Quote by spriteQuote by chefkathleenQuote by bigguns
Lush is based in cali (as in the data center that houses the lush servers that recently crashed is in cali)
No it's not.
*nods* it's in my garage
You don't have a garage. You live in my garage.
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rudyP34
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 42
0 miles · Quebec City
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Quote by Dancing_Doll
Women want guys that are basically "nice" and "sweet" but there are other criteria on their list too (and I'm not talking about physical attractiveness).
but...
should we automatically assume that a guy that is told that he is the "sweetest, nicest guy ever" automatically translates into being "perfect"? Women look for a lot of different things when it comes to being a compatible personality for them. It doesn't meant that guys are either nice/sweet OR total assholes. Think about the gray zone in between. Maybe there's just a mismatch and she's trying to give you a compliment. It doesn't necessary mean that it's about looks.
A nice/sweet guy with a great body doesn't really translate into the perfect man for a lot of women (including me). There's more to it than that. But when we see the incompatibility, we tend to default to complimenting a guy's positive traits before backing off. It doesn't mean the only reason we don't want to date him is because he isn't hot enough.
Compatibility goes far beyond being generally sweet and nice. A complete asshole might turn into the sweetest guy ever in the presence of someone he truly cares for. So, finding a good match is tricky. It's trials and errors. One day you fail miserably and blame the entire universe for your misfortune, another day you hit the jackpot. The only important thing is not to give up and stay true to yourself, and enjoy yourself. A rejection should be seen as a good thing, although it's really hard on the spot. It's a process of elimination. One woman rejects you, move on to the next. One down, 3 billions to go!
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Quote by overmykneenow
I find the best stories (for me anyway) rely very little on physical descriptions of the main characters male or female.
Thanks to porn most of the descriptive narrative of a lot of sex writing is sadly limited to sight and sound: painfully lacking in the sensations of touch, smell, taste and emotion.
I agree with this. I want to shoot myself when someone pauses his/her story to insert a description. The "let me start by saying that I'm 5'7" with a great body, bla bla bla"... totally kills it for me. I don't mind someone mentioning a body part in action, but otherwise physical descriptions are not necessary.
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Quote by nicolaQuote by rudyP34
I'd agree, if it weren't for the fact that some people take it seriously, when your comment is even only slightly negative. Either you care or you don't. If you care, the voting process should represent more. If you don't care, then why have a voting system at all? I don't see how literary integrity and social networking can't coexist. Give more credibility to the stories, give more credibility to the members, and this site reaches a whole new level. Of course, that's probably not in anyone's plan. All that matters is getting hits, not delivering a good reading product.
We take the whole voting / commenting / quality standards on here very seriously. It has been discussed to death, as to how best to set it up.
Every story is read by an experienced moderator before hitting the site. Stories which would warrant a 1, have practically disappeared. We toss dozens of stories back to authors on a daily basis, suggesting improvements.
"Give more credibility to the stories, give more credibility to the members" - I don't get what you mean. How would you go about it, force people to comment on every vote they give? Each story would end up with a couple of votes.
If you have some constructive comments to make, I'd be delighted to read them and take them on board.
I'm sorry about my comments, I realize it didn't take into account the hard work of the few on here that make the site work for a lot of people. I'm fully aware of what it takes to run a site like this, especially with the volume of stories being submitted and published every day. I understand that my opinion on the voting system was rather insensitive and rude.
Let me just say this, then: the ratings are merely an ego boost. They don't represent a whole lot. There are stories with good scores that are clearly worse than some of the gems that can be found on here. I would eliminate the votes and comments, and just leave a box that says "Leave a comment to the author". A private message, in essence. Not something left to the public eye. Something private. You want constructive criticism? There. People would probably be more open to discuss a story's weaknesses if they didn't read all the other comments saying "Amazing story! Super hawt! I'm so hard right now! More more more!". These pointless comments are the standard, and people rarely deviate from that. It's sad, but even on the internet people are victims to peer pressure.
I don't mean to be negative and arrogant. I came off as such, because... well, I don't know... maybe I am arrogant at times, not that I should be. I re-read my stories the other day, and they shouldn't even be published. So, maybe I'm more humble right now. But really, I didn't mean to berate the work you guys put in this site. I hope you can see the constructive side to what I'm trying to say. If not, then blame english as a second language for the gaps in communication. ;)
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Being in a similar situation, I can give you the advice a good friend gave me: "What do you have to lose, except a little money? Go for it!" And since I'm already careless with my money, it's not even an issue. The only issue is that this amazing, sweet, smart, funny and crazy person is out there, and I'd be an idiot not to give it my best shot.
