Since I could remember, it had been Daddy and I. We were thick as thieves, not letting anyone else into our world. Daddy told me that until I was out of the house and living my own life, his world revolved around me and I was glad for that. It worked anyways. We moved around a lot because of Daddy’s job and we didn’t have time to get to know people and let people in.
When I was younger, it was easier for me to move around. I felt special because of the life that we lived. Daddy was the king who travelled all over and I was his princess. We got to stay in amazing places and I got to meet some amazing people, though I will keep their names private at this time.
However, now I am turning seventeen and things are starting to feel different. I can not completely put my finger on what is wrong, but something is very wrong. Do I feel the need to stay in one place for a long time or is there something more?
“Is everything okay?” My daddy asked as I sat down at the dinner table. “You seem quiet lately, not yourself.”
I pulled a carton of food in my direction and began to make myself a plate. It appeared that we were having chinese food yet again. I was capable of cooking but Daddy never knew when he was going to be home and instead of giving me notice, he just brings food home. That tended to irritate me.
“Andrea Rene,” his voice was low as if I had angered him, but I did not do anything wrong. The tone brought so much confusion into me and I felt nervous. “You tell me what is wrong right this instant.”
“Why?” I asked him, not bringing my eyes up from my plate, I did not want him to see that I was about to cry.
“I didn’t mean to yell baby,” he softened his tone and set down his fork. “I am just worried about you and you won’t help me out here. Tell me something. Tell me anything.”
“I am just tired,” I said quickly, putting down my fork and pressing my plate to the side. “I am going to go to bed.”
I did not give him a chance to stop me. I quickly pushed myself up and made my way quickly to my room. Though it was not really my room, just the room I was staying in this month. I had never had a room that was mine. One that I could decorate and keep all of my things. In fact, I did not really have things. I had a few personal items that I always had, but that was it. Even clothes were bough new wherever we went.
Slipping out of my clothes, I made my way into my current bathroom and started the current shower. I needed to relax a little before going to bed. Though I was sure that I was going to be up all night once again trying to figure things out.
“Andie,” my father knocked on the bathroom door, just as I was getting ready to step in. “Can I talk to you for a moment?”
I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around my body, not even bothering to turn off the water, which was creating a large amount of steam to fog up the bathroom. I swung open the door quickly and looked up at him.
“I just want to take a shower and go to bed,” I yelled at him, the first time I had ever remembered yelling at my father. “Is that so fucking hard to get around here?”
I then slammed the door in my dads face and took off my towel, quickly making my way into the shower. Everything around me was spinning. What was my problem? Why was I treating him this way? Tears soon flooded my eyes and I moved to sit on the shower floor, my head cradled against my knees.
“Andie,” I heard his voice speak again as he made his way into my bathroom, only I was no longer mad. “Have I done something wrong?”
“No,” I got out through my tears. I had no idea why I was doing this. “It is not you daddy. I am sorry I am acting like this. I do not know what is wrong with me.”
“Well if you need to talk I am here,” he assured me, sitting down on the toilet seat outside the shower.
“I just think I am ready for something normal,” I informed him. “I made random friends here and there but I have never had anything real. I am seventeen in a few days for fucks sake and I have never even kissed a guy.”
“Really?” he asked with confusion in his voice, as if this were a shock to him.