I grabbed my cardigan and handbag and stormed out, slamming the front door behind me. I'd had enough of him for one morning.
My husband, Philip had health problems which meant that sometimes he did not have the strength to walk far due to his extreme fatigue and difficulty in breathing and, as a result, he also had mood swings when the weariness got the better of him.
Today was one of those days. I knew it wasn't his fault but sometimes, like today, I was the butt of his anger and he would constantly nit pick and complain in a sort of whining manner.
I could only take so much, so, as the argument escalated, I stormed out.
It was the best course of action I could take. If we stayed in the same confines as each other we would end up saying really hurtful things.
I have a massive stubborn streak and when I know I have done nothing wrong I get defensive so, here I was, storming out of the house, his angry words still ringing in my ears:
"Go on then, sod off! See if I care! I don't need you!"
I needed to clear my head, get away, somewhere quiet.
The holiday cottage we had rented was near to a long beach which was shielded by an area of dunes and then a wide, shallow beach. The tide always came in quickly due to the almost unnoticeable slope and there were no waves to speak of. The cold salt water just crept lazily up the sand until it reached the early slopes of the dunes. There it would linger, lapping gently at the shoreline until the forces of nature and the pull of the planets called it away again and it would recede just as lazily back towards the ocean.
Being the north east of England, the coastline was sparsely populated. This was a lonely, rugged coast and quite possibly the most beautiful in the country. There were long stretches of sandy beaches, completely empty a lot of the time. That was why we came here. The cottage was the only only one for miles and it was so quiet that the gentle waves lapping up the sand were heard so easily, like one of those mood CDs that all the mystic shops sell.
The instant the door slammed behind me I took a deep breath and set off along the path towards the sea, putting my arms into the little cotton cardigan as I went.
Already, the sound of the rustling course grass and the lapping of the waves was taking my stress away and I began to relax as I walked to the dunes.
My plan was to walk through the dunes to the sea and possibly walk along the beach for a way so I followed the path that seemed to wind itself between the sandy peaks until I was several feet above the surrounding area.
I looked out to sea, shielding my eyes from the glare of the bright warm sun. The light glittering and flashing across the ripples on the ocean.
In the distance a large ship followed the line of the horizon but to me it was tiny.
There was a wind blowing gently across the dunes, lifting sand off the tops and dropping it further along. It also blew my knee length summer dress against my legs and caused it to flutter behind me like a flag and my hair blew across my face.
It was not a cold wind that was blowing from the sea, on the contrary, but I decided to continue my stroll and walk along the flat beach, the breeze in my hair and the waves at my feet.
I stepped out and down the slopes taking me back into the dunes.
The soft warm sand felt wonderful between between my toes and I stopped for a moment and wiggled my feet so they sank into the cooler sand beneath.
It is strange, the effect a little solitude can have on a mind in turmoil. I had almost forgotten already about the reason I was here. The shouting and arguing seemed a distant memory now and I had been out only about fifteen minutes. I felt calm and at peace with the world. I felt at one with the hissing of the waves as they rolled along the beach and the gentle moaning of the wind through the dunes.
Once again I stopped but this time I wanted to listen. That wasn't the wind moaning...
The sound, gentle and almost inaudible was coming from, more or less, ahead of me. I walked a few more steps and stopped again.
No, this time I was certain, that was definitely not the wind!
I began to climb back up, to the top of the dune before me and, as I reached the top my eyes opened wide for there, on the other side, was a pretty young girl. She could not have been more than eighteen. Very slim with long brown hair blowing slightly across her pretty face. She was lying on her back, facing the sun and wearing a tight white vest top and very short cut off jeans. So short that the pockets were visible below the ragged hem which accentuated her long, beautiful, lightly tanned legs.
This was the source of the moaning for this vision in front of me lay with the button and zip of her shorts open and her fingers were clearly giving her much pleasure, although invisible, inside the denim of her shorts.
I stood transfixed at the beautiful scene below, just a few feet away and I watched.
I felt I shouldn't and should turn and leave this delicious young woman to her own world but I couldn't.
Almost without realising, my own hand began began to find it's way between my own legs, pressing the soft thin fabric against me.
I was mesmerized by the movement of her fingers, even though it was just a slight rippling of fabric, and the contortions of her face, eyes closed and head moving in tiny motions left, right, more a twitch than a concious movement.
As my own fingers began to rub at my pliant flesh I wondered what she was thinking about that made her feel so sexy, here, outside.
Suddenly, a big round bee appeared in front of me, it's wings humming and it's furry round body hovering around my head.
I like bees but I did not wish to be stung and this one startled me so, instinctively, I brushed it away with my hand and ducked.
The soft sand that covered my feet shifted at the sudden movement and I fell backwards and slid down a few feet. This caused a mini avalanche the end of which disturbed the beautiful girl below.
She withdrew her hand suddenly and sat up. Her eyes snapping open and looking around at me in fear.
She didn't speak but just jumped to her feet, looking at me and fastening her shorts.
“ I... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you!” I blurted out in embarrassment. I felt like a kind of voyeur who had been caught spying.
I noticed a slight movement of her eyes and I looked down to see my dress had pulled right up as I slid, revealing my pale yellow briefs, half buried in the sand that had pushed up between my legs.
I hurriedly pulled my skirt down to cover myself and struggled ungainly to my feet.
“ Were you spying on me?” She looked angry and I felt just as I thought I would. My faced reddened even more, if that was at all possible. I was hoping that the sand beneath my feet would envelope me and carry me away from this awkward situation but, of course, it didn't.
“ No, I...well.” I couldn't look at her, “Not spying. I was just walking and I saw you and you looked so sexy and, and...”
It took all my strength of will to look up her and I saw she was frowning but didn't appear angry any more.
“ Look,” I continued, “I really am sorry to have embarrassed you but, well, this is a public place and you were ... well, were... you know. I couldn't help but look. I have never seen such a beautiful sight before.”
“ Now it is my turn to blush,” she replied and indeed she was, “No-one has ever called me beautiful before.”
I realised that this girl was not English, she sounded more... Australian. Her accent was very sexy as she spoke and I smiled and held out my hand.
“ I am Anna,” and smiled.
“ I am Alison but you can call me Ali if you wish.”
“ Hi Alison,” I said, thinking to myself that Alison suited her very much. “I am pleased to meet you. Sorry about watching you.”
“ Oh, that's okay, Anna, as you said, this is a public place.” She paused for a moment then smiled again. “Would you care to join me for a while?” and gesticulated the blanket she had been lying on.
“ Mmm... yes, that would be very nice. Thank you.”
I brushed the sand off my dress and we sat side by side.
“ I can tell you are not local. Australia?”
“ Well done!” she laughed, “I have been called both, South African and Kiwi on this trip!”
“ Well, I have relatives in New Zealand so I know that one. What brings you to the UK Alison?”
“ I am on holiday with my parents. They have gone to visit friends today so they let me take the car for a few hours. I drove out here to enjoy the sea and the peace.”
I smiled mischievously.
“ You certainly did seem to be enjoying it.” I winked at her and she blushed again.
“ I think this place got me too relaxed.” she smiled back.
“ Dare I ask what was in your mind?”
“ Hmm...” she smiled. “I was reading a book about two women who became lovers. It was very explicit.”
“ You like that?” I asked out of curiosity.
“ I think so,” Alison replied. “I enjoy reading about it and watching , erm... movies but I have never done it.”
I looked down at my feet which were wriggling in the sand.
“ I know what you mean,” I said quietly.