Most of the stories I write are sweet, romantic and a representation of real life. Complete with dialogue and feelings. This story is not one of those. This could probably be considered a real life account of a humbling experience.

The wonderful woman in my life, Maddi, has come to enjoy sex in her middle years. Since our divorces we have been making up for lost time. She has gotten adventurous and insatiable. So much so, that we have slowly amassed a staggering amount of toys and sexual paraphernalia. I should probably write articles on the effectiveness of all of them. I feel as though we are becoming experts. Everything from oils and waxes to Hitachis and Sybians. Now don't jump to conclusions, we didn't buy a Sybian, I built one, but that's another story.

Back to Maddi's insatiability. One would think that a desire for sex would slowly wain after four years. One would be wrong. One would also think that the male of the relationship would be constantly thrilled with such a situation...Well, one would also be wrong to assume such things.

To understand the following statements it would be helpful to know I came out of a sixteen year, mostly sexless marriage. I still cannot comprehend the thoughts inside my head. Years without a blow job but in the last few years I have actually caught my self thinking the damnedest things. For example:

Sitting on the couch watching television she opens my robe and slowly sucks my dick during a commercial break. My thought you ask? Seriously, we're watching the Last Ship and you're sucking my dick...again? Now mind you, I'm not the sharpest spoon in the drawer, however I am smart enough to keep my mouth shut and not complain.

Or as we drive home from a late dinner with her parents or mine she proceeds to pull up her skirt and play with her clit as I try to focus on driving. My thoughts? We just had sex before dinner, I'm not Superman . Yet I still am able to keep these thoughts to myself and enjoy the moment.

The truth of the matter is I enjoy sex with Maddi as much as she enjoys it with me. Sometimes though, I feel as if I can't keep up, or rather keep it up.

Hence, the delving into the adult toy store. After a business trip I might bring something new home. On occasion, we go together and pick something fun out. It was on one of these adult store date nights we saw something I didn't even know existed. The a fore mentioned story title, "The Clone A Willy." She wanted one at once. I proceeded to read the package and though intrigued, I was somewhat nervous. The process had all the makings for a science project. A science project with my penis as the main attraction. I have to stick it in what, for how long, while hard? This could be a catastrophe. We left that night without the Clone A Willy, but opted for a new glass dildo (great investment.)

As Christmas rolled around I began my shopping. Amazon to the rescue. Although when buying from Amazon, I would advise a few cautionary steps; No drinking, read the description three times and read it once more before you actually complete the order.

Turns out there are multiple options when purchasing said item. When my package arrived in the mail, it would seem I purchased the "Plaster" model. What on earth would someone want with a plaster penis? Decoration? We have kids...and parents...and the babysitter. Where would one display such a thing?

Not to be defeated I again jumped into Amazon head first and found the correct item. The life like vibrating Clone A Willy. Upon receiving it in the mail I was thrilled. Why? Well, while waiting for the two day shipping I practiced due diligence and researched the process. Using the two most common research tools, Google and YouTube, I discovered that success is not guaranteed. In fact, more often than not, the only guarantee is a mess and some level of shame and embarrassment. So why was I thrilled? Well, because of my errant purchase we now had two chances to get it right. The form used to mold the penis is the same with both products it is only the filling that differs. The pressure is off, mess up the first form, move on to the second.

So Christmas comes. She is thrilled and excited but the urgency to delve into such a process isn't there. So the Willies are placed in the back corner of the top shelf in the least used closet. Time moves on and they are forgotten, left to fend for themselves.

Fast forward six months. Coincidences abound. On the same day I text her a gif of something she truly enjoys (the tip of a penis rubbing back and forth on a clit.) She is on a chair in the closet looking for something and finds the forgotten Willies. The gears in her brain start turning, she has decided, she wants a copy of my penis, and she wants it now!

Far be it from me to deny her, I agree. I immediately renew my research and learn all about doing this thing right. One of the strong suggestions is a cock ring. With all the toys we have in the box, a cock ring isn't one. Problem, the nearest adult store is an hour away, Amazon is two days away and she is a bit impatient.

