This part is true.

I have been fantasising about a cuckold lifestyle for half our married life, something my wife is totally unaware of. She knows I am into looking at porn on the internet 'occasionally' and I have also bought some films for us to watch but she has never shown any real interest even in ones with women taking and enjoying big cocks and so I had never pressed forward with showing her cuckold content.

The fact that she doesn’t show such interest is odd when you consider that when we met on a holiday, I was a virgin even though I am several years older than her and she had lost her virginity to a black guy with a large cock. She also had at least one, likely more lovers, perhaps even during our early long-distance relationship after returning from the holiday abroad.

I have tried to get her to open up about past lovers and she has said that she thinks that she did orgasm once with her black boyfriend but then clams up. I have tried to promote such thoughts and talk by buying vibrators and dildos larger than my average cock plus penis sleeves, extensions and even a black hollow strap-on but she rarely takes them fully and complains that they hurt or just feel wrong.

One small success was a pair of black latex penis pants. Although they didn’t add any real size the sight of a black cock entering her was a turn-on, well at least for me and she never complained...

It’s difficult though to maintain an erection inside a thick sleeve when your partner is not fully into it, so the potential of these sex aids has never been realised which saddens me as during over 30 years together my wife has never orgasmed! I have tried stimulating her with my fingers including during making love and orally but she has never got off. I have encouraged her to play with herself and her toys but she shows no interest claiming she enjoys our sex together and isn’t bothered about not reaching orgasm. She is still the only woman I have cum inside.

Now, some readers may be thinking that she is cold and frigid in bed but far from it, she would happily have sex every night and is quite vocal. She will suck my cock occasionally though rarely lets me cum in her mouth purely because she loves me cumming in her pussy and so sees this only as foreplay. However, on the occasion she does let me cum in her mouth, she will swallow or if I ask her to, share it with me in a sloppy cum kiss. Again, very occasionally she will give me a handjob or let me wank off, cumming either in her mouth, over her tits, pussy or over myself. She always gets very wet during foreplay and fucking, which I love.

We have role-played with her dressing up as a nurse or, my favourite as a schoolgirl with regulation navy knickers, long white socks etc.

We have also tried some mild bondage and the use of blindfolds but she always assumes the submissive role and I would love her to be more assertive and take me in hand, even using some of the sex aids I have bought on me.

She likes to sniff her panties after sex which I do also though I get off even more by taking them out of the laundry basket and wearing or wrapping them around my cock as I wank off in private. 

When we are having any kind of sex, even during foreplay she will talk dirty to me telling me how hard and big my (average) cock is and all the time I’m imagining it’s another guy fucking her with me watching or just listening. Though I do sometimes respond by telling her that I want her to make me lick her clean, she rarely mentions it at the end and once I have cum I lose all urge to go down on her. 

This is a pity as the times she does ask me to and spreads her legs for me to go down on her or when I overcome my loss of mojo and dive in myself I really enjoy the aroma and taste of her cum filled panties, pulling them aside and eating her creampie and I also love eating my cum from her tits, face, thighs or lips. I much prefer the taste of her cum filled pussy than when I go down on her during foreplay.

Sometimes she will lick me clean after sex and this can regain my sex drive enough for me to spin her round with her over me in a 69 to lick her cummy pussy out.

I have found that the best way for me to enjoy licking her clean is to slip down the sheets early in the morning following a love-making session the night before, preferably before she decides to go to the loo. I of course imagine that it’s another guy's load in her and that she has come home from a night out with the girls after hours of passion with a lover and slipped into bed as I slept.

However, this never lasts long enough for me; I would love for her to take charge, grab hold of my head, straddle my face, open up her pussy lips and dribble cum in my mouth and then ride my tongue like a little cock whilst telling me to lick clean her messy pussy as I wank my sticky limp cock back to life. This morning-after clean-up nearly always ends up with me taking sloppy seconds which she knows I enjoy, playing with the cum and pussy juices running between her thighs and down between her ass cheeks as my cock slops about in her, my balls getting coated with the leaking cum. Unlike some women, she has no problem with me waking her up in the early hours for a fuck.

She likes me to squeeze her nipples as do I and we will occasionally spank and lightly flog each other as we make love. Cock rings also come into play both around the base of my cock and ball sack. I like her to fondle my balls and squeeze them when I’m about to cum and lately have been getting her to suck them as part of foreplay.

This gave me the opportunity to suggest that I should shave so that sucking them would be more pleasurable for her.

In reality, it was more selfish motives that brought me to suggest this as for one, cock rings are much easier to take off with no hairs in the way as our cock cages and also panties look better on.

