"The first rule of Lesbian Bunny Club is: you do not talk about Lesbian Bunny Club. The second rule of Lesbian Bunny Club is: you DO NOT talk about Lesbian Bunny Club! The third rule of Lesbian Bunny Club is: remember that we are not Furries so if anyone here showed up because they were inspired by badly drawn furry porn on Deviant Art leave now before it’s too late."

The Dominatrix-looking Bunny said this before cracking her whip for enfaces.

Now you might be wondering how the fuck I got here and why exactly am I standing in a room full of Bunnies. The answer is actually pretty simple.

All my life I wanted to be an Easter Bunny. I'd get asked that question that all children get bombarded with. "Lottie, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

I always answered the same each time. “I want to be an Easter Bunny." My room was filled with Bunny nick-knacks of all kinds and the walls were completely covered in every Bunny poster imaginable and I insisted on eating carrots at every meal.

Everyone thought I would grow out of it like most girls when they give up on becoming Ballerinas and end up being a Nurse or a Teacher. Not me though. There was only one problem. It wasn't paying the bills. I was down to my last cigarette and already I was having the shakes.

To top it all off I recently got fired from the party company I worked for because there had been one too many reports about "The Unfriendly Bunny." My boss had told me several times before that I needed to, and I quote, "Give hugs not shrugs." I didn't really listen. In fact, I rolled my eyes but he didn't see because I was still wearing my mask. I always wear it even to sleep.

So when the Lucky Bitch that plays the White Rabbit at every Alice in Wonderland Party (there are a lot of them) came up to me and told me about a gig that would pay better I hopped at the chance no questions asked. She gave me the address and told me to show up on April 3rd the day before Easter.

Now here I am wondering just what the fuck I got myself into. I could have walked out with the group of disappointed furries, but I'm a sad broke Bunny and also a very curious one.

There was a long awkward silence as the leader waited for the furries to completely clear out before she began to speak again.

"Alright then, let me explain just how this works. We are an elite group of Bunnies who have formed a special club or as some might see it, a cult. There won't be any Jim Jones nonsense here, so don't worry your pretty little Bunny heads about that. We are essentially a nonstop Bunny fuck party. For women bunnies only. The only dick allowed is carrot dick," The Leather Bunny said looking around the crowded dim room that looked like some sort of mascots convention.

"Once you give yourself over to us, you never have to worry about money again. You’ll live in our Burrow, you'll eat of our Harvests, and you’ll have the love and blessings of Lola Bunny,” The Leader said gesturing to a big portrait of Lola Bunny twirling a basketball on her finger paw.

To a Bunny who was about to be living on the streets in a cardboard box, this actually sounded pretty awesome. I didn't listen to the rest of her speech. Instead, I put on my headphones and listened to my old MP3 that no one in 2021 should still own, I turned it to a One Hour version of Tight Pants Body Rolls by Leslie Hall and began my mental mind rave.

The meeting was coming to an end as the song finished. "I'll conclude with this. Tomorrow night is a very sacred time as you know. It's Easter and you'll have a chance to prove yourselves tribe worthy by the light of the full moon. If you feel this isn't something for you do not show up. Once you do you cannot back out under any circumstance." She cracked her whip again.

Instinctively I rolled my eyes. "How dramatic," I thought to myself smirking a little under my mask.

I slept better than I had in months. Soon I'd be worry-free with unlimited cigarettes and a face full of Easter twat. I wondered if part of the initiation tomorrow would include Pop Culture Bunny trivia.

Already I could hear them asking, “In what year was Bugs Bunny created?” to which I would reply, "Trick question! He first appeared in 1938 but it wasn't until 1940 that he was considered official." They'd be impressed with my superior Bunny knowledge.

I hoped they'd ask me about "Harvey" and "Donnie Darko" and "Watership Down." I would absolutely kill it.

The sound of loud knocking woke me from my dreams and I ran to answer the door only to find an Easter Basket filled with goodies, one of them being a new Bunny costume. Black Leather with a zipper mouth and zipper crotch. It looked like something someone from Slipknot would undoubtedly wear.

There was also a note with directions attached to it that read:

Dearest Bunny Pledge
We look forward to having you become a member of our Family
Please show up at the field located at 12°37′N 87°09′W promptly at 6 pm dressed accordingly
Once you are here you may not leave unless we say otherwise
You've been warned
Love and Bunny Kisses
Mistress Hedda H 

For a brief moment, I wondered how they got my address but then shrugged it off and began putting on the tight leather and looked in the mirror studying myself momentarily before turning to Peachfuzz my Bunny plush that had been sitting on my dresser since sometime in the 90s waiting for the magic moment when I would get my shit together. Its hard plastic eyes were filled with judgment.

