When we're 18, we look at 16 year olds as immature. When we're 20, we look at 18 year olds as emotionally inferior. When we're 30, we look at 20-somethings as idealistic and foolish. When we're 40 we look at 30 year olds as inexperienced. When we're 60, we look at 40 year olds as unwise and unlived...blah, blah, blah
So my question is...at what age to people actually get it? Or do the standards rise with our age? Or...is it possible that we tend try and find something in our younger counterparts in order to assuade our own age related insecurities?
I think some people 'never get it'...
I think life experience, maturity, and the ability to intelligently reflect back on our experiences and gain some learnings from them help add credibility and weight to our opinions. And these things are not necessarily correlated to age.
I'm at a detriment with three social factors that shouldn't mean anything, but do... I'm a twenty-something, I'm female, and I'm blonde.
The desire to typecast in a certain way is very typical in life... and even in an online space that is supposed to be about what someone is saying, not the visual first impressions.
I certainly don't think I 'know it all' or that I'm superior in any way to someone older (or younger) than me. I base impressions on what comes out of their mouth or what they write. But it's kind of sad when ageism creates a level of condescension. I have a lot to learn from people older than I am, and I think the same goes vice versa.
The minute someone assumes they 'get it' or 'know it all', it really just shows they don't get it at all.
This is the first time that someone has referred to me as emotionally inferior, idealistic fool, inexperienced, unwise4 and unlived in one post.
No worries, I think 16year olds are too horny to think straight. I think my own age gap is too eager to do everything they get told about. I think 20 years olds are in that 'don't appreciate what we have' stage. I think 30year olds are too broody and 40year olds are way too judge mental. I think 60year olds should get over birthdays and start thinking about the bucket list and live a little.
Each age gap has their own worries, the only thing we should 'get' is that we make our own happiness, if you are unhappy, you're obviously not doing enough. If you are happy in your own life, you wont judge others for theirs.
I "got it" ages ago. Just can't remember where the hell I put it now.
Age related insecurities? I don't accept that premise at all.
Get what?
When you say 'Get it?' just what kind of point are you getting at.
There are two things that come to my mind on this topic.
First I recently read a quote, "Every generation believes it is smarter than the one before it and wiser than the one after it."
The other is...
When you are 20 you are worried about what everone is thinking about you.
When you are 40 you don't care what others are thinking about you.
When you are 60 you realize that they never were thinking about you.
No one ever gets it, but some fit in better than others.
Personal Opinion-Age has nothing to do with maturity.
Let's put a smile on that face.
I grew up being used to being allowed to participate in "grown up" conversations, and since I have read the newspaper daily since I was 13 years old, I've always been knowledgeable in what was going on in the world, and developed my own opionions about it.
Growing up in that type of environment made it, and still makes it even more frustrating when someone seems to dismiss my opinions or ideas for something as ridiculous (to me) as age, experience, or formal education.
I'm not sure anyone ever "gets it." I think the ones who are closest to that are the ones who never stop asking questions and trying to learn something new, even when they are in their 90s. I do believe you gain a little something with age, which is part of why I enjoy listening to a good storyteller talk about the old days, or the lessons he or she has learned. Because, if I can learn something from their experiences, that could be one less mistake I make, or maybe the knowledge will enable me to have new experiences I never could have had without that knowledge.
I don't think there is a point where someone "get's it" and then everything stops. I think there is always something to learn and a part of yourself that you haven't explored yet. We're here to live life to the fullest; to ask questions; to explore; to share. The most fun you will ever have is when you throw yourself into your fears and realise that the only thing you were afraid of was your self. Life gets exciting, relationships get more intimate, sex gets interesting.. ;)
I am having a bit of trouble phrasing what I want to say, but I will give it a shot. I think a lot of people make assumptions based on age. I am told I look and act a lot older then I am. Then as soon as I say I am 19, people sometimes automatically feel like they have to avoid certain topics around me because I am "too young." Yet I have a higher maturity level then a lot of people my age. I have lived on my own, had to take care of my self since I was younger, I have seen more of the world then most people, had to deal with and see things that most people never do, and should never have to.
And sorry Damon, I think I may have gone off topic - I didn't really understand your question. Sorry.
My understanding of your question is that it refers to socially dysfunctional attitudes of some people regarding differences in age. A person who “gets it” understands the meaning of the old Byrds' song "Turn! Turn! Turn”, which by the way was totally adapted from the Book of Ecclesiastes. No matter what your views on religion, and I am an atheist and libertarian, you cannot deny the truth no matter where you find it. Here are a few lines.
To Everything
There is a season
And a time to every purpose, under Heaven
A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep
I embraced this idea when I was still in my teens. There is something romantic about it.
I may have been 27 when I overheard a group of teenagers seriously discussing with passion the existence of god. I was fascinated, recognizing my voice at that age. It could have been my friends and I as teens. I realized listening to them that life is a cycle, we grow from one stage to another. What was obvious for me at 27 was something these teenagers were leaning for themselves. “There is a time for everything under the sun.”
Being able to relate with people younger or older than you is dependent on how open minded you are. People younger than you will be having experiences that are fresh and new to them but not to you. People older than you might have views and understandings that only come with age and experience. When these views and understandings are profound we write books about them. Older than you is relative.
When our age becomes a primary characteristic of our identity, then we have chosen superficiality over substance. I have met some very profound 19 year old people and some very ignorant 50 year old ones.
I hope I never get it. To me, that would mean I've stopped learning.
I like little surprises, discovering something about myself or someone else that I didn't expect. It's what makes life interesting.
Two posts in a row, rare but not unheard of.
Anyway, I was thinking about relationships between generations defined by age. I have a friend who is a lot younger than I am. She gorgeous, athletic, educated. I am Caucasian, she is not. The age difference is significant. I have taken my time over the past three years getting to know her because I like her and think she is interesting. There is always underlying sexual tension of sorts but minimized because I know that any sexual moves on my part (or hers) would be a mistake.
To have a friendship with her I have had to give her space so she can figure out on her own that I am no threat. The differences in ages are real due to experience and other factors yet rather than see them as walls and boundaries I see them as part of the relationship mosaic that has to be dealt with. There are parts of her life where she is leaning the same kinds of things I learned when I was her age. I listen, encourage but don't tell her how to live her life just because I have been through it because I know that we each have to live our own lives in our own way. Most experiences we share are on par. Somethings she is better at than I am, which I acknowledge.
The point is that real and lasting relationships are complex and difficult. We deny ourselves when we create artificial barriers rather than overcome stereotyping our lives.
I was 18 and didn't "get it" but then I met some kids who are 13-16 and they do. It's different for different people.
I see that some here "Get It"!
"IT" being defined as the time of realization, the Ah HA moment. The epiphany moment. Through my many years of life, I have had moments like this, Also many moments that I thought I knew it. Most of the latter moments I was in some way, gentle as well as "In you face", slapped down for them.
Everyone has their own interpretation of what "getting it" means & this is what keeps these forums going. Hearing different opinions from others can be informative & educational as well> Some posts that are of no value to myself are to others. I "get it." For myself to "get it" seems to be a never ending process because things can change at a split second. Never knowing what tomorrow brings, the one thing I do know is to expect it will involve "getting it." For the present I feel that I "get it." How a person conducts his or her life & the way they treat other people to me is a part of "getting it" constantly requiring adjustments to meet the present needs. If you are making bad choices in what you are doing with you life & you know these choices are wrong then you are definitely not "getting it."
Didnt mean to call you broody, but I find that women from about 28-> get all baby/marry crazy "shudders"
