War of the Worlds II - Part 9

My new friends took me, once suitably attired once more, to an underground drinking den not far from Paisley Abbey. I knew that my sister- in-law and family used to be staunch members of that church and made enquiries of my friends over a much needed libation.

A wean was sent over to find out more and returned shortly after, clearly very excited, to tell us in a broad accent that ‘Aye, therther an’ comin’ ower the noo! ‘Na’no?” I slipped him a shiny penny for his troubles.

To those who do not know the Glaswegian dialects (of which I am by no means an expert, hailing as I do from the north east of the country), that translates as “Yes, they are there, and are coming over immediately. And that, you know?”

The beers being served while my friends Phil, Rick and Jools had the clientele in absolute stitches with the story of my dramatic entrance into their lives were both the worst tasting and most appreciated in my memory.

“Come away then Doctur, get yer tadger oot and let’s see these legendary Martian killin’ baws!” shouted the cute little buxom barmaid.

Before I could answer over the laughter the door was flung open and a veritable hurricane flew into the room.

Everyone turned to see what the cause was.

“Whaur izzzee?” came this booming voice, commanding silence, attention, respect and direction. But I was already advancing towards her, arms spread. “Nicola!”

Tears flowed freely as we met, hugging each other as if we had never expected to see each other ever again. Which I suppose was the fact of the matter. It has been nigh ten years since we had last met, and two alien invasions and the death of her sister, my first wife Mary/Rachel, had happened in between.

The crowd cheered around us. I leaned over and whispered in her ear, “I’m glad that you arrived when you did, I feel I was just about to be cajoled into getting my ‘baws oot’.”

She backed away to arms length, somewhat taken aback. She glared around at the rapidly quieting crowd, and demanded of them, “Really, is that how you greet fine visitors from London to our parish? My kith and kin no less. Hassle them to show their baws in a public house? Have you no shame?”

She glared some more. The crowd moved back a step, cowed by her intensity.

The cute barmaid, Suzie, said quietly from the rear, “Well, we’re told by Phil that they’re somewhat legendary!”

“Legendary?!?! His baws? Awa’n’shite! Ah think ma sister, God rest her soul, mighta mentioned it. Well I think thats a legend I need to hear! But, before I do, we all know that a legend without proof is jist anither story. A myth, so help me God.”

She looked around our fellow revellers with a wicked grin starting to crease her lips and devilment in her eyes.

She held up a finger to her lips and the place went silent.

“If you all will join me in song,” she said very quietly so that everyone took a step back forward to hear her, “I’ll get the next round in.” The crowd erupted - there’s nothing gets a Scottish pub happier than the prospect of a drink at someone else’s expense.

It abated slowly under the calming instruction of Nicola. When everybody was quiet and ready she turned and looked up at me.

“Come on then, show us yer stanes Stein. Baws Oot! Baws Oot! Baws Oot!”

Of course the crowd shouted and cried out with her, stomping on the floor and banging glasses off the tables. “BAWS OOT! BAWS OOT! BAWS OOT!”

Well, I’ve never been in the entertainment industry, but sometimes the show must go on … Time for my debut public sex scene.

It must have been the beer … at least thats my excuse for taking the offered hand and stepping up on to the table and exposing my legendary baws to the crowd.

My genitals were met with first cheers then typical west coast jeers and friendly banter.

“Izzat aw it takes to be ca’ed legendary these days?”

“Poor lad must be feelin’ the cauld.”

“Fer fucks sake, ma bairns got a bigger cock than that! An’ she’s only twa!”

Nicola shut them all up again by sheer force of will as I stood exposed and embarrassed on the table. She turned to Suzie. “I’ll take over pouring pints. You put that big fat gob of yours to good use, he’s obviously just a wee bit shy wi’ strangers.”

With that Nicola winked up at me and they swapped positions to more cheers from the crowd. Suzie climbed up on the table and knelt before me, tying her long blonde hair up in a ponytail. She moved forward and moved my manhood to one side and slowly licked my balls from back to front and up the shaft.

She turned to the baying crowd and proclaimed in her best barmaids voice, “Yeah, these baws are fucking legendary - he’s waashed them. More than yous cunts dae!”

The men took mock offence and the women laughed heartily and agreed.

I moaned as she turned back to the task at hand. She started stroking me, and pulling back my foreskin, showed it to the crowd. “Look you dirty fuckers - nae knob cheese! That’s how it’s supposed to be!”

More laughter and mock offence ensued.

