Lisa wasn't a big fan of Christmas. Her surname, Toe, meant the seasonal Miss L. Toe jokes had plagued her for years. She had toyed with the idea of using her middle name instead, but Camilla Toe hadn't seemed like much of an improvement. Talking about the cross she had to bear wasn't something Lisa usually did, but it was Christmas Eve, and she felt a little conversation might lift her spirits. "I think I'll just stay in...

Santa couldn't make his mind up, Naughty or Nice? The bearded cockster was in the midst of the kind of dilemma he always had in the run-up to the big day. The first Christmas Day knobbing was something Santa always looked forward to. He always celebrated the midnight tea break fuck with a loud shout of "Christmas is cumming!" after he had fired his shot of Santa sauce onto or into the lucky recipient. Slippery Sally and T...

Willie had left it until the last minute. It was Christmas Eve. He'd be spending it alone unless you counted his dog, 'Boner,' which he did, of course. The supermarket was chaos, and Willie felt harassed as he fought his way through the meat section, looking at the labelling when the contents of each fridge were unclear. The panic buyers had turned everything on its head. Items weren't where they were supposed to be, and...