"You think this is a fuckin costume? This is a way of life," I said to him.

"Lottie, I liked your other costume better," he replied.

“It was never a costume. I'm a real Bunny, like you," I said before turning him around to face the wall.

Peachfuzz always had my back. When everyone didn't believe in me he did. It was he who had told me that I should become a Bunny and now when things were finally going to work out for me he insisted on being a total twat. Maybe I wouldn't even pack him along when I moved into the Bunny Clubs Burrow. Maybe I would leave him and Roger Rabbit and Bugs. After all, they were boy Bunnies and that was against the rules.

It was hard to move around, the leather was stiff and unaccommodating, and it felt like the leather and my skins were absorbing each other and becoming one. I hoped I wouldn't have to wear this all the time. I hated to admit it but Peachfuzz was right, my other costume was better. It was like a soft warm protective home.

Six O'clock was coming up fast when I glanced at the time on my phone and hurried into my car and started driving to the coordinates listed in the note.

I felt suddenly nervous and anxious about the whole thing. Maybe I should have left a note as to where I was going or told someone but the only one who knew was Peachfuzz and he was very disapproving of this whole thing.

The directions took me deep into the country down twisted roads where the pavement vanished and turned into bumpy red clay that my car tires were unaccustomed to. The further out I got the fewer houses I saw. It was dark and empty with only the sound of coyotes howling and owls hooting to keep me company.

After what seemed to be an eternity I came to a stop at a big open field. If I had any doubt about whether or not I was in the right place it quickly faded as my eyes adjusted to the dark and spotted dozens of Leather-clad Bunnies, more so than I had seen at the orientation the night before.

There was a large bonfire crackling and a small stage with a podium. There were slings and benches with restraints that made me shiver with an equal mixture of arousal and nerves.

Soon Hedda went up to the podium and welcomed everyone and announced that it was time to begin the night's festivities.

Another Bunny stepped onto the stage and laid down, her legs spread wide, her zipper crotch open, and began rapid-firing black plastic Easter Eggs out of her gaping vagina and into the crowd who eagerly began gathering them. I reached to get one wiping it off on a nearby Bunny who didn't seem to notice.

I opened it expecting to find a piece of candy or maybe a tiny carrot-shaped butt plug but instead all I found was a piece of paper with the number 3 on it.

Hedda stepped back up to the podium after the Bunny had emptied at least fifty eggs out of her impressive and terrifying pussy and announced that towards the end of the night they would call a number and whoever’s was called would win a prize.

I found a small zippered pocket and placed the number into it for safekeeping. Maybe later I would end up winning a New TV or if luck was really on my side a Sybian. Either way, it couldn't hurt, right?

"And now Ladies it’s time for my favourite part of the night." The Hedda's voice had changed from an Ilsa She Wolf to more of a Jessica Rabbit Imitation, sultry and inviting.

She gestured to the Slings and Benches that had been moved up onto the stage.

"Pledges approach and give yourself over to us."

I felt a swarm of butterflies anxiously flapping away in my chest as I slowly began to make my way to the stage along with five other Bunnies.

"Sling or Bench?" a Bunny wearing a Carrot Strap on asked.

I weighed my options briefly and decided that with a bench I wouldn't have to face the crowd as I got rammed by this massive carrot.

"Bench." Of course, I didn't really think about how perfect a view of my Bunny cunt the audience would get.

"Is that Organic?" I suddenly found myself asking and nodding towards the girthy monster of a carrot.

"Of course,” she whispered. “I bought it at the farmer's market. Now get your cute bunny ass onto the bench and get ready for the most spiritual pounding of your life." The Bunny's voice spoke with pride.

I climbed onto the bench and closed my eyes tightly. I wasn't a carrot virgin but I had never had one that big.

"Afterwards can we go to McDonald's or maybe Taco Bell? So I won't feel like such a dirty Bunny whore?"

The Bunny sighed clearly annoyed with the fact that I wouldn't stop making things awkward.

“A Good Bunny doesn't feel shame. But fine if it makes you feel better maybe we can go get crunch wraps and Baja blasts after."

The Bunny pressed the carrot to my mouth. "Don't eat it just get it nice and wet."

I opened my mouth and began slowly licking and sucking, taking the carrot into the back of my throat like a wanton slut all the while wondering if this counted as sufficient vitamin A for the week.

The Bunny rocked her leather-clad hips forward, gagging me on the carrot repeatedly until it was dripping in saliva before moving behind me unzipping my crotch revealing my now soaked and veggie starved cunt.

With one hard push, she rammed the carrot deep inside of me with zero mercy and began pounding my cunt at a rapid pace.

