I decided to go to this little place I have never been. There was really nothing particularly interesting about it but the sign said “Longest bar in town!” Hmm …Is that really a selling point? I walked through the squeaky saloon style double doors and took a seat at the bar. The place was completely empty except for the ruff looking bartender and there were only two bottles on the shelf, whisky and vodka.
“What can I get you?” He growled?
“I guess a whisky?”
He rinsed out a dirty shot glass and gave me a double. “Thanks!” I lifted my glass and toasted him; he said nothing and went back to the book he was reading.
This décor in this place was atrocious, and the bartender was surly, I will defiantly not be coming back here. After sitting in uncomfortable silence for a little while I said, “So… The longest bar in town huh?”
Without looking up from his book he said in a prerecorded way, “It is the longest bar in town, there was a long bar contest ten years ago and ours is an eighth of an inch longer than any other in town… hence the sign.”
“Oh”… I decided sitting in silence is a much better option than attempting forced conversation with this guy. I tried to hurry with my drink but it was just so bad, hurrying is something this beverage would not allow.
After the first drink was gone my mouth was numb so the next three went down a little easier, I noticed the sun peeking through the dilapidated old wooden slats that made up the outside wall, as it beamed in the light shimmered and danced when it hit my glass.
Ah …the shiny hue is once again returning to the world I thought to myself, I spun my glass and it made beautiful circular rainbows on the bar-top.
After a painfully long time, which in this place wasn’t very long, a girl wandered in, she sat down one barstool away from me as to kindly not invade my personal space. She looked at the wide variety of drinks available and said, “I’ll take a shot of vodka.”
The bartender without a word rinsed out another shot glass, poured her a drink and went back to his book. We all sat there in silence for a little while and she eventually said… “So, longest bar in town huh?”
The bartender again without looking up said, “It is the longest bar in town, there was a long bar contest ten years ago and ours is an eighth of an inch longer than any other in town… hence the sign.”
“Oh,” she said and we return to the silence. She eventfully looked over to me and said in a sarcastic tone, “So do you come here often?”
In an equally sarcastic way I said, “Oh yeah, I had my akinsanya party here.”
She laughed extended her arm and said, “My name is Mary.” I gently kissed her hand and said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you Mary,” We sat in silence for a little longer.
“So what do you do?” She asked.
The air was thick with boredom so I continued the flow of jokes, “I am a millionaire superhero firefighter rock star.”
“Oooo … a fancy renascence man huh?” She said as she scooted one chair closer.
“What do you do?” I asked?
“I am an intergalactic planet manufacturer specializing in the inhabitable zone.”
“Oooo… freelance …Or do you work for a company?” She giggled and looked down at her drink.
For the sake of brevity I will spare you the details of the next half hour filled with witty banter and sexual tension. Eventually with a lull in the conversation she looked me up and down and said, “You have a beautiful nose.”
“Do I?”... I asked as I rarely consider my nose at all.
“Yes… may I touch it?” She asked shyly.
“My nose?”
“Yes.”
“Ok?”
She swiveled her chair my way, and started feeling my nose with both hands. “This is weird,” I said in a funny nasally way as she closed her eyes and pinched it.
She was enjoying this a little bit too much and when she slid her pinkie finger in my nostril I pulled back and said, “OK, that’s enough… you creep.” She smiled and we looked in each other’s eyes for a moment, she was wearing a cute slinky yellow sun dress and apparently no bra as her nipples were visibly hard through her dress.
She leaned closer, ran her hand up my thigh and said, “do you live around here?”
“Yeah… just up the street,” I said trying not to look surprised.
She slipped her hand down the front of my pants and slowly gave my cock a few squeezes, it took my breath away and I couldn’t help but look surprised this time. I looked over at the bartender and he was still motionless reading his book.
“Can we go hang out at your place for a little while?” She asked as she was expertly handling my manhood.
“Sure” I said in a voice much higher than I intended.
“Great! Let’s finish these drinks and get out of here.”
