When I woke up it felt late. The room was bathed in sunshine, and the bed was empty. I sat up, looking for my young Asian girlfriend May, it was our first holiday together, just twenty-four hours earlier we had enjoyed our first fuck after a long, patience-sapping wait of five months. As I looked around, the reason for both became apparent. She stood in the window, dressed only in her sexy, cute little doll outfit, holding the curtain slightly open and peering out, her tiny eighteen-year-old body ablaze with curiosity.

‘What are you looking at?’ I asked, getting out of bed.

She turned quickly, her finger to her lips. I hurried to the window.

‘Put your shorts on, they will see you!’ She frowned pointing to my exposed morning erection.

‘Who?’ I asked, obeying and wondering what she was talking about.

I joined her at the window and followed her eager eyes to the adjacent terrace were our Dutch neighbour, Jan sat in his half open dressing gown. Between us was a slim, long-haired oriental woman, and I recalled lying in bed the night before, hearing Jan fuck her seemingly relentlessly, whilst my girlfriend mentally joined in, her fingers replicating his thick, thrusting cock, unaware I knew what she was doing.

Jan had shown a keen interest in her from the first moment he saw her and had clearly enjoyed her eyes on his tight, revealing swimming trunks on the beach the previous day. Now, from our viewpoint, we could see little of the woman he talked to, except her hand and the wedding ring upon it. May was shocked; this was a whole new world for her.

We heard a mobile ringing and the woman stood suddenly, moving away and anxiously answering a call, glancing back to where Jan, her seducer, sat smiling. Then as she reached the path that wound through the resort, she waved silently and was gone.

‘Oh my god!’ May cried excitedly, ’Do you think that was her husband calling?’

‘I have no idea.’ I didn’t share her childlike wonder, but I was becoming increasingly aroused by the thought of Jan seeing my girlfriend dressed as she was. ‘Anyway, why do you ask? Are you jealous?’

‘Don’t be silly! She shrieked, her face playfully pretending to look hurt.

His eyes had long left his lover and now glanced at our window. May jumped back in fright, which made me laugh.

‘It’s not funny,’ she moaned, stepping further behind the curtain, ‘he nearly saw me!’

‘But you like him looking at you, don’t you? You enjoyed it yesterday.’

My voice was calm, teasing her confession of the day before back into the morning light. She didn’t answer, uncertain of my placidity in the face of her guilt, her confession of yesterday that she had been aroused by his staring at her in her bikini.

‘It’s okay,’ I reassured her, ‘Your bikini is more revealing, you can let him see you in this.’

‘No!’ May hissed, flashing me a look of confusion. ‘How can you…’

Realising it was going to be an unanswerable question, I grabbed a dressing gown, laughed and went outside, onto the terrace where Jan nodded warmly.

‘How was your evening?’ His smile gave no hint of his thoughts.

I told him of our dinner and he nodded disinterestedly, his eyes betraying his interest in the window behind me in which he had spotted May. When his eyes finally met mine, it was to direct them to the window. I wondered how clearly he had seen her in her cute and sexy nightwear.

‘I was meaning to ask you whether May could help me with a translation problem. I leave tomorrow and am trying to book onward tickets at the travel desk.’

‘They don’t speak English?’ I asked, glancing behind and noticing May was no longer in sight and was leaning into the mirror, applying face cream, singing a song in Thai.

‘They don’t understand my English accent,’ he laughed.

‘I am sure she will. Come, I’ll get her,’ I offered, pausing as my conscience battled briefly with my burgeoning arousal.

Jan crossed the few steps to our terrace and sat down, head tilted as he looked expectantly at the window. With my heart quickening, I slid the terrace door slowly, quietly and fully open. Jan leant forward trying to peer around the curtain and I held it to one side so that he didn’t need to, affording him a clear view into our room. He grinned and his eyes slithered down my girlfriend’s tiny body to her sexy ass in her tight, silky white panties.

