It was bad enough that Ainsely slammed the bedroom door, but hearing the lock click, I realized she was really angry this time. I was still pretty ticked myself, not especially at her, but more at the situation we were in.
But sitting there alone in the living room, sipping a bourbon and water, I started to really think this through. It was time to tell myself the truth. Ainsely might well never have gotten beyond the friends stage with another guy without my instigation. Honestly, she was doing this because I wanted her to. I'd taken the cork out of the bottle and now the genie was out. As much as I didn't want to acknowledge it, I had to admit that I really had no idea of where or how fast this could go. I'd just been thinking with my dick about a porn fantasy, but now I would have to live with the consequences.
My beautiful loving wife, my new wife, she was only human. You can't expect a girl to do things like I'd been pushing her into without it affecting her. Even if that was part of the turn on, again there would be consequences.
Javon wasn't exactly making me happy the way he kept pushing her to make their relationship more public. But being a testosterone driven male, he had every right to be attracted to my wife, and since she'd responded as she had—as I'd pushed her to—he had every right to pursue her. Why couldn't he just enjoy what we gave him and not have this need to parade her around in public?
I wasn't able to come to any clear conclusions or plot out any carefully thought out next steps. I mean, after all, I was into my second bourbon and water before I got up to do something. But doing anything would make me feel better than doing nothing.
I knocked gently on the bedroom door, holding a tray. “Want something to eat?” I said to the locked door. No answer. I set the tray down on the floor, telling her that I was leaving it and going back down stairs. I'm no chef so I'd just made her a deli ham and cheese sandwich with lettuce tomato and pickles, mayonaise on one side and mustard on the other, just the way she likes it. Some fritos and a glass of milk completed my peace offerring.
Back on the sofa, I sat there in the dark and resumed drinking and thinking. When I heard the door open upstairs, and then close again, I sat still, holding my breath. I didn't hear anything else for another half hour, but then I heard her come out of the bedroom, go into the bathroom, and then return to the bedroom, door closing behind her. I waited another while, then crept quietly upstairs. The tray was on the floor, the food gone. I tried the door, but it was locked.
“Honey,...” I pleaded with her gently through the door, “I'm sorry. I realize this is all my fault. I'm so sorry I got so upset about it.” No answer. “I hope the sandwich was okay. I tried to make it like you like it.” No answer. So I went back downstairs, expecting I'd be sleeping on the couch. About an hour later, I was dozing when I heard her come out of the bedroom to go to the bathroom again.
I went upstairs to find the bedroom door still closed. One last try. I knocked gently. “Anyone want a massage,” I chuckled.
“You can come in,” she said in this mousy little voice. The door was unlocked. She was sitting on the bed in a t-shirt and panties. Her dress was on the back of the chair and her heels piled on the floor, her hair down and her eyes red. “Thanks for the sandwich,” she said, not really looking at me.
I repeated my apologies as I sat on the bed next to her, rubbing her neck. I told her afresh I realized this wouldn't have happened if it hadn't been for my stupid fantasies and that I was willing to accept anything that came from it.
“Javon said you'd come around,” she said.
“What?” I asked, stunned.
“I called him to tell him what a jerk you were being. He said he noticed and thought you went a little overboard just because our secret was kinda out. He said you shoulda known this had to happen eventually. He asked me if you tried to hurt me and said he'd come get me if I wanted him to.”
Shocked. “Did you want him to?” I asked fearfully, gently rubbing her shoulders and neck.
She stopped me and turned to look at me. Serious expression, studying my face, she said, “I thought about it. The truth is I almost told him to come. But I didn't. I don't even know why.” Then she hugged me and kissed my cheek. “Oh baby, don't ever do that again. Don't make me feel like any of this is my fault, cause it isn't.” Then she peeled her t-shirt off over her head and laid back into my lap.