I grabbed my terrible whisky slammed it down and said, “OK I’m ready.” She laughed and slowly reached for her drink, she took a tiny little sip and said “OK let me finish mine,” she gripped me tighter and gently tugged. We sat in silence for a moment while she was secretly pleasuring me under the bar, I seized this silent moment and rested my hand on her bare knee, I slowly started running my hand up her thigh and she forcefully yelled at the bartender, “HEY! Can I buy my friend here another drink?”
He slammed his book down and started heading over. With every step he took my hand slid a little higher, and once I reached my destination I realized something surprising a wonderful about Mary, she was not a fan of wearing panties, and she was sopping wet under the thin vale of her light sun dress. she let out a pleased sigh as my fingers slowly yet gingerly explored every one of her delicate folds, the bartender poured me another; luckily he couldn’t see what we are up to on this side of the bar.
She started pumping faster, and with a twinkle in her eyes she turned back to me and asked … “Sooo, how was your day?” She took another tiny sip of her drink and I took a sip of mine, I slowly slid two fingers into her while using my thumb to make little circles.
“It was ok, work was busy, but it’s getting much better as the day goes on,” I smiled.
“Well that’s good.”
With a little practice I started to get pretty good at maintaining my composure and nonchalantly keeping up my end of the conversation while constantly being on the verge of orgasm. Mary also seemed to be an expert at this game, although sometimes when I touched her just right she would pause or shutter a little bit in the middle of a word. After quite a while I eventually felt worm waves wash over me and feared I couldn’t hold it in any longer.
I leaned over and whispered into her ear, “Mary, If we don’t leave soon I’m going to have to knock out the bartender and steal his pants.” She gave a few extra tugs and just as I was about to explode she slipped her hand out.
I tossed a twenty on the bar and Mary yelled to the bartender, “Alright! You’re safe for now but next time I’m going to let him knock you out and steal your pants,” he slowly gave us the finger as he didn’t look up from his book.
On the way to my house we walked close and held hands. “Wow… I almost lost it back there at the bar.”
“Oh would that have really been the worst thing to that happened to you today?” She playfully replied.
“Well no, but it would have been embarrassing to have to walk home with wet pants.”
“Oh don’t be such a prude,” she spun around and came in for a kiss, but she didn’t kiss me; she once again grabbed my cock, gripped tightly and gave a few more tugs through my pants.
“No Mary! no.. no……. nooo.” But it was too late; I could feel an orgasm washing over me.
I shook and sputtered as she was pumped everything out of me, then she gave me a gentle kiss on the nose.
“There ya go,” she gave me a few pats and it smeared everything around.
“Awww, why? …. I have to walk around like this?”
She laughed took my hand and said, “I just wanted to see how cute you look when you orgasm.”
“You couldn’t have waited?”
“Nope.”
“You are a creep,” I said as I put my arm around her and pulled her close.
When we got to my house she followed me into the bedroom to watch as I changed my pants. We made our way back to the living room and I lit a fire in the fireplace while she opened a bottle of wine, we sat on the soft carpet by the fire talking and getting to know one another.
The hours quickly passed and I started to get a bit peckish, I asked Mary if she was hungry and she seemed indifferent but I was going need to eat something before the marathon sex started, so I went into the kitchen to make a quick omelet.
As I was innocently peeling a carrot she slinked up and hugged me from behind, she asked what I was doing as she slowly slipped her hand down my pants.
“I’m peeling this carrot to put in an omelet.”
She took off my pants as she slithered down my waist, “Carrots in an omelet?”
“Yeah, you should try it, it’s crunchy.” I just kept cooking as she started going down on me.
After just a few minutes when I was fully hard she popped up between me and the sink, my cock slipped under her short yellow sun dress and nestled between her legs.
“Can I help you cook?” She took the second peeler from the sink strainer.
“This is actually pretty helpful,” I whispered and kissed her ear, she started peeling a carrot and gently swaying her hips.
“We should put some tomatoes in there,” I reached over to the fruit bowl and handed her a tomato. Mary leaned over to get the cutting board from the strainer and knocked over the matching salt and pepper shakers from the windowsill over the sink; they both bounced off of the counter and fell on the floor.
“Oh these are cute,” She said as she bent over to pick them up, “there little kitties.”
