I was getting in line at the airport when I saw Kim, who had her arm around another woman, a striking blonde. I kept half-an-eye on them and was more than a little surprised when they kissed before Kim boarded the plane ahead of me. The blonde passed me by and I saw her wedding ring and realized it was the same one as Kim wears. “Kim is a lesbian?” I thought.
I wasn’t overly shocked, just surprised. Kim and I have worked together for several years and while we have a great professional relationship, we weren’t overly close away from work. I guess I have always just assumed that she was married, but also assumed no children because while she was in her early thirties, there was no way that body turned out a couple of kids! I’ve seen her in a bikini.
It was on another trip and we ended up having to spend an extra night at a hotel that had a mall attached to it. So what do two women do with an extra evening and no business commitments do? We went shopping! I picked up a new pair of shoes and this really cute top. Kim bought a dress and a new bathing suit. She tried to talk me into one, but I wasn’t much of a swimmer. Early that evening she talked me into dinner at the hotel on the veranda overlooking the pool.
She met me in the lobby wearing a wrap-around skirt and her new suit. We enjoyed dinner and sat back drinking some wine at a table next to the pool when she decided to swim. When she stood and dropped the skirt, I saw several faces turn in appreciation. Slim, toned, long limbs, and looking more like a model than a requirements engineer. She slipped into the water and started doing laps.
It was easy to see how she stayed so slim, she knifed through the water, covering the length of the pool in three or four strokes and then executed a perfect kick-turn. I don’t remember how many laps she did, but I would have been panting for breath after just one or two. I wasn’t in horrible shape, but my exercise choice was running and biking, my legs were strong, but my upper body wouldn’t have been able to keep up with her.
When she got out of the pool, her list of admirers had grown and several men made to approach her, but she waved them off with a small motion and a smile. No one pushed the issue, which was nice, but it was early and no one had hit the bar too heavily yet.
Okay, that was one trip. This one was a different one. We were giving a presentation and were relaxing in my hotel room before heading out to dinner. We were on the couch in my room and were feeling pretty good because the day’s meetings went pretty well.
“I saw you at the airport, your… wife… is pretty spectacular,” I said matter-of-factly.
Kim smiled slightly, “She is great, her name is Kelly and she is legally my wife in this state, if not yet all of them.”
“I wasn’t prying, I was just surprised. I thought you were single.”
“I was, until about a year ago. We’ve been friends forever and when they finally legalized gay marriage, we took the plunge.”
“You never mentioned it,” I said thoughtfully.
“No, I don’t advertise. I figure it's private and I try and keep it that way. Some of the idiots we work with would get even more idiotic about it.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t say anything to anyone, I was just surprised when I saw the ring.” I looked down at it on her finger.
Kim raised an eyebrow, as she held up her hand, looking at her ring. “Yes, they are traditional wedding bands, Kelly designed them, a Celtic design.”
There was a lull in the conversation. Then she asked, “So are you married?”
“For about ten years. Why have we never talked about personal stuff? I mean we’ve been working hard together but never seemed to connect before?”
“Well, like I said, being a lesbian freaks some folks out, so I tend to keep personal stuff personal. Lots of folks can’t relate. For example, how many girls have you ever kissed?”
“I can honestly say I have never kissed a girl.”
“Never?” Kim asked with a surprised look on her face.
“Never!”
“Let me get this straight. You went to college, right?”
“And grad school!” I added.
“You were athletic and played on any number of teams?”
“Oh yea, field hockey, softball, track, even sailing.” I listed it for her.
“These were all women groups, often coached by other women, right?”
“Yes, nearly 100% female,” I confirmed.
“And you have never even kissed a girl, let alone did more?”
I replied, “Nope, never. Never had the urge. Even when some of the girls did, it was never my thing.”
It was strange admitting that. I had never given it any thought before. I knew a lot of girls who were into girls, especially in college. While I never really paid that much attention to them, I wasn’t drawn to any of them. Now that I think about it, I think my roommate in college was… interested in being more than a roommate, but it didn’t sink in until just now. Kim was so straightforward about it — like kissing girls was something every girl did.
Suddenly Kim did something that surprised me, she slid closer to me on the couch. I wasn’t sure why, but suddenly the room got warmer. Then she leaned in very close, stopping so close to my face. I knew she was stunning, but this close she was even more beautiful. Her face was so smooth, she rarely wore much make-up and her natural look was just amazing. I inhaled slowly, trying to understand why my heart was beating faster. This was Kim right in front of me, one of my favorite people for so many reasons.
“What are you doing?” I asked quietly.
“I’m going to kiss you.” She said it like it was the most normal thing in the world.
“But you are married?”
“It’s only a kiss. This way if the topic comes up, you can honestly say you have kissed a girl.”
I didn’t know what to do but leaving felt wrong. Kim reached up and touched my face. It was like a gossamer touch, so light and yet it felt sensual. I didn’t know what I was feeling, I couldn’t make heads or tails as she looked at me like she was seeing me for the first time. She stroked my cheek lightly, but I couldn’t tear my eyes from hers.
Like usual, I tried to make things a bit lighter. That’s my normal defense mechanism, try and turn everything into a joke and I said, “I thought you were going to kiss me?” She took a moment to respond while she continued to look at me. I think she saw through my comment and didn’t take it as humor.
“Oh, I am. I’m just taking my time and enjoying this. I might never have this chance again and want to make the most of it.” Then she took my defense mechanism and turned it against me, “Besides, I hope you weren’t expecting a peck on the cheek?”
I had no expectations of anything. This whole conversation felt surreal, but here Kim was right in front of me, touching my soul as well as my cheek and I didn’t know what I should do. I decided to not treat her comment like it was to lighten things up. “I didn’t expect anything at all!”
I felt a slight blush warming my face as I said it. I broke eye contact and looked at her lips, lips so close to mine. I wasn’t panicked or ever nervous, I didn’t know what I was feeling. I looked back up at her eyes and was caught again.
Without me realizing it right away, our lips touched. I was kissing a girl, well, at that moment it was more being kissed by a girl. I felt her tongue touch my lips and then slip into my mouth. Our heads tilted slightly at the same time as if we had done this before. It felt so different, so soft and yet so firm at the same time.
When I felt her tongue, I couldn’t help responding. It wasn’t just a kiss, it was a connection and one I’d never felt before. For an instant, I thought of my husband, but then the moment overwhelmed me and I realized my eyes were closed. Without realizing it, Kim was also in my arms and the kiss deepened more than I thought possible.
The kiss ended and she pulled back just a hair and then kissed the corner of my mouth. As I opened my eyes and saw her again, I felt like there should have been an aura around her, at least something more than normal.
Without a word, she stood and look at me. “Before we talk about this, you have to kiss me the next time.” I was confused at her words.
“Now you can say you have kissed a girl. If you want to talk or anything else, you have to kiss me, and not just a quick touch of the lips. Think about it and decide for yourself.” She looked at me in a way I couldn’t decipher. It dawned on me, she wanted me! It wasn’t just sexual, at least it didn’t feel that way. But then she left!
I just sat there, not sure what to do. Should I have stopped her, should I just ignore what just happened? I was confused and I think she knew it. If she had stayed, what might have happened? The very idea made me even more nervous, which was strange to me. It’s not what might have happened that made me nervous, but it hit me what I was feeling at that moment that scared me more. I sat there for a long while thinking about what just happened and only came to one decision, the only one I think I could have made!