Like you, I'm quite picky, and luckily I've found the girl I had stopped believing existed in this world. I mean, she's all I've ever wished for, and then some, and I was in the process of settling for less, eventually. But I found her, and I must do everything I can to make it happen. So, if you two are crazy for each other, you'll find a way to make it happen.
Enjoy the ride!
Like you, I'm quite picky, and luckily I've found the girl I had stopped believing existed in this world. I mean, she's all I've ever wished for, and then some, and I was in the process of settling for less, eventually. But I found her, and I must do everything I can to make it happen. So, if you two are crazy for each other, you'll find a way to make it happen.
Enjoy the ride!
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Quote by CurlygirlyQuote by YourSlutBella
Yes, I also enjoy the "
I'm going to get scolded for posting again, aren't I? I promised myself that I would NOT post on anymore forum threads that didn't make sense, yet here I am. *sigh*
There was actually something in this thread, but Bella quickly chose to delete it. Although, there's really no shame in making a thread saying how great I am, Bella. Don't worry. Most people already know it.
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I don't know how liars can keep up with all the lies. I'm just far too lazy to lie, keep track of what I told to whoever... I either tell the truth or shut my mouth. I never lie. Even if it's embarassing. I can deal with embarassment easily enough. I just find an excuse. It's much better than having to find justifications as to why you lied.
And guys... try it. If you tell people you absolutely NEVER lie and will answer any question they have, they're usually stomped and end up not being able to think of a single question. So, in the end, I don't even have to lie, because my most embarassing truths aren't even questioned on.
And guys... try it. If you tell people you absolutely NEVER lie and will answer any question they have, they're usually stomped and end up not being able to think of a single question. So, in the end, I don't even have to lie, because my most embarassing truths aren't even questioned on.
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Quote by LeFabuleuxDestinQuote by rudyP34
Why am I not allowed to improve my german while you improve your french? German grammar may be a bitch, but I'm kinda smart, you know. Just admit it, you want to save german for when you're speaking behind my back, right? It won't work. I won't allow it!
If I want to talk bad about you behind your back, me and my friends can still resort to Latin and/or German slang.
I know you're a genius - you don't have to try to prove that by talking to me in 3 languages. In fact, that would be sort of confusing.
I don't necessarily want to talk to you in 3 languages. I want to understand you in your native language, that's all. I know most, if not all, of your relatives speak the other languages I speak, but I consider it simple courtesy to be able to communicate in german. Especially when you take me on a tour of germany. I will need it. I realized when I was in Switzerland that my german sucks. But, of course, back then, I had no idea they actually spoke portuguese, so...
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Quote by Guest
no I don't think so, most are infacuated with some one who speaks nice to them. they don't realize in the long run a relation on lush is like real life the longer you with some one the staler it becomes
If all your relationships get stale, it's because you probably don't love the person enough to make the EFFORTS to keep it fresh. If I was with someone and didn't feel like trying to make her happy, I hope she would dump me brutally.
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Time - Pink Floyd
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
Fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain
And you are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun
And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death
Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over, thought I'd something more to say
Home, home again
I like to be here when I can
And when I come home cold and tired
It’s good to warm my bones beside the fire
Far away across the field
The tolling of the iron bell
Calls the faithful to their knees
To hear the softly spoken magic spells.
Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
Fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain
And you are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun
And you run and you run to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death
Every year is getting shorter, never seem to find the time
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over, thought I'd something more to say
Home, home again
I like to be here when I can
And when I come home cold and tired
It’s good to warm my bones beside the fire
Far away across the field
The tolling of the iron bell
Calls the faithful to their knees
To hear the softly spoken magic spells.
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Quote by LeFabuleuxDestinQuote by rudyP34
I want to work on my german and italian. German to talk to a pretty girl, and italian to communicate better with my second family!
You're such a kid. Let the pretty girl (you knew I'd read this... blushes) improve her French and you won't have to learn German?
Seriously, German grammar is a bitch and you know I'll make fun of you for very mistake you're going to make
I'd love to teach anyone except for rudyP34 though... should be fun.
Why am I not allowed to improve my german while you improve your french? German grammar may be a bitch, but I'm kinda smart, you know. Just admit it, you want to save german for when you're speaking behind my back, right? It won't work. I won't allow it!
