I know who I am, I think. Sarcastic, friendly, funny and kind.
Yet in my head, search and see what you will find.

Cravings, darkness, a fantasy rich world with no end.
Those I know see only the exterior sheen, not the twists and the bends.

My desires, light or dark and so black, why do I have to hide?
Like others, I'm not filled with just light. I have a whole other side.

In my brain resides a girl who exists straddling a thin line.
Wheels turn, cravings etch paths, but ask and I'll tell you I'm fine.

Where did it start, this taste, this eagerness for things rough and profane?
Beginnings don't matter in my case. I'm here now, I just need to find the right lane.

Act out my fantasies, finding a partner in crime, or just try to erase?
I fear exposure to light will kill them or I'll give up the chase.

I'll lose out and wonder the rest of my life, what, where and how.
Craving to feel marks on my skin, hear names I'd never normally allow.

These thoughts drip out of my head, my body reacting the same.
Scenarios churning up my soul and senses when I think of his name.

Are they real, or I am I just playing a vivid, detailed and wicked role?
Passions I long ignored are aflame inside, burning me, to what goal?

Words, meaning what really, whore, slut, cum, pain, belt, restraints, mine and rope.
Do what you're told, and so many other phrases. But the questions remain and I hope.

Do I act out the dreams and fantasies or settle back into my life?
The push and pull on my heart and my mind can cut like a knife.

No answers easily appear. Eventually I may need to decide.
Jump on that train or plane, take my body and brain for a ride?

One day, a siren song repeating over and again in my head.
I'll sleep on it tonight, as I toss and turn all over my bed.

I'm afraid if I wait any longer it will be too late and I'll be far too old.
Those fantasies if not fed and grown, may soon become, so very cold.