Jan smiled, leaning forward to see the front of her in the mirror. May continued singing unaware that her body was being visually inspected in her cute, doll-like nightwear. I let the curtain fall back into place, hiding Jan from her view, my heart thumping at the wrongness, the excitement of what I had just done.

‘May!’ I called into the room, ‘Jan wants your help translating something.’

May came to the doorway, and when she suddenly saw how close he was, she hurriedly pulled the curtain across her so that only her face was visible, oblivious to that being too late. She smiled sweetly as Jan greeted her and I excused myself by saying I was going in to make a coffee. I went behind May, out of sight of Jan and began kissing over her bare shoulder as she spoke to him.

‘Wh-where do you want to go?’ May asked, stuttering as she felt my lips over her bared shoulder.

As Jan spoke, I pressed my body behind her, the curtain hiding her body from his view, and gently stroked her through her silky nightwear. Stroking over her firm breasts, her young nipples, as ever, hardening immediately and I knew once erect, they would be clearly visible through the white silk. That thought aroused me further and my hands continued to stroke down her, sliding over the silky, clinging outfit and groping her firm young body.

Slowly I tugged the curtain back. At first, she gripped it tightly, but as I pressed against her, as my hands groped the pert curve of her ass, her grip relaxed. Gradually, the curtain slipped and her tits, cupped and by and covered only by the silky, lace trimmed top, were exposed to Jan. Her dark brown nipples jutted against the tight white silk and were clearly displayed for him.

With the curtain now around her stomach, I could not resist. My trembling hands groped her ass and then, without warning, I yanked her panties down to her thighs. May gasped, but was unable to move now, aware that if she let go of the curtain, her little Asian pussy would be completely exposed to Jan. Aware to that if she was not careful, her panties would slip to her ankles and let him know she was naked behind the curtain.

I felt her breathing quicken, her sentences beginning to scramble unintelligibly as my hand stroked up her inner thigh. May, in mid-sentence of extolling the virtues of Koh Samui, squealed as my hand opened her thighs and my fingertips brushed over her moist brown slit. She was utterly helpless to prevent my finger slipping up, into her young Asian cunt, as Jan asked her about the best dive spots. She shifted uneasily on my gently probing finger, pushing deeper into her tight little hole.

‘Are you okay?’ Jan asked.

‘Yes, but I need to go to bathroom, sorry!’ May gasped and stepped back, hurriedly drawing the curtain.

I quickly pressed her against the wall, kissing and biting her neck, my finger still wedged up her pussy. She stared up at me open mouthed and wide eyed in shock that I would finger her with Jan merely a curtain breadth away. Yet knowing what she didn’t know, that Jan had enjoyed a good look at her in her sexy little doll outfit and had clearly seen her young Asian tits, had filled me with both guilt and an insatiable lust.

‘May, what time shall I call on you?’ Jan’s voice called suddenly through the curtain.

We both jumped, thinking he had gone.

‘After we come back from beach, okay?’ She replied in an uneven voice.

We waited to hear his footsteps retreat, but didn’t, or couldn’t and I couldn’t stop myself. I pushed her thighs further apart and slid a second finger up her hungry little pussy as her eyes closed, biting her lip to stifle the squeal she wanted to emit.

‘He would love to have you,’ I growled quietly into her ear, my fingers now thrusting up her tight little cunt. ‘Can you imagine his big, white...’

May could no longer suppress her squeals and collapsed in my arms impaled on my fingers that were fucking her. My free hand felt behind her, groping her firm bottom cheeks until my finger found her little asshole. I tried in vain to squeeze my finger into the unyielding hole.

‘You would love to see his big white cock wouldn’t you May?’

She didn’t, or couldn’t answer, head bowed in my arms, unable to prevent my fingers fucking her roughly and she began squealing rhythmically, I knew the signs by now, knew her climax was close and I stopped. I wanted to keep her horny, my plan, to which she was oblivious, now firming in my mind.

‘Let’s go to the beach,’ I sighed, stepping back.

