I was going through a dark part in my life when I finally decided to try and get myself back on track. I had dropped out of college, and with the money and free time I had, I was spending a large portion of my time getting blackout drunk, high, or fucking anyone who wanted me. I was only nineteen when I had left college, now, as a twenty-year-old man, I couldn't remember the last time I went out for a drink and woke up in my own bed, most of the time I woke up next to some man or woman, other times it was me waking up on a floor, no one in sight. I was a lean, fit guy, short brown hair, blue eyes, but nothing super special to look at, though I was a pretty charismatic guy sometimes.
The thing that finally made me realise I needed to clean up my act, was the morning I woke up still drunk with my skinny jeans around my ankles in an alleyway. Despite the fact I was still plastered, I remember it so vividly, as if it was just hours ago. I remember picking myself up from the ground, it was just starting to become bright out, so I could just barely make out the writing on my leg. "Thanks for the fun. -Tony" I groaned as I stood up, and suddenly became aware of what must have happened. I could feel the pain in my ass, and the drips down my leg as I pulled up my jeans. Whomever Tony was, he had seemingly had his fun and just left me there all night. I remember checking my pockets for my wallet, keys, and phone, and being relieved when I found them on the ground next to where I was laying.
I wiped off my face, and got myself tidied a bit. Checking my reflection in a window before I stepped out into the street, I didn't look too bent out of shape, and decided to try and make my way to a friend's apartment while I waited for the bus back home. That was the other thing, it would be bad to wake up in an alley behind my own building, but I lived out in the countryside, miles away from the city. My phone was dead, predictably, and I just hoped that Nicole hadn't left for work just yet. It was a bit of a plodding walk, but I got there eventually, and Nicole let me up for some tea and a nap.
We sat on her couch after I had cleaned myself up a little more in her sink. We talked for a few minutes, and I remember the look on her face when she told me she was disappointed in me. Nicole never lied, or held anything back, so I knew when she said it that I was doing everything wrong. I remember watching her leave, and just laying down and thinking for a while before I fell asleep again. I kept reflecting on everything I'd done through the last year as I hopped on the bus home, and then as I walked back to my awful little bungalow in the middle of nowhere. I thought of all the women and men I'd slept with, and where. All of the things I'd let them do with no sense of dignity or self-respect. For God's sake, I had a stranger's name written on my thigh.
I opened the squeaky door to my small home, and stumbled my way down to the bathroom to have a shower. I just shook my head, sighing as I took off my clothes, until I noticed some more writing on both my chest and my arm. On my chest was; "Call me. -Kristen" followed by a phone number, and on my arm; "Saeed and Nish were here."
I stepped into the shower, and started scrubbing off the writing as I tried to remember, and pieces of information came back to me. Kristen, she was the first of the night, I remember us fucking in the back seat of her car, and the wink when she wrote her number on my chest. Saeed and Nish were a gay couple from somewhere in the Middle East who ran a local Kebab shop. I remember them a little less clearly, but I know they both fucked me after the shop had closed. But Tony, he was still blank to me, no face, no memory of him.
I felt sorry enough for myself already, and dried myself after my shower. I stomped down the hallway to my living room and turned on the TV before I sat on the couch and plugged in my phone. I just sat there watching some awful reality TV show, just staring, when my phone finally turned back on. I unlocked it, and soon after I had a few notifications. I sorted through them, a few spam emails, a missed phone call from Nicole from last night, and a Snapchat from a guy I'd met weeks ago. I opened it, expecting a dick pic, but it was a video of him fucking some girl from behind. I focused a bit, and recognised the tattoo on the girl's shoulder. It was my ex, Sarah. From the looks of the video, she was getting railed hard too. I didn't really even think, but sure enough, I was soon stroking my cock. I was about 7" long, and decently thick; I'd never had a complaint. It took a few minutes to realise I was jerking off to a guy fucking my ex and stopped. I put away my phone and my cock, and decided I needed to just get some air.
I spent the rest of the day sobering up in my garden on a crappy old lounge chair, before making a sandwich and going to bed. I woke up the next day to a knock at my door, and I threw on a pair of sweatpants and a white tank top before going to the door. I still had a headache when I opened it up, but it was quickly remedied by the sight of the girl at my door. She was a cute girl, mid-twenties at most, with long dyed blonde hair with brown roots, and beautiful hazel eyes. I stared for a moment, and saw her body, clad in tight purple yoga pants, and a matching top. She smiled at me and stuck out her hand for a handshake.
