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A timeless question: How much...

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Wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Don't believe everything that you read.

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You'd need to collect the wood chucking data for a random sample of woodchucks over a period, then calculate the mean and standard deviation. The mean should be close to the answer for any given population of woodchucks. You could even draw multiple samples from the woodchucks of different populations and compare using some statistical test or other (my wife is the expert on this stuff) to see if there are regional variations.BhA6PA0DiCS0zcN6

Or you could just wing it and guess.Vr5rp4YXModqoCOL
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Quote by seeker4
You'd need to collect the wood chucking data for a random sample of woodchucks over a period, then calculate the mean and standard deviation. The mean should be close to the answer for any given population of woodchucks. You could even draw multiple samples from the woodchucks of different populations and compare using some statistical test or other (my wife is the expert on this stuff) to see if there are regional variations.ueAWnDmTFB69MJMb

Or you could just wing it and guess.NvRkx58nv5jYXZvn


Of course, wood chucking is only statistically significant when p is less than .05. However, we'll need to scrub the data for woodchuck outliers in order to ensure a greater degree of generalizability to the wood chucking population. It would also be important to hold the type of wood constant so that it doesn't introduce a confounding variable to the study. And we should probably get some validity and reliability data on the instrument that we'll use to measure chucks (chuckometer?) so that we can support the accuracy of our findings.

Don't believe everything that you read.

Active Ink Slinger
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First you ask the question, why is knowing relevant and necessary?
"A dirty book is rarely dusty"
Active Ink Slinger
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(in fake robot voice) 24
The Bee's Knees
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rrrreeeemmmmiiiixxxx!!!!

Say. Her. Name.


Her Royal Spriteness
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what kinda woodchuck? a Louisana short tail? a Wyoming ladderback? really, you need to provide pertinent information, dude.

You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.

Lurker
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Ohio woodchucks are the biggest and baddest and can chuck a shitload of wood. So the answer is a shitload.
Active Ink Slinger
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42?
Active Ink Slinger
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My standard answer - more than 6.
Active Ink Slinger
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Need one, bring two. Need three bring five.
Lurker
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Woodchucks and Chuck Wood are cute, but why would a woodchuck chuck wood, and would he chuck Chuck wood?

'Would a woodchuck chuck Chuck Wood as much as a woodchuck would chuck wood, if a woodchuck could chuck Chuck Wood?'


......

Unlike the normally unreliable misinformation of Wikipedia, their correct answer would be...

"A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood"
The Linebacker
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The woodchucks have unionized, and it now takes 5 woodchucks to chuck 1 piece of wood per hour. Anymore and they get overtime pay.

Oh, wait, they've gone on strike, no woodchucking at all.
Her Royal Spriteness
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i have to wonder how many wood chucks would chuck norris chuck, and would he use numchucks?

You can’t truly call yourself peaceful unless you are capable of violence. If you’re not capable of violence, you’re not peaceful. You’re harmless.

The Linebacker
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Quote by sprite
i have to wonder how many wood chucks would chuck norris chuck, and would he use numchucks?


numchucks for sure.
Troublemaker
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Where's this wood that needs chucking?
"insensitive prick!" – Danielle Algo
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Quote by Buz
The woodchucks have unionized, and it now takes 5 woodchucks to chuck 1 piece of wood per hour. Anymore and they get overtime pay.

Oh, wait, they've gone on strike, no woodchucking at all.


You're such a fear mongering capitalist. How can overtime be part of the answer to a timeless question?


===  Not ALL LIVES MATTER until BLACK LIVES MATTER  ===

The Linebacker
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Quote by noll


You're such a fear mongering capitalist. How can overtime be part of the answer to a timeless question?


It's the new age question taking dominance over the old age question. What happens when it starts taking a dozen woodchucks to change a lightbulb? Well, obviously those would be government employee woodchucks. Or worse, if woodchucks become placed in charge of flood control in The Netherlands. Would woochuck immigrants be required to meet the demand. And would the German woodchucks want to import German beer? And would the French woodchucks demand that everyone speak French? And just how much wood needs to be chucked? Do woodchucks smoke pot? Consider the mass quantities of Cheetos and Twinkies will be needed to satisfy the increased munchie demand. So you see, it's not simple to answer. Obviously, someone has to work overtime to figure this out. Is there enough money budgeted to get this done?
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Quote by honeydipped


rrrreeeemmmmiiiixxxx!!!!


How am I just now seeing this!!! Omg it’s awesome
Active Ink Slinger
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Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris?
A: ALL OF IT
Active Ink Slinger
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WELCOME Emmanuelle, to this website. I'm glad to see you joining in here with the rest of us. I hope you enjoy yourself. We're a pretty good group, well...with the possible exception of that LikeToWrite person. He can be a bit crazy at times.

Quote by PrincessC

First you ask the question, why is knowing relevant and necessary?

No PrincessC, I would think that would be the last thing anyone would want to ask. The moment someone poses that question, this whole thought becomes moot and academic, simply because there is no sane answer. A sane person wouldn’t risk tying his or her tongue in knots while attempting to say those words, let alone spend time, thought and effort writing up the conditions by which such a survey would be meaningful. ? However, upon further consideration, and following several consultations with numerous experts, I can see where such a question would be valid.

To add to what a couple of posters have said, I think to qualify the solution in a meaningful manner, there are several more things we would have to consider. Not only the time of day, but also the humidity and air temperature. If it was hot, it’s a possibility the woodchucks would be lazy and work at a slower pace, thereby throwing all test results askew. If Saturday were the day picked to conduct this prestigious survey, we would have to consider the very real possibility, that those chosen might be suffering hangovers from the late Friday night party they attended to celebrate having their names drawn. Another particularly important consideration nobody has thought of yet, is what is their gender and how many of each sex will be participating? It is a well accepted fact that female humans talk much faster and say more words then their male counterparts. It seems to me that if the female woodchuck talks faster than the male, doesn’t it make sense she would also chuck wood faster also? Does this trait apply to woodchucks? If it does, what kind of formula could we devise that would accurately factor this difference into the results? Buz mentioned that all woodchucks have unionized, so what part, if any, does their union play in this assessment, and do they have any financial interest in the results? To avoid any possibility of future legal actions by P.E.T.A., (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) it will be necessary to have an official representative present. I suggest the first course of action would be to set up a steering committee that would have the responsibility of not only specifying the required procedures, but later analyzing and publishing the results.
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Advanced Wordsmith
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Not as much as they could if they owned the Binford Tools 4500 Woodchucker. This amazing machine has MORE POWER to handle any woodchucking emergency...