Sitting in a cold room agonizing over the exact curvature of his lips, should they be more angular and hard or more giving and soft?   His eyes should be a piercing blue that could cause a woman to lose her very thoughts.   His body should be hard yet soft enough to give when she curled up next to his heat on a cold wintry night like tonight.

              Macayla, Mac to all her friends, sat pondering the image in her head.   She could see him perfectly, as she had always been able to do since their first encounter.   His image had haunted her for the past four years.   The last time she had seen him was at their wedding reception.   Two men had come in black suits to give him orders to be ready to leave within the hour, to parts unknown.   Mac had been crushed but she had done her best to put up a brave face for Colin.   She didn’t want him to see her cry in pain like that.   He had told her that he would be back before she ever got a chance to miss him and he would make up their wedding night to her as soon as he came back home.   His parting kiss had left her aching and hurting.  

            The only reason she was sure he was still alive was because she still continued to get his paycheck deposited in to their account, by the government.   No one had ever come to her door to tell her he was missing or hurt or killed so she took the continual paychecks as her sign that he was okay where ever he was.    Mac knew he was a solider but she wasn’t sure exactly what he did and he never talked about it.               Tomorrow would be their five-year anniversary.   She had never received word from him in all that time and once more she would celebrate it alone here at home.   Tonight she was trying once more to work on her romance novel about Colin, but without the proper experience she found it difficult to put any true feeling and meaning behind her words.   The Playboy and Hustler movies she had watched just weren’t enough to give a physical and emotional understanding behind the words.   She had been faithful to Colin for five years and she planned on being faithful to him until either he returned to her whole or she received a flag on her front door step.   Her heart constricted at the second thought.             Before she could begin to feel too sorry for herself Mac decided to take a relaxing bubble bath and curl up on the satin sheets she had bought for the first anniversary and laid out on the King sized bed every year after that in hopes Colin would return to her and they could finally begin their life together. ******             How could she?   He was in a rage after being told that she had been screwing his best friend while he was away fighting for his country’s freedom.   She had pledged her self to him before God and witnesses that she would be loyal and faithful, and the instant he had turned his back his “best friend” and his wife had backstabbed him.   Some friend! Some wife!   He knew he should stay away until he got his emotions under better control, but he wanted to end this farce before he was embarrassed even farther.                He had looked forward to his wedding night almost five years ago, he had known then that his wife was a virgin and he would be her first and last lover.   It both aroused and scared him to know that.   To know he was going to be the only man to ever touch her lush body intimately aroused him but to take her innocence away scared him, he had never had a virgin before and it scared him to think he might cause her pain.   She had told him not to worry it couldn’t be that bad he only smiled at that.               She had been in her early twenties when he had left her there in the reception hall saddened, well apparently not saddened enough for her to keep to her vows.   He had thought of her the whole time he was off helping to save his country.   He had thought of getting to love and hold and caress her silky skin and taste her too.   He had seen her naked before they were married and he had even convinced her one time to let him take a picture of her naked so he could keep it in his wallet for times when he would be called away.   She had shyly agreed, he had spent many nights looking at the picture and imagining her wrapping her long lush legs around his hips as he drove into her over and over giving them both the ultimate in pleasure.   Now, he thought, she doesn’t wrap her legs around me but around another man.   His mind was racing with ways to get even with her, he had no intention of sinking to her level and breaking his marriage vows he had held them up for five long lonely years there was no way he would break them now just for revenge.   A dark smile crossed his lips and his blue eyes glittered with a way in which he could finally have his wife and get his revenge on her as well. ******             Mac had soaked in the tub until the water had turned chilly then she had turned the shower on to rinse off the last of the soapy suds that clung to her body.    