In truth I was glad that I had taken the time to wash myself.

She took me in her mouth and proceeded to fellate me expertly to the crowds encouraging cries. I have to tell you that this girl knew what she was doing. Fondling my now accredited legendary baws the whole time she took me completely into her mouth without gagging. Her tongue flicked out and licked me once more - an utterly unexpected and most delightful move I must say.

As I looked around the pub I saw a number of men showing off their own prowess, with a few of the ladies lending a helping hand to get them up to their full size. Nicola couldn’t help smiling from behind the bar, and I noticed that she was more intent on Suzie than myself. My strange almost hallucinatory dream from several months prior came rushing back and I wondered about the truth of it. I must remember to ask later.

The bar was turning into an orgy, soon there were women lying on the tables getting rogered soundly by their men. Some of the clientele leaned on the bar and watched proceedings, masturbating and shouting encouragement.

Nicola went round handing out the beers which were consumed in flagrante. She was also giving tips to the male participants. Use your other hand to play with her breasts like this, or rub her clitoris (yes, thats what that is) with your thumb like this, or spank her butt like this … Always with her hands on the females.

I smiled - there was definitely some truth to my dream.

Suzie was teasing me, taking me close and easing off to let the pressure build, but I had not had any release since Oxford and knew I wasn’t going to last much longer. I could feel my baws start to pulse and my manhood twitch, and so did Suzie. Too late to stop me she started to ask, “Where di yi waant tae…..” but didn’t get any further as I erupted noisily all over her upturned face. Streams of ejaculate ribboned her hair, lips and tongue. Thankfully for her she wore those false eyelashes favoured by Parisian prostitutes to prevent getting an eyeful under just such circumstances. She squeezed me gently and I kept on releasing more and more. It dripped off her chin onto her quite frankly awesome cleavage.

She licked her lips and moaned quietly, “Mmmmmmm, legendary baws awright. Keep cummin’ for me, love.”

Another two shots on to her outstretched tongue left me dripping, which she expertly licked from me.

Her fingers reached down into her more than ample cleavage and stroked my seed on to them. She smiled as she offered her fingers to me to taste myself. I smiled in return and shook my head. She laughed and greedily sucked her fingers seductively with a satisfied moan.

I thanked her with a small bow and buttoned myself up once more.

“I owe you one, for sure my sweet girl,” I said softly. The sparkle in her eye told me that she would make certain it was repaid.

I looked around, but no-one was paying us any attention, consumed as they were with their own lusty releases. I went to the bar and helped myself to one of the line of beers available on the counter. The whole establishment was full of fornicating and voyeuristic parishioners. I had expected there to be a certain amount of jealousy and confrontation, but there seemed to be none. Moreover there was sharing, swapping and patient waiting on their turn in amongst all the sucking, fucking and outright rutting.

I guessed, rightly it turned out, that I had been given access to a very private club. I smiled and shook my head.

Nicola saw me, and with a big gleaming smile on her face came to join me. She helped herself to a beer, downed it in four huge gulps and belched loudly. I couldn’t contain my laughter. She wiped her mouth and joined in, taking another beer.

We clinked glasses and headed away from the rutting to find a vaguely quiet table.

We had a lot of catching up to do.

——-

“So you’re Italian royalty now, ooooooh!” she said, all hoity-toity. I laughed.

“I guess so, although it hasn’t been ratified yet, and most likely never will,” I shrugged, showing her the marriage certificate that I had managed to locate before leaving London.

“Oi! Shush a minute a’body,” she shouted. She pointed at me. “Nae only have yous lot just seen Legendary Martian Fightin’ Baws, but Legendary Italian Royal Crown Jewels!”

Guffaws of laughter filled the club.

———

The news in Paisley wasn’t as bad as elsewhere - Glasgow itself was still over-run by Martians, although the local population had a history of not taking shit from those that would bring chaos to their city. Paisley had seen very little action though the tripods occasionally searched along the docks for boats - I had been unlucky enough to be spotted while one was searching for my friends who had been doing some mine laying along their known routes.

I told her about the devastation caused by the attack in London, and warned her of the possibility of similar happening here unless we somehow managed to take out their supply lines before fully destroying their ground troops. She listened intently as I described a number of the strategies that had been used by the Londoners.

“So, what are your plans?” she asked.

“Nothing concrete as yet, but I feel that we need to take the fight to them if we are to prevent the destruction of the earth.”

“Let me see what I can do - I may know some people …”