She scratched my back with her long sexy nails that she had painted black.

It really hadn’t sunk-in

What she wanted to do with that pumpkin.

Did I mention my wife’s a witch?

Not a bitch, a real-life witch.

I cheated on her last year

When she found out she said, “You will pay my dear”.

A year went by, and I figured, I had nothing to fear, the coast was clear!

Never once thought she would shove a pumpkin…in my rear.