You have been slipping in and out
In and out of my dreams, waking and sleeping for months on end
I keep coming back to you, the way the sun shines on you through the windows
My golden man, filling me with tiny tinted crumbs of your life
savory and sweet in my mouth
each one a treasure to taste.

Your kindness climbs through my body, a vine, holding me tightly to earth

It's when you tangle my hair in your fingers, cup my breast in your warm hand, palm up, your thumb slowly stroking the hard nipple down, you taste my skin, pull me away from the drowning
kiss my face, my body softly, and I roll into you, take strength from you, hold onto your shoulders, your hips, feel your golden body enter mine, bright and hard

Our skin is the same pale shade, the sun catches tiny golden hairs on my arms, my thighs, my back. I can be golden too, shining like you do
I don't know if you can see it, see me shine for you

You kiss me goodbye as I wait for my train. I watch you walk away to your car, keys in your hand.
Separation again. Your shoulders are broad, but when you are almost there, one drops down and forward and I know it hurts you.
I feel the tears at the corners of my eyes and look away.

I don't love you, but I do. You are precious in all ways.

I remember you caring for me, pulling me into your body, your hands on me, your arms around me, making our skin one skin, curves explored, your mouth on me, intent with desire when you kiss my eyelids and lick my sweet lips, I ride you then, we fly then.

We are golden and shine.