Lush Friends and Chatting Question

26 Mar 2014

I have been here for over two years. I have made many good friends, some I chat with here, and a select few I talk to on occasion else where............

My question is, why do some people talk real nice and decent the first few times, then all of a sudden, they just exsist, but do not reply to pleasantries of any sort....

Iknow some people do not like to be poked, so I am considerate of that, others have stated certain things on their profiles, and I respect those wishes.

I am an adult, so I can take honesty, maybe you want to have naughty chats, and are too shy to ask? Maybe you are here for serious chats, I am fine with that............

But to not answer when being asked if you would rather be left alone...........or not answering if askes if your busy.................and not deleting me even..................

whats up with that?

Do they add for numbers?

Just somethings I have noticed in my two years, and thought you wiser ones may have some ideas and inputs............

27 Mar 2014

i'd say that they are:

1) away from the keyboard
2) busy doing something that they don't want/can't be be interrupted from
3) not interested anymore
4) simply miss your OM/black box (i assume that's what we're talking about?)

You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.

27 Mar 2014

I think sprite made a good point.. Some people add friends just for numbers. If they don't reply at all it means it's time to move on.

27 Mar 2014

There are times when I log in I'm bombarded with at least ten black boxes.
If I'm on my phone it is next to impossible to answer all of them. (I'm all thumbs and can't spell for shit on touch screen phones)
Sometimes I just don't have the time to answer back because I'm quickly checking in.
Other times I have to shut it down fast so I don't get caught. (This happens more than you think)
But my favourite reason why I don't answer? I have nothing to say. I literally spend all day being pleasant and making conversation with random strangers that all I want to do is relax and not talk/type anything to anyone. I just don't have it in me to bring up this facade of small talk. Nor do I want to cyber.
I do forget to answer PMs at times and it's a failing I should probably work on. But constantly being pressured to chit chat from people demanding your time, on a website designed to be fun and relaxing, makes me want to avoid it completely. I'm an anti-social freak. This is why I'm set to invisible. If I don't it's twenty times worse.
I still value and cherish the friendships I have but most of my friends know what I'm like, and if they don't then maybe they don't care or they're anti-social like I am.

I wouldn't take it personally. But if you do, then remove them from your friends list.

27 Mar 2014

Quote by TheDevilsWeakness
There are times when I log in I'm bombarded with at least ten black boxes.
If I'm on my phone it is next to impossible to answer all of them. (I'm all thumbs and can't spell for shit on touch screen phones)
Sometimes I just don't have the time to answer back because I'm quickly checking in.
Other times I have to shut it down fast so I don't get caught. (This happens more than you think)
But my favourite reason why I don't answer? I have nothing to say. I literally spend all day being pleasant and making conversation with random strangers that all I want to do is relax and not talk/type anything to anyone. I just don't have it in me to bring up this facade of small talk. Nor do I want to cyber.
I do forget to answer PMs at times and it's a failing I should probably work on. But constantly being pressured to chit chat from people demanding your time, on a website designed to be fun and relaxing, makes me want to avoid it completely. I'm an anti-social freak. This is why I'm set to invisible. If I don't it's twenty times worse.
I still value and cherish the friendships I have but most of my friends know what I'm like, and if they don't then maybe they don't care or they're anti-social like I am.

I wouldn't take it personally. But if you do, then remove them from your friends list.

you sound like you would let people know if you do not want to chat, and that is what is lacking in the people I am commenting on.........

you, act like an adult, ............ smile

many on here do not lol

27 Mar 2014

I think we all have accepted a friends request and for whatever the reason it never goes any further than that.

I am not a friends collector and if neither of us care enough to contact the other I figure I am not the right person for that guy/gal.

Cleaning friends out of the house once in a while is not a bad thing.

However I have made some wonderful friends that I talk to everyday.

27 Mar 2014

Quote by 1nympholes
I think we all have accepted a friends request and for whatever the reason it never goes any further than that.

I am not a friends collector and if neither of us care enough to contact the other I figure I am not the right person for that guy/gal.

Cleaning friends out of the house once in a while is not a bad thing.

However I have made some wonderful friends that I talk to everyday.

Same story here..........

28 Mar 2014

I think people are here for all different things.

1. Some just read.
2. Some just write stories
3. Some have cyber sex
4. Some want just regular chatting
5. Some don't want any interaction

I like to talk to my friends or exchange pictures on each others walls

I always ask people what they are looking for from me before I add them to my circle. I don't have cyber sex. So if that's what they are looking for then probably not a good fit.

28 Mar 2014

Quote by keepiteasy

you, act like an adult, ............ many on here do not lol

OI! You take that back! I refuse to grow up! clown

In reflection of this question, I just recently touched base with someone that's been on my friends list for years. We've never really spoken before. But he made a comment in his blog the other day that made me think of something and I had to poke fun of.