“Yeah there Siamese cats, I got them from a gift shop on vacation last year.”
“I really like them,” she slid them back onto the window sill.
“Hey look what I have!” She reached down in front of her and wrapped her hand around the head of my cock that was poking out from between her legs; she gently tugged to pull me through as much as possible. “Look I’m, a real boy,” she was giggling and pointing my cock around making pew, pew, noises like it was a gun.
“Ha! That’s not what we do with them,” I laughed.
She giggled and set up a cutting board in front of the sink. She started slicing tomatoes as I washed a plate, I dried the plate and set it on the counter next to the stove as she was gently swaying her hips, “I have to go get the eggs and cheese from the fridge,” I said as I gently rubbed her nipples over her soft sundress.
“Aww, don’t go anywhere,” She reached down and slowly rubbed the head of my cock on her clit, “I’ll just come with she giggled.” She got a good grip on my cock between her legs from the front and started heading to the fridge pulling me with her, we were both giggling as we in perfect sync shuffled over to the fridge.
She opened the fridge door and bent over to reach the eggs from the bottom shelf, I ran my hands up her thighs to her hips and she let out a sigh as I slowly sunk deep into her. I gently pulled out, then back in; she gave a little moan as I thrust in and out a few times. I closed my eyes and said, “I should probably run to the bedroom and grab some protection.”
With her head still in the refrigerator she said, “Oh don’t worry about that, I’m already protected.” My cock still deep inside her as she slowly stood up, I kissed her ear and slipped my hands under the shoulder straps of her sundress to gently massage her breasts. Our bodies fit together so perfectly that when we stood flat on our feet I almost filled her completely.
She squealed in delight as we shuffled back to the stove still connected, I slid in and out a little with every tiny step; she was carrying the dozen eggs and a brick of cheese while I was still holding her breasts under her dress.
When we got back we both stared out the window above the sink for a moment and I slowly slid in and out as we watched the neighbors walking by, Mary smiled and waved to them, they waved back. She leaned her head back onto my shoulder and said, “I wish we could be connected like this all the time.”
“Me too, I kissed her ear again.”
“I have to wash this pan for the omelet,” I slid my hands out from under her dress and grabbed a pan. She let out a happy little moan as I slid deep into her when I reached to turn on the faucet, I started washing a pan and she was cubing the cheese on the cutting board, I was gently sliding in and out as she swayed her hips.
For a while our bodies didn’t move much, we stayed still while connected at the waist and just enjoyed the comfort of holding each other from the inside while our hands were busy making diner. When one of us felt the need for a little friction we would take turns gently moving our hips, I would sometimes give a few slow little thrusts, and when Mary needed it, she would gently bounce up and down on my cock for a little bit.
I did the little thrusts and washed the pan while she continued cutting cheese, then she took a turn gently bouncing while she dried the pan and I washed the cutting board, she took the pan and still connected we shuffled over to the stove to cook the eggs.
She would rhythmically stand on her toes a little bit, then slowly slide back down onto me as we both cracked eggs into the pan and her breath was starting to get quick and short. She turned on the stove, and without braking the rhythm we shuffled over to the sink to fill the coffeemaker, our hips stayed still just enjoying the inside hug while I filled it with water and she put grounds in the little basket.
Again she squeaked as I went deep into her when I reached to turn off the water, we shuffled back to the stove and our hips were slowly dancing as I put the vegetables in the pan. We stayed still and I gently massaged her breasts while we waited for the eggs to cook. She turned the flame to low and took a turn slowly bouncing while I stirred the food.
I could feel the beginning of an orgasm flowing over me so I handed her the spatula, then I gave her a hundred tiny kisses down her body and went down on her while she cooked. Mary gave a happy little shutter as I did some tiny little circles around her clit, then just for fun I sunk my tongue deep into her. She reached for two cups and screamed in glee as my tongue wriggled around deep inside her tiny body as she was pouring us some coffee.
Mary patted my head and said, “Stay right here.” She took the cups of coffee over to the table and when she returned she leaned against the stove, arched her back and stuck her butt out to silently invite me to go down on her with a better angle from the back.