She had lost weight since she had been married.   She had lost a lot of her voluptuous-ness and had ended up trading in her curves for a more slender figure.   Her breasts where still full, and rounded, her hips, thighs, and butt where much smaller and not as soft as they had been the last time Colin had touched her.   She wondered vaguely if he would approve of her changes or even find her desirable anymore.   She sighed at her wandering thoughts and slid on to the sheets still naked and damp from her bath. ******             Colin let himself into the house, everything was so quiet, no lights where on suggesting that Macayla had already gone to bed.   He had never really been able to call her Mac, it was a guys name and she with her soft curves was anything but a guy.   Colin crept down the hallway to the master bedroom where the bathroom light still shone in to the room, softly lighting up the bed, where Macayla laid, naked with her dark hair fanned out across her back, Colin’s groin tightened at the sight.   She had made this too easy for him to do.   He striped out of his clothes and tossed them on the floor as quickly and quietly as possible.   He got in to the big bed and felt the satiny cool fabric rub against his heated flesh.   He could have groaned at the feeling of a real bed and real sheets, but he resisted the urge to do so since he didn’t want to wake up his victim until later.             Before Colin could reach for Mac she rolled over and opened her legs as if she knew he was there.   Her prone body on the bed was too much for him.   He knew she was no longer a virgin so he didn’t worry about hurting her anymore.   He rubbed his fingers over her soft pink petals of femininity, and felt her get wet like she used to do when he would touch her like this.   Colin slipped in between her legs and felt her body give under him as he slammed in to her body and began to devour her lips with his.             Mac woke up instantly and tried to fight her attacker off, until she realized it was Colin, she looked at his face contorted in a look that showed both pleasure and pain.   She was in pain but she couldn’t seem to get him to stop or slow down long enough for her to get used to him being inside her.   Her virgin flesh had ripped and even now he was causing her pain unlike any she had known.   His own body stiffened once he realized what had just happened, and he called himself ten kinds of a fool for believing the rumors.   She crawled out from under him and scurried to the bathroom to slam the door and cry out her frustration and pain alone.     This was not the man she had married five years ago the man she had married was not rough and selfish like the one laying on her bed.   He had hurt her physically and emotionally.    Mac had never known Colin to be anything but careful with her even when they wrestled in the living room he had been careful not to pin her too hard or rough her up too much.   He had always been considerate of her body’s needs and wants, even though they hadn’t actually made love they had spent many hours exploring each other’s bodies hungry for every touch caress and taste.               Colin couldn’t believe it; he had been told she had been seeing his best friend on the sly while he was away.   And yet she had been untouched, he had felt her inner tissues rip under his thrusts as he had slammed in to her fragile body.   He had felt her cry and whimper but once he was buried inside her like that he had lost all thought and feeling.   By no means was she his first woman, but she was his first virgin and his last one too.   He couldn’t believe that she had still been untouched.   He felt like the lowliest of men right then he had taken her like an animal on the sheets with no regard for her pleasure or needs, he had climaxed but it was a hollow empty feeling he felt not a feeling that a man should have after making love to the woman he loved.               Colin could hear Mac crying in the bathroom and it tugged at his heart to know that she was in there crying because of him.   He had hurt her and now he had to hope she would let him try to fix it.             Mac was so busy crying on the floor she never heard the bathroom door open or Colin walking over to her; but she felt him touch her and she cringed away from him.   Colin groaned and slid his arms under her to pick her up.   She was much smaller and lighter now than she had been five years ago, he preferred her body to be softer and fuller, but if she was happy then so was he.   She pushed against him and tried to wriggle away but he just tightened his hold on her, not wanting to drop her.   He took her back to their bed where he gently laid her down on the bed and pulled the covers up over her chilly naked flesh.   