I phoned Philip and he came to get me without even the tiniest grumble.
When my Mum opened the front door for me and helped me down the step, I noticed that it had begun to snow and on the ground was a very thin layer where it had settled. I looked up into the dark night sky, watching the large white flakes fall gently upon my face, blinking as the odd one touched my eyelashes.
I usually loved the snow, the heavier it fell, the happier I would be but tonight my heart just felt heavy, too heavy to bear and I felt a tear begin to well up again.
“No!” I thought and took a deep breath and began the short hobble to the garden gate which Philip was holding open for me.
The drive home took just a few minutes but it felt so much longer. Neither of us spoke at first. I didn't know what to say and I suppose he didn't either.
The white flakes were mesmerising in the headlights and I stared silently into them just wondering what in the hell I was going to do now. I had effectively told Sam that I had chosen Philip over her, or, at least, that is the way she saw it.
“You are quiet, Anna, is your Mum all right?”
“Huh? Oh... yes, sorry. Yes, she is fine,” I answered him, snapping quickly back to reality. “Sorry, I was just watching the snow flakes.”
He smiled, still watching the road ahead.
“Mmm, yes, they are beautiful. Do you remember our Honeymoon, how hard it snowed the whole week?”
He paused, remembering,
“The Alps were so beautiful, weren't they?”
A lump formed in my throat so big that it prevented me from replying, the memories of that time flooding back and of how happy we were then.
I didn't look at him as he briefly turned his head towards me but nodded my agreement. I couldn't let him see the tears which were once more moistening my eyes.
A few minutes later, Philip turned into the drive then helped me out and into the house. It was warm and cosy.
“Hot chocolate?” he asked.
I shook my head,
“No, thank you,” I said, “I would rather just go straight to bed, if that is all right with you.”
“Yes, I don't mind,” he smiled, “I will come with you.”
He checked that the doors and windows were secure and then he helped me to slowly climb the stairs.
He had already turned back the bed and switched on the electric blanket and he took my crutches from me and helped to sit on the bedside.
I began to unfasten my blouse but he knelt before me and took my hands away, holding them on my lap and gazing into my weary eyes.
I looked back at him, my heart pounding and a raft of conflicting feelings rushing through my head but, above everything else I felt an overwhelming love for him, more powerful than anything I had ever felt before. More powerful even than the feelings I had for Sam and I knew at that moment that he had always been my one true love.
I leaned forwards and our lips met, gently at first and then more passionately. I felt his strong hands squeezing mine and then, suddenly, he released them and began to unbutton my blouse, urgently tugging at each one until the thin fabric separated, revealing my breasts protected by my favourite soft cotton bra.
My nipples stiffened against the jersey fabric and ached for his touch as I pulled my blouse from my waistband and tugged it free, shrugging it from my shoulders.
Without waiting, I reached back and released the hooks, releasing my bra but he massaged my aching breasts with the fabric still in place, his thumbs rolling my erect nipples through the thin covering, a sensation which I found incredibly arousing.
Slowly, my bra slipped away and he leaned forwards and took my teat into his warm mouth, sucking it and my whole breast into his mouth.
The feelings he gave me were indescribable, little shocks surging throughout my entire body.
A few moments later, after teasing both breasts, Philip pushed me gently back onto the bed and began to unfasten the button of my long skirt and lowered the zip. I raised my hips to allow him to pull the garment down over my legs and onto the floor then, with his fingers, pulled my thick tights, with half a leg cut off, very carefully down my body and over my cast with a gentleness that only he could have managed.
I was virtually naked now, save my panties and, to my surprise, Philip lifted my damaged foot and lowered his head until his lips touched the cold plaster cast and placed a loving kiss on my ankle.
“I wish this kiss would take away all the hurt you are feeling,” he whispered without looking up, “Both physically and...”
He didn't finish but returned my foot to the floor.
I watched him intently but still he didn't look up. Instead, he parted my knees and knelt between them once again, his warm hands gently massaging the inside of my thighs, working slowly upwards.
He stopped when he reached the hollows below my groin and lowered his head, thumbs caressing my flesh, to kiss my sex through my panties.
I took a deep breath, the pleasure coursing through me.
“Philip, I... I haven't... washed...” I said slowly, not wanting him to be put off.
“It doesn't matter,” he whispered, “However you smell will be like heaven to me and besides, you are the cleanest person I know!”
I relaxed as much as I could, enjoying the gentle fluttering of his lips upon my mound, his hot breath seeming to get right inside me and I could feel my moisture mingling with his saliva, soaking my gusset.
Heat was gradually replaced with cool air as he removed my sticky underwear, revealing my nakedness, my moisture glistening on my now ultra sensitive Labia.
When he blew gently across them, his cool breath sent a shiver of desire right through me and yet more of my secretions oozed out but before it reached the duvet, Philip ran his hot tongue slowly and deliberately along my groove, from my anus to my clitoris in one slippery slow movement.
I was in Heaven.
And then... he stopped!
I sat up whilst he removed his shirt and looked admiringly at his trim body.
He was older than me, almost fifty and his health was not good but he kept himself in order by eating well and taking what exercise he was able.
I leaned forwards and began to unfasten his belt, feeding the leather through its metal buckle, then released the button holding the waistband.
His zip caught half way down but a little extra tug and it was freed, allowing me to lower his trousers which he stepped out of and kicked to one side.
Very slowly, I reached out and placed the palm of my hand upon the bulge in his brilliant white boxers and felt his erect penis twitch under my touch so I leaned forwards and placed my lips upon it and kissed him.
I wanted him now, wanted him like never before and I slipped my fingers into the elastic and lowered his pants to the floor, his penis jumping up as it was freed from its cotton restraint.
I don't know what possessed me but I did something then that I had never done before. I placed my lips around his straining, shiny glans and took him as far as I could into my mouth.
I could taste his sticky fluid as it oozed from his tiny hole and I let my tongue swirl around, the tip dipping slightly onto that small salty opening.
I began to move my head back and forth and he started moving his hips as if he was making love to my mouth.
Oral sex was not something that had appealed to me before and the thought of having his sperm in my mouth was something I had always found most disagreeable.
Philip had never questioned me or asked me about it but just accepted that it was not for me but, tonight, something was different, I wanted it now, I wanted to taste him and I sucked and licked, swirling my tongue in and out of his hole and then, without warning, his body stiffened and his penis hardened even more and began to twitch.
I was ready for him and sucked hard as his creamy, tangy ejaculation shot into my mouth, spurt after spurt.
Without a second thought I swallowed every last drop until, finally spent, I felt him soften and let out a deep sigh.
His penis slipped from my lips and as he stood before me, I kissed the tip, making it twitch once again. And he stepped nearer so I could put my arms around him and hold him close, his slowly shrinking penis against my cheek.
I felt something touch my shoulder, something warm but wet and then another.
I looked up just as another tear dripped from his eye and landed on my upturned face.
Instantly my heart broke into a thousand pieces.
He stepped back and I released him so he could sit beside me on the bed.
“Did you do that for him?” he whispered, staring down into his lap, not wanting to look at me for fear of seeing the answer on my face.
I was stunned and, for a moment, was lost for words.
“Philip! I... I never... there is no him!” I stammered through a shocked haze.
“Something is wrong, Anna, I know it! I know you like I know me.