and be quite happy, Derek. I love what you’ve done with this place.”

“Thanks. Are you not afraid of drinking hot drinks whilst naked?”

“I’m not usually this flagrant, Derek. It's very liberating and you’re naked too, after all.”

“Yes, but you look better naked than I do.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that. You look quite masculine from where I’m sitting.”

“How about now,” I said, as I sat beside her, placing a tea tray on a side table near her and handing her a cup of tea.

“Even more so,” she laughed, and sipped her tea. “Jesus, nice tea. You are a fantastic cook, Derek.”

“I do limited things well, that’s all, Eva,” I said, as I picked up some tiramisu and a spoon.

“You’re not limited in the bedroom, that’s for sure,” she whispered.

“I had a fantastic collaborator, Eva.”

“Thank you, but you did all of the work.”

“No, I didn’t. Don’t underestimate your role, Eva. Here, try some of this, it’s delicious,” I said, as I offered a spoonful of the dessert to her lips.

A small sliver of mascarpone and espresso-infused sponge slipped from the spoon and attached itself to the corner of her mouth. I leaned forward and licked it off. Eva sighed softly.

“That’s mine,” she whispered, and reached for my tongue with hers.

She licked the food from my tongue and then sucked my tongue clean.

“What’s the verdict?”

“Interesting serving technique,” she said, making us both laugh.

“If I tried that on purpose it would never work in a million years.”

“It worked now, though. That’s what counts.”

“More?” I held another spoonful up for her.

“Please, it is definitely delicious,” she said, and reached for the spoon.

This time a morsel adhered itself to one of her nipples.

“I’ll do the gentlemanly thing, Eva,” I said, and bent my head to lick the offending food from her nipple, causing a shudder as my teeth made contact with the beautiful erect tip.

She took the spoon from me and placed it on the table. The bowl of dessert followed. She dipped a finger into the dessert, scooped some out and spread it on the top of my rapidly stiffening penis. The cold dessert meeting the warm head of my penis caused me to moan in absolute heavenly pleasure.

She dipped her head towards my erection and slowly licked it off, sucking all around the top to ensure she hadn’t left any behind. She searched the rest of my groin for anything she had missed, then licked a spot on my scrotum, causing an involuntary lift of my hips from the chair as my legs parted.

She then knelt on the floor and lifted my scrotum, taking one of my testicles into her mouth and using a little gentle suction on it.

“That is so good, Eva,” I said, but it came out as just a breath.

She held it inside for a time and then repeated the action on my other testicle. My hand stroked her hair as she lingered with it inside her mouth for a while before releasing it and taking a deep breath.

I lifted her to me and onto my lap, straddling my hips. I kissed her deeply whilst slowly entering her vagina. She lifted slightly, adjusting the angle before sliding down on to my penis until it had fully filled her. She nuzzled her face into the crook of my neck and shoulder, kissing me with light kisses all the while.

“I love your penis, Derek,” she whispered.

“It loves your vagina, Eva.”

“Oh my God!” she said, throwing her head back.

“Are you ok?”

“God yes, I’m going to come, Derek.”

“So quickly?”

She thrust her vagina up and down on my penis in a frenzy of desire, not stopping until she had satisfied her need, soaking my groin in the process.

“I’m so sorry, Derek. It was all just too much for me. I nearly came when you licked the food from my lips.”

“That’s good to know.”

I smiled as I laid back on the chair, my penis hard and strong inside her beautiful soft vagina.

She moved with me as I laid flat, softly moving inside her, her hips grinding her vulva against me in search of stimulation. I increased the length and tempo of my thrusts, this time lasting longer than previously. Her hips moved in time with mine and her breath began to come in gasps, unintelligible words coming from somewhere inside her. She suddenly sat up, a grip of terror from her hands on my shoulders, her legs clamped firmly to my sides. Her hips isolated, she slammed into me, taking me all the way inside, a scream of pleasure, followed by a virtual babbling sound that prefaced the excretion of a huge deluge of ejaculated fluid as another orgasm tore through her.

“Please, Derek, please come again. Please,” she said loudly and passionately.

