In all my wildest dreams, I could not have imagined that pain could bring so much pleasure! I had always thought that the two sensations were separate and apart – one could not lead to the other. But I was so wrong. Over the years to come, I would experience much worse pain which would lead to euphoric pleasure but for now, I could only remember what it felt like when Panek’s cock stretched my ass as he fucked me.

However, just to be clear…I didn’t cum as a result of the anal penetration…I still had to stimulate my own clit in order to gain full satisfaction in that respect. But now I knew I liked anal – the sensation of being filled, the fear and anticipation of the pain….and when the pleasure arrived, I was learning to let go of the pain….to surrender to it...which made the pleasure all the more intense.

I had already experienced pain at the hands of Renaud – in the upstairs bar when he pinched my nipples to make me scream – but at that point I had not associated pain with pleasure.  I endured the pain simply to please Him – the nipple squeeze was pain…the anal sex was pain…and I’d do it for him because I was in love.

In hindsight (amazing how that’s always perfect vision!), Renaud was grooming me to become his slave. As a naive young girl, I had no idea – to me this was still a game and the prize for winning was a sophisticated lover with some strange fetish-like tastes. I was perfectly happy to go along with his “games” if it meant I got to be with him and keep him as my own.

His domination of me was subtle in its approach, so subtle that I didn't even realise he was doing it. He explained everything I had done in the past and everything I was doing now with him in terms of my natural submissiveness. He arranged every aspect of our relationship such that it was MY choice to continue every time.

The morning after my anal deflowering, I woke up in a kind of daze…my mind confused. All I wanted to do was stay in bed and savour the memories of the night before. But I knew I had to get up because I needed to renew my work permit or I would have to leave the country…and that would mean the end of Renaud and me.

So I dragged myself into the shower, quickly dressed and ran to catch the bus to the main village. I was sitting on the bus daydreaming when I suddenly realised that I was naked under my dress. In my haste I hadn't even thought to put any panties on. My next thought made me wake up completely; I had been fucked in the ass! At that point it didn't matter in my mind who it was that had been there; just the fact that I had lost my anal virginity was enough to occupy my mind. I sat there on the bus looking around at the other women thinking to myself, “Who else has been fucked in the ass?”

Something had changed in me; I was feeling a sense of completeness, of being more of a woman – Renaud had said, “A real woman is a three-hole woman,” and now I was one! All morning, in the bus, in the permit office and then again on the way back, I felt a sense of occasion as if it were my birthday or something.

Then suddenly, without warning, it occurred to me – it was Panek who was first and not Renaud! And I didn’t know how to deal with that. My mind was a confusion of emotions; regret that I had given away such a precious gift to the wrong man; anger that Renaud had not accepted my offer; and worry that I may have driven Renaud away with my selfish behaviour. Being a bit drunk was no excuse for what I’d done; I almost justified it by telling myself that I was mad at Renaud. He had his chance and he blew it!

In my mind, I wasn’t his sub or his slave - I still expected him to treat me as a normal girlfriend even if he did have some bizarre habits. I acted like a spoilt and stubborn young Polish girl.

But I was also in awe of the way he could make me feel. His skills in the way he could make me cum with his hands, his mouth, his fingers.  Add to that his experience, his stature in the village (he was a successful member of society) made him a fabulous prize for a young girl.  I was still under the impression that I had won him and not that he had taken me as his own – foolish girl!

For the next few nights, I avoided Renaud, pretending to be unwell but unwilling to face the truth; that I felt I had betrayed him. I was ashamed of my behaviour but at the same time I was mad at Him for not being there when I had given myself to Him. My self-imposed distancing from him became harder and harder to endure because I missed him so.

Similarly, I tried to stay away from Panek because while Renaud accepted my absence, all Panek wanted was more sex. I managed to dissuade him saying that my ass was still hurting but I knew this would not keep him off me for long. Sucking his cock calmed him down but I knew he would want my ass again soon. My biggest problem was that I was spending a lot of time with him, drinking in the Polish bar…..and I can’t refuse sex when I’m drunk! Anal sex had excited Panek and now all he wanted was anal! But our relationship was fading and fading fast.

After a few days, when I could not avoid Renaud any longer, I went to him and told him I was ready. He told me to meet him that afternoon in the upstairs bar in the middle of the village (the scene of our first time together). After such a relatively long separation, we wasted no time.

Renaud had established a rule when we met alone - I was to be naked – so as soon as we entered the bar from the landing, I stripped without being told to.  Once naked, he laid me down on the covered bench at the side of the room and went to work on me with his mouth. His skills were undiminished by our separation and it wasn’t long before he made me cum.