Cleaning out your friends list is all well and good. I just don't have the heart to slash mercilessly at it so I tend to carry a larger load of friends than some. Unless you're aggressively hounding me to cyber or send pics or being a general nuisance, I just don't see any other reason to take you off there.

I now have someone new to speak hockeyisms with because I didn't clean out my friends list.

28 Mar 2014

I have many, many Lush friend but probably only about 20 I really ever chat with. When I first joined lush I would basically add any woman who asked me and guys once I got to know them and they showed me they had more to offer than " I have a big cock", LOL. But I soon found out many of them were not interested in anything other than a quick cyberfuck or just padding their stats. I probably should weed a lot of them out but I just never got around to it.

When ever someone sends me a PM or Black Box I always try to answer them. But sometimes I log in and have so many black boxes it is hard to get to them all so some people will get priority. Even when I get a PM from a stranger, as long as they were respectful I will answer even if I am not really interested in adding them as a friend. But sometimes that can be misleading and give them the wrong idea.

I know sometimes I will send out a Black Box message and I don't always get a reply. I will assume the person was busy or just didn't see it. But if it happens repeatedly then I will assume they no longer want to be friends and leave it at that.

28 Mar 2014

Other times I have to shut it down fast so I don't get caught. (This happens more than you think)

f-hihi

lol

28 Mar 2014

Quote by keepiteasy

Do they add for numbers?

I would say yes. (most times)

I'm sure that some peoples would not even read (pic is enough) a profile before sending the request.

C'mon what can you seriously do with hundreds (which is fine to have) of friends?

I'm sure for a woman even more than a man it must be exasperating at times. It could be however part of a normal selection.

I do agree that good etiquette should be practiced even online.

Have fun.

Choose n Practice Happiness

Life is simple; we are what we eat and what we read. Talk is superfluous.

28 Mar 2014

What black boxes?

The Cellist: Glissando | Lush Stories

28 Mar 2014

Quote by keepiteasy
why do some people talk real nice and decent the first few times, then all of a sudden, they [do] not answer when being asked if you would rather be left alone...........or not answering if askes if your busy.................and not deleting me even..................whats up with that? Do they add for numbers?

You said that you are an adult, and therefore appreciate honesty. I respect how you explained this. I also believe in online etiquette and respecting people (even when I am not here to be social or chat & it even says on my profile. I still do the decency of replies and not be someone who is a stone).

Some people are NOT honest, of course, and they may not even know how to be... but much more so I think it is simply a case of they do not want to, in otherwords, take the time~ I have never been that way, but my boyfriend explained to me that it is easier and better to just ignore. Then he gets a bit miffed that this just isn't my style.

There are people in it for numbers. I was on another site, and it was the same way. I had almost 1000 fans and had only fanned back 10-20 & those were the ones I talked to regularly. Same here. Most people do not understand or do that. As for others who talked to you at one point or another, they feel like why delete someone?

This is my guess.

29 Mar 2014

thanks for all the good replies. Makes me understand a little better I guess. altho I still think they shud just delete me, then I would know where they are at lol

Maybe I get a lil too atttached? heaven forbid lol

29 Mar 2014

Quote by TheDevilsWeakness

OI! You take that back! I refuse to grow up!

In reflection of this question, I just recently touched base with someone that's been on my friends list for years. We've never really spoken before. But he made a comment in his blog the other day that made me think of something and I had to poke fun of.

Cleaning out your friends list is all well and good. I just don't have the heart to slash mercilessly at it so I tend to carry a larger load of friends than some. Unless you're aggressively hounding me to cyber or send pics or being a general nuisance, I just don't see any other reason to take you off there.

I now have someone new to speak hockeyisms with because I didn't clean out my friends list.

not gonna take it back, nope.

evil4

Hockeyisms???????????? is that an approved word? in Lush? lol

31 Mar 2014

Quote by keepiteasy

Hockeyisms???????????? is that an approved word? in Lush? lol

Your location is Canada, so you should know (IF you're a hockey lover, because contrary to popular belief not all Canadians are) that my beloved Leafs are called the Laffs by inferior fans that cheer for inferior teams. Like the Oilers.

Q: What do the Edmonton Oilers and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 20,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ"

Those are hockeyisms. It's also a slight dig. (Like 20 thousand people even go to the games... Pfffttt!) evil4

And it's practically a religion.

Have you ever noticed that if you say to someone living in Canada “Did you watched the game last night?” they will automatically know that you are talking about hockey? I tried that little experience in Boston the last time I was there and the answers I got were far different. “Oh, you mean the Celtics game? Or maybe the Red Sox ? It can’t be the Patriots, since their season is over…” Not quite the same wouldn't you say?
There is a simple reason for this. Here in Canada, hockey is not a sport: it’s a religion.

Hockey-Ism: A New Religion by Alexandra Giubelli

And now I've gone entirely off-topic. confused1

As you were.