As we walked to the beach my head was filled with the same mixture of guilt, jealousy, and excitement, the same emotional tug of war, familiar feelings to those of us who have shared our loved ones and merely a foretaste of what lay ahead in the hours and months. My guide book, having promised a deserted beach beyond the headland, was now entrusted to take us there. We had glimpsed it when we approached Railay Bay in our little boat, yet then it appeared cut off by the sea.

The promised beach, backed by a semi-circle of karst cliffs offered escapism in its purist form, complete isolation from the crowds on the main beach and no one knew we were going there. Well, at least that was what May thought. I carried my guilt silently as I followed her slight figure towards the headland, the memory of telling Jan exactly where we were going and how to get there after my girlfriend had returned to our room at breakfast. I guessed no I knew, from his sly grin, that he would follow us.

Reaching the tumble of seemingly impenetrable rocks at the end of the beach, I took the lead, clambering, climbing and scrambling until the beach behind was hidden and in front of us stretched an empty expanse of sand. After helping May down we ran across the deserted beach and the romance of the setting and situation made us unable to stop holding hands and snatching kisses. I began to regret telling Jan of our plans, but I sensed it was too late.

We swam, ran and then as May spread her towel out and lay down in her pink bikini. The seclusion eroded my girlfriends’ shyness. Safe in the knowledge no one would disturb us and lying face down in the sun, she had hitched up her pink bikini bottoms, revealing a hint of her pert Thai ass to the sun for the first time in her life. Yet, beyond her, I could see the tall figure of Jan scrambling over the headland and again my emotions were pulled simultaneously in contrasting directions.

‘Take your bikini higher,’ I dared her, ‘No one will see.’

May giggled, and to my amazement she did; reaching behind her she pulled her bikini bottoms right up to her hips, her pert Asian ass now almost completely exposed. As I knelt to take her photo, as Jan drew closer, my desire to protect her, especially her shyness and her modesty, the trials I had fought through to see her body, urged me to warn her of his approach and ensure only I had the privilege of seeing what only a loved one should see and recover her bottom. Yet again, my growing arousal as he neared, the knowledge of what he would see, held sway. Now he would not need to wonder what her ass looked like beneath her panties, now he would see it all and know. My dick stirred seeing my girlfriend, the girl I was falling in love with, so explicitly exposed to another man.

‘Does it feel nice?’ I asked, trying to control the excitement in my voice.

‘It feels sooo strange, tell me if anyone comes.’ She giggled, putting her earphones on.

‘No one will come,’ I assured her, lied to her, watching Jan getting closer and closer to us.

As he neared, he removed his sunglasses so he could have a better look at my girlfriend’s sexy ass. May lay oblivious, her head turned towards me, as Jan stood over her, grinning victoriously, his eyes sweeping up from her ankles to the back of her neck, then lingering admiringly on her bared teenage ass. Finally, he lifted his eyes from her bottom to my eyes and the smugness of his silent grin needed no words. He liked her ass and wanted to see more. Suddenly May shrieked, span around, saw him and hurriedly pulled down her bikini in a futile attempt to hide her already exposed young bottom.

Jan talked casually as he took off his shirt and lowered his shorts to reveal the tight, obscenely revealing trunks he had worn the day before. May tried, but could not resist dropping her eyes to the very obvious bulge of his cock. Only this time, he seemed to notice and the air was instantly heavy with sexual tension. Jan sat next to her, positioning himself in a way that his tight trunks were within a metre of my girlfriend's face and May, assuming no one would notice behind her dark sunglasses, could not take her eyes off that manly bulge.

She confessed much later how she followed the length and visible shape with her eyes, trying to work out what it would look like bared and erect. Having heard the effect of it in action during the night, May could not stop wondering what it would feel like to touch, kiss and suck such a big white cock. And as she imagined straddling him, her body began to ready for him, her little pussy moistening as she pictured herself astride him, lowering herself onto that big cock that now faced her temptingly, threateningly.

Jan seemed well aware of her fascination and sat open legged, inviting her to stare.