He went back in to the bathroom and got a wet washcloth and a small hand towel.   When he came back she was curled up in a tight ball on the bed looking like a doe caught in the headlights.   He gently pulled the covers down her body and saw the small flecks of blood on the inside of her thighs.   He groaned in pain at the way he had taken her so brutally, and so unfeeling.   He gently wiped away the marks on her thighs and moved up to sooth the ripped flesh with the cool cloth.   She lay there unmoving and barely breathing.   He dried her skin and returned the towels back to the bathroom.   Colin got back into bed with Mac and pulled her stiff body up next to his.   She didn’t fight him she just laid there stiff and unmoving; it tore at his heart like nothing else in the world could have.            Colin rubbed her back gently and whispered in her ear “I am so sorry.   Macayla will you let me make it up to you.   Please.”   She heard the soft pleading in his voice but she couldn’t get past the way he had just treated her.   How dare he force her, rip her and then ask her to let him touch her again.   He had to be dreaming.   Mac began to struggle against his hold.   Colin rolled her over on to her back and pinned her body under his and pressed up to look down in to her face.   Colin saw the tears running down her cheeks and the stubborn set of her chin. Mac finally quit struggling against his hold when she realized that he wasn’t going to let her go.   She turned her face away from him and continued to cry some more.   She knew he didn’t like to see her cry, but she was still raw and sore from his abuse to her body and emotions.   At that moment in time she didn’t give a damn if she upset him she was hurting, she wanted him to hurt too because he had done this to her. Colin rolled over on to his back and took Mac with him and wrapped his legs around hers to help pin her to his body.   He could feel the shuddering and crying as she tried to compose her self.   He knew and understood her intolerance of weakness especially in herself.   She rarely cried and only when provoked did she let the floodgates open like this.   “Macayla?” “Just go away and leave me alone.”   Her voice was muffled slightly by his chest. “No, never.   Will you let me explain?” “Why? So you can apologize for losing it after five years and that you didn’t mean it and that you won’t ever use my body that way again…you’re right you won’t I want a divorce I will not be married to a man who would treat me this way.   You aren’t the man I fell madly in love with and married.”   Her voice was whisper soft but razor sharp. “You can’t have a divorce.   And I had been told you where sleeping with Jack, so you weren’t suppose to be a virgin anymore.” “Jack??!!   You thought I was sleeping with your best friend?”   The furry Colin heard in her voice made him smile.   “You self absorbed bastard.   How could you think such a thing I married you and I remained faithful to you all five years you have been gone.” Mac pushed against his chest and tried to move off of his coaxing warm body.   Colin just tightened his arms and legs around her refusing her even an inch of movement.   “Go to sleep little one, we’ll talk in the morning.   You have my word I won’t touch you like that until after we talk…deal?”   “Your word is it?   You really are an arrogant bastard I want nothing to do with you…so if you’ll let me go I’ll sleep in the extra bedroom tonight and leave as soon as I can get my bags packed.” “Like hell you’ll leave, you belong to me.   We both need to rest and rationally talk this over.   I made a grave mistake let me make it up to you.    Sleep with me tonight and tomorrow we can decide what we will do with our marriage.” Mac struggled against his grip some more and realized he wasn’t going to let her go she settled down and began to drift off into slumber once more in his arms as she had done hundreds of times before.   Colin allowed his body to relax under hers as he felt sleep take over her softening body.   ****** Colin awoke with a start.   Mac was gone.   Then he heard a soft rummaging noise in the bathroom.   He quickly and quietly got out of bed and stalked over to the connecting bathroom door.   Leaning against the jamb he watched Mac pack her stuff in to a little piece of baby blue satin and lace bag, he remembered giving it to her because it reminded him of her so much, very soft and beautiful but strong enough to endure.   Mac turned and gazed up at him with diamond tears streaming down her face.   She mumbled something he didn’t hear.   Stretching out to cover the doorway and pinning her into the small bathroom. “Please move so I can finish quickly and be out of your way.” “No.” it was barely spoken but carried a thread of steel in it just the same.