My face was buried deep between her slippery thighs and my tongue strained to reach as I did little circles around her clit again. She let out a content sigh as she cooked, “Do you want some toast?” She asked in a gentle moan, I kissed my way up her back and whispered in her ear, “sure the bread is in the cabinet above the stove,” She stood on her tippy toes to reach it and when she came back down she slowly sunk back into my cock.
She was bobbing up and down on me with increasing speed while putting the bread in the toaster. She paused to close and twist tie the bag and I took a turn thrusting with increasing speed, when she stood on her toes to put the bread back in the cabinet I slipped out of her for a second until she came back down and landed perfectly on my cock. Her body just sucked me back in, she leaned back, rested her head on my shoulder and whispered in my ear, “See my body just wants you to stay inside.” We both giggled.
When the toast popped up I was gently rubbing her nipples and quickly thrusting in and out, she was happily squeaking with every stroke as she buttered the toast. I slowed down and came to a stop so I could reach around and grab the spatula to scoop the eggs from the pan to the plate. “Mary this is the most fun I have ever had cooking dinner or having sex,” I said as I returned my hands to her breasts.
“Oh you don’t normally do it like this?” She cut the toast and arranged the triangles on the plate. “Having an orgasm while I’m getting things done is my favorite.”
“Well it’s my new favorite too, it’s super fun and with four hands we are so efficient.”
She smiled kissed me on the cheek and said “Well in the future, whenever we have some things to do let’s do them with more orgasms.”
I laughed and said, “That sounds like the best plan,” She took the pan and spatula and we shuffled back to the sink. She leaned her head back on my shoulder and said, “I’ll take care of the dishes if you take care of the orgasms.”
“Ok that sounds like a pretty good deal.”
I started going faster and harder as she turned on the water, she was happily getting pushed into the counter with every thrust while she scrubbed the spatula with the green scrubby pad. She started moaning and squealing every time my cock hit its deepest point inside of her as she rinsed off the spatula.
She grabbed the pan and started scrubbing it with the green scratchy sponge; she spread her legs and stuck her butt out farther to happily except the pounding she was getting, she started getting really loud and letting out little happy screams with every thrust while still efficiently scrubbing the pan.
I started to feel a warm wave come over me and was about to cum, and by her cute tittle ecstasy screams it was clear Mary was also on the verge as she continued to scrub. I reached up and went back to gently rubbing her nipples, without any break in the cleaning she shook and shuttered and let out some loud moans as a rolling orgasm washed over her, with blissfully shaky hands she rinsed the pan.
I grabbed the towel and dried the pan as my knees went week and the waves of orgasm hit me. We stayed motionless for just a second while we held each other and looked out the window.
After our legs started working again, still connected we shuffled back to the stove, Mary grabbed the plate and two forks then we shuffled over to the table, I sat down in a chair and she sat on my lap but she spun around so we were facing each other. We sat there connected while we ate dinner and soaked in each other’s warmth.
“I don’t think I like carrots in my omelet,” she said while picking them out with a fork.
“Yea, it is kind of an acquired taste, I usually cut try to them a little thinner so they can cook with the eggs.”
After dinner I slipped out of her as she crawled out of my lap, our combined juices flowed out and covered my stomach we both giggled and she smeared it around my chest. I took the plate over to the sink and said, “I don’t think I have enough orgasms left to wash these dishes, let’s just leave them in the sink.”
Mary came up from behind hugged me tight and said, “Well we will just have to come back to it later, let’s just go relax by the fire.” We opened another bottle of wine, stripped naked and sat in front of the fire on the soft warm carpet just talking for hours.
After many glasses of wine Mary put her hand on my knee, looked deep into my eyes and asked if I might want to go on an adventure with her. “Mary,” I looked back into her eyes and said, “Even though I have only known you for a few hours I can already tell I would follow you to the ends of the earth.”
She smiled shyly and asked in a serious tone, “do you promise?”
“Yes, I really mean it; I think your great and I truly would do anything to spend as much time with you as possible.”
Her face got very serious as she scooted a little closer, she gently whispered in my ear, “Can you keep a secret?”
It’s been my experience when a beautiful lady asks you if you can keep a secret always say yes.