His eyes rarely left her body and did not waver, even they met mine. Not only his eyes were directed at May, increasingly his conversation was too and his compliments, that became ever more personal. His questions to May had become ever quieter, drawing her closer, making them more inclusive and me more excluded.

I was wracked with uncertainty, my emotions torn and confused. My instinct was to intervene, to force my way into the conversation and reclaim the girl I loved. Yet the sense of exclusion, the growing sense that something was going to happen that both of them wanted, accentuated my arousal. I wanted to go, to leave them alone and I wanted him to go and leave me alone with her. I knew he wanted me to go, but I didn’t know what she wanted. It was Jan that settled my indecision.

‘I think you should put more lotion on, it’s pretty intense this heat,’ he said looking over the back of her legs.

I quickly assumed control and agreed, sitting beside her legs and pouring lotion onto my hands. Jan watched me smoothing it liberally over her back then he casually moved her hair to one side as I reached her neck and shoulders. I replenished the lotion in my hands and resumed at the back of her ankles, sliding up over her taut little calves. Jan watched in silence as my hands massaged the lotion into the back of her young thighs, sweeping ever higher, ever closer to her pink bikini.

As my fingertips brushed the elasticated trim, I moved it higher, May squealed, but I reassured her and gradually edged it higher over her firm ass, slowly exposing as teasing glimpse of her ass to him again. As I put the bottle down, Jan edged closer, glanced down at my girlfriend, her face turned to me, glanced up at me with mischievous eyes, then hovered his hand over the back of her legs.

I closed my eyes, my heart pounding, my cock lengthening, my morality shouting at me to stop him, aware that May had no idea, and aware that when my eyes opened, I would see another man’s hands on my girlfriends bottom. I opened them, just as his fingertips brushed gently along the back of her smooth young thighs. May, eyes closed, lay completely oblivious to the fact that a man she didn’t know was stroking her legs. Up and down, his fingertips drifted, inching ever higher to the curve of her ass.

I avoided eye contact with him, unable to see my reluctance to protect her in his eyes. I could only watch transfixed as the tips of his fingers explored my girlfriend legs. Satisfied I was not going to stop him, his fingers moved higher, over her bikini bottoms, then stopped. I looked up to see his smug, victorious grin, and he took a gentle hold of her bikini and pushed it up over her ass cheeks, denuding them for his eyes.

His broad smile showed his approval at the delicious visual firmness of her Asian ass and his fingers spread out and slid up over the pert cheeks of her bottom. His palms flattened against her bottom, increasing the sensations for both as his hands began to slide up over her upper thighs and then out, spreading her cheeks and making her bikini bottoms ever more thong like. My cock hardened and I daren’t look at his, as his thumbs extended into the secret, private cleft between her cheeks.

I knew May was aroused, too aroused to stop him, or me as she assumed it was. She bit her lip, stirred, then buried her face in her towel. With less chance of being caught, or perhaps Jan felt she knew it was his hands, he sat up. His hands moved now with more an unmistakeably sexual purpose, spreading, groping, the little ass cheeks of my still silent girlfriend.

Helplessly, I watched him move her bag under her hips and the obedience with which she lifted her hips, then lowered them onto the bag, allowing her ass to be raised, astonished me. Now there could be no mistake, Jan was readying my girlfriend to mount her, to fuck her publicly, right in front of me. His head tilted as his thumbs stretched and edged closer to the gusset of her bikini, readying to ease it aside and see her Asian cunt.

I knew if May looked up at me it would be a pivotal moment, either she would smile in acceptance or she would shriek in shocked fury that I allowed another man to touch her. Jan nodded to get my attention, then nodded to the sea. It was a good option, not the moral option, but the one that extricated me from blame. I silently padded down into the waves, my dick straining against my shorts.

Like a deciding penalty, I wanted to look and I didn’t. I decided not to, at least as much as I could resist, but as I was facing out to sea, a cry rent the peaceful air. It was not a cry of pleasure. As I looked back, shock and panic took hold. Everything happened in a flash and suddenly my girlfriend was running towards me, her face creased with worry and Jan was hurriedly pulling his trunks up. As she neared, tears stained her innocent face. What had he done? What had I done?

