I'd rather be lonely alone, than lonely with somebody else...

I've decided over time
and mishaps just the same
that although I ache for companionship
I can be alone if and when the time came

Like an unattended orchid
my emotions are left to die
As if I had crawled in a blackened hole
I feel alone and didn't know why

As if I’m a used toy doll
I’m tossed away and never once caught
Broken and shattered my heart lay
abused as my love and respect are lost

Feelings of hope and freedom has been stolen
future dreams ignored and never cherished
I would lay curled up next to him at night
and felt nothing but embarrassed

Shameful I can’t earn the love
regretful I had once tried
Laying next to him, but suddenly alone
It seemed the night would not end without my cry.

Not understanding this as negative
just accepting life as it must be
Until the day hit where I surrendered
without him there was so much more to see

That was the day that I decided
no more tears coming from these eyes
I'd rather be lonely alone
than lonely with you by my side.