After twenty years of marriage, my wife confessed to a three-year long affair with a co-worker. This happened after the co-worker’s wife learned of the affair.

After my wife confessed to her affair, I was a wreck. I left her (and my sons) and moved in with our bachelor friend, staying there about four months. We both discussed divorce; my wife said she was sorry and did not want a divorce. With two sons getting ready to go to college, I decided to stay. It came to a point where it was affecting my concentration, especially in my job.

One day when I was in Lowe's, I saw a close friend of the co-worker that my wife had the affair with. I asked him if the co-worker ever confided with him about my wife. One of the things that he told me; I remember vividly. He said the co-worker told him that my wife, “Really knew how to turn it on in bed, she knows how to bring it.”

I finally realized that I could not control what my wife was going to do. My mindset started to change.

I told my wife that I was okay if she wanted to have sex with another guy. She told me that she wouldn’t do that. After my mindset change, which took over a year for me to get to that point, my sexual outlet has been fantasizing about my wife being with her co-worker and her being with other guys. I realized that I was not satisfying her, so I set her free. I tried to get her involved with a couple of our bachelor friends; she would not go there.

I finally succeeded on our trip to New Orleans during Mardi Gras. After an afternoon of walking the streets (never got my wife to flash), we stopped in a bar where we met a couple of elder widowers. By that time, my wife had had a lot to drink. Long story short, one of the guys (Herb) ended up in our hotel room; the rest is history.

After her encounter with Herb, once again I tried to get something going with her and our bachelor friends; nothing doing. My next victim was our termite inspector, Alex, whom we have known for years. Alex lost his wife to cancer several years ago. My wife and I went to her funeral. It took a while for Alex to get over that. He would tell us of how much he missed her and said that he would never get into a relationship with another woman.

Alex comes around every six months and about a year after his wife’s death, he started flirting more with my wife, which I told him I was okay with. I could tell that my wife felt a lot of empathy for Alex and would flirt right back. Long story short; after several visits of me pushing her, I succeeded.

With Alex in the picture, she is opening up more and more about her past. I suspected that there were things going on with her and her boss and one other guy (other than her co-worker with whom she had the affair). She would tell me a few things about these other guys, trying to satisfy my suspicions.

I am now learning that there was more to her earlier stories. I probably would have never learned about her escapades with her boss and the other guy if my mindset had not changed. She also has started to tell me about her encounters at conferences. I never suspected anything with her and her conference buddies; what an eye opener for me, and this is just evolving. Actually, I am getting a “charge” out of listening to her.

I decided to start documenting her escapades; It is very time consuming. Just about every day, I go over what I have written and ask my wife more questions. There are days that she is not very responsive. I usually wait to quiz her on days she is drinking wine, which is most days. After she is on her last glass of wine, her lips become looser.

I try to get as much detail out of her as possible. After she tells me something, I try to get her to tell me how things got to that point, what was she thinking/experiencing at that moment. I plan on publishing these, starting with her very first encounter with another man (Charles).

Sharing her stories has become my outlet. My wife and I both have professional careers, so I have to be discrete. Also, my wife is not aware that I am documenting and sharing her sexual escapades. Stay tuned.