When I felt her vaginal muscles relax, I thrusted inside her quickly and with more force, in and out with long strokes and increasing power, her hips worked with my thrusts until I couldn’t hold back a powerful stream of semen as it spewed up inside her, leaving us both weak, breathless and covered in a film of sweat as Morrissey sang, ‘To die by your side, is such a heavenly way to die’, in the background.

“Do you still think The Smiths shouldn’t be on an album of love songs, Eva?” I whispered, “That could be our song.”

“No, it couldn’t. Not in a million years, Derek Caldwell,” she said, and we fell around laughing.

She looked into my eyes. Her hair mussed up, her lipstick mostly gone but with a shining light in her eyes and a lustrous pink hue to her skin. She stroked my face and kissed me.

“Thank you for this evening, Derek. Can we go to bed now?”

I woke next morning to the sound of a ringing telephone beside my bed. It was 11:05. Eva stirred beside me, we’d spent the night making love until late into the wee hours of the morning. I extricated my arms from under her body and took the phone to my ear.

“Hello?” was the best I could do.

“Derek? Paddy Brown, you were looking for me last night.”

I sat up in bed and tried to wake up.

“Yes, Paddy. I was trying to see if I could get you to bring me into a league meeting on Monday night. Billy suggested I give you a bell.”

“What’s it about?”

“Something to do with a special small sided league for the kids.”

“How’s that going to work?”

“We might find out at the fucking meeting, Paddy.”

“Yes, I’ll come. I’ll drop over to you at 6:30.”

“I can pick you up if that’s easier.”

“Would you mind?”

“Not at all. I’ll pick you up at 6:30 on Monday night.”

Eva turned on her back to look at me.

“Morning, gorgeous,” I said, and kissed her.

She smiled and took my hand.

“Good morning, Derek. We survived,” she said in a childish voice.

“We did. I would have expected nothing less.”

“I slept so deep afterwards,” she said,

“I did too. It was beautiful. You were beautiful, Eva.”

She touched my face.

“My beautiful man.”

I kissed her again.

“Tea or coffee? I’m going to make some.”

“Coffee for me please, I’ll come with you.”

“You like that expression don’t you?”

“I, what? Oh, shit. Yes, yes I actually do.”

We laughed. I picked her thong up and held it up.

“Do you want this?”

“Oh Derek, stop that. Would you be an angel and bring me my bag from downstairs please? I have a change of clothes in it.”

“You hardly had this on for anytime at all, Eva. It’s still clean.”

“Those are my lucky knickers, Derek.”

“Since when?”

“Last night.”

“I’ll stick the kettle on and bring your bag up.”

I dropped her bag up to the room and came back to the kitchen to make the tea and coffee. I put some bread in the toaster and sat down to wait for everything to come together. I thought back through the evening, looking for any missteps I may have made but I couldn’t identify anything obvious. Eva seemed happy enough all through, even until just then upstairs so maybe I was over sensitive or overly self critical.

The kettle boiled so I made a coffee for Eva, a tea for me and I fetched the toast from the toaster, putting it on a plate, just to show off. She walked in just as I was taking the butter out of the fridge.

“You look nice,” I said to her.

She wore a loose turquoise blouse with blue jeans.

“Thank you, kind sir,” she said, with a curtsy.

“I can whip up scrambled eggs to go with that, if you like, Eva.”

“No, thanks, Derek, this is perfect for me.”

“What have you planned for the day?” I asked.

“Are you getting rid of me?”

“God no. I wondered if there was something you’d like to do together.”

“What are you thinking? Anything?”

“Well, sometimes I like to take a spin out to Howth and walk along the pier. Breathe the fresh air and have some lunch at the Pier Inn. It’s a nice day, would you care to hold my hand as we walk along the pier?”

“I’d love that, Derek. It’s been years since I’ve been out in Howth. Do you do that often?”

”Either there or Dollymount, with lunch at the Yacht. I sometimes go to St. Stephen’s Green with a late lunch at FXB’s. You might prefer that one, Eva.”

“What do you suggest? I’m up for anything.”

