This is just to say, dear,
I’ve been searching up some porn!
The day is drawn up grey and dim
And I’ve been at it since the morn.
Lord, the smutty images:
The mind, it quite unhinges
And that naughty monster Cupid’s
Left me feeling rather stupid

And the hours, they’ve gone flying
All the while, I’ve been trying
To find some shot, limbs a-tangle
Or bare twat, at just the angle
To say: all this sex put on plain view
Shows how you make me feel about you.