The laptop screen showed the following:
Solve the following and win a prize: Lana "lost" a giggle wood.
Or …
Send in a story about your most unique sexual encounters and win a prize.
"Do you wanna enter?" Darius, eager and slightly naive at twenty-two, asked his girlfriend Leandra, impulsive yet quick-witted at twenty-seven.
"I'm game, baby, but I already know what the prize is," she said.
"You don't," he scoffed.
Only the left corner of Leandra’s lips curled into a knowing grin. She quickly scribbled something down on a piece of paper, punched in the code to open her small digital safe, sealed the paper in a small envelope, then placed it in and locked the door.
"We'll just open that after you get your prize," she nonchalantly replied.
***************************************************
CURSE AND RUN A LAP.
Leandra bounced wildly on top of Darius.
His pussy-soaked cock itched for release, but he held onto her hips to control both her drastic wriggling and his eager penetration.
After hours on a weekend, they had snuck inside the gated high school track.
Stripped down to only running shoes, they strained to maintain orgasmic control on the large beach towel they laid down for comfort.
Leandra switched from bouncing to slow grinding, maddeningly and hypnotizingly rotating her pelvis.
She got up and knelt between his legs, ready to give him head.
However, he wasn’t prepared for her icy, evening-cooled hands as she gripped his length.
"Oh, shit!" he bellowed, immediately regretting his mistake.
A promise was a promise, so he took off, hotfooting it around the track while holding onto his junk so it didn’t wobble around too painfully.
Halfway around the track, Darius could hear Leandra’s unrestrained laughter choke out in ragged bursts.
As he completed his circuit, he trotted to their towel and panted, "You're gonna pay for that, my dear."
"Then make me pay," Leandra retorted.
Leandra flattened her breasts against the soft cotton fabric, raising her ass up and spreading her kneeling legs ever so slightly. Pointy blades of grass stabbed against the towel, scratching her nipples deliciously through the fluffy weave of fibers.
Darius knelt then worked himself slowly inside her, delighted with the sloshing sound her cunt made as she Kegel-gripped his veiny pole.
He leaned forward while fucking her pussy, reaching underneath her hips to tickle her clit in time with his pounding.
Leandra began to sing a half-conscious, throaty babble, smiling and grunting, moaning and humming.
Her climaxes spilled out, along with a barked and involuntary, "Fuck."
"Tag. You're it," Darius proclaimed and swatted her ass.
In one almost elegant motion, Leandra smoothly rocked back on her heels from the dog pose and sprinted like a 400-meter hurdler, taking long even strides with her head held high. She’d seem almost stately, if she wasn’t cupping her breasts with her hands for support while she rounded the course.
Darius didn’t chortle half as enthusiastically at Leandra's misfortune as she did at his, but his smug, laughter-filled mug slightly annoyed her anyway as she came around the bend. Her eager, breathless kisses quickly melted that expression off his face.
The exertion from running meshed with the excitement of the dare and they tumbled to the ground in a sideways sixty-nine, licking and lapping each other off to an almost simultaneous and surprising release.
"Goddamn," Leandra cooed.
"Motherfuck," Darius moaned.
They both arched their eyebrows at each other, got up in tandem, and jogged around the track, holding hands.
***************************************************
MIDDAY MOUNTAIN FUCK
In the off-season, lost on purpose in the middle of a lesser-known national park, Leandra and Darius fucked in one of the designated picnic areas, semi-protected from scrapes and nicks by a cheap supermarket tablecloth spread out on the ground.
As they cuddled facing each other, the altitude made them lightheaded. Leandra squatted in the hollow between her boyfriend's knee-bent thighs and tensed abdomen. She knelt to take the pressure off her legs, pressing and holding his dick just so, refusing to let go until loosening a rolling avalanche of orgasms from quim to tummy to tits and back again.
Darius flopped on his back, eyes closed, drinking in the wonderful swirling weight of Leandra’s moist gash enveloping his cock.
Leandra threw her head back and leaned her palms on her boyfriend’s shins, inhaling the lovely, sunbaked pine aroma of Mother Nature's intoxicating noon.
The wet, ticklish nibbling between the toes of her left foot made her giddy.
"You do that, you fucking freak," Leandra purred delightedly.
The low and chirping barks made her snicker.
"Tryin' somethin' new, are ya?" she teased.
"What?" Darius said drowsily, bleary eyes now half open.
As the angry growls increased in intensity and volume, Leandra tilted her head forward, her eyes now focused on the troop of angry squirrels hissing their displeasure around her feet.
Leandra tumbled backwards off of Darius, scrambling to safety on top of a picnic table.
Darius quickly twisted himself upright, crouching and waving his arms at the angry rodents. They did not back down and approached stealthily like a gang of meerkats hassling a cobra.
He grabbed the tablecloth and waved it like a matador at the furry horde.
"Back! Back!" he bellowed at them.
They temporarily scattered, momentarily confused, then regrouped for mass harassment.
"Fuck this," Leandra said, and hopped off the table to gather her things.
Darius followed suit, gathering clothes, car keys, and the tablecloth.
They both sprinted to their rented Jetta and Leandra peeled out, leaving a triumphant platoon of hairy tormentors chattering in the distance.
After an unsettling ten minutes of panicked driving, Leandra gradually came back to earth from her adrenaline high.
"What the hell was that?" Darius managed to croak out between fits of nervous laughter.
"Chipmunks ain't like that in the city," Leandra gasped.
Managing to regain his shaken sense of humor, Darius said, "Headline: 'Horny Couple Mauled to Death by Furious Hill Rats'."
Not to be outdone, Leandra volunteered, "How about 'Randy Alpine Tourists Smothered by Angry Beavers'?"
