I sat in a soft armchair in the therapist's room. She sat facing me on a more upright chair, a low coffee table was between us. The room was long and thin which exaggerated the distance between us. I was there to talk about my obsessive thoughts. To be more accurate my sex obsession. Right from the beginning, I realised her appearance was not going to help me stop thinking about sex.
She was an attractive brunette possibly in her late forties, but I had a hunch that she was one of those people who just looks exceptional even in their early fifties. Either way, she was attractive and very well proportioned. She had lustrous natural brown shoulder-length hair and wore designer glasses which also looked quite sexy. She was immaculately dressed and clearly took a lot of care over her appearance. She wore a dark navy, wraparound skirt just above knee length with an extra-wide belt and a tightly fitted white blouse. These things might sound mundane but the top button on her blouse was very low down, making it quite open and revealing. Quite a bit of cleavage was on show and with any movement, her thin bra straps came into view. The split on her wrap skirt had a habit of parting over her legs as she crossed or uncrossed them giving a glimpse of stocking tops. Her high heel shoes were quite a bit higher than usual in a workplace. Her belt was wide and cinched tight, accentuating her slim waist.
After a little while of asking her initial formal questions she started to probe more into what my thoughts were and how much they impacted my life. Just thinking about telling her my issues though, was enough to make me feel quite aroused.
"So tell me Paul, how much of your typical day do you spend thinking about sex?"
"Well, Sara it's almost constant. Wherever I go and see people I start imagining things."
Sara crossed her legs and the split in her skirt parted enough to show her knee. She watched my eyes flick down and then back up. She didn't smile, as such, but her eyes seemed to tell a different story. Was it my imagination or did she seem pleased? Was it intentional? "Do you mean you look at those people and imagine them naked?" she asked.
"No Sara, well yes, that's part of it, but it's much more than that. I start thinking about what underwear they are wearing, and how they might look when they are masturbating or having sex. What their preferences might be, what their turn-ons are. That sort of thing." I wondered if I had been a bit too truthful, I generally had a habit of being quite frank with people.
"Do you think like that in every situation you are in?" She asked.
"Well yes," I replied a bit sheepishly. Knowing I probably sounded like a bit of a nut case.
"That's fine Paul, it is not at all uncommon. So did you think these thoughts about me today? Are you feeling aroused right now?...it's ok you can say anything here. Nothing is off-limits and anything you say goes no further."
I hesitated, I knew my answer would be highly personal and I had found from past experience that sometimes my own natural ability to read people could sometimes unsettle even a trained professional.
"Well Sara, yes very much so."
"Tell me in detail Paul about the thoughts going through your head today."
"OK Sara, well seeing as you asked and I guess this is what we are here for, I will. Firstly you are a very attractive lady, but more than that you seem to dress in a very sexy way. I can only presume that you are fully aware that you are giving me regular glimpses of your bra and your legs. I have to also assume that the way you dress gives you sexual pleasure as well."
Sara said nothing but her eyes had that knowing, pleased look to them again. Also, I thought I could discern just the slightest hint of redness appearing around her throat and chest.
"Please go on Paul."
"Well, I guess I am in danger of projecting my own fantasies onto what might actually be a different reality, but I will carry on. In for a penny and all that." She smiled at that and again uncrossed her legs and crossed them the other way. She also ran a hand through her hair even though it didn't seem to need it. Just talking so explicitly to this lady, that I had only just met, had given me a raging hard-on. My trousers had bunched uncomfortably around my crotch. I stretched out each leg in turn and pulled the trouser leg material down, failing miserably to make it seem innocuous and failing to solve the problem.
She looked at me with a subtle knowing smile.
"Paul, it's ok if you need to stand and adjust yourself." She said it like it was the most normal thing in the world. And maybe in her world, it was. I stood up and pinched the fabric on either side of my crotch so that I could also pull my underwear out with it. I decided in the circumstances it would seem silly to turn around to do this so I just got on with it. I also had to push my bulging erection across a bit where it had got slightly caught on the hem of my underpants. Even though I was fully dressed it couldn't really have been any clearer what the size, shape and state of my erection was.