Initially, I fully shaved down there but she just laughed at this and so now I’m limited to shaving my cock and balls only and merely trimming the rest. I’m also banned from shaving my torso as she likes the feel of my hairy chest.

My wife knows that I like to wear her panties though I tend to limit tightly these occasions since I get the feeling that she tolerates this rather than enjoys it and hardly if ever initiates it by leaving some out for me to wear which is a shame. That said, she does sometimes slip a pair into my luggage when I go away on business trips, largely in the hope I will send her a picture message of my cock in them with a suitable note to say how I’m missing her and want to fuck her when I get home. Of course, I oblige.

We both enjoy this though she never reciprocates by sending me sexy pictures.

Occasionally when I’m away for a long while we have phone sex and very occasionally she urges me to cum.

Every Christmas we buy each other something special for Christmas night. I buy her sex toys, sexy lingerie or a nighty and she generally buys me boxer shorts which are hardly sexy. However, this year she bought me some women’s knickers thinking it would be funny but I was absolutely delighted and wore them to bed that night. She was wearing her new nightie and had panties that matched mine. My cock was hard all night even after taking sloppy seconds. The next day, I even looked at women’s panties in the online sales with her by my side so this part of my fantasies is becoming real though I’m still not sure how seriously she is taking it or how far I can push it. 

What she doesn’t know about is that I also have a collection of my own panties that I wear when I’m away. They are smaller and skimpier than hers, as I find that they hold me in better since I wear them not just in the bedroom.

She also does not know my four cock cages which I also wear out to restaurants under my panties at night.

Of course, I take pictures in my panties and other lingerie to post and share online or via Skype. I particularly like taking risky photos in public places in hotels and outdoors. I’m always extremely careful but the risk is always there which is what heightens my sexual pleasure even when it may be very cold and tricky to maintain an erection.

Whilst away, I can edge my cock for several hours at a stretch and if I do allow myself to cum, then I eat it from my hand, panties or shoot it straight into my mouth. Just leaking precum for hours, turning it into a white frothy lube and then experiencing a ruined orgasm where the cum just leaks out in a gentle continuous stream without my cock even twitching is an amazing feeling. Sometimes I am rock hard when this happens, but other times my cock can be completely limp.

I have a couple of fake pussies which I enjoy whilst away, my wife knows about one of these as I bought it with a Tracy’s Dog clitoral stimulator for her. Again, disappointingly, we have only played together a couple of times with these and so I’m left to pleasure myself in the main with such toys.

I have also tried fucking various fruit as well as cumming in a condom, blowing it up like a balloon and then biting the tip to get the cum to squirt over my face and into my mouth. Jerking off with my legs over my head and cumming into my mouth is also something I enjoy and would love to share. Of course, this is coupled with a cuckold fantasy of being a submissive hubby and sissy taking her lover's load straight from the source.

I have many cuckold scenarios that I enjoy fantasising about, some of which I desperately want to experience and others which I’m not sure I would in reality.

In the main, they fall along the classic cuck hubby scenes of:

Finding out my wife is cheating on me and secretly enjoying the evidence (pictures, video, cummy panties etc...) to listening to or watching her fucking another guy to a group of guys as we both enjoy the best sex of our lives in very different ways.

I never get to join in as an equal; I mostly get to service and then reclaim her in some way when they have finished. I would likely be wearing lingerie and perhaps a cock cage to advertise my submissive role. I would absolutely love to watch her orgasm on another guy's cock and even better if she can also get to the stage of cumming on my face as I perform clean-up duties. I want to hear her tell me how much bigger and better they are at fucking her, but in the main, I want the guy(s) to respect the fact that we as a couple are giving her up for the night or weekend etc... and that this experience is reinforcing our marriage, albeit changing both our sex lives.

Of course, being a submissive leads into some bisexual scenarios with me licking clean not only my wife but her lover and likely moving on to fluffing and sucking him off; I would love to experience a guy cumming in my mouth but it would have to be with one or both our wives present and encouraging (humiliating) me.

I do also sometimes get off imagining being fucked by a guy as she watches but I have no real wish to be sucked off or fuck another guy although being in a 69 with a guy (another cuckold?) while both our wives watch and also perform for us would be interesting.

I also find scenarios where we are in a wife swap situation but his wife and I just watch very arousing.

As my wife rejects the thought of cheating in marriage then unfortunately none of this is likely ever to be realised... 

Perhaps I could find another couple to play cuckie with where he isn’t into giving oral or being dominated/humiliated or exposing his feminine side but she wants to experience being a femdom and they have an exhibitionist kink?

She had no idea about the cuckold fantasy blogs I had on various sites until...

To be continued…