"You win, you win," Darius conceded, picking nettles out of Leandra's hair.
***************************************************
THE REDOLENT ROMANCE OF REFUSE
"I'm going to find a random website, then I'll scroll slowly down the page," said Leandra.
"Uh huh," said Darius.
"You'll keep your eyes closed, then place your finger randomly on the screen."
"Okay."
"Whatever you point to, we'll have to involve that word somehow in our lovemaking."
Leandra closed her eyes and typed random keystrokes. She landed on a page and invited Darius over. He closed his eyes. As she slowly scrolled down, Darius placed his index finger on her monitor.
"Uh oh," Leandra moaned.
When Darius opened his eyes, he saw the word his finger was pressed against.
Dumpster
"Oh boy," Darius complained.
They scoped out the cleanest place they could find in their neighborhood. The bin they found in a discrete alley didn't seem to be infested with vermin and was relatively empty.
They came back later that evening when there was no foot traffic.
"I'm not getting in," Darius warned.
"Neither am I!" Leandra concurred.
Armed with condoms, surgical gloves, and lube, they assumed they'd have a quick knee-trembler against the wall next to the trash receptacle. But the walls themselves were streaked with some stinky mystery moisture that made that possibility impossible.
They placed newly bought trash bags on the ground so they wouldn’t get smudged. Darius yanked his pants and underwear down. Leandra worked him to hardness with her gloved fingers and a squirt of KY.
Darius got on his back next to the dumpster. Leandra hiked up her skirt and rubbed her pussy furiously and desperately. She squirted some of the KY on her pussy for moisture the situation was not at all producing.
She got out a condom and tried to roll it on his cock, only at half-mast.
"Come on, baby, you gotta help me out," Leandra begged.
"I'm trying. Trust me," Darius whined.
What neither one of them mentioned, but excruciatingly endured nonetheless, was the rotten oranges and days-old fish stench all dumpsters emit, no matter how empty or full they are.
Almost at the point of gagging, Leandra unfastened her skirt and placed it over Darius' mouth. Darius took off his jersey and pressed it over Leandra's lips and nose.
Even with all that preparation, they still failed to bring masks. However, this impromptu workaround sparked off a weird quirk neither one of them knew they had. Looking at her skirt covering half of Darius' face made Leandra instantly wet. Seeing his top smashed against his girlfriend's mouth got Darius immediately hard.
The familiar warmth of each other's scent temporarily overwhelmed the dumpster funk.
They managed to tie their homemade masks around their heads, and as the condom was now filled out with her boyfriend’s fully erect prick, Leandra squeezed him inside her slit and bounced up and down hurriedly.
They were interrupted mid-pump by a restaurant worker coming through the back door of his establishment. He turned on a hose and started washing out a plastic pail he brought with him.
He turned his head toward the compromised couple and was confronted by the disquieting sight laid out before his sex-shocked eyes.
The half-finished cigar he'd been smoking dropped from his lips.
"What in the ever-loving fuck?" is all he could manage to grumble.
"It's not what you think," Darius said.
"This is well past my mental acuities," the restauranteur growled. "You kinksters can take your show to Danni's Dungeon just down the street."
"Sir, that's not what this is," Leandra offered.
"Be that as it may," he warned, "you Zoomers with your ice bucket challenges and such need to pack up your skivvies and skee-daddle."
Leandra corrected, "My boyfriend's a Zoomer, but I'm actually a Millennial, mister."
"Get the fuck outta here or I’ll turn my hose on ya!" the restauranteur threatened.
"We're going, we're going," Darius said as both he and Leandra got to their feet, gathered their goods, and rushed out of the alley, their bare butts wiggling a hasty goodbye to the restauranteur.
"What a grump," Leandra whispered to Darius.
"Fuckin' nerds," the restauranteur cursed to himself out of their earshot.
***************************************************
Weeks after Darius had sent in the contest stories (attributing their adventures to differently-named characters and using a nom de plume for himself), he received the prize he'd been waiting for.
"You know we could have just made stuff up instead of actually doing the things we did," Leandra said.
"Yeah, we coulda," Darius admitted, suddenly realizing that fact as well.
"Well, we had fun, didn't we?" Leandra piped up.
"Kinda? Sorta?" Darius said with hesitation.
"Let's not travel a Mobius strip of regret, baby," Leandra offered. "Besides, we'll have great stories to share later."
Darius ripped open the package to reveal …
one … simple … large … white … men's … cotton … crew neck.
"Really?" Darius asked disappointedly.
"Nailed it!" Leandra chirped happily.
"Yeah, I'm sorry, honey, you're gonna have to prove that," Darius challenged.
She went to her digital safe, opened it, and handed Darius the envelope.
He ripped it open, confirming her hyphenated one-word answer did indeed match his prize.
"How did you know?" Darius asked, honestly impressed.
"I solved the puzzle that hinted what the prize would be," Leandra said.
"If you knew the answer, why didn't you just send that in instead of us doing what we did?" Darius asked, somewhat exasperated.
"Because, silly," Leandra leaned in to hold his hand and nuzzle his cheek, "what we did to make those stories was my prize."
Darius really couldn't argue that point.
"Okay," Darius sheepishly grinned. "But, still, how did you figure it out so fast?"
"I don't know," Leandra said. "I've always been really good with brain teasers."
"Show me," he challenged.
Leandra wrote down the words of the challenge again.
Lana "lost" a giggle wood.
"This is an anagram," Leandra said. "Every character can be rearranged to make another phrase."
She wrote out the solution.
Google "and all I got was".
"I still don't get it," Darius complained.
"Do what it says," she volunteered, smiling at him.
He went to the laptop and typed the phrase in the search engine.
"I'll be damned," Darius exhaled, newly and proudly amazed by his girlfriend.