“I know,” I admitted with as much humility as I could muster. I took my time on the massage. Starting with her head and neck, her face, her shoulders her arms, the down her belly and legs, her quads, her calves, her feet, then she turned over and I did her back, slowly, patiently, doing my best to make her purr with the pleasure I'd learned to give her with a little practice. Her mind seemed to be clearing as her body relaxed, exactly what I'd done.
“What are we gonna do if this—you and Javon together so much—gets out?” I asked her trying to show that I was concerned about the thing that bothered her too. “What if word gets around and you get a 'reputation?'
She chuckled softly at that. “Too late to be worried about that,” she said. “Too many people saw us today, and I think the few people on post that don't know about us already will know all about it soon.
She continued slowly, as though she were thinking it through as she spoke. “I know you were concerned about me and my reputation. Don't kid yourself though, you're worried about everybody on post knowing your some kind of pervert for pushing your wife to cuckold you. But I believe you when you say you were concerned most about me.
“But to be totally honest, you should know that I sorta let this happen. Javon came over and we fucked all day. Then he wanted me to go out with him. He even picked the dress he wanted me to wear. I knew it would be a risk. But I went. I guess my fantasies or my lust took over, but I wanted to go. I don't know how I was thinking I could control it, but I know now there was no way to keep it all quiet.”
“It's taken me a while to realize that too. Honey I love you so much and would never want you hurt or embarrassed in any way, but it looks like this is beyond us controlling it. Even if you stopped seeing him this minute, I don't think the rumors and damage to your reputation would stop.”
“Well you don't have to worry about that,” she said, “cause it ain't gonna happen.” That threat, that certainty hung between us for a few awful moments. Then getting this playful smile on her face, she teased, “You shouldn't leave me unchaperoned with him. I don't seem to be able to keep my panties on when he's around.”
I finally massaged her to sleep and lay beside her awake for a couple of hours, just gently stroking my hand slowly over the curve of her hip, enjoying the soft touch of her body as she slept.
******
I drove Jack to work the next morning so I'd have the car to run up to Louisville to get all of my paperworks turned in and give them the first check. By 11:000 AM I was back and was sitting on the floor of Carolyn's living room playing Candyland with her little blonde three year old girl. Carolyn's eleven month old son was running around driving his cars all over my back, trying to disrupt our board game and generally being a pain. He was supposed to have gone down for a nap, but wouldn't stop crying when I tried that.
I'd gotten roped into babysitting for Carolyn so she and Mike could go to her prenatal appointment. I didn't know Mike very well. He was never around when I was over at Carolyn's visiting and seemed to be a very passive vanilla sort of guy. It wasn't hard to understand why Carolyn was cuckolding him so openly.
For almost two hours, I got tortured by her kids. I was wearing a mid-thigh skirt—Javon asked me not to wear pants anymore—so I had to be careful to keep it covering me while down on the floor. Her son kept trying to get in my shirt to nurse on my breast since Carolyn let him do that whenever he wanted and her daughter kept telling me I had to let him or she would cry. I tried to get both of them to take a nap, but they were having none of it. A truce only resulted when I got them apple juice and parked them in front of Sesame Street.
Finally the door opened and in waltzes Carolyn, big bellied and glowing, on the arm of Richard, her black boyfriend. I don't know where they dumped Mike, but it was obvious that they didn't need him for what they had planned. Carolyn asked me to please just take care of the kids a while longer because she had to go upstairs and take care of Richard. I really didn't have a choice.
“Why don't you take them for a walk?” she suggested helpfully as Richard wrapped his arms around her unbuttoning her blouse. Wanting to get away from that I plopped her son in his stroller, helped her daughter get her sandals on and headed out the door. I kept them out for quite a while hoping Richard would be gone when I brough them back. They were both getting fussy and hard to handle when we headed back toward the house.
“Serves you right, you little slut.” I'd never seen the woman before. She wasn't that much older than me, but was dressed very conservative, long dress, hair up in a bun. “Too bad you never learned to keep your legs together, dearie.” I blushed crimson, realizing she thought these were my babies as I wrestled with Carolyn's daughter who just then broke free and ran over to pet the woman's yappy little dog.