This is the story I couldn’t write about for my English Comp class. The professor assigned my class to write about an event that changed our lives. 

I couldn’t write about what I really wanted to write about. I couldn’t hand in the story I’m about to write. I can only imagine how she would’ve reacted if she had read this story. Or how I would’ve been judged if any of my classmates had seen what I wanted to write.

Instead of this story, I wrote about a time I volunteered to feed the homeless. I would say it was an experience that I’ll remember for a long time, but it wasn’t the event that changed my life.

The event in question happened one summer night, not too long after I broke up with a guy I had dated for two years. Or you could say it was a mutual breakup. He was a senior and going away to college at the end of that summer. He didn’t want to be tied down to one girl…specifically me. He never said that, but it showed by the way he treated me that last month and the way he looked at other women.

The event in question was after a party—or, really, I should say, a 'get-together'. It wasn’t a full-blown party, just a bunch of us hanging out a house where there were no adults. There was alcohol there, but I was far from intoxicated. 

I can’t say that for all the guests. I remember two of my girl friends making out in the middle of the dining room. They were kissing and touching each other in ways that friends shouldn’t. I’ll admit I liked watching the show, maybe almost as much as the guys that were staring and cheering.

At some point, almost everyone else left except me, the guy who drove me there, and the guy who lived there. We were hanging out on the couch, maybe almost about to leave. I was sitting in between both of them.

I  remember the way the guys were looking at me. They were taking in the cleavage that escaped from my skimpy tank top. I felt almost naked in the short shorts I was wearing that summer night. 

I liked the way they were looking at me. Don’t get me wrong, it was intimidating, but I liked it. They were both a little bit older and both of them were what I would describe as hot. Having them look at me like that created a warmth within me, to be completely honest.

It was more than a warmth. It was a lust. It was enough to make my brain stop working… or maybe it started working in a different way.

“I’m horny.” I didn’t plan on saying it. The words had just slipped out of my unconscious brain and out my mouth. I instantly wanted to take it back. I could feel my cheeks becoming red.

They both stopped and looked at me. 

I didn’t know what to say or do. I wanted to get up and run out of there. But I didn’t. I was horny. I’d gone from having sex all the time with my ex to nothing at all. Even when things were going bad, we still had sex almost every day, sometimes more than once. I made him wait three months, but after that, it had almost been non-stop. 

“Are you serious?” Nick asked. He was muscular with brown hair and dark-colored eyes.

I nodded my head yes. “I want to get fucked.” I’d never talked like this, even with my ex. 

“Show us you’re serious,” Alex said. He was tall with black hair and bad boy looks.

“How should I do that?” I asked, my voice was soft even though I was trying to force myself to sound sexy and confident.

“I have some ideas,” Nick said.

“Take off your top,” Alex said like it was a dare. He said it like he wasn’t sure if I would do it.

They both had their eyes glued on me. At another party a week earlier, I had pulled up my shirt and flashed my bra-covered breasts on a dare from a girl friend, but this was different. That had been more playful, more silly. Yeah there had been some naughtiness to it and I was turned on by the way the guys in the room had looked at me, but this was different. This was full of bad intentions. It felt like if I did it, it was crossing a line. There would be no turning back.

I hesitated with a million thoughts running through my brain. My heart was pounding. Then I did it. I grabbed the bottom of my tank top and pulled it up and over my head.

I wore a grey push-up bra, I wish I had worn one of my sexier bras, but the guys didn’t care. I saw lust in their eyes as they took me in. I didn’t feel too curvy or even chubby the way I sometimes felt. I felt sexy. I felt like I was their private Playboy model.

“Take off your shorts,” Alex said quickly, like he didn’t want to lose the momentum that had started.

This was a bad idea. If I did that, I knew where it was going to lead. I’d only been with three guys, I knew if I took off my shorts, it was going to lead to something more. It would almost double that number instantly.

More than that, was I that kind of girl? I was far from a virgin by any means. But mostly with the one guy. I had dated him for almost two years and there had been a lot of sex. The guys before him I could count on my fingers how many times I had sex with each of them. 

And of course, that had always been one-on-one sex. I’d heard the story about Jessica. She was one of my classmates. Once, a bra was taped up on the school’s hallway wall. Word spread quickly about who owned the black bra and what she had done with two guys at a party where she lost that bra. 

“I would never do that,” I said to one of my friends. But I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t think about what it would’ve been like to be her that night. I fantasized about it. It felt so dirty to imagine, yet it turned me on. I heard rumors about other girls. I imagined the stories were true and to be them.

“You can’t tell anyone,” I said to Alex and Nick.

They both nodded in agreement. 

“Of course not,” Alex said.

I don’t know if I believed them or just that I was so horny I wasn’t thinking straight. I undid the button on my denim shorts and pushed them down. I was wearing a black thong. 

When my shorts were off, I didn’t know what was going to happen next. 

Alex undid his jeans and pushed them and his boxers down. His semi-hard cock was impossible to miss. 

“I’d love to get my cock sucked.”

“Okay,” I said with a giggle, like it was no big deal. I tried to act like this wasn’t my first time in a situation like this.

As I moved to my knees in front of the couch, Nick took off his shorts and then moved to where I had been sitting. It was like he was lining up for his turn. Was this really happening? I could still stop. But I didn’t want to do that.

I moved between Alex’s legs. I was so nervous. I was afraid to look at either of them.

I put my hand around the base of his cock and lowered my head to it. The room was silent and my heart was pounding. I took him in my mouth. I was almost trembling. I had to force myself to not do that.

I slid my lips down and his cock started to fill my mouth. I pulled my lips back, then slid them back down. It felt like any other blowjob I had given before that night, but it wasn’t.

I reached toward Nick and took his cock in my hand. It felt so dirty, so taboo to do that. Yet it was empowering. I was pleasuring two guys at once. 

Alex was still growing. I could slide my lips down to my hand a few times before it became too much. He became hard between my soft, wet lips.

I sat up and leaned over towards Nick. He was already rock hard. With butterflies in my stomach, I took that hardness between my lips. There was no going back. I would always be that girl who gave two guys blowjobs at the same time. I hoped they would keep it a secret.

“Oh god,” Nick said. 

I didn’t go slow; I bobbed up and down on his cock. I enjoyed the feeling of his hard, thick shaft sliding between my lips over and over.

When I sat up to catch my breath, I didn’t immediately go over to Alex. I took both of their cocks in my hands. They looked at me like I was a pornstar. I felt like I was one.

From that point on, I went back and forth, trying to give them an equal amount of attention from my mouth. I was still so fucking horny, but I was enjoying this. I wanted to make them both cum with my mouth. Yet before that happened, Alex spoke up. “Let’s go to my bedroom.”

I knew what the implications of that were. I wasn’t sure I was ready for that, but I let go of their cocks and stood up.