He said to her:
"A woman who's funny and knows how to grin;
Who'll go out of her way to make my needs fit in
With her life and her wants and her every-day travel;
Who'll match up my odd socks; untangle, unravel
All the mess that I make of my cares and my woes,
And who won't mind massaging my big hairy toes.
A woman who'll match up my socks that are odd,
And not care I'm a geek or a nerd or a spod;
A lady who's kind and polite to my mum
But with filthy mouth, big boobs, and squeezable bum;
A girl who'll blush prettily, and smile through the curtain
Of soft shining hair, all embarassed, uncertain;
But not afraid to take her power in hand,
And be the sexiest woman in all of this land;
A maid who'll pick up all my dirty old pants,
And take all her clothes off as she does a strip dance
And then wiggles her boobies in front of my face
Whilst she fucks me with sexy and confident grace;
A woman who'll suck me until I explode,
And will swallow my cum as I give her my load;
A lass who will send me a text now and then
With a message, a picture, or pick up her pen
And write me a letter that she's thought about
When I'm off on my beer night and being a lout.
A woman who won't ask me, 'What are you thinking?'
When I'm being quiet and enjoying my drinking;
A faithful and fun-loving girl who loves me,
Doesn't mind when I invade her bathtime to pee;
Who will laugh at my farts and then cuddle me close;
Who'll deal well with my man-flu and give me a dose
Of whatever I'm needing, be it meds or joy;
Who will love me for being strong man or weak boy;
To be honest, good friend, what I am looking for
Is a lass who will give me freedom to explore
All the joys that the world has, but lets me come back
When I've had my fill, and my joints start to crack
With the world-weariness when I realise I need
Just a lover and best friend, e'er I fail or succeed.
I'd just like a woman to listen to me,
And to love me no matter what I turn out to be.
A woman who'll walk with me, as I walk with her,
And be faithful and hopeful (and with loins astir).
Is it really too much to expect all of that?
Am I asking a universe of a doormat?
Well, I'd like to be happy and learn to love too,
To be all that she needs and wants, somebody who
Can protect her and love her - and she'll let me do so,
I'll be her companion, her knight; my last Rolo
Will be hers.