"Stop it."

"Stop what, I'm not doing anything."

"Yes you are. You're doing that clenching, curling, clinging thing you do when you're displeased. So, please, stop doing it."

"Hurumph."

"And sulking isn't going to help. We're going to be here awhile so why don't you try and enjoy yourself,"

"Un-fucking-likely. What do you mean 'awhile'? Isn't this going to be like all the other times; excruciating, embarrassing, and requiring a rapid and flustered exit after you've made up some excuse that nobody with half a brain cell would believe?"

"No."

"Really? Are you out of your tiny, little, mind? He's an arsewipe."

"I'm sure he's lovely. He's just a bit nervous. Trying to make a good impression."

"He instructed you on the best way to drink water from a glass, for fuck's sake. Where did you find this one?"

"Tinder."

"Swipe left, swipe right, Tinder? So how many profiles did you view before you settled on this fuckwit? Two?"

"Hundreds."

"Hundreds! And this was the best you could come up with? Look, I know you're desperate; and to be honest I wouldn't mind feeling a nice, hard, cock sliding eagerly between my clinging lips; but surely neither of us are that desperate."

"Stop being such a sour puss. giggles That's you, isn't it. Sour pussy puss. Anyway, it's my date and I think he's rather handsome, not to mention that he is rather ripped. Yums."

"About that; when did spray on shirts and jeans become a thing? And what's with the unbuttoned look? Has he got palsy or arthritis or did his mum never teach him how to do up buttons; or shoelaces now I think about it? Oh God, you're doing that hair twirling, flushing thing now. Fuck."

"Isn't he dishy. Look at those muscles. I just want to run my hands across them, feel them twitch beneath my touch. Do you think he waxes? I do adore a man with a smooth chest. So, so, mmmmm. And look at his nipple. Poking through his stretched shirt. Quite provocative. I could just pop that in my mouth and lap and suck and nibble and tease as his bulging arms encircle my trembling flesh. Bet he works out. Just a bit, not too much. A big of cardio and some weights. He's got such a chiselled definition. Quite, quite scrummy."

"Can you slow down on the wine. You're barely giving him time to top up your glass."

"Did you notice his schlong? giggles Oh, it's definitely a schlong. Looks like some quality sausage meat he's got trapped inside those trousers. Almost like he's stuffed a rolling pin down there. Now I wouldn't mind a little bit of 'Ready, Steady, Cook' with that monster."

"Notice it! How could I not notice it? It's eyeing me up under the table. Fucking scary is what that is and I need to tell you that puckered star and I have had a bit of a chat and we're not letting it anywhere near us. If you want to play with the trouser snake then it's gobble-gobble-slurpy-suck-suck only. Got it?"

"We'll see."

Some time later.

"Happy now?"

"Oh, fuck yeah. That's much, much better."

"So what did you think of my, what did you call it, gobble-gobble-slurpy-suck-suck?"

"You were hot. I couldn't believe it when you unzipped him; it was like uncoiling a hose. I thought it was never gonna end and your hands looked so tiny griping his shaft. I was like, wow. I might even have done a little sprinkle in my panties just at the sight of him."

"Might you?"

"Um, maybe. And then before I knew it you were on your knees like some cheap supplicant whore."

"I probably should spend more time on my knees. I quite like it, brings out my inner desire to serve and service. Besides, I do prefer my men upright and towering above me, rather than horizontal and staring unseeingly up at the ceiling whilst your fringe caresses his thighs as you bob endlessly up and down. Much nicer looking up at him with beseeching eyes as his hand grips at your hair; guiding you, leading you, dragging you on and off his smooth, swollen helmet. Your lips stretched, tongue pressed into the vase of your mouth, dribble flecked on your lips, drool trickling down your chin. Much nicer."

"Mmmmmmm."

"Such a shame that you were so adamant that you didn't want any. Especially after I'd made such an effort to get him all spit and saliva lubricated for you; even if I did choke and gag on all that throbbing manliness a couple of times. I'm sure he'd have been quite willing to give you the fucking you deserve."

"Well, you know, first date and all. Need to maintain a little mystery. Can't give it all up at the first time of asking. Though next time if he wants a taste of honey I might be amenable to him licking the inside of my pot clean."

"Would you now? Dirty bitch. And I bet you wouldn't mind feeling his cum-swollen balls slapping against those arse cheeks as he drills your weeping wound."

"You might think that, I couldn't possibly comment. Besides, today wasn't about me, it was about you."

smiles

"And I'll tell you what, you looked fucking delicious when he'd finished with you. Flushed, flustered, eyelashes fluttering uncontrollably, his cum splattered across your burning skin like princess sparkles as you gasped for breath. Utterly divine. Scrummy, yummy and delicious."

"Oh thank you sweetie, that's so nice of you to say. And there was I thinking you didn't approve."

"No problem. Ummmm."

"What sweetie?"

"Ummmm. I don't suppose there's any chance of a little finger massage before sleep time, is there? It's just that, we'll after all that excitement, I'm just a teensy bit, ummmm, slippery and, well maybe just a bit throbby too. Just to help me settle."

"Sure. My pleasure. I thought you'd never ask."