As the BMW comes to a stop in our driveway, what I hear next makes me realize that things just went from bad to pure hell.
A shrill voice fills the neighborhood. “Sister Sue, I’ve missed you so much.”
Under my breath I mumble, “Oh boy, they brought her.”
Mom waves for me to join her on the front porch to greet our guests. Rolling my eyes, I realize it's pointless to argue. First thing I see is Kat strutting up the walk with arms wide open to hug mom. Only thing is, she's a knockout. Her long shiny straight black hair, and those dark brown eyes shimmer, even in the dusk of this late evening.
As a teenage boy, seventeen in a month, I don’t see her as a step-aunt. All I see is her bouncing tits in a loose-fitting tank top.
Eventually, Mom yells at me, “Stop staring, she’s family!” Even she shakes her head with a look to suggest that Kat has really grown since the wedding.
With a warm hug and a smile, she greets her. "Welcome, Kat. I see you remember me, and this is my son Rick."
"Oh yes, Ricky… hi," she dismissively mumbles, heading for the door. I've always hated being called that. Can't the family see I'm not a kid anymore? They called me that as a boy and introduced me that way at Grandma's wedding four years ago. Kat was condescending back then too, completely ignoring me to talk with her cousins. Of course, she'd remember that. God, can this day get any worse? She even lays it on thick as she walks away. Her long, sleek, tan legs make her round sexy hips sway, in the jean shorts barely covering them. Just above them is her hair, long and sexy blowing in the wind.
It’s my mom's turn to show excitement with a warm hug, greeting her company, “Hi mom. Mike, glad to see you again.”
Grandma met Mike after a conference in New York. A couple of months later, we were all floored when they announced their engagement. He and Kat moved down to live with Grams, and the rest is history. He's only two years older than Mom. Sleazeball! I decided to be nice and greet them as mom invites them in for a late dinner.
Grams lives in Atlanta and has friends in Houston. Mom and I live in rural, third-world Mississippi so she and Mike visit with us sometimes when traveling there and back. They usually use it as their summer vacation, like this time. This the first time they brought “Her Snootiness” though.
At the dinner table there's just room for us five, and great, she sits next to me. While the conversation drones on about makeup, and fashion and family talk, Mike is glued to his cell phone, and before long at all, he is in the living room to watch sports alone. This is his usual habit. Kat is completely ignoring me again, except that her leg keeps grazing mine way too much. She keeps crossing and re-crossing her legs. Every time she does her leg touches mine and I try to hide my discomfort. Embarrassment is the only thing keeping me from getting an erection. I can’t take this torture anymore, lie about being tired, and go to my bedroom downstairs.
I lie awake in bed as I’m weirdly drawn to the conversation upstairs. Despite her annoying voice, Kat is very outspoken with many funny quotes. I can’t help but laugh at her out-of-nowhere remarks like:
“He could eat the ass out of a cupcake.”
“She wouldn’t shut up if you put a gun to her head.”
“Don’t get me wrong, he’s an awesome fucking Pope”
Grams is right there with her with lines like:
“Roll me in shit and dip me in cracker crumbs,” and, “He wouldn’t say shit if he had a mouthful.”
I never heard language like this before from anyone but Grandma. Mom is far too polite for language like that. After hours of girl talk, they finally make tracks for bed and I too fall asleep.
I awake at the crack of noon Saturday. I put a robe over my Pj's and gracefully stumble into the kitchen. I make some cereal. Mom strolls in from the deck in her swimsuit to tell me to hurry up and eat, throw on my trunks, and join our company by the pool. Mothers!
I take as long as I feel I can get away with, avoiding the inevitable. Walking onto the deck, I'm stunned to see Kat's sexy backside as she lies face down to tan herself. I thought she was naked at first, but she’s actually wearing a flesh-colored G-string and her bikini is undone for tanning. Despite my every instinct, I force myself to keep walking and join Mom, and Grams opposite of her before, it's too late. The last thing I want is Mom or Mike glaring at me for being a guy again. I hope my hard-on shrinks before anyone can notice. Mike is glued to his phone so he’s oblivious, thank goodness.
After only a couple of minutes of talking with Mom and Grandma about summer plans I hear: "Ricky, can you get me some ice water? I'm parched."
I shoot Mom a “do-I-have-to” look, and she replies with “you-better” glance.
I get up and grunt, “My name is Rick!” and dutifully go to the kitchen.
Kat springs out of the sun chair as soon as I walked on the deck. Her bikini top, I’m guessing about a size too small, barely held in those jiggling marvels of hers. She lays back down and all I can do is stare, so long in fact that her dad starts to stare at me.
I tell mom that I’m going to play video games. I head downstairs, play some tunes, and get some aggression out. Before long, I hear that annoying shrill again.
“Is that Assassin's Creed Origins?” She asks.
"Yeah, Kat. Come on down," I grumbled in reply. It turns out she can really play. She kicked my ass a couple times. As we continue she changes and becomes sister-like. We make fun of our mistakes with an occasional “nice one” thrown in there. I finally work up the courage to ask some questions.
“So why did your dad drag you to this piss-ant place?”
"He's an overprotective lame ass. He hates my twenty-two-year-old boyfriend Troy, and after the party he brought me to, I'm on dad detention. So, we went to his friend's place just to hang out in the back when the police came for a noise complaint, and they "smelled weed." I never saw any. Upstairs some sixteen-year-old girls were giving blow jobs and anal, while others were drinking beer, and stuff. Everyone got arrested. I only had soda and did none of that other crap, I swear. Besides, I'm nineteen, not a child anymore. Fuck my life!"
Mike must have been listening to us because before I could react, we’re called to lunch. She plays footsie with me under the table until I figure that two can play. I hold her foot down and released it right as she gives a good tug. There's a loud disruptive bang on the table as her knee hits it from below. She turns red and backpedals to the adults, and I laugh out loud at her.