“It’s knocking on noon now, so a later lunch might be the way to go. I think we should look at getting in to town for about 2:00 with a view to eating around the 4:00 / 4:30 mark. The evening is ours to enjoy unhurriedly then.”

“That sounds great and it gives me time to shower,” she said, “I night need to get a change of clothes from the house.”

“Wear your hot black dress from last night, we can take a walk around Georgian Dublin instead of the Green. Have a drink outside one of the pubs. You certainly won’t be out of place, Eva.”

“You’re a font of great ideas, Derek. I’m happy just to be with you.”

She skipped off upstairs and I cleared the breakfast stuff, washed everything and put it away. It was a few minutes after noon, so I switched on BBC Five Live to get the football news for that day’s games.

Fifteen minutes, or so, later Eva came in wrapped in a towel. She came and sat beside me, a worried look on her face.

“What’s wrong, love?”

“Not a thing. I missed you that’s all, and I needed a kiss.”

She kissed me and stood to leave.

“I’m finished in the bathroom if you need to use it,”

“Thanks, I’ll jump in the shower so.”

“Oh, Derek, can I use your phone just to check my phone machine at home?”

“Yes, of course, Eva.”

I showered, shaved and dressed quickly. When I got downstairs, Eva was just finished drying her hair.

“I’m all done, Derek. I can get dressed now.”

She ran upstairs and came down fifteen minutes later carrying her bag and dressed the same as when she arrived the day before. I chose to say nothing because she still looked great.

“Anything strange at home?”

“No. Everything is just the fucking same, Derek.”

“Oh! That doesn’t exactly sound like the Eva I’ve come to know.”

“I’m sorry, it’s not me. The ex is sending the kids back this evening instead of tomorrow evening.”

She started to cry.

“Hey, none of that, Eva. What’s his problem?”

“His new girlfriend. This happens every second or third week. I’m expected to just be there all the fucking time.”

“So get him to drop the kids here. You need to have a life too.”

“Here? Really? You’d be up for that?”

“If it makes your life a little easier.”

“Oh Derek. You’re so good for me.”

“Look, Eva, we can abandon our run into town, no point in rushing everything and ruining the evening. We can do loads of that in the future. I’m happy to just sit here with you for now and listen to music or not.”

“It was such a lovely plan though, Derek. I want that, with you.”

“Come and sit here for a bit, relax, calm down and tell me what you want to do.”

“You know what I want to do.”

“What you feel you need to do then.”

I took her hand and we sat in the music chair as she gathered her thoughts.

“I’ll play it his way this last time. He’s dropping them off at 4:30 and expects me to be there when he comes. I’ll be there as usual. I’ll bring Barry around for training on Tuesday and Alice can come too. After training, we might concoct some excuse to come to your house. From then they’ll both know you and we can start seeing each other openly. You can come to mine and vice versa.”

“It’s the beginning of a good plan. I know, bring the form on Tuesday and you can come over here after training with it. We’ll have a cup of tea and Barry, Alice, Charlie and Gary can get to know each other in the way that kids do.”

“Why do you call your daughter, Charlie?”

“Her name is Charlotte after my ex’s mother. I don’t like that so I call her Charlie. It suits her personality better.”

“Ok, let’s do that. Hopefully, they’ll all get on.”

“We’ll be fine. You’ll see.”

“So what do we do for the afternoon?”

“Pick an album, Eva, just kick back and relax, the universe has spoken.”

“You are so wise. Yes, I’d like to do that for the afternoon.”

“You would?”

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be. Do you have any more of that tiramisu left?”

“Eva Clery! I’m shocked.”

“You’ve opened my eyes to the value of my body, Derek. Go get the tiramisu, one bowl and one spoon. I’ll get naked, unless you’d prefer to do that for me?”

“Stay right there. I’ll be ten seconds, literally.”

She left for home three hours later following an afternoon of beautiful lovemaking, some leftover pasta and a cramped, but sensual, shared bathing experience. I cleaned the place up and, not wishing to be alone, took the car and went for a drive along the seafront at Clontarf. When I came back, I called Gary Penrose.

“Hey Derek, thanks for calling.”

“Long time no see, Gary. What do you need?”