“Yes I can keep a secret, you could tell me anything and at this point, I doubt anything you say could get me like you any less.”
“Great!” She smiled and poured another glass of wine, then unceremoniously launched into this wild story.
“So …I am from very far away, and I’m part of a project to seed interplanetary objects inside the inhabitable zones of the five dimensions we are nearest too, I have been genetically produced for one purpose, to harvest the fertilized eggs of many creatures throughout many universes timelines and dimensions.”
“Right now our job is to gather ten thousand fertilized eggs from your species, so we can start the seeding process in the inhabitable zone of a neighboring dimension, and If we start this process with a creature as hearty as your species we will have already bypassed millions of years of evolution.”
I was confused and unsure if Mary was joking or if she was crazy, those were really the only two options I entertained, but instead of saying something I just squinted my eyes and tilted my head to the side like a confused puppy, I was desperately hoping the punch line was coming soon.
“Imagine where you and your galaxy would be right now if you didn’t have to spend millions of years to evolve to the point you are at now,” She put her hand on my leg and looked deep into my eyes ,again to make sure I was really paying attention.
“You see …we are all traveling in a wave, this wave is comprised of multi-dimensional pockets, inside each one of these pockets is a universe, inside the universe, is a galaxy, inside the galaxy is a solar system, inside the solar system there is an inhabitable zone, in these zones there are planets, on these planets there are continents, on the continents, there is life….You.”
“These dimensional pockets are typically empty until impregnated with a seed, this seed is naturally occurring and has zero matter but infinite density, the seeds eventually go through a natural decay process that leaves them unstable and they eventually explode.”
“If a naturally produced seed decays and explodes, not too much happens because they typically contain equal parts matter and antimatter, these forces naturally cancel each other out, but to increase the possibility of life we build seeds with a little more matter than antimatter, with this small adjustment the post explosion effect is much different, a living universe starts to form in the dimensional pocket and life begins.”
“The core of every living planet is comprised of a smaller seed, and this is the product the wave is trying to deliver, it really is a beautiful symbiotic dance between the smallest molecule in your body and the largest celestial beings.”
“With more life on more planets it makes the wave stronger and more potent, it increases the possibility of reaching its final destination and fulfilling its goal. We are here to help the process, and you could be the one whose genes populate an entire galaxy.”
“So …what is the final destination of the wave?” I asked apprehensively.
“Well for lack of a better term let’s just say it’s an egg… you see the sole purpose of everything from the smallest molecule in your body to the largest celestial being is designed to procreate.”
“So you’re an alien?”
“No... Well kind of, I was genetically built to pass as member of your species for this mission.”
I was really disappointed to find out she was crazy, but she was fun and I really liked her, everybody has a few little quirks and idiosyncrasies and maybe her thinking she is an alien is something I could just deal with, after all she seems perfect in every other way, and very smart.
“So do you still want to keep having sex with me?” I asked.
“Well yes, but we have many creatures that are designed to produce fertilized eggs, they will be released into the wilds of your planet to gather the required specimens, but we need someone to start the process and show them how to navigate this society. We will gather as many eggs as you can fertilize but we also need genetic diversity so these creatures will be released into your world after your job is finished.”
“Hmm.” A long silence set in as I tried to make sense of her ridiculous proposal, at this point I was sure this girl was delusional, but was she silly fun delusional, or scary grab a cop’s gun delusional? I decided to just humor her and ask a few questions. “Does it hurt when they harvest the eggs from you? It sounds so unpleasant.”
“Oh no, it doesn’t hurt at all, I just run the scanner over my tummy and it’s done.”
“Well that doesn’t sound too bad, suppose I do agree to do this; are there any weird unpleasant things I could expect? Like when you ask a genie for an ill-considered wish and it comes with some kind of ironic twist. “
“Ha … I’m not a genie, we are benevolent creatures that are only a force for good, if you do agree to come with me you can leave whenever you want, and you can always come to me with any questions or concerns, I promise to always tell you the truth. I do really like you, and I would never let anything bad happen to you.” She smiled and tenderly kissed my nose.
I tenderly kissed her nose back.