After lunch, we decide to go retro and play Battle Tetris. Every time she clears a Tetris she yells "It's a mistake!" right before her video game character says the same thing. Later I say, "Bam, bam!" for my character as I clear lines. We start elbow shoving and everything is cool until she misses. Swinging her arm wildly, she completely sideswipes me, and her head falls square into my lap. The room becomes completely quiet. I instantly start to get hard as her bikini is an inch above my manhood. That heavenly cleavage is just dangling there in silence. She stares at me, and I don’t know what to say or do.
Suddenly her phone rings and she leaves to talk to her Troy. I die of embarrassment. She now knows how much of a lame virgin I am.
She goes back to sunbathing, and everyone leaves me alone until we all go out for dinner. Being so close to the Gulf, Grandma wants locally caught fish, so Mom takes us out to a place. The restaurant is a crazy mix of bar and grill, and fish market. I keep mostly to myself as the adults banter on. Kat divides her time between hitting on the male server and staring at all the men in her view. At least she's leaving me alone, aside from the occasional inquisitive glance. As they are leaving for Texas after breakfast tomorrow, everyone decides to go back to Mom's and have an earlier evening.
I immediately go to watch a movie as Mom and Grandma never seem to tire of catching up and other talks. Before long, Kat slinks downstairs and sits next to me. Here we go again.
She sits up straight with a serious look on her face and hair down her shoulders. Looking gorgeous she says, “Can we talk?”
I pause the movie, sit up and say, “Sure. S'up?”
With those deep beautiful brown eyes, she sheepishly hesitates. “I-I want to apologize for all the teasing, and calling you Ricky earlier. I’ve been on a short leash for so long, and well. I’m a bigger flirt that I realize sometimes. It’s so damn boring up there. Can I stay here and watch the movie with you?”
The movie is Deadpool, and there are enough action and comedy scenes that I quickly forget all about it. Sometime, I don't know when, she puts her head on my shoulder, and throws my arm around hers. Her hand is on my chest. After I realize what happened, I get a massive hard-on. I look at her in panic. Without saying a word, she shoots me an "It's alright" look and relaxes even further into our embrace. I doze off, and before I know it the movie is over.
She gets up, looks at me funny, and says, “Goodnight, Rick!” before heading upstairs.
“Night,” is all my lame self can come up with.
Next morning at breakfast she sits beside me again, and I don’t mind the attention as much this time. As everyone talks about the trip to Texas, I look over and realize she’s bra-less. Seeing my double take, she just smiles back like nothing is wrong.
Changing the mood, Kat asks, “Can I have your number? It’s a long car ride and maybe we can play Tank Wars on the net or something.” She calms me down, kinda, with a reassuring pat on my thigh, and we exchange numbers before eating.
After breakfast, bags get packed and everyone is saying goodbye at the door.
Kat fakes a full-blown panic. "Oh shit, I left my phone downstairs. Rick, can you help me find it?"
No sooner do I get down there before she is leaning over in that low-cut blouse of hers with a finger on her lips telling me to be quiet. She plops me on the couch, puts her hands on my shoulders, and gives me a full unobstructed view of those heavenly girls. The ends are so small, dark and hard.
Looking at me with a devilish grin she yells, “Now where the hell...”
She leans over to kiss me sloppily on the lips and says, “Goodbye for now.”
Boing!
“Found it!” Kat yells.
“Now if you’re a good boy, and don’t masturbate too much, I might even show you how to use that thing when I get back.” She pats the inseam of my jeans and bounces to the stairs.
“Coming!”
The last thing I hear is a not so shrill voice talking to Mom. “Bye sis, love you. See you soon.”
The car ride seems long for her. Kat keeps texting in between games, and just rants about anything and everything. Then she drops contact for a couple days. Out of nowhere, my phone starts blowing up again. They are all messages from her.
Kat: OMG! Shit’s getting really fucking weird over here. I am really freaking out
Me: Yeah
Kat: Mom & dad are acting like mad animals
Me: What’s up
Kat: Sure you want to know. This is your grandma
Me: I’d expect anything from you. Jk. What’s up
Kat: Your grandma is way more of a cougar than I ever thought. Drinking wine like candy. All kinds of sex jokes. Her dad & Beth have been gone for hours
Me: Get out no way
Kat: Yes. Her other friend Jane has been hitting on me all night. EWWW
Me: So Grams is a slut
Kat: Totally. Rip off my head and fill me with Drano. Disgusting. And this is ME we’re talking about
Me: I think I’m sick
Kat: Sorry Rick. I had to talk to someone
Me: I understand, just damn
As fast as her tornado of sex and panic hit, the line becomes dead again. So, I do what I do whenever I’m this confused about anything: I turn to Mom. I wait until she gets back from work the next night and show her the texts.
She calmly hands back the phone and says, “Doesn't surprise me one bit. Now that you're older, you should hear some of the things Grandma and I talk about. The main reason I didn't join them this time is things are still nuts at work with the new promotion and all. By the way, son, did you enjoy Kat hitting on you as much as the rest of us?"
“W-w-what? Did you just say what I think you said?” My mind is at full tilt right now, not believing anything I’m hearing at all.
"Yes, son. There's more to me than just being a mom you know. After dinner Saturday night, Kat heard Grandma and I talking about the week in Houston, and bringing you was talked about. Kat said how sweet and innocent you are. Grandma suggested taking you with this week. I said that Houston would be way too much for you, but if Kat is safe, she could have some time with you when she got back. Just be careful as Mike still has no clue about the two of you. Evidently, Texas is more than even what Kat thought possible. I'm glad I had you stay.”