He looked up into my face and asked “Are you ready to give me your ass?” My mind was a confusion of emotions again; being so intimate with him once again showed me just how much I loved him but at the same time I knew I could not tell him the truth of my deceit.  The fact that he was so proud that I was so in love with him did not make things better for me.

He moved me down onto the floor, on my hands and knees then pushed my head and shoulders down keeping my ass high. My hands were down between my legs, playing with my clit, making myself wet and he used this mixed with some baby oil to lubricate my ass in preparation for him entering me. He slipped first one finger…then two inside me, stretching me in preparation for his cock.

At this point, he was still fully dressed – he did this to remove that last layer of protection from me leaving me vulnerable and open to his will. Keeping up his status as the Dominant while enhancing the anticipation I felt in that very exposed position.

 He was standing behind me and he pushed my legs together so he could stand astride me. He was using his fingers inside my ass, adding the oil and his own spit to my wetness. At some point he removed his shorts – I was too high on emotion to see when….and the position I was in did not make it any easier to observe him. I knew he had done this because I suddenly felt the head of his cock pressing against my opening, pushing it wider – the bulbous end slipped in past the first resistance easily.  Then in one slow thrust, he slid the entire length of his cock inside me saying “Good girl…this ass is mine now.”

Glancing under my body, I could see his feet and his lower legs. He was standing with his legs either side of me, crouching down to push his cock into my ass.

At first it hurt but he was smaller than Panek so I was finding it easy to accommodate him. Anal sex with Panek was more physically pleasurable because of his size but in my mind, this was the ultimate for me. Giving in, surrendering my ass to Renaud meant everything to me because I was finally and completely His. The fact that it also pleased him made my submission all the more meaningful for me.

For a brief moment, I was afraid he would notice and make some comment about how easily I had taken him in but I surmised that he put it down to me opening myself up with my fingers as he had instructed me to do.

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When he was all the way in, his stomach pressed against my ass cheeks he said, “I want you completely and forever”. My mind stopped for a second to think about what he had just said but my fingers never stopped moving on my clit.  He started to move slowly, fucking me, sliding his length in and out of my ass. I came hard and then it happened.

For the first time since we started seeing each other, Renaud came…he came in my ass! His breathing was loud in my ears as we came together finally, our love for each other was complete.

Afterwards, we stayed there on the floor in each other arms, kissing and caressing, gentle whispers.  But all too soon, he had to break the spell and leave, going back to his life…and his wife.

Walking home, again my mind was conflicted; I was happy and in love, content that his cum was inside me but at the same time, insanely jealous as he went to his wife….and internally confused by my dishonesty with him. How can I tell him that he wasn’t the first?  I can’t! I used my jealousy to hide my lie from myself.

The next day was the start of the weekend of August 15th, a huge religious celebration and holiday in Greece, originally devoted to the Virgin Mary but in more modern times, a chance to get together and party hard. Second only to Christmas and Easter in importance, it was a time of crazy hours and little spare time for those of us who work in the restaurant business. Little chance to get together with my love!

Our next meeting took place in the house under construction next to his bar.  We spent the time talking and fucking. Talking about me becoming his (my dream!) and about the coming winter. The sex was all about his mouth and my ass – every time now he wanted to be there. I was becoming used to it as well – Panek also favoured this hole when we had sex (we never made love anymore).

As the tourist season started to wind down, Renaud and I managed to spend more and more time with each other. We even managed a day together in a different village where we could have lunch, talk and be with each other without having to hide it. I cherished these times with what I now considered the love of my life – I never wanted it to end.

Then Panek lost his job – the idiot got into a fight with a co-worker and got the sack.  This ruined everything as he was now home all day and I couldn’t get away to be with Renaud. He was drinking a lot of the time which resulted in us fighting more and more. I was getting frustrated not being able to see Renaud and of course, money was now short so I was supporting both of us with my job.

Inevitably, after one more fight, we broke up.  The owner of our room wanted to throw us out because of our fighting all the time and, as the season was ending, we had to leave. I decided that I didn’t want to go back to Poland – my mother and my sister were at that time living in Germany so I chose to go there to live with them.

On the morning of my departure, Renaud found a way for us to be together one last time. We walked up to a field high above the bay where we sat in the warm September sun, kissing and holding each other. He told me that he didn’t want to lose me and that he would come and visit me in Germany. My heart was close to bursting, beating at a ferocious rate.

And for the first time since we met I said the words…”I love you”