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How I would love to finally learn english!
Seriously, I speak French and English almost flawlessly, then some italian, spanish and german. I want to work on my german and italian. German to talk to a pretty girl, and italian to communicate better with my second family!
And russian, because of my spy mission in Moscow to retrieve sensitive documents that were stolen from my bedroom.
Seriously, I speak French and English almost flawlessly, then some italian, spanish and german. I want to work on my german and italian. German to talk to a pretty girl, and italian to communicate better with my second family!
And russian, because of my spy mission in Moscow to retrieve sensitive documents that were stolen from my bedroom.
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Quote by LisaQuote by rudyP34
Sooooooorryyy!
There's some truth to it, though. Okay, I don't want to sound pessimistic, so here's real advice: be yourself and write stories you enjoy. And stick to it. With time, things will pick up. People will read one, then onto another, and so forth. Just give it time and keep to it.
I looked at your profile and noticed you don't vote or comment on other people's work. Not trying to sound harsh, but it's hard to expect something from others that you're not doing yourself. It really does help if you put yourself out there, get to know people and start talking about writing, either here in the forum or via the comments on stories themselves.
You could even find people who have the electorate and commentators badges on their profiles and read their work. They're more likely to return the favour.
Commentator
Electorate
I actually talk to a few people in private. What you don't see is the people I've collaborated with, some of which are no longer members here (although I have no idea why they left), and done so outside of the site itself. I don't feel the need to comment on a story on here when I've actually commented on the same story one on one. Maybe it makes me look like I don't want to get involved with the site, but it's not true. I get involved with people I care about, and that I've come to know, thanks to this site.
I'm not really as bitter for not getting many views, votes and comments as you probably think. And to those who wish to get more views, votes and comments, I'd say just don't try too hard. "Be yourself" was, is and will always be the best advice in any situation.
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Quote by nicola
Rudy - your record needs changing.
Good point Clum.
Excellent advice Lisa and Dancing_Doll
Sooooooorryyy!
There's some truth to it, though. Okay, I don't want to sound pessimistic, so here's real advice: be yourself and write stories you enjoy. And stick to it. With time, things will pick up. People will read one, then onto another, and so forth. Just give it time and keep to it.
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This site is very clique-ish, they way I see it. So yeah, have lots of friends who will read it. If you're a hot girl, you'll get plenty more views with suck-ups praising your story. If you're an old fat ugly dude (I guess I am one....
), don't expect much and blame others, not yourself. That's the way I manage to cope.
), don't expect much and blame others, not yourself. That's the way I manage to cope. Active Ink Slinger
Quote by delishdani
I honestly have rather small boobs.. (34B).. I am kind of self aware of them, and do get embarresed.. Should I? I have given the thought of breast implants..Nothing huge..A nice C.. What do you think?
Whatever size you are is probably perfect. You shouldn't spend thousands of dollars on fake breasts. Spend it on a trip or something. Go to Peru, or Thailand, or New Zealand, or Norway, or South Africa... or Canada! Have an experience that will last a lifetime. That's something real. Fake breasts... well.. they're fake.
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Quote by clum
I am going to be so bold as to suggest that one problem in your relationship is that, instead of speaking to him about your issues, you are asking strangers on an erotic story website.
This.
The internet is so not the first place to turn to for relationship advice. If I feel weird, sure, I'll google the symptoms. That's pretty straight-forward. But here, we're talking about not one, but two very complex sets of data. We're talking about what's going on between to human beings with each their motivations, and seemingly very little communication between them.
If you can't find the courage to talk to him directly, maybe you should discuss it with someone really close to you, instead of strangers on a message board. I had a friend (girl) who was having a rough time with her boyfriend, and she kept asking me for advice, because, let's face it, I'm awesome. My one advice was this: "Go discuss it with your sister. She's totally biased towards you. She wants nothing but your happiness." So, here, I give it to you too: go discuss it with someone close to you, a sister, mother, best friend. Someone completely biased towards you, who wants nothing but your happiness. Gather some confidence, and then confront the boyfriend and communicate.
You never really know unless you ask. And I don't if it's just me noticing it, but some girls tend to expect their boyfriends to guess what they want. Now, I'm pretty sure everyone has noticed, but men aren't very good at guessing a woman's mind. Help us. Tell us what's wrong.
