Slowly I began to wake up. My thoughts were still cloudy. The taste of alcohol filled my mouth, turning over I saw a few empty bottles on the small table by the bed. The events of the night slowly came back to me. Then I remembered how I had left my boyfriend. Even though I had left him many times before, this time, I was confident that I wouldn't return.
I looked around searching for Damien. There was no sign of him in the bedroom. I got up then went into the bathroom. There was a sticky note stuck to the mirror.
Hello, sorry I left without saying goodbye. I hope that I see you when I get home, I will understand if I don't. I washed your clothes.
Damien
I read it a few times before I took it down. He knew how to make me smile. Immediately after we had left my apartment, he took to me buy a pair of shoes. Then we came back to his house. To say we fucked like rabbits would be an understatement. I had never been with a man that could keep up with my sexual appetite; he did that and more.
While I was taking a shower, I started to think about the things I would say to Johnny. I could wait for Damien to come home then we could both go and get my stuff. Deep down I knew doing that would be cowardly of me. I owed it to him and mostly to myself to go over there myself and talk it out with him.
I walked around Damien's house naked with the water dripping from my body, I felt at home in his home. Damien had left me in his house all by myself. A stranger he had known for less than twenty-four hours.
I found the washing room. My clothes were neatly folded on top of the dryer. Something Johnny would have never done for me. He still had problems working the washer and dryer.
Walking down the stairs I couldn't believe this place belonged to a man. Everything was neat and tidy. All the furniture matched, the carpet was clean. Then I came into the kitchen and my mouth dropped. It was huge there were stainless steel appliances, A center island with kitchen utensils hanging down. It was my dream kitchen.
I knew I would be cooking huge dishes for us. There it was that feeling again, the feeling that caused me to leave my life behind and go with a total stranger. The sex was out of this world. That was not the reason. From the moment I saw Damien. I felt something I never felt before, something that I had been searching for in the arms and between the sheets of many others.
I smiled as I saw another note on the dining table, next to it was some money.
Hi, was going to make you breakfast, but I was running late. Get yourself something. I am having a few friends over to watch the late night game. Don't know why I told you that. You might not be here when I get back. Last night was memorable.
Damien
There was that uncontrollable smile again. I turned the paper over.
You are silly. I love that about you. I will be home
I stopped then looked at that word home. Looking around me, I began to take it all in. I was completely ready to drop everything I had known for the past seven years for this house and for him. I picked up the pen again.
Yes, I did say home. That is if you want me to be here. Then here is where I will be. I might be late, going back to get my belongings.
Claire.
I reread it over, then left it on the table. Underneath the money there was a key, I stared at it before picking it up. I placed it on my necklace. I didn't have anything else to put it on at the moment.
*******************************
When I finally arrived at the apartment, my heart was beating out of my chest. I knocked on the door then waited. I heard the locks turn then the door opened. Johnny stood there looking at me.
"Can I come in?" I asked.
"Of course," Johnny said with a smile.
The place looked the same as how I left it. The beer bottles still on the table, the dishes still in the sink. I shook my head. I didn't know what I was expecting. Maybe I was expecting too much from him. I had fucked another man, on the couch and the floor.
"I am sorry," Johnny said.
I turned sharply looking back at him "What?" I asked shocked.
"I shouldn't have made that bet," he shrugged. "If I didn't..."
I slapped him. "Don't!"
Johnny looked back at me with those eyes. The eyes he always used to get me back. I had fallen for those puppy dog eyes many times before. From the first moment we met in high school I had always felt sorry for him, always coming back because I knew he would need me more than I needed him.
"I fucked him!" I shouted at him. "Right there," I pointed to the floor. "You should be angry. You should be calling me all types of horrid names."
"I can't," Johnny said again shrugging. "I am not mad at you."
"Johnny!" I shouted in aggravation. I sat down on the couch.
"I love you," he said coming over to me.
"No, don't," I said shaking my head.
"But I do," he cried sitting next to me.
