In the coffeeshop, I find a table while he orders. Like at the famous chain, here they take your name and call you when your drinks are ready.

A few minutes later, the barista shouts out, 'Cappuccino for Dom! White Americano for ..... slut???'

'Go on, then,' he says.

Blushing, pussy gushing from the exquisite humiliation, I approach the counter and stammer, 'I'm slut.'

Back at the table I lay into him. 'What the fuck?'

His grin fades. 'I thought you'd love it?'

'Yeah, the slut thing was awesome. But you know I can't stand milk in coffee!'