How I wanted to be there for you.
It was all I could do to just hang on waiting.
Never knowing when you’d be around.
Over a month and I wondered.
I’m just not that strong.

Fighting between my heart and mind.
I am a different person now I know what I need.
I thought I could handle it.
Even knowing it would likely all be the same.
I’m just not that strong.

It is deep inside me.
I kept saying to myself let it be.
Over and over let it be.
It came to the surface and exploded.
I’m just not that strong.

A drunken rant but it was the truth.
My guts spilled out onto the page.
Unedited and raw.
Everything I'd kept hidden.
I'm just not that strong

I never wanted you to not live your life.
I only wanted to be a part of it.
Give you something that you needed.
But it became to self destructive for me.
I’m just not that strong.

I can’t do this anymore.
Not because I don’t want to.
Not because I don’t feel it.
Because it hurts too much.
I’m just not that strong.

I worry for you.
How can both your sides be happy?
They conflict against each other so.
There is nothing I can do but let you go.
I’m just not that strong.

I need more than you can give.
You find it an imposition.
An invasion of your privacy.
Promises are never seen.
I’m just not that strong.

I need something real.
Not a fantasy or make believe.
A longing that matches my own.
I thought we had that once.
I’m just not that strong.

I am not what you need.
How I wish that I was.
I need to be tight with you.
You are not wrong.
I’m just not that strong.

I feel like there are two of you.
The sexy little bitch I so desire.
Someone cold and distant I don’t know.
I never know which one I will get.
I’m just not that strong.

There is no right or wrong.
Anguish fills me up.
So I pushed your buttons.
You made the choice I knew you would.
I’m just not that strong.

I feel a sense of relief.
And a deep pang of sadness.
I pushed you away.
I did it on purpose.
I’m just not that strong.

Deep inside there is something that’s yours.
Something you don’t want.
Yet it will not die.
A little spark of love.
I’m just not that strong.

You will never be forgotten to me.
Always in the back of my mind.
Who you really are.
What I wished could be.
I am not that strong.