“I heard you’re running a little team for Bonnybrook Boys.”

“Where’d you hear that?”

“The grapevine around here isn’t that big, Derek. You should know that.”

“True. So what’s it to you?”

“You’ve a lovely way with words, as usual.”

“I know two other words.”

“Ok. I’m involved down in Tolka with Shelbourne. Frank O’Neill and me are taking charge of a whole new schoolboy section and we need managers and coaches. How about it?”

“What? Are you serious? You want my father to take a stroke?”

“Artie wouldn’t mind.”

“Gary, he’s a dyed-in-the-wool Rovers man, he didn’t talk to me for three years after I signed for Bohs. Besides, my Gary is on this team and he likes it, so a change isn’t in the cards.”

“Are they any good?”

“They’re eight years old.”

“You can bring the whole team down.”

“No, that’d be bad form, Gary. I’m surprised at you for saying that.”

“I know, but we’re desperate to get the best coaching system in place and you’d be top of the tree.”

“Thanks, Gary, but I’ll have to pass. I need to be able to look myself in the mirror, and there are good people involved here.”

“Well if you change your mind, you have my number.”

“Do you have an under 9 team?”

“Yes.”

“Would they play us in a training game?”

“They’d be too good for you.”

“Ok Gary, be a prick if you want. I’ll ask Franko.”

I hung up on him. Gary used to be a decent player and it was reassuring to know that some things never changed. He was as much of an arsehole as ever.

On Monday evening I knocked on Paddy’s door at 6:15. A tall blonde girl with rabbit’s teeth answered it.

“Are you Margaret?” I asked.

“No, I’m Elaine.”

“How many little Bs are there?”

“What do you mean by that?”

“Nothing. I’m here to collect Paddy.”

She turned her head and shouted back into the house.

“Da! There’s someone at the door for you.”

She turned back and said,

“He’ll be with you in a minute,” and walked away.

“Thanks,” I said, to the rude bitch’s back, “I’ll be in the car.”

Paddy hobbled out on his crutches a few minutes later.

“You met the eldest daughter, I see,” he said.

“Yes, nice girl.”

“She’s a bit of a consequence when you get to know her. Takes after her mother.”

“How old is she?”

“Twenty-five.”

“When she gets married she’ll be out of your hair, Paddy.”

“She needs to get a man first.”

“Not necessarily.”

He burst out laughing.

“You’re such a prick.”

“That’s what she said last night.”

“Who?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“Billy tells me you signed a new player. You don’t let the grass grow under your feet, do you?”

“He’s not signed yet, Paddy. I gave his mother the form but she hasn’t brought it back yet. I hope she will tomorrow night. He’s supposed to be a good little player.”

“Ah, little Eva. Lovely girl. A shame she got stuck with that Mousey Clery bollox.”

“What happened?”

“He fucked around with every little slapper in the area until she eventually got sense and kicked him out.”

“These things happen, Paddy. Is she with anyone now?”

“Do you fancy your chances?”

“I spoke to the woman for five minutes and gave her a form, she doesn’t even know I exist.”

“I think she’s back on the market, though. I met her next door neighbour at mass and he said she was offside on Friday night until Saturday evening.”

“Sounds like Reuters should employ this guy.”

“Did Billy say what’s going on in here tonight?”

“Yes, something about a new small sided game for the kids. It could be a good idea if they handle it right.”

“In what way?”

“I’ve seen it in Holland. A seven-a-side game with smaller pitches, goals, balls etc. Three subs that all have to get a minimum ten or fifteen minutes every game. It’s a recipe for disaster and the idiots in charge, now, will argue against it until they’re blue in the face. Mark my words.”

“You can argue against them, Derek. You might enjoy that.”

“Fuck off, Paddy.”

We parked outside a trophy manufacturer’s shop I Capel Street and walked up to the League offices.

“A lot of cars here tonight. This’ll be packed,” Paddy said.

He was right. The meeting room on the first floor was full to overflowing. Because Paddy had crutches he was assigned a seat at the front of the hall. I took up a spot about halfway along the side wall where I could see the whole room.

