Maria pulled her hair away from her shoulder blades as Allen soaped up her back with the shower kooshie. He scrubbed all along Maria’s back and her ticklish sides, to the top of her ass, as she sighed and giggled at his light touches.

“Gonna get you squeaky clean, baby girl,” Allen murmured. As he bent over to scrub Maria down, his left thigh hit something. He turned around and saw an enormous suction cup dildo protruding from the shower stall glass.

“Really?” Allen laughed.

“Don’t judge,” Maria said, turning and putting her arms up in the air so Allen could scrub her beautiful boobies and tummy. Finally, he pinned her against the wall of the shower stall, dropping the kooshie. They embraced and began enforcing sexy, lascivious, open-mouth, gettin'-mine kisses on each other. Maria moved her hands over Allen’s chest. Allen reached into Maria’s pussy, putting his middle and ring fingers inside her tight, needy, sugar walls.

Maria lifted her left leg up to receive Allen’s finger-fucking. She looked at him with absolute animal lust and desire as he pumped his digits in and out of her hungry pussy.

“Oh, God baby, do that,” she moaned. “Do that to me.”

Allen was about to steer Maria around for some rumpy-pumpy shower sex up against the fiberglass door (as if he would know how to pull that off. Given their differing height, there was a degree of difficulty that his just-lost-my-virginity sexual method might not be able to handle).

Then, both Maria and Allen snapped to attention at the sound of a door slamming in the front of the house.

“Hey, Mom!” called out a voice. “Mom?”

A lightning bolt went right through Allen. Mom? What the fuck?

Maria put a finger over her mouth in a sssh!!!! gesture and called out, “Hi, Makennah!”

Makennah?! Allen's mind practically screamed. The lifeguard at the country club?!

“Hey, Mom!” the girl’s voice trilled.

“I’m in the shower, be right there!” Maria sang.

“OK!” Makennah said.

Allen lowered his voice to a stage whisper. “You have a … you have a daughter?”

“Ssssssh,” Maria hissed. “Yes, with Mitch. She went to live with him when she went to USC.”

Allen had to fight a scream in his reply: “USC?! You have a daughter at USC?!”

Maria grabbed Allen's neck “Be quiet, baby. You just stay here.” She turned the shower nozzles off. “Just be quiet and stay here. And don’t get out of the shower,” she said, stabbing a finger at Allen for effect.

Maria tippie-toed out of the shower and quickly swabbed her slutty, eyeshadowed lids with a makeup wipe and peeled off her false eyelashes. Wrapping herself in a huge, pillowy, terrycloth robe with her initials monogrammed on it, she grabbed a pair of cheap gas-station Lynda Carter-ass stunna sunglasses and put them over her eyes to conceal any of the makeup that she didn’t get with the makeup wipe.

Allen heard Maria greet her daughter through the drywall of the bathroom. “Hello, love,” she said. “I was just in the tanning bed.”

She has a fucking tanning bed here? What? Where? Allen thought.

Allen struggled to hear Maria talking to her daughter. The gist of it was that Makennah was done with finals after her junior year, and the student newspaper had closed for summer break, so she was back home, in Springfield, because her father was out in Oregon running one of his dealership’s franchisees on an interim basis, or maybe just giving them all a lesson in selling cars. Whatever the case, Makennah was going back to work as a lifeguard at the Nine Cedars Country Club pool.

Allen’s mind reeled. All this time, and I never knew. Makennah had, for the past three summers, dealt with Allen's bullshit (and his friends) out at the Nine Cedars pool with swift dismissals, if not outright entire-day bans. Sometimes she even forced them to clean leaves out at opening time, or even scrub the changing room toilets, to be let back in.

Allen started shivering. The warm fog of the shower had long since cleared, and now he felt a clammy cold all over him there in Maria’s shower. But she directly ordered him not to get out of the stall, so there he stayed.

Then, he heard Makennah tell her Mom she needed to use the toilet. And he heard footfalls coming into the master bedroom, and therefore the master bath.

Oh FUCK. Oh SHIT! Allen did the only thing he knew to do. He turned to face the corner of the shower and went completely rigid, leaning up against the side of the shower on the balls of his left foot, as if he were a mannequin, next to the suction-cup dildo. Maybe with his hairless, fully tanned body, he could pull it off, and Makennah wouldn’t look too closely through the mottled fiberglass shower walls. He was leaning on his left foot against the corner of the shower, ramrod straight as if he were a totally inanimate object.

Makennah sat on the john for what felt like a fucking hour. Goddamn, how long does it take for a girl to piss?! Allen thought. Makennah was leafing through one of her Mom’s Cosmopolitan magazines, from a basket next to the toilet, probably reading about how to fuck a man or get a husband or some shit like that. Allen felt his traction sliding from his left foot and gently shifted his weight, but still maintained an inanimate posture, arms flat against his thighs. Finally, Makennah stood up, ripped a square of toilet paper off the roll, wiped herself, flushed, and left.

Allen sank to the floor of the shower, gasping for all the breath he had held through Makennah’s visit to the john. He heard Makennah and Maria talking out in the den.

“What the hell is that thing in the shower?” Makennah asked Maria.

“Oh, that’s ‘Big Brad’” Maria said dismissively, thinking Makennah was asking about the suction cup dildo. Perhaps Allen had escaped to the linen closet?

“Mom, that’s gross,” Makennah said.

“He’s just a sex toy,” Maria said, pouring herself some coffee. “Honey, when you get to be my age, you’ll understand the needs we ladies have.”

Allen was paralyzed by fear and embarrassment. But also, Just a sex toy?! What the fuck?! He and Maria were gonna have a talk after Makennah left; that was for sure.