"You don't love me, you need me, there is a big difference," I said shaking my head. "If you loved me, you wouldn't let me back in here. You wouldn't have let me fuck another man." I looked at him. "Johnny you would have fought tooth and nail for me to stay."
"Maybe, I liked the thought of you with someone else," Johnny said with a smile. "It turned me on."
"No!" I shouted standing up. "This is not a porn movie or one of those stupid cuckold sex stories. If you are telling the truth which I doubt you are, I am not one of those women that fuck other men just to turn their husbands on."
"That is not true, you have fucked to turn others on," Johnny said.
"Yes, myself," I admitted. "If someone else got turned on because of it, that wasn't my intention."
"Okay, then be with both of us?" Johnny asked
"You don't mean that," I shook my head. "You will be miserable."
Johnny slumped back into the couch. He shook his head. "I don't know what to do."
I shook my head. I knew this was going to happen. I knew he needed someone to hold his hand. I picked up my cell phone. It was still lying on the couch. It must have fallen out of my pockets when Damien took my pants off of me.
"Who are you calling?" Johnny asked.
I shook my head. I never thought I was going to use this number ever again. "Hey," I said when she picked up the phone.
"What are you doing?" she replied.
"You have to come and get your brother," I replied.
Johnny shook his head.
"What?" Jennifer screamed.
"You knew this day was going to come," I said standing firm. "I have had enough. You and Martha caused this problem
"How dare you say our mother's name! You don't deserve to say her name!" Jennifer shouted.
I knew what I had done in the past, and I was not proud of it. My big tits got the attention of many men. Including teachers, police officers. It didn't take them long to realize that I was proud of them and loved to show them to just about anyone. Even shorter time to get on my knees and either suck them off or give them a tit fuck they would never forget.
One of those men was Johnny's father. They had the biggest pool in the neighborhood. One day when all of us were swimming celebrating our graduation from High School. I noticed him staring at them. I had worn the smallest bikini top I could find. My intention was to get the attention of Mark, Johnny's best friend. He never paid me much attention, I would soon find out that he was playing for the other side. Johnny's dad on the other hand.
Johnny's mother caught us in the bathroom. I was on my knees while Johnny's dad was fucking my huge tits. I should have stopped, but I kept edging him on even with his wife yelling at him. I said many things that day I wish I could take back. That incident broke the family apart. Johnny never blamed me, he blamed his father. Jennifer was a different story.
"The two of you spoiled him way before I came into the picture. Now he is your problem, either he stays here by himself, or you can come and get him." I said then hung up.
"Why?" Johnny asked with tears streaming down his face. I had never called his sister. I had told Johnny if I ever called her then it meant I would leave and never come back.
"I'm sorry, she will be here." I shook my head.
For the next two hours, I gathered most of my stuff. The rest I knew Jennifer would throw away. Johnny didn't move from his place on the couch he just sat there.
I knew what was going through his head. He was thinking of things he could say to make me change my mind. Finally, there was a knock on the door. I took a deep breath, then opened it.
"Move," Jennifer said.
"You got here quick," I replied as she pushed past me.
"Not like I had a choice," Jennifer said looking at her brother. "Who did you fuck now?" she said turning to look at me.
"Ask him," I said picking up the two trash bags. "Throw the rest of the stuff away, donate it, burn it. Either way, I don't care." I said as I picked up my car keys.
"Leave it," Jennifer said rolling her eyes.
I put the car keys back down. Jennifer had helped with the down payment for both of the cars, as well as co-signed for them. I began to head to the door.
"I have one question," Jennifer said getting close to me. "When are you going to grow up? You can't be a slut all of your life."
I shook my head. "You don't know anything about me, or what he did to get me to make this decision."
"Go! Just go," Jennifer said shaking her head and pointing to the door. "Never and I mean never see him again," Jennifer said her face looked like many others I had seen before. Judging me for who I am, for what I did. I had seen it too many times.
I nodded then went out of the door. Jennifer slammed it shut behind me. "Bye Johnny," I whispered to myself.