“No?” “No.   You know that word I used to hate cause all I wanted was to slide between your silky thighs and pleasure you till you screamed.   No. Remember that word?” “Uh-Huh, well move I plan on seeing a lawyer today.   I will not be married to a man who physically abuses me nor to a man who thinks so low of me that I would sleep with his best friend.” Her eyes were flashing, her voice grew huskier and her cheeks flushed with anger.   Colin found himself getting aroused anger and passion were close emotions.   Mac noticed his hardening body and slowly backed away.    Mac’s insides flipped and clenched at the sight of her naked husband.   When Colin had left he had been softer but now he was whipcord lean and muscular.   She could see that he was in a state of semi-arousal.   She could see the heated desire in his eyes and could almost feel the heat radiating from his body.             Colin stepped in the bathroom and closed the door.   A slow grin spread across his sensuous lips causing Mac to back up a step only to realize she was standing in the shower.   Colin slowly advanced towards her. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?” “Because I want you.” “Well people in hell want ice water.” Colin laughed a rich rumble that ran through his chest and throat.   He loved her quick wit and sharp tongue.   He also loved what that tongue could do to him.   The thought of it all made him more aroused.   Mac noticed. “Stay away.” “You used to love what I did to you.” “Yeah well that was before last night.” “Macayla, you have no idea how badly I feel about that, please just let me hold you in my arms, no sex, just comfort.   Please.” “Why?” “I love the feel of you and I love you. Let me make it all up to you and if you still want a divorce…you can have it.”   The last was dragged out of him, and he knew the words were a lie the moment he thought them.   He loved her dearly and he would do anything for her to make her happy but she would always remain his no matter what. Mac knew she loved him and she didn’t wish to throw away the last seven years of her life because of one night and a mistake.   She knew she would make him pay for his mistake.   Mac stretched her hand out to Colin.   He took her fingers in his hands and brought them to his lips were he proceeded to kiss each finger while looking her in the eye.   She shivered in response remembering what it was like to have his hands and lips on other pieces of her body. Pulling her closer to him she snuggled against his chest and wrapped her arms around his neck holding him tightly.   He kissed the top of her head and she began to cry once more.   A tiny grin touched Colin’s lips as he picked her up.   Instinctively her legs wrapped around his waist clinging to him as tightly as possible.   He opened the bathroom door and walked on towards the bed. Colin leaned over the bed and laid Mac down in to the sheets, before standing back up.   Then he began to unbutton her jeans.   “I thought you said no sex.” “I did and I mean it but I love you naked in my arms.” He continued to strip off her pants and panties then returned to strip off her black tee shirt.   Revealing a black lace bra that was an erotic contrast to the ivory skin it cradled.   Colin loved it but removed it all the same wanting only their skin to touch.   He quickly got into bed and reached for her, but as always she moved in to his arms before he could reach her.   She snuggled close to him and closed her eyes feeling safe once more.              Hours had passed since Mac had fallen asleep, and in that time Colin’s craving for her had grown.   Her skin was a warm silk that he couldn’t stop touching.   She smelled of sweet roses and vanilla; with Mac it was always something simple and sensual.   No expensive designer colognes for her, just lotions and oils.   Mac snuggled deeper in to his embrace rubbing her soft bottom against his already throbbing hardness.   He groaned slightly as Mac’s body began to stretch, a habit of hers when she began to wake up. Colin nuzzled her neck savoring her softness as she murmured soft pleasure sounds.   Colin allowed his hand to stroke her stomach and the sensitive spot just below there that made her body tremble slightly with arousal, Colin’s hands continued to trace her there, feeling her tremble under his finger tips.   Mac understood his intentions and knew he would succeed if she didn’t stop him soon.   She tried to pull away but Colin stopped her and whispered.   “No, let me, you know you love it when I touch you, I want you hot, wet, and begging me to slide between your thighs to ease the ache burning inside you.” Colin allowed his fingers to slide down the last remaining inches to find the junction of her thighs.   