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Quote by DirtyMartiniQuote by spriteQuote by rudyP34
Maybe it should be mandatory to write a message when requesting friendship. You click "Ask to become a friend", you're taken to the message writing screen, you write a little something that explains why and then you send the request. I'm sure most of the people hate random friend requests. Not me... I was requested once in 10 months, and I promptly accepted. Wait.. twice!
The way things work right now, either you just empty-request someone, or you have to send a private message separately, and in some cases, I assume some people get a lot of messages and requests, and at some point, the two become dissociated. By combining requesting and messaging, it makes it easier for people to sort out those who just add people randomly, or because they have a hot avatar.
good idea
Oh yeah...I think this is great as well...I can include one of my classy and original lines along with my friend requests...
Something like..."Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here."
Or..."I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your BedRock."
Yeah, I think this is a great idea...
Man, that's a great idea... I never imagined it this way, but yeah... Click "Ask to be a friend", then "Insert your pick-up line", then Send!
And dude, sorry, but I won't sleep with you. Sprite has an outside chance, but it's still a long shot.
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Quote by CurlygirlyQuote by rudyP34
I think it is possible to get to know someone very well, develop a friendship and then expand it into love. Sure, if it starts with lust, I doubt it develops much further than that. It's like learning to fly a plane without learning how to land it. If you try to build a relationship on that, you better hope you'll be able to glide indefinitely. But if two people start with the basics, with their character, their personality, their values, their hopes and dreams.. just like any solid relationship, I guess. But if you're here to cyber in the first place, and you start with "Do you like big cocks?", then no, I don't suppose you'll find love here.
While I do think A LOT of people on Lush confuse lust and love, I absolutely know it is possible to find love here. It has happened and continues to happen all the time. As many other people have said, why not here? It's just like meeting people anywhere else and most people are more open and honest here than they normally are in the real world, which is certainly the case with me as far as expressing my wants and desires. I also think that when a real relationship between Lushies develops, it is not something that only takes place on Lush. In most cases, it then progresses to the phone and/or meeting. It seems that some people are under the impression that the "love" only exists on Lush chats or something, which is not the case at all.
You're absolutely right. It's like meeting someone at the grocery store. The relationship doesn't have to take place just in the grocery store. It follows you outside and back home. Otherwise... seriously, a relationship that wouldn't leave the grocery store would put the "gross" into "grocery"...
And I have, myself, taken it to another level, i.e. the phone. I must say it's fantastic.
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Quote by spriteQuote by rudyP34
Maybe it should be mandatory to write a message when requesting friendship. You click "Ask to become a friend", you're taken to the message writing screen, you write a little something that explains why and then you send the request. I'm sure most of the people hate random friend requests. Not me... I was requested once in 10 months, and I promptly accepted. Wait.. twice!
The way things work right now, either you just empty-request someone, or you have to send a private message separately, and in some cases, I assume some people get a lot of messages and requests, and at some point, the two become dissociated. By combining requesting and messaging, it makes it easier for people to sort out those who just add people randomly, or because they have a hot avatar.
good idea
I bet you're only saying that because you wanna sleep with me. I know my idea was moronic and senseless.. stop sucking up to me.
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Maybe it should be mandatory to write a message when requesting friendship. You click "Ask to become a friend", you're taken to the message writing screen, you write a little something that explains why and then you send the request. I'm sure most of the people hate random friend requests. Not me... I was requested once in 10 months, and I promptly accepted. Wait.. twice!
The way things work right now, either you just empty-request someone, or you have to send a private message separately, and in some cases, I assume some people get a lot of messages and requests, and at some point, the two become dissociated. By combining requesting and messaging, it makes it easier for people to sort out those who just add people randomly, or because they have a hot avatar.
The way things work right now, either you just empty-request someone, or you have to send a private message separately, and in some cases, I assume some people get a lot of messages and requests, and at some point, the two become dissociated. By combining requesting and messaging, it makes it easier for people to sort out those who just add people randomly, or because they have a hot avatar.
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Quote by sexyho51
Its impossible to salvage a relationship through sex. Eventually we will have nothing in common but sex. Romance is where a couple gets to know each other intimately and create the foundation for a solid relationship, where communication is next, and then sex. Lol, imagine sitting alone in a house all day in silence,, only to turn around and ask partner if youre down sex, two times a day. I doubt she'll stay long.
Sometimes even romance gets in the way of communication. Communication first and foremost. Romance can then become a mean of communication. Some couples burn up too fast because romance is their ONLY mean of communication. And sex... well, sure, it has to be A PART of a relationship. It can't be the meal, while the relationship and communication are side dishes.
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