No, it was not a regular thing to do. Not for Kristy anyway. But it was summer and at least once or twice a year she tried to be brave enough and just do it. Going to the beach, that is. Kristy had not done it for a whole year, but the temperature was rising and the urge to go won over her fear of exposing her body in a swimsuit to countless strangers staring at it in disdain.

Kristy considered herself a fatty. That is what she had been called since schooldays. From some point onwards that was also what she called herself. Not plus size, not curvy – or whatever politically correct alternative had become popular in recent years. She was a fat girl. Period. She could see it when she looked at herself in the mirror.

A little more than five feet, she was way too heavy. But she had always been. It did not happen overnight and it was not her fault. It was just the way her body was built. She could stop eating or exercise all day, and it would not change. Chubby cheeks, wobbly belly, meaty arms, thunder thighs with a pattern of cellulite, that looked like a map of the lunar soil and – in the everlasting words of her aunt Dana – “a horse’s ass that would only fit in stretch jeans or sweatpants.” (Aunt Dana was a bony old witch hating on everyone, but still her words made a lasting impression.)

Nobody found someone with a body like Kristy’s attractive, particularly not any man of distinguished taste. At least that was what she firmly believed in, and experience seemed to have proven her right. She had not been with a man in ages, and the few exceptions had been pretty unattractive themselves.

Yes, it was not all bad. She knew she had a nice face, even though her nose was way too big and looked like a turnip. She also had really cute hands and feet that were rather small, even by her standards. And yes, she was exceptionally well developed in the chest area. Her boobs had not stopped growing until her twenty-third birthday and always gave her trouble finding bras that fit. She could not imagine any woman having bigger areolas, but that was fine with her. Yet breasts as heavy as hers sagged immensely, even if she was only thirty-two, and when she lay on her back, they slid to the side. Nothing a man wants, either.

So going to the beach and exposing herself in a swimsuit was not something she enjoyed doing. She knew the looks, the pointing fingers, the remarks. And yet she did it once, maybe twice a year, because she actually loved the beach. And today was the day.

She had gotten herself a black tankini that would cover as much as possible. Finding one only remotely her size had been an ordeal, but it was the result that counted. So here she sat with her horse’s butt on her towel at the beach nearby, wearing her brand-new tankini, oversized sunglasses, and a sunhat with the largest brim she could get. None of it made her invisible, but at least it gave her a bit more comfort. She had brought her earbuds and listened to music, so whatever mockery might happen, she would not get to hear it.

The sun was warm but mild, the water glistened, and the heated-up sand under her feet felt lovely and slightly ticklish. Kristy enjoyed watching the people around her, those passing by, those getting in and out of the water and those just lying there in the sun just like her. She paid special attention to the guys, the single ones in particular. Not that she had any intention or even plans to approach any of them – she was way too shy and, well, her body – but fantasizing about the most handsome ones was something she liked a lot.

There were quite a few that set her imagination into motion. The obviously younger ones, not so much. She preferred men about her age or a little older. Like the one that she just had discovered. He was standing there, about eighty feet away from her, hands on his hips, looking at what was going on in the water. She liked to think that he was an observer just like her (which he certainly was not).

He had his back turned to her with his face looking slightly to the left. It was the only part she could see in profile, but it was enough to tell that he was a good-looking man, probably in his early forties. He wore tight black speedos which complimented his nicely shaped behind. His crack was showing where his two firm round buttocks met. Kristy loved male butts, and his was a particularly nice specimen.

As he slightly moved about ninety degrees into her direction, she could examine his look from the side. His butt was even rounder and stuck out even more than she had expected. He had a flat belly, nice chest and arms, neither of them too muscular, still rather well developed.

But none of it caught her attention as much as the considerable bulge in the front of his speedos. It looked as if he had put a tennis ball or something of comparable size in there. Kristy realized how she started to sweat. This guy was clearly way above average in the manhood department. She imagined how he would all of a sudden pull down his pants to free his lengthy penis and let her guess the exact size. Kristy giggled at the idea.

“Imagine he’d really do that,” she thought. “Everybody would just stop and stare!”

She giggled again, but the picture of his exposed sausage made her bite her lower lip and – but she hesitated. Was it really the word “sausage” that had just crossed her mind? How naughty of her. Another giggle. That was something she would never speak out loud.

Unfortunately, her handsome and well-endowed favorite man of the beach left all too soon for the water. Shortly after he started swimming, she lost sight of him.

"Another dream remains unfulfilled,“ she thought in somewhat bitter irony, knowing that a man like him would not even notice her, let alone be interested.

To some degree, she was relieved that he had not seen her. Watching him turn away, grossed out by her sight, was not something she would have wanted to experience. Instead, Kristy could hold on to the fantasy of him exposing the reason for his exceptional bulge in her presence. This time she didn’t giggle. This time she breathed a bit more intense.