Slowly sliding a finger between her soft lips he groaned at finding her already moist and warm.   Mac’s hips jerked in pleasure as a soft cry escaped from her lips.   “That’s it, open for me.” Colin was answered with gasps and cries as his fingers played over her weeping softness.   Mac clawed at his hand, digging her nails into his muscular flesh.   Continuing to nuzzle Mac’s neck, Colin slid his magical fingers deeper among her dewy petals to the velvety warmth he desired.   Mac’s whimpers and sighs caused a fire in his blood, wanting to give her more and take everything in return. Colin slid his fingers into her burning opening and tugged on her ear before breathing “Mine.” Into her flesh.   His possessiveness over her body was deeply and thrillingly arousing to her making her ache and burn for more of him.   Her body shuddered in ecstasy as he slid his fingers deeper into her satin flower.   Mac trembled more violently against him. “Come for me baby, come on.   You are so tight and wet you make me so hard.   I want to be right here inside you.” Between his words and actions Mac screamed her release. “Yes baby. Be wild for me.” Mac’s cries slowly became soft whimpers while Colin gentled her into his hands.   He rolled her on to her back and kissed her stomach.   Her muscles shivered in response to his delicate touch. Mac had forgotten the kind of true ecstasy Colin could bring her with just the flick of his fingers.   Colin slid up along her body making sure that his aroused flesh caressed every inch of her thigh and hip. Mac uttered a small gasp at the pulsing feel of him.   Colin allowed his fingers to wander back down to her sleek softness lightly touching her weak point that would make her shudder again in ecstasy.   “Tell me you want me.”   His masculine voice smoothed over her.   Mac responded with a whimper and a jerky nod of her head. “That’s not good enough,” his words flowed over her like warm honey. “you have to say the words.” Mac bit her lower lip and nearly screamed when he touched her with a careless flick of his finger. “I wa-want-you.” Her voice shook and choked as he continued to love her with his fingers.   Colin rolled away from her on to his back. “But…” “Shhh—come here.” Colin helped to ease her up on top of him then gently pushed her in to a sitting position so her thighs straddled his hips. “This way I don’t hurt you.”   Mac’s body was flushed and heated in embarrassment and arousal.   Colin helped to guide her to her desired position before holding her hips steady and moving back and forth so she felt the tip of his hardness against her velvet sheath.   Mac slowly lowered her hips down until she could feel her lips just barely kissing the head of his more than ready erection.   She could feel her lips open up to gently stretch and suckle on him.   She slid down lower on to his pulsing hardness, arching her back to take him deeper inside of her begging warmth.   A shudder coursed through her, Colin’s hands stroked her sides calming her and encouraging her to continue.   He was only half in her and it was driving him mad.   He moved his hips up while pulling hers closer down on to him.   Fully sheathed inside her satiny warmth Colin groaned at the tight fit of her body wrapped around his.   Colin let Mac sit on him without pushing her for more, even though his body was demanding she move so he could drive to his own release and soon.    He wasn’t made of iron, but he knew her body would still be sensitive from his first taking of her.   Mac clenched and unclenched her flesh around his hot hardness trapped inside her.   She felt him throb in response to her ministrations.   She could feel him rub inside her tightness, and shivered in response, causing her hips to slide against him.   The friction of him moving inside of her forced a whimper out of her lips.   Mac began to move her hips up and down causing a greater friction.   For Colin she didn’t move fast enough.   He grabbed her hips, digging his fingers into her softness while holding her hips still while he surged in and out of her beckoning heat.    Her inner muscles suckled on his manhood demanding more and more from him as he demanded more of her softness.   Her body grew hotter as she began to melt into his body, while his own body grew harder and hotter.   Sweat broke out all over their bodies as his groans of pleasure mingled with her cries of ecstasy as their bodies reached and grabbed the heavens in the ultimate pleasure.   Mac’s body fused with Colin’s as the seemingly chilly air washed over her still heated and flushed skin.   Colin ran his hands down her silky back feeling her shiver in response. “Cold, or pleasure? “Both but mostly pleasure.” He moved his semi-aroused flesh in her once more before sliding out of her and then rolling her on to her back and pinning her to the bed with his body.   