Hey. You. Yes, you with your hand on your pecker, with your pecker in your hand. Let me do that for you. Why? Really? Why not?

See, that’s where you went wrong. You went with the dry rub when what you need is a little sauce. I just use a little spit, like so. See how much better it feels already? Of course, it’s not just the spit, is it? My hand is smaller, softer – surer.

I know your dick better than you do. Uh! Shush! I know you’re too smart to argue. Shh. Close your eyes. Oh, if you keep leaking like that… well, you will, and more. No, I’m not going to put that in my mouth.

You don’t know where my mouth has been.

It’s nice, your pecker. Size matters. It’s not brutishly big. It’s not wimpishly small. I’m letting go. Let me look. Wave it at me. Not with your hand! Did I ask you to touch it? Wave it at me! Ha-ha, twitchie-twitchie! Hello, pecker.

Let’s get back to the business at hand.

Get it?

What do you think about this? Let me spread that little bead all around that mushroom tip, top, tippy-top. Around and around I go and oh there’s more – what a surprise. Did your butt cheeks just clench? I hit a nerve or two or twenty. Don’t hold back. Cum if you want to cum. I’m warning you that when my arm gets tired, I’m walking away, so spill your seed when your seed needs spillin’ - I’m just sayin’.

I think I’ll jerk you faster, now, harder – faster, harder, harder, faster, jerk-jerk-jerk… Oh, you’re clenching again and you’ve sucked your belly in so much that it’s touching your spine. That’s funny, isn’t it? I pull your front bone and you push on your backbone. Jerk-jerk-jerk-jerk.

Your breathing’s getting a little heavy my friend and you’re taking such short breaths. Are we getting close? Harder-faster-faster-harder. My God, how much more blood can you pump into this fucking thing? Pump-pump-pump-faster-harder. And what’s with your hips? Are you fucking my fist? You are, as if that will make any difference. Okay, fine, have it your way. I’ll keep my hand closed around your pecker and you can pretend it’s a cunt.

C’mon! Faster! Harder! Fuck my fist! You’re so close, I can tell. I can tell from the low moan coming deep from your throat and I can tell by your silly grin. I’ll slide while you thrust. Thrust-thrust-thrust. You’re almost there, almost there, almost – ow!

Ohh, I got a cramp in my wrist. That almost never happens. Did you cum? I hadn’t noticed. You didn’t? That’s too bad. You dribbled, though. No moment of bliss? No sudden clarity? Aw, and your silly grin is gone, and you were so close. So. Fucking. Close.

Will you look at those veins throb, just like the ones in your temples. What does it feel like when I trace a vein with my finger? With all those twists and turns, it’s like the river Nile. The Nile. De Nile.

Oh, stop your pouting, jerk-jerk-jerk, you big baby. I won’t leave you hanging – again. Ooh, you’re slicker now. I’ll use both hands, twisting around, up and down your pole. You’ve forgiven me already, I can tell. Twisting up, twisting down, squeezing and jerking, you love my hands.

You like it when my thumb spends time on top, don’t you? Twisting down, twisting up and a little flick drives you wild, huh? Faster-harder. Go ahead, use your hips and I’ll match you, jerk for thrust.

You hump and I’ll squeeze. It’s all up to you now. Harder, faster! Hump-hump-hump! I’m not letting go until you let loose! How fucking typical is it that you want to be in control when you’re getting a hand job from the most beautiful woman who would ever lay a finger on your pecker? We’re in the home stretch – you hump and I’ll stretch. On second thought – jerk, jerk, jerk, faster, harder, jerk, jerk, jerk.

And there’s the calm before the storm. And, and, and…

Wham, bam, thank you, hand!

Wow, you’ve got to be proud of that! I admit that I’m impressed. I mean, you can stop any time now – or not.

It’s really slippery now! Can you even tell that I’m jerking on it again? Ha-ha, I guess you can! I don’t give a rat’s ass how sensitive you are, I want to do this again. I mean, why waste all this lube?

To be fair, you are man enough to cum for me again, aren’t you? Aren’t you? I thought so.

Isn’t that a funny sloppy sound when I’m whopping your floppy? This is taking longer than I want. I’ve got an idea. Lie back. I think that’s better – a hand on your pecker and a finger rubbing your taint. Oh, good, you like that! Do you want to know what else you’d like? I would certainly hate to waste all this slickery slippery cum. Baby, you can clench all you want but you’ve squirted out enough lube to jam a Mack truck up your ass. And, POP! Goes the finger!

That’s not so bad, is it? Not bad at all, in fact, it feels pretty good, huh? Yeah, you like it, with one hand stroking your not-so-floppy and my finger wiggling behind it.

Ten-hut!

It’s almost like my finger is pushing its way into your dick, isn’t it? I wonder if I am ‘cause every time I wiggle my finger, your dick wiggles! See? I have my own penis puppet. You can give me all the dirty looks you want but it feels fucking amazing, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it? Answer me or I walk away right now. What I’m doing for you fucking feels fucking amazing, doesn’t it?

“Yes.”

Stroke-stroke-wiggle-wiggle-faster-harder. I thought so. Sometimes, sometimes I think a man’s nuts just get in the way. I think I’ll just tug on your ball sac a little and tease those bad boys up. Don’t you worry, I would never, ever hurt them – on purpose. My nails are kinda long, so don’t make any sudden moves. See – a little jiggle, a little wiggle and they’re cowering in your belly while I have a handful of scrotum.

My finger fucking your ass probably distracted you from the whole disappearing nut thing. I hoped I’d be able to feel them, you know, from the inside and I’m really trying to, but I don’t think I can – pity.

I just realized we have a dilemma here. I have a finger on your prostate and a fist full of scrotum, and I broke my promise about not leaving you hanging. What’s to be done about that? What’s to be done?

Tug-tug-tug, wiggle-wiggle-wiggle. No, no I don’t want to suck on it. I guess you’ll have to give yourself a hand, which is pretty funny when you think about it ‘cause this is how you got started in the first place.

Tug-tug-wiggle-waggle-jerk-jerk.

Oh, shit, do you realize how hot that is – you jerking yourself off while I have a finger in your pie hole and your whole world in my other hand? Do it faster, baby, faster! Jerk it! I feel it! Yeah, make all the noise that you want – make all the noises! I can tell you’re about to cum, aren’t you – aren't you baby? Your hand is a blur, and, and, and…

And there it is! Good job. I’ll wait.

…

Well, I’m gonna wash my hands and go. Another time? Maybe not. I bet you’ll think about me next time, though.