'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,

We were fucking like rabbits, both pissed on the Grouse.

My stockings were strewn on the back of a chair,

And my legs were akimbo, both feet in the air.

My husband was fucking me hard on the bed,

When, “I’m cumming! I’m cumming!” he finally said.

He finished inside with a moan and a grunt,

Then he slept before making me cum - what a cunt!

I was still feeling horny and down on my luck,

When a noise from outside made me say, “What the fuck?!”

Away to the shutter I flew like a flash,

Our juices still wet in my cock-hungry gash.

I opened the window, peered out in the snow,

And focused my gaze on the garden below,

When what to my wondering eyes did appear,

But a fucking great sleigh and eight randy reindeer!

The driver wolf-whistled and flashed me his dick,

And I knew in a moment, it’s naughty St. Nick!

As soon as the sleigh stopped, the amorous deer

Started rutting; each bull took a cow from the rear.

First Dasher, then Dancer, then Prancer and Vixen,

In Comet, in Cupid, in Donner, in Blitzen!

On the top of the porch! On the top of the wall!

There was no way to stop them, no method at all!

As deer-spunk and faeces bespattered the lawn,

I knew I’d be cleaning it up, come the dawn.

Then, up to the housetop the reindeer they flew

With the sleigh full of sex toys, and Naughty Nick too—

And then, with a clatter, I heard on the roof,

The tiles breaking under the weight of each hoof.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

As bare as a jaybird, his head to his foot,

With his cock and balls tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of sex toys he’d flung on his back,

And he looked like a perv as he ogled my rack.

His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples, how merry,

I could tell that he fancied my Christmastide cherry!

He took hold of my hair, pushed my head way down low,

Thrust his cock to the back of my throat in one go;

It was huge! Very long and incredibly chubby,

As I sucked him off next to my still-sleeping hubby.

He led me to bed, lay me down on my belly,

As he lubed himself up with some thick K-Y Jelly.

I came so many times with his cock in my ass,

I have never since felt such a fortunate lass.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head

Soon gave me to know I was now to be bred;

He spoke not a word, but continued his work,

As he came in my snatch with a curse and a jerk.

Then, laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a signal,

Then he flew off next door to fuck young Mrs Dignall.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he flew out of sight—

“Usual time again next year, eh, Nisha? Good night!”