She clung to me in a way that stung me with guilt for the situation I had engineered. Wrapping my arms tightly around her, I fired questions at her, but she was in no mood to answer, panting only her hatred for him. Looking up, he was already clambering over the rocks. It was the last time we saw him. Gradually, she stopped trembling and when she was sure he had gone, she let me lead her by the hand out of the sea.

‘I didn’t know you were in the sea,’ she said in a voice recovering from tears, as we sat back down where it had all happened.

‘What happened May? Tell me.’

‘I am so sorry,’ she said in the meekest voice I had heard her use.

Four words that meant complete and unwarranted, exoneration for me. As I had suspected, May had no idea that the hands feeling her were his and as I had hoped, was oblivious to my complicity in his actions and remained oblivious for many years, until in fact, now.

‘He touched me and…’ her voice struggled to say the words. I urged her to continue. ‘I thought it was you, putting sun cream on me and at first, it was okay, but…’

‘Show me, it will be easier May, it’s okay, it isn’t your fault.’

She lay face down and I sat beside her where the sand was still ruffled by Jan. I placed my hands on the back of her thighs and her voice guided my hands to where his hands had been, over her bottom, pushing her bikini up, groping her ass. Again I pushed her bikini bottoms up over her ass. Yet that much I knew, had seen and as much as it excited me to re-enact it again, now I wanted it all, from her.

‘Did it feel nice? Sexy?’ I asked. She nodded, apologizing, reminding me she thought it was my hands.

‘It’s okay May, I know you did. So were you turned on?’ She nodded, still face down.

‘Very?’ She nodded. My cock regained stiffness instantly knowing Jan had aroused her so much. ‘Did he move your bikini?’

She nodded, ‘Yes.’

‘Like this?’ I tugged her bikini bottoms aside, exposing both her taut little asshole and a clear rear view of her brown slit. She paused, then nodded.

‘Did he touch you? Like this?’ My fingertips slid along her private cleft, brushing all the way down to the lips of her pussy. She sighed that he had. ‘And you were wet like you are now?’

Her pussy lips urged my finger inside then hugged it tightly. She gasped her answer, ‘I was…more wet.’

‘Did he finger you May?’

‘A bit… yes.’

The words stung me, filling me with anger and an arousal I could barely control. ‘And you liked it?’ I moved my body against hers, fingering her rhythmically. ‘Didn’t you?’

‘I thought it was… yes.’ She gasped.

‘Then what did he do?’

‘He… he,’ her voice broke now not from tears, but from shame fuelled arousal. ‘He said to me…’

‘What?’ My voice now in control, assuming the moral high ground. I stopped fingering her, pulled down her bikini bottoms and hovered my hand over her little bare ass.

‘He said… he said you need a good fucking don’t you?’

Panting, my mouth bit along her wet neck to her ear. ‘You do need a good fucking don’t you?’

I raised my hand and slapped my palm loudly across her naked little bottom. She jerked and yelped, more with shock than pain. I repeated my question and smacked her little brown ass again, the firmness of her Asian cheeks causing my hand to almost bounce off them. It was a first for me, the feeling of spanking a girl and for her too and what was clear even then, was how much it aroused her.

A man would later describe my girlfriend as having the most spankable ass he had ever seen, but I could at least claim to be the first to spank it and as I lifted my hand so she would raise her little Thai ass, tentatively, obediently ready for the next smack. Her yelps became gasps, moans of pleasure from the unfamiliar sensations surging from her bottom through her body.

‘Then what happened?’ I ordered, unable to resist playing with my cock as I listened, spanked her.

‘I-I realised it was him… not you… and I look round… and he had his... cock out.’

‘You saw his cock?’

She panted her reply as my hand smacked onto her pretty little ass. ‘Yesssss. He asked me to go to the cave with him and suck it.’

