Not another MTV reality show!
There is an old western movie with Roy Rogers in it. When he kisses his horse Trigger my heart goes all a flutter.
There are three women in small two piece bathing suits with a small bush in a pot in front of each one. They each have a pair of hedge clippers and are trimming their bushes, the last one in the shape of a heart. I'm usually laughing so hard I don't remember the female product they are advertising, but I keep thinking "Can they show that on TV?"
If I got a million dollars, I would quit my job, buy a printing press and make my second million.
I never lie about my height. That would be foolish. Now if you will excuse me I have to go over to the carpenter shop and pick up my stilts.
Hey I use to be a sailor. A girl in every port is true.
Hey I use to be a sailor. A girl in every port is true.
Where to start? Will need a whole flock of bean eating birds. Let's see, I agree with any reality show jerk and those fake game shows like Survivor ,etc., Trump, the Obama's, the Clintons, the Bush's, any American who thinks being a Nazi or commie (actually a Nazi, Communist, Socialist, Royalist are all they same just look at how they all believe only in a few ruling the majority and being above the laws) is a good thing because they know nothing about history. The whole U. S. news media. (I watch Japan, or Europe to find out what is happening in the world), Bruce the Drag Queen and his big butted clan, maybe just a little on our forefathers because they were fool enough to believe politicians would be honest and not want to hold office for life and be treated like royalty (they should of known better) all the computer nerds who work at Apple, etc. because they are not as smart as some brain washed terrorists or 12 year old who can hack into any system they design. Sorry had to take a breath. Over paid actors and athletes who are just court jesters who are there to entertain us not us worship or entertain them. Ticks and mosquitoes (what was that fool Noah doing allowing them on the boat?) Fake tits, because every time I jump on a girl with fake tits I end up bouncing off her and onto the ceiling. Girls who wear shin guards when I take them dancing. Congress because they destroyed our freedom to have free TV, light blubs that are cheap and work for long time, want to put Big Brother chips in our cars so they can keep track of us, and that they want us to get stuck with Obama Care when they won't because they know it doesn't work, etc. They should get paid min. wage and only when they are in Washington working, not away getting bribes, etc. Did I mention mosquitoes? The day time talking heads who are nothing but a bunch of cackling hens, and the people who go to their shows only because they are hoping to get free shinny things. Cross walk lights that don't give you time to get across the street. My magic wallet. Every time I put money in it the money seems to disappear. College teachers who think they are God and who charge outrages prices for their books, etc. and then leave you stuck with them without ever opening them in class and any college who charges more for a dorm room than the Ritz for a pent house. My doctor because he has cold hands. (going to buy him a pair of gloves for Christmas). The washing machine that eats my socks so I don't own a matching pair. I've got a lot more but it is time for my electric shock treatment.
A woman's body is a beautiful gift, I hate to see so covered in tat's that you can't even tell what kind of picture or words they are and it makes a woman look like an old time sailor. People get carried away with tats that soon they are just one dark blob. I especially don't like them on a woman's breast. A small tattoo here or there is sexy, but making your body look like a freeway underpass that been sprayed by a bunch of illiterate taggers is a turn off. Besides it is a fad and in a few years you will have to go thru a lot of pain to remove them.
To be a rich mindless corrupt politician like Obama or Clinton and not have to earn any money on my own, but live off bribes and kick backs and not pay taxes and obey only those laws I want to. As a royal I will give myself a title and treat everyone around me like the stupid people they are. "Off with their heads." to anyone who questions my lack of class. Or maybe like the guy who runs Iran, I will call myself God and live on a mountain up high and order all the fools to blow themselves up for my entertainment. But I would probably get bored. So I'll just have a nice cabin in the woods and go fishing.
I am a true believer in equal rights, therefore I must go on the record and state to all that I enjoy both very much. I am also a gentleman, therefore the lady should always cum first.
What can a deformed Kardashian Behind be useful for?
As you know the Kardashians are a bunch of overpaid no talent women whose only claim to fame is that their father was a sleaze bag lawyer that got a cold blooded murder off and left two families destroyed and that their step father is a drag queen pervert. However the poor girls do suffer from a rare disease called “Fat Ass”. Please help these poor worthless deformed women by finding ways for them to use their ugly ass for good and not evil.
HERE ARE SOME SUGGESTIONS. PLEASE FEEL FREE TO ADD YOUR OWN.
1. Hire a mountain guide to take you to the top of their butt so you can plant your flag.
2. As a replacement for the Goodyear Blimp when it retires and fly over the Super Bowl.
3. As a balloon float in the Thanksgiving Parade.
4. To fill a large Florida sink hole.
5. As a child’s bouncing ride at a party.
6. To fill a Black Hole in space.
7. A place for homeless mountain goats to roam.
8. To plug an active volcano. (If it does explode the lava will have a place to go. It will give the women a change to say they really have a hot ass.)
9. Their fake husbands can use their ass as a ball in friendly game of basketball.
10. Someplace for the Drag Queen Bruce Jenner to hide his head in shame.
Bonus question: I don’t know anyone who is foolish enough to admit they waste their time watching a show without a plot, with rotten actors and direction that is oblivious fake and treats its views as if they are even dumber than the people on the show, but if there is anyone out there willing to put on a mask, hide their voice that does really care about the kardashians will you tell us why. It would be most entertaining to find out what it is that makes you waste your life this way. I mean if you are the type who likes to watch paint dry we can understand otherwise please be kind and give us a good laugh.
I think women in uniform are very sexy. My first was what they now call Female Sailors or use to call WAVES. It was hot undressing her. And I was in the hospital and there were some really hot sexy nurses (but they don't dress up like you see in the pictures), but I had two of them make passes at me, kiss me and let me touch their breast and I have made love to one, unbutton her uniform down the front, exposing her sexy lace white bra and panties. Ummm. And who doesn't love the "French Maid" sex toy. I have had fun with maids, not dressed like that of course, but still, a woman is like a gift to a man and part of the enjoyment of a gift is in the wrapping and removing it. Maybe it is the fact a uniform gives a women some degree of authority and its wanting to show you can slowly seduce that authority away from her and make her your pet.
It is roll playing. When two people are together they should not be afraid to live out their desires no matter how kinky. No one gets hurt and it isn't for real, but if it increases the sex and love making why not. Maybe she can be "Mommy" at times. How many times have you hear someone say "Come to Daddy."? Or "Oh mom ma!"?
Love watching a girl pleasing herself, her face twisting in erotic pleasure, her body squirming, her moans. Of course it makes me hard and I enjoy jacking off on her as she cums. Or saving my hard on for a second cum is she desires.