Fortunately I have a few things in my favor, I'm a problem solver, a bit of a country boy, grew up on a farm and know my way around a hardware store. As some of you know, cock rings are very similar to o-rings. For those that don't know, o-rings are neoprene washers used in various pumps and valves. O-rings come in a multitude of sizes and thicknesses. The upside is they cost between twenty-nine and ninety-nine cents.

Rushing home with my package, I'm excited to show Maddi and once again prove my value as her mate because I posses a level of ingenuity. This did require some additional research into the theory and practice of cock rings. It would appear that one intending on subjecting ones cock to a ring must estimate the size he needs, apply lubricant to the ring, insert ones penis into the ring and then gently convince his testicles to climb through the ring one at a time. So, we got out the coconut oil and proceeded to lube everything up.

My balls didn't know what hit 'em. The first shimmied though without a problem but the second was deathly afraid and crawled up inside my body and would not come out. After gentle coaxing and a firm talking to he agreed to give it a try. More lube and a gentle hand and success, my penis now has a collar.

Looking down, I must admit, I was impressed. Something about the ring caused my entire dick and balls to hang different, like a little lower and out away from my body. It made him look imposing.

So let the science begin. We have read and re-read the instructions and watched various demonstrations on the computer. The process looks pretty simple. My only real complaint is the words used to describe the molding compound. It is repeatedly referred to as the "algae based molding compound." Algae is an ugly word, algae itself is also ugly, I picture a green slimy skin of algae on a pond. Why not organic molding compound, or even molding compound. I have to stick my dick in this. I don't want algae on my dick, but I digress.

It seems easy. Mix up the "algae," with one and three quarter cups of ninety-eight degree water, fill the tube with the "algae" goo, within ninety seconds place ones hardened dick into the tube forcing large (or small) amounts of the molding compound out onto the floor and maintain ones heightened state of arousal for two minutes.

One of the videos we saw used a slightly different method. This couple cut both ends from the tube, placed the empty tube over the hard penis and poured the batter from the top, thus eliminating most of the mess. This seemed like a much better approach. So we're ready. I will mix the warm water with the powder while Maddi sucks my dick. At the ninety-second mark she will commence pouring the tapioca type mixture into the tube as I hold it over my erect cock. Once full, she will recline on the prearranged pillows and proceed to treat her pussy to the pleasant yet firm vibrations of the Hitachi Magic Wand. What could go wrong?

Turns out plenty. The timer is set. The mixing begins. The cock sucking is underway. So far, so good. Ding goes the timer. Hurry, switch positions. I recline with the empty tube on my well sucked cock. She begins to pour the lumpy paste down the tube....but wait, whats this? Nobody mentioned the amount of force necessary needing to be exerted on the tube to keep its contents from leaking out the bottom. Those edges are sharp. The bowl is empty and the head of my dick is still poking out of the top.

Maddi to the rescue. With both hands she begins scooping the goo from around my balls and shoveling back in the top. She feels it begin to set up and jams in the last few chunks. Not missing a beat, she flops to her back, spreads her legs and hits the power switch on the Hitachi. I try to concentrate on the beautiful picture in front of me but am having trouble due to the fact that every time she moves her goo covered hands small bits dry and fall off landing on her clean shaven pussy. In no time at all her lady parts look the inside of a snow globe. This makes me think of my grandmother because she loved snow globes and needless to say, thoughts of gram-gram do a number on my penis and he begins to shrink.

Fortunately, enough time has passed that the mold has set up enough to remove it. Sadly however, the last few chunks shoved in the top did not adhere and fall off leaving a hole in the end of my molded penis. At this point I am battling amusement and sadness over the whole situation while Maddi seems to have lost track of the task at hand and is still enjoying her Hitachi ministrations.

The end result was actually no result at all. After finally prying the magic wand from her hands we conferred and agreed that mixing and pouring in the life like silicone material would be a waste because it would all leak out the bottom. Our anticipated use for the failed mold is to insert a wick, plug the hole on the tip and make a candle.

Overall, it was a great experience. We intend to try again and use the things we've learned for a better outcome. We'll let you know.