Quote by tubby1961
I know they say you shouldn't knock something you have never tried BUT I have no interest in sticking my little penis into a poo shute.
Eh!? are you gay or something?
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There's nothing like a show of power, domination and control like plowing into your partner's lower gastrointestinal tract...
But otherwise I suppose because it's not designed to bring whole human beings into this world it's a lot tighter, and that feels fucking good I must admit, obviously sometimes not so good for the accommodator.
But otherwise I suppose because it's not designed to bring whole human beings into this world it's a lot tighter, and that feels fucking good I must admit, obviously sometimes not so good for the accommodator.
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What an awful, snobbish thing to do. Didn't your mother teach you to be polite and not ignore others?
But if people have such highly inflated opinions of themselves that they think they are worth anyone and everyone's time then it just confirms they are definitely not worth the trouble. There is likely only one thing on their mind anyway.
But if people have such highly inflated opinions of themselves that they think they are worth anyone and everyone's time then it just confirms they are definitely not worth the trouble. There is likely only one thing on their mind anyway.
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I think the pics that Dancing Doll posted are a little extreme to say the least. Clearly, there is no argument as to which photo looks better when comparing a bad makeup-less day to and airbrushed one.
In my humble opinion, the problem is that men look the same all the time - no surprises. But woman look different one hour to the next and it's this contrast between a flawless complexion and a, well, flawed complexion that leaves me wondering how she suddenly got so ugly overnight. This could be when unconditional love for someone is important.
In my humble opinion, the problem is that men look the same all the time - no surprises. But woman look different one hour to the next and it's this contrast between a flawless complexion and a, well, flawed complexion that leaves me wondering how she suddenly got so ugly overnight. This could be when unconditional love for someone is important.
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I don't see the attraction myself. You don't seem to get much out of the box with the iPad, software and hardware wise. Behind the slick façade, there isn't much in the way of innovation and plain computing grunt, mainly due to that pursuit of aesthetic perfection. That goes for all apple products I suppose. And even if I did like them, I wouldn't want one for the simple fact that my Grandmother thinks she is the bees knees whipping out her iPad in front of everyone and playing Island in the Sun by Weezer. Hip hip... not.
In saying that, I am an Apple computer fanboy and I don't know how I would survive without my MacBook pro and iMac. Their OS is pure bliss and their battery life owns every PC equivalent.
How has Steve Jobs not kicked the bucket already?
In saying that, I am an Apple computer fanboy and I don't know how I would survive without my MacBook pro and iMac. Their OS is pure bliss and their battery life owns every PC equivalent.
How has Steve Jobs not kicked the bucket already?
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* Textasaurus-Rex.
* "Oh, I see you like to read the Cosmopolitan..." Relationships and sex can't be learnt from a half page survey. Or are us mere males really that simple?
* Like, says 'like' in like every sentence, like multiple times. Like, go read a book or something.
* Underarm hair.
* Drives unreasonably slowely, with face planted against the windscreen, on the inside lane, holding people up.
* "Oh, I see you like to read the Cosmopolitan..." Relationships and sex can't be learnt from a half page survey. Or are us mere males really that simple?
* Like, says 'like' in like every sentence, like multiple times. Like, go read a book or something.
* Underarm hair.
* Drives unreasonably slowely, with face planted against the windscreen, on the inside lane, holding people up.
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I have a couple of times a while ago admittedly. It was at a time when I was doing a lot of road cycling and would come home hardly able to walk afterwards. And at the risk of sounding like a right tosser, the sex was just plain boring really.
I suppose it would help to use a comdom, but then if she questions why she didn't feel it, then just tell her it was a small one because you had jerked off to videos of your ex earlier in the day. Should change the subject quickly enough.
Also, if you plain to do this, remember to first unleash the canine in you and go doggy unless you are an Oscar worthy actor.
I suppose it would help to use a comdom, but then if she questions why she didn't feel it, then just tell her it was a small one because you had jerked off to videos of your ex earlier in the day. Should change the subject quickly enough.
Also, if you plain to do this, remember to first unleash the canine in you and go doggy unless you are an Oscar worthy actor.
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I tried it one night when she was out at a family gathering. The text described all sorts of things we were to do with the inclusion of multiple expletives.
Ten minutes later I get a text back saying "Fuck you dickhead!" I just assume she is trying to get dirty aswell.
But apparently her young cousin had started reading it out in front of everyone at the dinner table. We ended up watching a bit of telly that night.
Ten minutes later I get a text back saying "Fuck you dickhead!" I just assume she is trying to get dirty aswell.
But apparently her young cousin had started reading it out in front of everyone at the dinner table. We ended up watching a bit of telly that night.