I could take no more, aware that any moment it would be too late and I would spurt over her bare ass, aware too that May was more aroused than I had seen her before. She was desperate, aching, to be fucked. I lifted her hips and spread her thighs and May obediently got on all fours like the submissive little Asian girls she had seen in sexy movies. I moved behind her, brandishing my fiercely erect cock.

‘Tell me, what his cock was like…’

It wasn’t the description of his cock that fuelled my arousal, so much as the fact she had seen it, that it was her words describing it and most of all, that despite what had happened, she had wanted his cock. She panted as she described how long it was, how thick, how it curled upwards, how it looked like the big white cocks in sexy movies and while she panted her lust for his cock, I nuzzled the raging tip of mine against her brown slit, and then pushed it hard into her tight Asian cunt.

May squealed loudly, her cry echoing back from the silent cliffs surrounding us, announcing that she was being publicly fucked. And she was. I drove my cock mercilessly into her, disregarding the tightness of her young cunt, uncaring who saw or heard, my anger and arousal had overflowed and gripping her little hips, I fucked May like a lewd dog.

She took her fucking like the punishment I pretended it was, her sweet Asian ass raised to make her pussy as open a target as it could be, her back arched, shoulders propped up by her little arms and her head lowered, squeals forced loudly from her mouth with every thrust of my cock up her. And all my carnal desire poured out in a torrent of vulgarity, the like of which her innocent ears had never been exposed to.

‘This is what you want isn’t May? Your sweet, little innocent face doesn’t fool me anymore. You just want a big white cock up your Asian cunt don’t you?’

Never had such words been directed at her and there was no reply, other than her sexual submission, her offering of her body, her young slit, for me to use for my pleasure. Tightening my grip of her slim hips I raised myself, pushing even deeper into her tiny body, my thighs slapping into the firm cheeks of her ass.

‘You wanted a white cock for years didn’t you May? You wanted it, now you got it, go on May say it, tell me to fuck you.’

Her mouth wouldn’t or couldn’t say the words, only high pitched squeals which were forced out in rhythm with my thrusting cock. I looked down at her tiny frame, the fragility of her body, relishing the eroticism of the contrast between my white hands holding her, my white cock thrusting into her and her submissive oriental body. I thought of her innocence, her strict traditional upbringing, her purity when I met her, her polite Asian mannerisms. And I fucked her harder, faster, almost bestial.

‘Fuck you May!’ I growled, ‘you little Asian….’

The words didn’t come, luckily, as the inescapable tightness of her young Thai cunt pulling, squeezing and sucking on my cock was proving too much. No condom, my conscience screamed, but it was too late after Jan had touched her I needed to make her mine again, all mine. I leant back, using her pussy for my own pleasure, firing my cum in frantic spurts deep inside her.

I stopped. The sounds of mutual panting and the gentle rhythm of the waves behind us were the only sounds. Her body held my cock like a vice and I waited for my cock to soften before I could withdraw from her. It was only then I noticed she was trembling and I knew I had said too much, been too uncaring, again. I sat back gasping in the heat, admiring her cum flecked pussy until she sat down too, facing away. I was not alone in saying too much. We had crossed a bridge, almost without realising it and there was no way back.

We both hungered for normality, the romanticism of the night before, a sexless purity from which our relationship, our love, had grown. We didn’t speak all the way back to the room and we didn’t kiss until long after dinner, throughout which I feared I had caused irreparable damage. Yet in crossing the bridge, a new closeness had emerged, we had both overstepped the mark, the line of socially acceptable behaviour in relationships.

It wasn’t how I wanted our first holiday and our first time together, to end. As we sat in silence on the plane home, with work and university, families, time apart and loneliness ahead, I was unsure whether to feel regret or pride. We had both shared things that should have remained private with another, but now we shared a secret with each other.

Little did we know then how that secret would bind us together; nor did we realise how severely our love would be tested by it in the months to come. For ahead of us and oblivious to us then, lay an incident that neither of us will ever forget.