About
I'm a happy submissive slut to Jake. I would have been insulted by anyone calling me either "submissive" or "slut" in a previous life... but when he does, there's butterflies in my stomach and my knees wobble, and I cherish those words as the highest compliment I can get. I wonder if I may call him the love of my life yet after only three and a half years, but he's showing every promise that he will be. He fulfills me in so many ways, and takes me across boundaries I never thought I would cross, that I thought were impossible to cross. He doesn't break them; but he works on bending them, inch by inch. He doesn't think in hours or days; he gives me the weeks and months that I need to process the thought of going across, without forcing me, just pushing me ever so gently: a mere ambiguous hint first, an explicit word later, a toe dip to follow, finally a plunge. And every time, that plunge doesn't feel like the ordeal I thought it would be at first, but instead feels like a victory, like a deepening of my love, my submission, and my arousal at the same time. That victorious feeling, when I have overcome my fears and taboos and was able to follow him where he wants to lead me, and feel the liberation of licentious love and unrestrained servitude to him, that is the simply the best thing in the world.
I have joined this site on his instruction. I have always liked to put my thoughts and experiences to paper, but I always considered my writings to be private. I try to be completely honest in them, and at first it seems hard to be honest when someone is actually reading them. We are taught that a toxic mix of shame, guilt, fear, social norms, it stands in the way of true honesty about our feelings. Men hide away their porn collections from their wives, women are supposed to pretend they are more interested in love than they are in sex. Everyone will pay lip service to the idea of honesty, but so few of us practice it; it is more of a chivalrous ideal than a practical living standard, and truly honest people are usually despised. I was no different; and it took me years to even be honest to myself in those writings.
Then, Jake demanded my honesty to him. He could have just claimed his dominant rights and just read my stuff; but being the gentleman that he is, he wanted my permission to do so. It took months before I even gave him some carefully self-censored material. It was his response that drew me across that line. He didn't judge me, he didn't scorn me, he didn't use it against me, even when he didn't particularly like what he read. He just used it to understand me better, to deepen our relationship, to navigate the complex waters of my desires and anxieties. It boosted my confidence and my self-esteem, finding I could openly talk to him about issues that I hadn't shared with a single soul in all my life. His comments allowed me to make discoveries about myself, observations that he made that I had never made myself. It made me grow as a person, and in the end I proudly presented him unconstrained with every few pages from my hand. I was no longer afraid to show myself to him, including all the flaws and ugliness that belongs to every person as well. It felt so good to be known. It made me feel completely naked for him, not in the physical sense, but in the mind.
Now he has told me to extend that. My nakedness should no longer be limited to him alone; he wants me to extend it to others as well. But I am permitted to start in an easy way. I must walk naked in all my honesty, but on this site alone. I will tell you what I do, what I feel, what I dream about and what terrifies me. But you won't find my name, my face, or my telephone number here. My identity will be protected. After all, I am still a citizen of this society and my honesty would hurt me if it extended too far. I do hope you understand that.
Apart from the writings that I'll be publishing, I cordially invite you to query me; after all, it will be a test of my honesty to answer any question you may have, and thus comply with Jake's wishes. I will do my best to respond in depth, though I fear that the sheer volume of communication in a place where horny men rule supreme may limit me somewhat. If this actually gets out of hand, I will group your questions and write a public story about a particular subject. Needless to say, when I must divide my time between responding to you, I will pick the queries that intrigue or interest me to invest time to in my responses. Clearly vulgar or banal ones will receive much less attention. Also please, don't be a jerk. Jake has allowed me to nominate people for blocking when they are just rude, disrespectful, idiots, or other kinds of pain in the ass. Please make sure you don't become one of them!
Jake has given me the right to disregard any question that threatens to unveil my identity. This line is vague of course, and I will decide that on a case-by-case basis. Just some examples for now: you can ask me what kind of house I live in, but not my address; you can ask me what kind of job I do but not what company I work for; you can ask for my age but not my birth date; you can ask me to describe myself but not to post a photograph. I think you get the drift.
Jake also has access to this account (in fact he does to all my internet accounts). He will monitor my communication, and judge whether I am honest, elaborate, and complete. You may like to know that he will administer punishments when I lie, or when he feels that I'm evasive or trivializing. He won't write on here though; you can rest assured that all texts here are only written by me, Lucy.
I may be submissive, but you cannot assume control over me or issue any kind of command or instruction. That's Jake's prerogative. He sometimes delegates this power to others, but you will have to talk to him about that, and it is very unlikely that some short message exchange will persuade him.
Oh and girls, if most of the text above seems to be focused on men, that's by no means true! I cordially invite you to query me as well. I may not be fully bi just yet, but Jake has encouraged me to explore my sexual feelings for women as well.
I usually need some time to gather my thoughts. Chat doesn't fit in with that very well, and I will not be using it (at least for now). Phone or video communication is right out, and you will not receive any pictures of me either.
I'm very excited about this, it will be a journey for me as I'm not really used to sharing my intimate thoughts with strangers... but I'm looking forweard to talk to each and every one of you!
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Now tell me, how do you know that every single word above isn't a complete and utter lie?
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