Sara looked on, almost unblinking. Making no effort to look like she wasn't watching the whole operation intently. I sat back down, now more comfortable but more conscious than ever of my throbbing erection begging to be dealt with. I gave up on keeping my legs closed now too, knowing hiding my condition was pointless.
So far therapy for my sex obsession was turning into one of the most arousing moments of my life so far.
"So erm, I forgot what you were asking exactly Sara. Sorry."
"Well, you had just been telling me your thoughts on our meeting so far. You said you found me attractive and then speculated on whether I must enjoy dressing this way. You guessed that I must get my own sexual pleasure from how I dress. As part of my role, I cannot talk about myself, but you are free to speculate all you like. I will only say that I am a human being, so you can, no doubt, make fairly reasonable assumptions about me if you like."
She smiled, sat back and swapped her crossed legs yet again, giving me another eyeful of her slender legs and that hint of stocking tops. She smiled knowingly and nodded to me to continue.
"Well Sara I am an incredibly visual person and you are giving me so many things to see that are causing me to feel extremely aroused." I was really starting to enjoy talking so explicitly and I couldn't help feeling that the therapist was enjoying it too. I carried on
"On top of looking at you Sara I am finding it a massive turn on talking to you about this subject. I can't help feeling that you also enjoy being talked to like this. I obviously can't hide the fact that I now have a raging erection."
Her eyes flicked down to it again
"And I know this might be wrong of me, so stop me if I am out of order, but I find myself imagining that you are also getting turned on."
She smiled and then the crossed legs swapped again.
"As I said Paul you are ok to say whatever you want."
"Well let me take this all back a few stages. I imagine you chose your career because you like hearing people talk about sex and you like helping them. This says to me you think sex is important, which means you enjoy it, probably quite a lot. So right now, under this cover of professional interest, I think you are turned on. I think your pussy is tingling and wet. Every time you cross your legs, the movement lets you give yourself a little secret rub. I can see your chest getting red with arousal. I can see your nipples have become hard and visible in your tight blouse. I think after I am gone you will open your legs and relieve that particular itch. You wear stockings so you can touch yourself there more easily, skin-on-skin. You finger yourself imagining that I am still here to watch you do it. You fantasize about me unzipping my trousers and getting my hard cock out. The erection that you caused. You make yourself cum, knowing I am going to cum just from the sight of you. We make eye contact enjoying the thought that we are both doing something naughty together. Am I close to the truth?"
I wondered if I had gone too far this time.
Sara smiled reassuringly as she swapped her crossed legs yet again.
"Well Paul, as I said I cannot talk about me."
As she said this she licked her lips, in a very obvious way and touched her hair self consciously. Almost as if she said one thing but her body was giving another answer.
"Sorry I forgot the rule. Anyway that's the sort of thing that can go through my brain in an instant."
"And how does that make you feel Paul?"
"Well incredibly horny of course Sara. Right now my erection is incredibly hard and begging to be dealt with. In other circumstances, I would love to free it from its tight prison and be stroking it right now."
"Well Paul, this is a safe space, you can do whatever you need to, with full confidentiality."
I did a double-take at that answer.
"So you're saying you want me to masturbate in front of you?"
"Like I say, Paul, I can't talk about myself but if you feel a need, you have full permission to do what you need to."
Despite her precise choice of words I felt like she was definitely encouraging the idea.
"Wow, despite these slightly arbitrary rules on you stating an opinion I get the feeling that you want me to do something."
Sara smiled and I thought was almost imperceptibly nodding.
"I have to say Sara I am so incredibly turned on right now, and the fact that you say that this is ok and it is so different to anything I have ever experienced that I feel like I really must."