As if on cue Jefferson Airplane's "White Rabbit" began to play loudly which I thought was a little cliché but then what else would a Lesbian Bunny Cult listen to while having an orgy of sorts? Nothing came to mind.

Soon my thoughts melted into an intoxicated lust-filled pleasure haze as I gasped and moaned loudly as she buried every last inch inside of me and began to grind against my velvet walls causing my cunt to begin to spasm wildly.

I looked to the side and watched as the Bunny in the sling nearest to me was DP'd by two large carrots while sucking and slurping loudly on another.

The sounds of moans and screams mixed with 60s psychedelic rock filled the night air as Bunny after Bunny hopped and humped their way into orgasmic bliss.

My Bunny thrust in and out of me slamming her veggie cock deeper and harder until I couldn't take it anymore. My cunt clung tightly to the carrot as I began to shake and squirt everywhere.

Soon the Bunny Orgy came to an end and I watched as the carrots got thrown into a big boiling pot of water and cringed a little.

I stepped off the stage and zipped up blushing a little under my mask.

The leader announced that it was time for the more dreadful part of the ceremony

"Dreadful?" I asked the Bunny that had just finished fucking me.

"The Lottery," she said before shushing me.

If you haven’t already guessed how a lottery could be dreadful I’ll tell you.

"Number 3...your number's up," Hedda shouted.

I fumbled for my zipper pocket and took it out remembering that I was 3 and that it had always been my lucky number. Like an idiot I found myself running back towards the stage that had turned more into a Slip 'N Slide.

I showed Hedda my number gleefully expecting to win something but their idea of a prize and mine it turned out was not the same.

"Ah, a pledge. How lucky for us," Hedda said as her mask was unzipped and I could see a devilish smirk forming.

"What did I win?" I asked, looking around feeling slightly weary and confused.

I didn't feel the sharp blow to my head but I did however feel the scorching bubbling water as I came to.

The other Bunnies were singing and chanting and holding hands as they swayed back and forth.

I was in the big boiling pot of water filled with the fuck carrots.

"What the fuck is this?" I asked glaring at Hedda.

"This is how we get our carrots back," she said.

"But you have carrots... " I said my voice trembling a little.

"Silly Rabbit those were store-bought non-organic carrots," she replied scornfully.

"You fucked me with a non-organic carrot?" I was officially pissed off and began picking up carrots and tossing them at everyone while trying to get out only falling back down again splashing water everywhere.

Hedda laughed as she watched me fumble around in the hot water.

"You should feel lucky Lottie, not every pledge gets this kind of a chance, it’s an honour."

“I didn't agree to be boiled alive like the Bunny in "Fatal Attraction" you fucking psycho cunt," I screamed.

"You were given several outs and still showed up," Hedda said before shaking her head as if she were speaking to the dumbest Bunny in the entire universe.

Suddenly there came a loud bang and then a boom as several Gobble Gobble Bunnies hit the ground splattering blood everywhere. The other Bunnies screamed in terror and began scattering and running for safety.

BOOM THUMP BOOM sounded as suddenly a giant metal foot stomped on several Bunnies squishing them.

My jaw dropped a little as I realized what was happening. It was Peachfuzz in a giant Mech here to rescue me.

His mech arm stretched out and yanked me out of the boiling water and sat me in the seat next to him.

“When am I going to have to stop rescuing you?" he asked steering the mech towards a cluster of terrified cultist bunnies.

"Whenever I finally get my shit together?" I said playfully nudging him.

He shook his head and continued his Bunny squashing rampage.

"Stupid motherfucking cunt waffle twat whores, you aren't even real Bunnies," Peachfuzz shouted at them.

"Wait!" I said as he began to stomp down on the last Bunny standing.

"Were we really going to go to Taco Bell or were you just saying that?" I yelled down at her.

The Bunny looked startled at the question. "Seriously you are asking about Taco Bell after almost being boiled alive then rescued by a stuffed animal in a mech who just murdered an entire cult?”

“I was actually looking forward to eating crunch wraps with you... " I said sadly.

Peachfuzz tilted his furry little head and looked at me. "Do I kill this bitch or what?"

"I promise you I had no idea you would be picked but I didn't know you wouldn't be either which is the reason I actually said maybe," The Bunny said her shoulders slumping.

"No... put her in the mech," I said.

Peachfuzz sighed and then reluctantly lifted her up into the mech and put her in the seat next to me.

"What's your name?" I asked her.

"Everyone calls me Honey but my real name is Agatha," she said cuddling in with her head on my shoulder.

We headed off into the night arguing over whether or not to go to Taco Bell or Denny's. In the end, Denny's won, and Peachfuzz ate a Moons over my Hammy while I smoked my last cigarette and Agatha attempted to quietly unzip me under the table.

"Round two?" she whispered.