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which do you like the most ?
Quote by SweetPenny
I've never been whipped, but I have been belted and paddled. I found the paddle to be much harsher than the belt. I remember rolling off his lap and sitting on the floor, protecting my bottom, and refusing to go back over his knee :-)
Quote by Goddess_Lexi
The whip... Leaves more of a stink that lasts longer!
Quote by overmykneenow
Paddles have a far too inorganic action for my liking, I find even rulers are too rigid - they will often leave one feeling too disconnected from the subject (I can also appreciate that may be the attraction for some people).
You won't get the same response from lightly trailing a paddle over someone's skin as you will with a leather belt.
Of course, neither are as effective as an open palm, especially if combined with the other hand firmly holding your subject in place.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Oak_and_the_Reed
Quote by overmykneenow
Paddles have a far too inorganic action for my liking, I find even rulers are too rigid - they will often leave one feeling too disconnected from the subject (I can also appreciate that may be the attraction for some people).
You won't get the same response from lightly trailing a paddle over someone's skin as you will with a leather belt.
Of course, neither are as effective as an open palm, especially if combined with the other hand firmly holding your subject in place.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Oak_and_the_Reed
Quote by overmykneenow
Paddles have a far too inorganic action for my liking, I find even rulers are too rigid - they will often leave one feeling too disconnected from the subject (I can also appreciate that may be the attraction for some people).
You won't get the same response from lightly trailing a paddle over someone's skin as you will with a leather belt.
Of course, neither are as effective as an open palm, especially if combined with the other hand firmly holding your subject in place.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Oak_and_the_Reed
Quote by Sensei
That raises some questions for me.
1. Did you refuse because he had gone past your limits and you were squicked?
2. If the answer to 1 is yes, did you have a safeword? Did you use it?
Consent is key to these kinds of activities. Both parties need to feel that they can perform these activities safely. The dom needs to trust that the sub continues to consent, perhaps in the face of behavior (crying, screaming, etc) that would ordinarily be counter-indicative. The dom can only rely on the fact that the sub has *not* called out the safeword, and can really only feel safe to proceed if he feels that the sub *would* call it out if they needed to. At the same time, the sub needs to feel safe to use the word. They must trust that if they use it, that the dom will take them out-of-scene (which includes clearing all restraints) and immediately offer after-care in a context without hierarchy, and further that there will be no future repercussions from using it (with the possible exception that there will be no repeat of whatever caused them to use the safeword to start with).
Quote by SweetPenny
I missed this. Sorry for not responding sooner.
I did not use my safeword. I tend to avoid them as I feel they can really be a mood killer. The man whom I was with did realize that I was having a difficult time and he lightened up after that. It was his first time using a paddle so I think that was the problem.