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Quote by DirtyMartiniQuote by shi_squaredQuote by obscura
Unless she's a double amputee, she can do it herself. What else would one like while we're at it? To have their anti-ageing revitalising cell-renewal nightly skin cream applied, toe nails filed or eyebrows plucked?
mmm, how about painting my nails?
Oh, I'd volunteer for that if he doesn't want to...
Go ahead sir. I'm sure shi^2 doesn't want to end up with painted nails and fingers. Early onset of Parkinson's you see.
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I was at work one night around a year ago and there was this dude who had taken a seat next to this girl sat at the bar. He kept buying her drinks even though he was still on his first. As time went on she got more and more drunk and he acted like the perfect gent he wasn't. When he began making motioning movements towards the door and pulling her arm etc., I asked where he thought he was going and he told me he was taking her home. I asked her if she was okay to go with him and she said no in a roundabout way so I told her to come out the back and I'd call a cab. I pushed him away and said, 'you're out of luck tonight, mate' and that's when he launched across the bar and grabbed me, full of rage, and pulled me over the bar punching and kicking. I landed a few good hits but this guy was pretty big and I wasn't. Was one of the three times my nose has been broken.
But after all that, I guess it's not really relevant to this thread because I never intended to have a fist fight with a tough guy who goes ape when he loses control.
But after all that, I guess it's not really relevant to this thread because I never intended to have a fist fight with a tough guy who goes ape when he loses control.
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The Affluence of Incohol
I had eighteen bottles of whiskey and was told by my
wife to empty the contents down the sink or else. I
said I would and proceeded with this unpleasant task.
I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured it
down the sink, with the exception of one glass, which I
drank. I then withdrew the cork from the second bottle
and likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which
I drank. I extracted the cork from the third bottle and
poured the glass down the sink, which I drank. I pulled
the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the
bottle down the glass, which I drank. I pulled the cork
from the next glass and drank one sink out it and threw the
rest down the bottle, which I drank. I pulled the sink
out the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle.
Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink
and drank the pour. When I had everything empty, I
steadied the house with one hand, counted the glasses,
corks, bottles, and sinks with the other, which was 29
and as the house came by I counted them again.
Finally, I had all the houses in one bottle, which I
drank. I'm not half as think you drunk I am. I fool
so feelish I don't know who is me and the drunker I stand
here the longer I get. I'm not under the affluence of
incohol as some tinkle peep I am.
Cheers
I had eighteen bottles of whiskey and was told by my
wife to empty the contents down the sink or else. I
said I would and proceeded with this unpleasant task.
I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured it
down the sink, with the exception of one glass, which I
drank. I then withdrew the cork from the second bottle
and likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which
I drank. I extracted the cork from the third bottle and
poured the glass down the sink, which I drank. I pulled
the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the
bottle down the glass, which I drank. I pulled the cork
from the next glass and drank one sink out it and threw the
rest down the bottle, which I drank. I pulled the sink
out the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle.
Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink
and drank the pour. When I had everything empty, I
steadied the house with one hand, counted the glasses,
corks, bottles, and sinks with the other, which was 29
and as the house came by I counted them again.
Finally, I had all the houses in one bottle, which I
drank. I'm not half as think you drunk I am. I fool
so feelish I don't know who is me and the drunker I stand
here the longer I get. I'm not under the affluence of
incohol as some tinkle peep I am.
Cheers
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by HoneyBee000Quote by obscura
I love the stereotyping in this thread...
ha ha care to break my female stereotyping hee hee
I'll be your flower anytime honeybee
Although, I am going to rescind my statement and agree with the female's theory on this one because I am definitely one in a million.
Active Ink Slinger
Quote by honkyhorny
that was good, the whole turbulance thing was good. i heard that planes can stand level 15 turbulance and the highest recorded is like 3.3 or something like that ;P
Are you talking about the Ellrod index? El value of 15 would probably break an aircraft apart! But I can't be sure, my fluid dynamics exam pwned me last week
Also,
It’s all but impossible for turbulence to cause a crash
I read this on another website a while ago and was speaking to my Uncle about it, he's a commercial pilot instructor and does international long haul routes. He mentioned that's the most careless comment for a pilot to make. Firstly, turbulance can and has definitely caused airplane crashes. Turbulance, particularly clear-air turbulance, injures hundreds of people a year. If you walk around inside a plane of sit in a seat without a belt on, you are still hurtling though the air at just under the speed of sound and if the plane hits a wind shear and experiences rapid acceleration, you are going to hit the roof/wall/floor very very hard. And that's not just 'uncomfortable'.