Time passed. Noonday sun made her sleepy and she dozed off for a while. When she woke up, the music had stopped, and her phone was dead thanks to an empty battery. She hoped the device had not suffered from the heat and was done for good.

Kristy felt sweat rinsing everywhere. It was really hot now. The sun had added a few more degrees since she had fallen asleep. Should she venture into the water to cool off a bit? Yes, she did not feel comfortable with people watching her walk around in her swimsuit and see her belly, thighs, saggy boobs and horse’s butt jiggle like pudding, but the thought of cooling water on her skin making the heat go away was too tempting.

She got up and made it to the water without looking left or right. All she felt was the hot sand under her sensitive feet, urging her to walk faster, and the disapproving eyes on her body. A tank goes to war. A whale gets back to the sea. Those were the things they were thinking, some even saying. She knew it. She had heard it over and over again, since her teenage years. The first boy she had sex with (he had hardly been inside her when he came) later denied ever having been with her. Instead, he said mean things like, “Do you think I’d fuck a giant meatball?” – followed by hysterical laughter. No, it had never been easy being her.

The water was a relief. She walked a few feet in, but with the hat still on she did not mean to swim. The beach was packed now. She guessed it was around three pm, school was out; mothers with children and horny teenagers had flooded the place. Kristy looked around in the not-too-serious attempt to spot Mr. Handsome-With-The-Big-Bulge somewhere. Of course, she did not find him, and even though the chances had been slim from the start, she felt a sudden sense of true disappointment getting hold of her. There was something about him that stuck with her. And no, it was not just his oversized penis, for god’s sake!

When she got back to her towel, her mood had reached a strange low. At thirty-two she was alone at a fully packed beach with no man interested in her. What would it be like with forty-two? Or fifty-two? Things would most likely never change. Kristy did not think she deserved this, but then again, who deserves what anyway? Frustrated she grabbed her earbuds before she remembered that they were useless with an empty battery in her phone. This day would not get better anymore. Maybe it was time to leave, head home, and take care of the laundry. She grabbed her bag, unzipped it, and started packing.

“Excuse me, I hope I am not interrupting you with something important.”

The voice came from behind her. Kristy turned around.

“I’m not sure if this is appropriate to ask, but since it seems we’re both here without accompaniment, I was wondering if I could sit with you a little for some socializing and conversation.”

This could not be real. Was this the result of a sunstroke? Because if not, Kristy had no explanation for this profoundly unlikely turn of events. Mr. Handsome himself was standing there, right in front of her in his tight black speedos, asking for her company.

Totally perplexed, incredulous, clueless, she did not know how to react.

“I’m sorry. I guess I’ve crossed a line,” he said politely. "I didn’t mean to be intrusive. I’ll better leave.“

“No!” she almost yelled before she did her best to seem calm. “I mean, no, you have not been intrusive at all. It’s just,” – and then she forgot how to continue.

“It’s just?” he tried to help her with a little tongue-in-cheek smile.

“Erm, it’s just that I was deep in thought.”

Kristy heard herself speak while she feared she would pass out every moment. This was just too good to be true. He could not be serious. Maybe this was a prank, and he would end up mocking her like they all did sooner or later.

But in reality, nothing could be further from his mind. “Of course. Again, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt you. I had been sitting over there,“ - he pointed at someplace a little further away - “and noticed you early on today.”

He had noticed her? Did he actually say “noticed”? Kristy could believe neither her eyes nor ears.

“I must admit I couldn’t keep myself from looking over again and again because I think you’re, erm, well, you’re very nice to look at. I hope that’s not too straightforward.”

She had to gather her thoughts if she wanted to reply in a largely sane way. “That’s .. that’s very nice of you to say.”

Actually, never has anyone said something like that to her before.

“I’m glad. To be completely honest, I wanted to approach you before but lost my courage. I just stood there looking at the water and convinced myself that this is a stupid idea.”

I must have died and gone to heaven, Kristy thought. This was by no means the world she used to know. This adorable man had lost his courage to approach her? Her? The fat girl with the wobbly belly and the cellulite-ridden thunder thighs? She had adored him hours ago at a time when he actually had planned to come over and talk to her. At a time, when she had fantasized about him dropping his pants and showing her his long penis! And while she thought this thought, she realized that she had been staring at the front of his speedos since his last reply. For a second, she freaked out and looked away immediately.

He was aware of what she just did, smiled a little but pretended nothing had happened. Instead, he said, “So is it a stupid idea?”

Kristy’s heart was beating fast. It was impossible that he had not noticed her staring at his bulge. He just ignored it to not make her feel guilty. Oh, but how DID she feel guilty!

“It’s .. it’s not. Not a stupid idea at all.”

He replied with a big smile of relief, “Lucky me,” and sat down next to her.

Still struggling for composure, Kristy managed to smile back. She did not have the slightest clue where this was leading to.

(tbc)