His face took on a hard edge and his eyes grew cold as he looked at her. “Repeat after me” Mac grinned up at him but he only stared icily back at her. “Okay” “I love my husband” “I love my husband” “I belong to him from now until forever.” “I belong to him from now until forever.” Colin leaned down and began to kiss her lips.   Her lips melted into his with the first sensation.   Their lips and tongues mated and played with one another as their newly sensitive bodies rubbed against each other making them hot once more.   Colin leaned down to nuzzle once more on Mac’s neck.   She pushed on his chest and he eased up some of his weight off of her.   His lips still gliding and caressing her neck.   Mac pushed against him once more and he looked down in to her eyes.     “Get off of me.” “No.”   A boyish grin flashed onto his lips. “Yes, I want you on your back.” “You’ve already had me that way time for something new.” “But I want to do something else.” Highly curious by the gleam of light in her eyes, Colin slid off of her body and on to his back once more.   Mac proceeded to get out of the bed.   “Hey get back here you can’t leave.” “I’ll be right back…. I promise.” Colin folded his hands behind his head and let her leave knowing he would go and fetch her if she was gone for too long.   Two minutes had passed and for Colin it was two minutes too long.   He stammered out of bed and began to wander through the house looking for his wayward wife.   He found her in the kitchen.   Sensing Colin’s presence Mac turned and looked at him.   She smiled coyly and went over to the padded chair and gently patted it and crooked her finger at him.   Colin eagerly went to find out what she had in store for him this time.   “Sit.” Colin immediately sat down in the chair.   Mac ran her nails over his shoulders and down his chest.   Colin loved that feeling.   She stopped touching him and when he opened his eyes he saw her kneeling between his legs with an ice cube in her fingers. “You wouldn’t” She only smiled at him as she touched his hard thick arousal with the melting ice cube.   He groaned in pain at the feel of the freezing ice on his burning skin.   She quickly removed the tormenting ice cube from him and began to suckle that spot of his arousal with her lips. The contradiction in heat and cold aroused him even more.   Mac felt him grow harder in her mouth.   She suckled on his hardness drawing on him with her lips and tongue trying to taste all of him at once.   She slid her warm wet mouth down his shaft and suckled a little harder on him trying to make him as aroused as possible.   Colin’s hips jerked in reaction and he groaned loudly at her insistent lickings.   Mac loved the feel of him in her mouth and the taste was the sweetest ambrosia. She had never done this to him in the past she had always been so shy with him.   Her lips were insistent in their quest of and she demanded his surrender to her.   She suckled more and more on him while she carefully stroked and caressed his sac gently lifting them and rubbing them in her fingers.   She loved knowing he was enjoying her touches. Colin was half mad with desire her fingers on his sac drove him crazy, partly because she had never really touched that part of him and partly because she was still suckling on his rigid manhood.   He felt his body quicken in response to her and knew that if she didn’t stop soon he would come in her mouth.   Mac felt the change in his body and worked him over even more with her lips as she sighed and moaned against him wanting more and taking everything from him he offered.   Colin felt the last remnants of his control slip as he began to shudder with the beginning signs of climax.   He couldn’t stop himself, he ran his fingers into her hair and held her there while his body contracted in a deep orgasm.   His body shivered as she suckled on him more and more.   He looked at her with her rosy lips around his shaft and her lips tugging on him.   The sight was erotic, and then she did the unexpected as he continued to climax she began to swallow his seed.   Colin’s climax intensified in that moment.   Finally Colin’s body spent its self and he slumped in the chair.   Mac’s lips remained on his shaft but only lightly as she gently suckled some more to make sure she got everything from him.   She looked up at Colin and saw his glazed eyes as they focused on her through a haze of desire.   “I love you.” “I love you too” Mac carefully climbed into his lap and sat astride his hips and leaned her head on his comforting shoulder before licking his neck and then kissing his lips softly and slowly.   “If you keep that up, we need to go back to bed.” Mac’s only response was to gently bite his ear and lick the sting away