I used the neighbor's phone to call a cab. Hopefully, Damien would be there when I pulled up.
I didn't know the exact address, so I had to direct the poor taxi driver street by street.
It took us longer than expected to find it. I gave him a few cheap thrills by exaggerating the bouncing in the seat anytime we hit a pothole or a bump. When we pulled up my heart jumped because I saw Damien's huge truck parked outside. The cab driver honked his horn. He didn't trust me to leave without paying the tab.
Damien walked out looking angry. Then he smiled as he saw me. The cab driver told him what happened and how much I owed. Damien smiled then paid him, even gave him a large tip. ''
"Sorry," I said with a smile.
"You can make up for it later," Damien said as he gave me a wink. He looked at the bags. "That's it?"
I nodded then told him what happened. I told him everything even what happened with Johnny's father as well as many others. Including a few things, I had kept to myself. Finally, when I was finished I looked up at him,I expected him to call the cab driver back. He looked down at me with those eyes that made me feel small.
"Stay here," he said as he went back into the house. "When you are sure those days are behind you, then you can come in."
I took a seat on Damien's tailgate of his truck. I had things to think about if I was going to live with him. I looked at all the nice houses, the cut lawns, the nicely kept roads. Neighbors were walking their dogs. I even saw a minivan with the perfect family.
Was this the life that I wanted? Could I be that kind of person, the wife that he deserved? What did they say? Once a cheater always a cheater? Did I deserve a man like Damien?
Thoughts began to race through my head, things I had done. People's lives I had changed. I slept with the man inside this house, because of a foolish bet. How could I blame Johnny? I had done much worse without him knowing. I could say I never cheated, but I knew that was a lie. Even before Damien came around I had done some shady stuff. What some would call micro-cheating. I had sent pictures of myself, none of them nude but revealing enough to leave nothing to the imagination. To countless online men. I had a secret life online that I used to get myself off when Johnny hadn't done the job.
I liked my job as an accountant not because I liked accounting but because it took the judging eyes from others off of me. But deep down I hated it. It was boring, it was predictable. I missed the excitement the risk of being caught. I missed being myself. I sighed I knew my answer, and it wasn't good. I looked back at the house. I walked to the door. He opened it with a hopeful look.
I shook my head. "I can't."
"I thought as much. Do you want me to call you a cab to take you somewhere?"
"No, I know what I must do." I gave him the biggest hug I had ever given someone. "Thank you for opening my eyes."
"Thank you for everything," Damien smiled. "When you're ready, you have the keys."
I put my hand on my necklace the key still hung there. "Are you sure?"
He nodded. "I know what I want. When you think you are ready to settle down, you know where to come."
I couldn't believe it. Damien closed the door. I stood there for a few moments just staring at the door. I had just told him that I didn't want him and yet he still trusted me. I smiled as I put my hand on the wooden door, that was my giant. I turned around and began to walk away. A man jogged past me.
"Excuse me?" I asked.
He stopped dead in his tracks looking at me. "How can I help?"
"What street is this?"
He looked at me strangely then told me the name of the road and development. Generally, a person wouldn't give an address away like that, but a busty redhead can usually make guys do what they want. I took a mental note then walked away.
I could say that I was going nowhere, that I had left the two best men in my life. But that would be lying. I know exactly who I am, what I want and where I was going. I like the attention of many men. I like the feeling of being able to do what I want, with who I want. Jennifer called me a slut. So why not embrace that?
*****************************
Weeks passed quickly. I stayed with a friend for the first week. I quit my accounting job but not before giving the boss a blow job he would never forget. I found a job at a local sports bar, the type where the girls dress provocatively to get the attention of male customers. This place had the servers wearing short skirts and tight tops. None of the other girls wore their tops as tight as I did or their skirts as short as me.
"Come here you little minx!" one of the male customers said. The drunk man grabbed me by the waist. His hand slipped down my back then to my ass. He gave it a nice squeeze. I returned the favor by squeezing his hard dick through his pants under the table.