A tall bald man wearing glasses walked among us distributing an overview of what the meeting was about. I put out my hand to take one and he shook it. I looked at him and he smiled at me.

“Derek Caldwell. How the hell are you?” he said warmly.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know you.”

“Pat Hennessy, treasurer of the League.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I brought Paddy Brown in.”

“Paddy from Bonnybrook Boys?”

“The very man.”

“Well it’s great to see you, I hope we get a minute to chat after the meeting.”

He went about his business and I watched as he spoke to Paddy. They were then joined by a smaller man wearing glasses, who turned out to be the League Secretary. He sat in the centre of a row of chairs facing the audience. He banged a glass tumbler on the table, bringing the meeting to order.

He was quite verbose and he wittered on about the proposed initiative which was, as I intimated to Paddy, based on the Dutch system currently in operation. He finished his presentation and opened the meeting up to the floor for discussion. The first dissenting voice came from the chairman of Portmarnock FC.

Cramming as many big words into his speech as possible, he dragged us all down a road of torture and pain. Leading us to believe that the good people of Portmarnock were caught to the pin of their collar in an economy that wasn’t performing and where funds were tighter than the elastic of a nuns underwear. Disregarding the fact that Portmarnock was one of the wealthiest regions in Dublin where average house prices were triple the prices where we lived.

A positive howl of voices demanded attention to reply to, or agree with, the first guy's viewpoint. The glass tumbler was banged again. I opened the page that I had been handed and was reading it while the man spoke. I was also thinking about the next evening and looking forward to seeing Eva again when I felt my arm going poked.

“What the fuck, man?” I said to the guy poking me.

“Liam is talking about you.”

“What?”

I could see Paddy looking back at me with a smile on his face.

“Derek, good evening. Thanks for attending tonight,” he said to me across the crowded hall. Many heads were turned in my direction as he continued, “for those of you who don’t know, Derek Caldwell is one of the best players ever produced in this country. With a promising career at Liverpool FC cut short by injury. Derek’s prowess on the field of play was a joy to behold, his talent was aspirational to those who played the game and his notoriety was famous to everyone connected with the game in this country. Derek, you’re very welcome here tonight.”

A round of applause accompanied his little speech. I waved at the assembled crowd and wished I was dead. The Portmarnock guy started to speak again, asking what relevance the presence of a burned-out player from fifteen years ago was to the matter at hand. Despite everything I tried to do, I couldn’t help it. The idiot had pissed me off. I put my hand up to speak. Liam called on me.

"Thank you for the generous introduction Mr. Secretary. I was asked to come here tonight by the Chairman of Bonnybrook Boys FC, Billy Judge, who can't attend for various reasons. I didn't catch the man's name from Portmarnock and I can see he is quite exercised by the proposed implementation of a new philosophy to the game. Unfortunately, his argument is based purely in finances and money and not in any way on trying to improve the enjoyment of the children he purportedly represents. He also has the advantage of reading from a prepared statement while I am speaking off the cuff. You'll have to forgive me for that.

As had been shown historically in this game of ours, money is never a reason not to do something. In fact, the lack of money is often the basis of a successful initiative at all levels. The soccer fraternity have always reached into their pockets to improve the lot of the children and adults who participate in this game of ours. The overriding ethos of the game at this level is, and always has been, respect, fair play, teamwork and the participation of children at all levels, talented or not. Clubs are run by men and women who do not ask for recompense. Men and women manage teams out of the goodness of their hearts, wash gear, mark pitches, run around players' houses when matches have been postponed and all manner of other functions required for the successful running of a local club. None of them seek payment or reward.

It is not about the blowhards who come in to places like this on a Monday evening to try and shout down everyone else that has an opposing viewpoint. Neither is it about the cost of things over of the value of things. Nor is it a forum whereby somebody who has no record of ever kicking a ball in anger, or anybody else, for that matter, has the right or the outright gall to mock or question the relevance of any human being in any situation and in any forum, to be present. Burned out or not.

This is one of the fundamentals of Nazism, from a man who hails from one of the wealthiest areas of the region, and bases his argument on a lack of finances. I find that to be totally hypocritical and downright offensive, and I feel he should be removed from this meeting and that his committee should look seriously at preventing him representing the rights of children in any sport or activity.