"Hi there! Sorry to bother you, I'm Ellie. I was wondering if you had a minute to talk?" she said, her voice as bubbly and cute as she looked. I was a bit panicked, hoping I hadn't fucked her and gotten her pregnant or something, but I was calmed by the pamphlets in her hand as I waved for her to step inside.
"Uh, hi, Ellie. I'm Sean, nice to meet you." I replied, as we both took a seat on my couch. I gave her a look, as if to apologise for the state of the house, but she just kept smiling.
"Thank you Sean, it's nice to meet you too! First off, let me give you one of these," she said, handing me the pamphlet.
It was well made for sure, a pamphlet for some Church in the area, apparently they were opening their doors to new members. "I'm handing these out around the area, and decided I'd try here too. My Church is looking for new people to join, now, we don't ask much, and are happy to have all comers try it out. It's non-denominational, so any religion welcome," she added, either to assuage my fears, or to ingratiate herself to me. Looking at her, she seemed to be well adjusted, the only religious symbol visible was a tiny silver cross necklace. It made me wonder, she seemed so happy, so bubbly, like I used to be. Maybe it was worth checking out. "Um, Ellie, I'm not too well versed in religion. What is it your Church does?" I asked, needing to know more before I made a commitment.
She smiled, and launched into a speech about their Church, the grounds, how they worship, even the Pastor, who she gushed over for a few minutes. All in all, it seemed too good to be true. It sounded like a place I could get the help I needed, and maybe get my life back together. She brushed some hair behind her ear and smiled at me. "Why don't you come check it out? I have more of these to drop off, but the address is on that, and the Pastor will be there. Father O'Neill is a lovely man. I'll stop by later too, to check if you came!" Her excitement and enthusiasm was infectious, and I readily agreed. I waved to her as she drove off, and went to put on some halfway decent clothes. Unfortunately for me, I didn't exactly have many clothes for Church, so I threw on a nice pair of skinny jeans, trying to make sure they didn't show a bulge or show off my ass too much. I also put on a blue button-up shirt, to at least help the look. When I checked myself in the mirror I looked alright, but my bulge and ass were still easily seen.
I just sighed, and decided it would have to do. I made my way out, walking the half hour to the address on the pamphlet. It looked about as nice as Ellie had described it to me, next to a farm was an old plot of land, which had been somewhat refurbished into a Churchyard. The church itself was an old stone house, though, I couldn't see inside just yet. There was a car in the yard as I walked in, but it wasn't Ellie's. As I approached the building, I spotted another. An old, wooden, garden shed. No windows, padlocked door. I knocked on the door and waited, sitting on the front step as I began to think about what I was doing.
After a minute or two, I heard a door open around the side, and watched as a middle-aged woman in a lovely yellow sundress stepped out of the shed, followed by an older, portly man in a priest's shirt, collar and all. The woman was all smiles, and thanked the man for his help, before walking over to the car in the yard and waving at me. She drove away as the older man, Father O'Neill greeted me. "Hello my son, welcome!" He looked down at the pamphlet and smiled wider. "I don't suppose we have Ellie to thank for getting you here?" He asked, clapping a huge meaty hand on my shoulder. I nodded meekly, intimidated by the man slightly. He was a big guy, at least 6' tall, and pretty husky too, compared to my 5'8", 140lb frame.
"Yes sir, or, Father, I guess. She came by my house and talked me into coming to see the place myself." I looked at him as he guided me on a walk around the grounds. While the front looked good, the back was an absolute mess, more of a junkyard than a churchyard. He told me that the members of the church help out around the grounds to clean it up, but it was a slow process. We sat on an old bench, overlooking the scrapheap around the back of the Church and spoke for a while.
Father O'Neill was as lovely as Ellie described. He acted as more of a therapist as he teased out the reason why I came, and addressed my fears and worries about my lifestyle. "Honestly Father, I don't know many churches who would welcome a Sex Addict and an alcoholic to boot," I said, looking down at the ground ashamed. He just rubbed my back softly and frowned. "Sean, my son, those are vices, and issues to be fixed. I am here to help all of the people of my Church, and, between us, you wouldn't be the first to need help with these things." His tone of voice was so soft and reassuring that I relaxed, practically melting into a hug from him.