"Now you're not supposed to touch," I said playfully slapping him. It was a show of course. I loved the attention. "Are you guys finishing up or do you want another round?" I asked while squeezing his hard dick, I gave it a slight rub through his jeans.
He looked at me lost for words. He looked over at his friends. "Another round?"
They all roared with laughter, then ordered more drinks. I laughed with them then walked away. "Stupid men," I laughed to myself.
At the end of the night, I had more tips than any of the others. As usual, the other women were mad at me for using my assets. I couldn't help that I was blessed with more than they had, and I used what I had to my advantage.
"Whore," one of the other servers shouted at me as she got in her car.
"Yup and proud of it!" I shouted back.
I didn't sleep with any of the men I flirted or teased. The truth of the matter was I hadn't slept with anyone since Damien. Sure I had a few customers meet me at the back of the bar after hours for a quick blow job, or I let them fuck my tits, but I never fucked them no matter how much they begged.
I got into my car, it was a horrible car that my friend let me borrow until I could afford my own. As usual, I drove the long way back to the apartment.
I stopped short of Damien's house. His truck sat in the driveway. All the lights inside the house were off. I imagined him sleeping with his massive arms and huge dick going to waste in that large bed. I sat in my car thumbing the key that still hung around my neck.
There were times I made it up to the door, ready to put the key in the door and turn, just before I would put it in I would turn and walk away. Tonight was no different. I got out of my car, walked past the truck running my fingers across it. The security light turned on. I looked up and waved at the video camera as it stared down at me. I stepped in front of it and smiled. I don't know what he thought of when or if he looked at it. I took the key from around my neck. This time, I would do it I thought to myself, I pushed the key into the hole.
"Turn it, you stupid bitch," I whispered.
Click
The door opened. I took a deep breath then entered. The house was cold. The air was still and there was no sound. I slowly walked through the living room, trying to be as quiet as possible. I reached the stairs, I looked upstairs, knowing his room was just to the right, I could walk up there and be with him. I shook my head. I wasn't ready for that, not yet. I walked into the kitchen.
I ran my hands over the countertops. I stood and stared at the stainless steel appliances. Then something caught my eye. It was a note sitting on the table. I walked over to it.
Hi there, if you are reading this then you finally made it inside. If you are hungry, there will always be leftovers in the microwave. I hate the car you are driving it makes a horrid sound as you drive away. Take my truck. I bought another one for myself it is in the garage. Trust me I won't report it stolen. I will take care of everything.
Damien
I started crying. I put my hand over my mouth to stop the noises. I turned and looked inside the microwave. I took out a large plate of home cooked food. Meatloaf, potatoes and green beans. I hadn't eaten a good meal except for fast food and whatever I could take home from the bar. I sat down and ate; it was delicious even though it was cold. I dared not heat it up in case he came down. I couldn't face him right now. I read the note over and over. Looking down at the key he had left me.
I knew him well enough to know he would be mad if I didn't take it. I picked it up then placed the old keys down on the table. Slowly I walked back out, locking the door behind me. Gently I opened the truck door.
I marveled at the inside, leather interior, and all the other things you would expect from a nice truck. I started it up and began to back out of the driveway when I saw Damien. He was staring down at me from his window. I waved up at him, and he waved back. I pulled out of the driveway.
****************************
"Why don't you just go to him?" my roommate said, she was getting ready to go to work. "You have been over his house every night for the past month."
I nodded. It had been just over a month since Damien gave me the truck. He had even changed it over to my name. I had received the notice as well as all the documents in the mail, meaning he knew where I was.
"You know why I can't," I replied.
"I think he knows you like to be with other guys. And I don't believe he cares," she said.
I nodded. I still hadn't slept with anyone. I had left the bar because of complications. A married woman came in claiming that her husband had slept with one of the servers. Of course, everyone that worked there blamed me. Even though I hadn't slept with him, or anyone that they had accused me of sleeping wih. I may have fooled around with some of them. Needless to say, it was time to move on.
Now I worked in a strip club. I was making more money, and there was no chance of an angry wife coming into complain about their cheating husband.