On my way in here this evening I discussed the reasons for this meeting, given that I had been given little clue about what it was actually about. I mentioned to my passenger that it sounded like the system currently in use in Holland, a system whereby the small kids from six to ten years of age play across a full-sized pitch with reduced goal sizes, smaller footballs and played in a seven a side format with three substitutes who must get at least ten minutes of play in every game. It's a game of four quarters instead of twp halves and it has produced several of the current Dutch National team's players, along with most of the Ajax and Feyenoord youth Academy graduates currently on their books.

I have seen this system in action. In Holland it is coupled with a coaching system designed by Wim Coerver, a personal friend of mine, and called the Coerver System of Coaching. I wholeheartedly endorse this initiative and I hope that no effort is spared in bringing it to fruition. Our club, Bonnybrook Boys, do not have the resources available to initiate it, but I'm sure we will be able to get it off the ground. I would also assume that the FAI or the SFAI would be able to tap into resources at UEFA and FIFA level, because there will be some expense involved in getting kits, equipment such as goal posts and nets, managers and other incidental requirements that elude me at this moment, as well as the introduction of a coaching system designed for use at the young ages involved in this initiative. I'm sure that the Secretary was going to put this side of the argument instead of some burned-out hack like me, but I think it is a positive thing that burned-out hacks are people too. Thank you for your time."

I leaned back against the wall. The red-faced Portmarnock guy stood to tear me a new one. Paddy Brown stood up and started clapping. The entire assembled top table did the same and there was unanimity from the body of the assembled audience. I went to walk out but was approached by well-wishers wanting to shake my hand. I gave up and let it happen. The meeting was closed and the audience dispersed, I walked over to where Paddy was sitting,

“Are we going or what?” I said to him.

“There’s a man over there wants to talk to you,” he said, pointing at him with his crutch.

It was the Portmarnock guy. I walked over to him.

“You looking for me?”

“I’d like to apologise.”

“For what?”

“Calling you burned out.”

“Do you manage one of the teams in Portmarnock?”

“No.”

“You’re the Chairman?”

“Yes.”

“Ok, I’m sure my team will meet one of your teams during the season.”

“I’m sure they will,” he relaxed and smiled.

“We’ll see who’s burned out then,” I said, and walked away.

I dropped Paddy at his house. He was buzzing all the way back. I could imagine that the phone lines between his house and Billy’s house would be on fire after the performance in the League offices.

He waved as he left me and I drove home. The phone was ringing as I walked through the door. I picked it up.

“Derek Caldwell speaking.”

“Hi Derek.”

“Eva? Are you ok?”

“Yes, I’m very well, thanks. Can I ask you a question?”

“Yes, anything.”

“Are you an alcoholic?”

“Yes, that’s why I don’t drink.”

“My ex found out that I was seeing someone. He wanted to know who you were. When I told him he threatened to take the kids away unless I stopped seeing you.”

“So you’re ending it before it really starts?”

“I have to, Derek, please understand.”

“I’ll try. Good night, Eva.”

I hung up the phone and jumped in my car. I drove to Dollymount Beach and parked my car on the sand. I was hurting. Pain in my chest and stomach. The longing for a drink was never far away but I couldn’t take one under any circumstances. I’d lose my job, my kids, my life. Everything gone in the blink of a barman’s eye. I’d been here before, many times. I’d be here again. I just needed to get through this night. I slept in the car for a couple of hours and woke, shivering, at 1:45.

I started it up and drive home. There were two cars outside the house and a meeting was taking place at my door. I walked up and stood beside them.

“What’s the story?” I asked.

“Jesus, Derek, where have you been?” my father said.

“In town at a football meeting.”

“Until this hour?”

“No, I went down to Lynches for a few chips and the car wouldn’t start. I had to get it going and it took a while. What are you all doing here?”

“Your mother tried to phone you and there was no answer. We panicked. Sorry, son.”

“It’s ok. I understand. If you don’t mind, I’ve had a bitch of an evening and I’m knackered.”

TBC